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We broke up because...
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He didn't like my strategy of starting fights so we could "make up" later0
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Errrr, sorry that was rather overzealous. What I meant to say is, Happy Friday!1
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He was always making out with himself..eerrr,,yeah..exiting now.0
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She had a hairy butt1
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His had more hair.0
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She always had a plumber crack0
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His cat had no skill0
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Umm.. I got nothing after that...0
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She had nothing... Even I'm not that broke0
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Had to keep everything hidden from her to make it look like I had nothing so she wouldn't run me dry.0
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I wanted a provider and she wouldn't give me the lint in her pocket0
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She was to aggressive0
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she needed to learn to be self sufficient and provide for herself so she could enjoy a relationship with someone0
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She was too vigorous0
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We just couldn't see eye to eye.0
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He was always wanting eye contact1
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i refused to wear contacts0
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She didn't like my contacts, said they creep her out.0
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She was blind as a bat and kept walking into walls.0
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She wouldn't wash her damn face0
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he'd laugh if i bumped into a wall0
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I laughed at her for bumping into a wall0
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Holy cow.... I never broke up with her.... She is in my closet @JeanieWww0
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he liked to paint his toenails, but wouldn't give me a pedi0
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Was always trying to start people on fire1
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Stole all my socks0
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blamed me for not going to the gym0
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Used to "go to the gym" but would instead sneak off to the bar for her "energy drink" she used to call it. Her alcoholism eventually put an end to us.0
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He's a Red Sox fan, need I say anymore.0
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