We broke up because...

LonniJay

He didn't like my strategy of starting fights so we could "make up" later

projectsix

LonniJay wrote: »

He didn't like my strategy of starting fights so we could "make up" later

CAN WE PLEASE JUST SKIP THE FOREPLAY HERE AND MAKE OUT

projectsix

Errrr, sorry that was rather overzealous. What I meant to say is, Happy Friday!

littlewolf3785

He was always making out with himself..eerrr,,yeah..exiting now.

liftorgohome

She had a hairy butt

littlewolf3785

His had more hair.

liftorgohome

She always had a plumber crack

FabulousFantasticFifty

His cat had no skill

littlewolf3785

Umm.. I got nothing after that...

LonniJay

She had nothing... Even I'm not that broke

littlewolf3785

Had to keep everything hidden from her to make it look like I had nothing so she wouldn't run me dry.

LonniJay

I wanted a provider and she wouldn't give me the lint in her pocket

MzIrish

She was to aggressive

JeanieWww

she needed to learn to be self sufficient and provide for herself so she could enjoy a relationship with someone

LonniJay

She was too vigorous

DWBalboa

We just couldn't see eye to eye.

littlewolf3785

He was always wanting eye contact

cariduttry

i refused to wear contacts

littlewolf3785

She didn't like my contacts, said they creep her out.

liftorgohome

She was blind as a bat and kept walking into walls.

LonniJay

She wouldn't wash her damn face

JeanieWww

he'd laugh if i bumped into a wall

HostageCat

I laughed at her for bumping into a wall

Abhi_131196

Holy cow.... I never broke up with her.... She is in my closet @JeanieWww

cariduttry

he liked to paint his toenails, but wouldn't give me a pedi

LonniJay

Was always trying to start people on fire

Locolady98

Stole all my socks

princess0lexi

blamed me for not going to the gym

projectsix

Used to "go to the gym" but would instead sneak off to the bar for her "energy drink" she used to call it. Her alcoholism eventually put an end to us.

littlewolf3785

He's a Red Sox fan, need I say anymore.