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We broke up because...
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She was alergic to my carpet0
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His carpet was out of date0
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She got upset at the carpet and drapes question!
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He never dreamed about me, I heard him talking in his sleep about adopting puppies instead0
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She didn't like the puppies I bought her0
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He didn't get me English bulldogs, which is what I asked for...0
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She wanted to ride me like a bull0
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He wouldn't take my bull by the horns0
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He was always Horny at the most inappropriate times. (can I even say that?)
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She wasn't spontaneous enough for me.
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The fondling at Bible study was the last straw1
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Always thumpen the bible at me0
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I wasn't there for his race0
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Always getting lost0
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Was always giving me poor directions0
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Would never listen0
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Never let me drive0
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She kept running over people0
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She didn't know how to drive fast0
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He liked Fast Women!0
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He was stuck in first gear!
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She couldn't drive stick in an automatic. 0
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Was never ever paying attention to the road!0
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She was always on the road hitch hiking0
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He stole my cat!0
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He was always disappearing at night when this light appeared in the sky!0
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He was always snooping my internet history and thought his friends were OUR friends. 0
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He didn't like my shoes0
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She would never model her shoes for me. 0
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