We broke up because...
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She produced freaky porn0
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He wouldn't move for love0
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She wanted me to move out!0
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She wouldn’t let me borrow her red dress0
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She only wanted me for my Wardrobe0
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She didnt like MY clothes1
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Would never buy me new clothes0
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She kept going on and on and on about how I pay more attention to the dog then her. You know what? I don't see you jumping all over me when i first walk through the door1
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Had a special relationship with Fido
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She kept wanting me to call her Fido and it was weird0
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We are still together
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She treated me like a dog. Even gave me a dog treat and patted me on the head once.0
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His prunejuice always gave me the sh1ts
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She always stunk up the bathroom. I mean come on light a candle or something!
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he still counts 3...2...1... chesss cant stand old fashioned ways0
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hes was so hairy I had to wax him on hes sleep and he tough it was a fantasie so things excalated he got crazy and wanted to beat me up!!!! this man is insane1
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He stuffed the pillows with potatoes and tricked me into a pillow fight0
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She couldn't cope when I whooped her *kitten* in our pillow fights!1
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She always wanted to pillow fight even when I was sleeping1
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He slept too much1
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Because I lied0
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She wouldn't let me take her picture. Too camera shy. I only wanted some for the house.0
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Like I told you before you need to put a ring on it to get that kind of intimacy!
He wanted to take nudes of me and I say I'm not that kinda girl0 -
She pushed me down the steps over a suggestion I made about pictures. I said don't "push me".0
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said he wanted to learn how to record audio; so I gave him a few pointers and let him borrow my prized microphones. Come to find out he wanted to record himself farting and now my mics smell like assss...0
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... It WAS a gun in his pocket and he wasn't happy to see me!0
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His Fetish was to wear my Heels when I was away from home!0
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