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We broke up because...

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  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
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    I thought she wanted me to share my booty before marriage :s
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,440 Member
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    Shared his booty with everybody..
  • Masyn88
    Masyn88 Posts: 1,650 Member
    edited May 2020
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    Her body was a temple, and I couldn't respect that
  • ClimbingWolf
    ClimbingWolf Posts: 298 Member
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    she didnt like me eating all her fries :D:D
  • Diatonic12
    Diatonic12 Posts: 32,344 Member
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    He was always checking himself out in the mirror like a pet parakeet...

    ku3cdudi1ux3.png

  • ClimbingWolf
    ClimbingWolf Posts: 298 Member
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    became jealous on my reflection
  • riffwalkdale
    riffwalkdale Posts: 241 Member
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    Thought he was Narcissus.
  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
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    She was more Dorian Grey than narcissus. wait...
  • riffwalkdale
    riffwalkdale Posts: 241 Member
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    Started calling me Lena and kept asking why I was walking through Mississippi.
  • Masyn88
    Masyn88 Posts: 1,650 Member
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    Didn't think it was kool that I could spell Mississippi in 1.04 seconds - IVE BEEN PRACTICING SIBCE GRADE ONE!!!
  • riffwalkdale
    riffwalkdale Posts: 241 Member
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    made fun the fact that I had to say "Wed-nes-day" to spell Wednesday
  • Masyn88
    Masyn88 Posts: 1,650 Member
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    Pronounced the P in raspberries, the R in February, the L in almond and other equally atrocious and nigh on unspeakable linguistic acts
  • ClimbingWolf
    ClimbingWolf Posts: 298 Member
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    she wasn't into creating our own lingo
  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
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    Spoke in klingon constantly. It is not a sexy language for the bedroom...or the kitchen counter...or the living room floor...or the back deck, or...
  • Masyn88
    Masyn88 Posts: 1,650 Member
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    Its sexy if you want to win the WAR!!!

    We broke up because he disagreed with my views on intergalactic violence.

  • Callousedthoughts
    Callousedthoughts Posts: 2,090 Member
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    Any time I said intergalactic, she broke into Intergalactic Planetary and did the robot
  • riffwalkdale
    riffwalkdale Posts: 241 Member
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    Masyn88 wrote: »
    Pronounced the P in raspberries, the R in February, the L in almond and other equally atrocious and nigh on unspeakable linguistic acts

    Well... now I just feel attacked... that's why we broke up. Didn't appreciate my enunciation.
  • ClimbingWolf
    ClimbingWolf Posts: 298 Member
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    stepped over other's comments :p
  • Masyn88
    Masyn88 Posts: 1,650 Member
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    Thought my seizures were random, spastic dance sessions.
  • riffwalkdale
    riffwalkdale Posts: 241 Member
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    Couldn't keep up with my long strides.

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