We broke up because...

Lemonshake

He had horrible taste in food

Spnneil06

She wanted to talk about my taste, have you tried a lemonshake??

raydise

Because we accidentally put on each other's glasses and said "woah!"

Lemonshake

The look of horror when he put the right glasses on

slimgirljo15

I accidentally broke his glasses

abbylisious

She wouldn't let me wear heels to bed.

Lemonshake

Her stilettos broke the water bed

abbylisious

She wouldn't let me do CPR on her in the water bed!

DWBalboa

Because she kept practicing CPR on me on the water bed! She knows I get seasick!

slimgirljo15

He broke our waterbed...riding the waves with another girl

DWBalboa

But baby, see what had happened was……. ;-)

Lemonshake

Spun one too many stories.

DWBalboa

She didn't like story time.

Lemonshake

Those stories put me to sleep

slimgirljo15

I found the neighbours wife hiding in our closet

Lemonshake

She found the skeleton in my closet

DWBalboa

I thought that was the purpose? Oh, you wanted the other kind of stories.

slimgirljo15

I asked for hot stories...he told me about a house fire....not what i wanted

DWBalboa

She didn't like my fiery stories.

slimgirljo15

All story no action ...

DWBalboa

She was too hard on me.

kjm3579

She was into too many "hard things", besides me

crawfzilla

I accidentally sent a picture of my dick to all of our contacts, and spent our life savings on the stamps.

Spnneil06

My mom was on his contact list, now they are dating!

kjm3579

She wanted to have a 3some with her mom

Spnneil06

He lied alot, made crazy accusations.

vadersaysno

she was too pretty for me

kjm3579

Caught him in bed with @Spnneil06 and her mom

Spnneil06

He had bizarre fantasies about me and my mom.

gfox1966

She was literally to hot to handle!!!