This will probably start a firestorm.

Mrsallypants

Didn't the divorce rates begin to skyrocket with no fault divorce? I can imagine why women would initiate divorce more as there are more rewards for it than a man initiating one.

I think men have always had the burden of being protector and provider of his wife and family. A man's self-worth is tied to his ability to provide, it's been instilled in him from time immemorial (e.g. "deadbeat dad" in the absence of paying child support when he can't find a job in a bad economy). I don't see many women attracted to men who do not offer the ability to provide, i.e. with their wealth, potential for wealth, good job, education, etc...

I imagine in a marriage where the male is the house husband the wife would go for the jugular every argument they have and emasculate him further by pointing out that he isn't providing and therefore less of a man.

Mrsallypants

Stay at home dads may be the majority of men in the future if their college rates keep declining like they are now, yet fewer and fewer men are marrying these days.

Aviendha_RJ

I imagine in a marriage where the male is the house husband the wife would go for the jugular every argument they have and emasculate him further by pointing out that he isn't providing and therefore less of a man.

That didn't really happen in my house, and my Mom was the bread-winner.

I don't know anything about divorce, but my parents had FOUR FIGHTS in their entire 29 year marriage, which was a happy one until the day my mother died in 2005. My father is now happily retired, and remarried.

As for your "emasculation" comment... I don't know about that. I say a bad marriage, is a bad marriage, is a bad marriage. Some people just don't belong together, and if the person that you are with doesn't treat you properly, you DON'T belong with that person. Life is too short to be unhappy---as a former banker i know that the thing most people argue about is money---but still, if you're with someone who throws your earning potential, past mistakes, family background, or friend selections around as an insult instead of supporting you with your choices, and believing in you as an individual... you really shouldn't be with that person.

And don't tell me I'm naïeve... I'm not. I grew up in a household where my parents loved and supported each other no matter what and didn't fight over who makes how much... and as an adult, I live in ANOTHER household where the same is true.

Ed98043

I imagine in a marriage where the male is the house husband the wife would go for the jugular every argument they have and emasculate him further by pointing out that he isn't providing and therefore less of a man.

Because husbands haven't been using their financial clout to keep their wives quiet and in the kitchen since time immemorial...

But the house-husband scenario is rare. The vast majority of marriages where the woman works, the man works too. The question is whether working women are destroying the fabric of society by not marrying at all, and/or by initiating divorce more often, and/or by emasculating men. I'm gonna say that working women are in fact *changing* the fabric of society, not destroying it. And change is hard for some people, especially those that have benefited most from the old ways.

Athena53

just comment to say that my husband just informed me as he was taking his women's studies midterm that women didn't burn their bras as much as the media said they did in the 70s. whaaaat

Pretty much true. It happened in a few places and of course the media made a big thing out of it. It was more titillating (pardon the pun) than all the other stuff going on that day so of course it got prominent treatment. I tried going without a bra for a few days. The girls started to hurt even though I'm not generously-sized. That told me that ligaments and tendons might be stretching and if I didn't put my bra back on I'd end up looking like one of those African ladies in National Geographic. I put it back on.

I did, however, devour the feminist literature and choose a non-traditional major in college (Math) and went into a field that had very few females at the time (I'm an actuary). I owe my life and my sanity to the feminists- I would have been a miserable traditional housewife. It's not for everyone.

I like to think that more opportunities for women have been good for men. Some can be househusbands. My sister the doctor has one and they've been happily married for 35 years. I have one- he's 15 years older than I am and doesn't need to worry about making a living at age 74 because I'm still working. He takes care of everything else and it's wonderful. Men who are called to low-paying professions (social work, for example) don't need to struggle to support a family on that income if they marry someone making more. Men don't need to live in terror of losing their job if there's another healthy income and health insurance available through the wife. After my divorce, my son and I did not live in abject poverty despite no child support. I put a roof over his head, paid for him to attend a private boarding school, and then paid his way through college, including a couple of Spring Break trips to Europe. He's employed at a good job and just married a wonderful young woman.

Yes, there are men who will get lost in this. Jobs that require only a strong back are getting scarcer and don't pay as well. The workplace is a bit more Darwinian because guys who might have been able to slide by in the 1950s will get edged out by women who are more motivated. And, yeah, you can't get away with slapping your wife around to keep her under control. If that was your idea of a relationship, sorry, you'll have a harder time finding someone who will put up with that just 'cause you have a paying job.

I wouldn't go back to the 1950s for anything. Sure, some stuff worked well. But a lot didn't.

I imagine in a marriage where the male is the house husband the wife would go for the jugular every argument they have and emasculate him further by pointing out that he isn't providing and therefore less of a man.

Huh? Is that all men are good for- a meal ticket? I love and respect my husband for far more than his pecuniary value.

thinbitch63

That's just BULL%*#$, my husband through no fault of his own is now disabled and can't work But I can and do, never in my wildest dreams would I throw that in his face or blame him when money is tight. In truth I feel guilty that I don't have a second job! My kids need there mom too so we learned to do without and we move on. I have to say that there are alot of things in our world that are contributing to this decline...should we start with technology and how our younger generation no longer knows how to have a face to face conversation! Let's not bash the sexes or blame each other, let's put our heads together and find mutually satisfying solutions. Lets just agree that what is right for your may not be right for me,what works for you does not work for me!
Keep in mind that you are limited in your own belief in the stereotypes you are spouting and are really missing out on someone who will be the difference in your life!! We all need to talk less and learn to trust abit more, striped down naked WE ARE ALL THE SAME and you are beating your gums and keyboards when you could be doing something to change all of this!

ladymiseryali

Turn off Fox News?

Umm actually Megyn Kelly did an awesome job of refuting the hypothesis, and she is on Fox.

So a Stepfox Wife was able to override her programming? Maybe there is hope after all......

EvgeniZyntx

I don't often post and then only about weight loss issues. Recent comments, by people in the media that women working (and making more than their spouse) is the cause of the disintegration of marriage and family in America, just pissed me off. In the 70's, I burned my bra and protested for women's rights. Now I wonder why I bothered. I served in the military when it wasn't done. I worked my way through school to get a career. I had 4 children, none of whom ever saw one day of daycare, (please, this is NOT to disparage anyone who needs this service). They are all adult productive members of society now. I have been married to the same man for 43 years. How does any of this destroy the fabric of marriage & family in America? Why do we tolerate ignorant people like this that want women back in the dark ages? Sorry, just had to rant on this one.

Because what is the alternative to tolerating them? I may not agree with them but I don't want to live in a country where we do something besides tolerate them.

Well, ridicule is always a useful tool.

InnerConflict

Stop the whining and MAKE ME MY SAMMICH! :mad:

Laces_0ut

any man who has an issue with his wife making more money than him is not a man. he's an insecure fool.

DancesWithDogz

Please stop watching FOX news - they are awful media sources

TX_Aggie_Dad

I thought MFP was the cause in the rise in the divorce rate.

sem41278

Pretty sure my husband would jump for joy if I made more then him. He'd have no problem spending it either lol.

madmiya

I thought MFP was the cause in the rise in the divorce rate.

only if you stopped cooking deliciously decadent meals because you're new online buddies think you should eat healthy..

wild_wild_life

I haven't read the stories, but do they say specifically that men initiate the divorce because they hate that their wives are more intelligent/hardworking/rich than they are? It could easily be a woman who works her butt off to support a lazy husband, then divorces him because she's in a horrible marriage. Again, I haven't read the stories, but it looks like just a statistic without much reasoning behind it. It may not be what you are reading on the surface.

Not at all, the story is just that more women are the primary breadwinner for their families and some reactive news commentators are saying its the fall of civilization. It's a non-issue.

SusanMcAvoy

I agree with many of the other posts. Please stop watching FOX news.

madmiya

I agree with many of the other posts. Please stop watching FOX news.

they all sort of suck. watch a little of whatever, draw your own conclusions and then turn it off. it's just a repeating frenzy to work us up into panic and rash consumerism. tv makes me hungry and moody.. unless it's sherlock. you dont want to know what clever men do for me. rowr.

LMT2012

Women are harder on other women for their choices than men ever could be. Women's liberation is about respecting and supporting the choices of other women, even when they differ from your own path. We have not achieved this.

BadKnee150

I have a stay at home husband. No kids. We did this so we can travel on my days off (I have a very gernerous vacation allowance & he had only 2 weeks). He's a strong guy, when we married, he even offered to flip a coin to decide who's last name we kept (ie. If I won, he would take my last name).

When he quit his job, we had no problems with it. You know who has made the "stay-at-home" husband thing so hard. EVERYBODY ELSE!! We are happily married, but I can't count the number of snide remarks made to him or me that basicly degrade my husbands contribution to our life & family. That has worn on him alot. When you hear it enough times that you have to be worthless becouse your a "stay-at-home husband", it starts wearing on your confidence.

Women making more than men is not the problem, it's society who tells a guy that he has to support his family to be worthwhile is the problem. My husband is such an asset to me but very few people acknolodge that. I dont deal with anything financial (other than a quick review), I don't deal with our rental house (which was my personal house before we got married & then couldn't sell so we are not happy about being land lords), I don't deal with the bee's that have infested our wall in our new house that we have to hire contractors to tear down part of our house for, I didn't re-paint our kitchen when I wanted it a new color, I don't know where our mailbox is located, I don't babysit my sister youngest on thursday so she can take her oldest to swim lessons, and most of all, I only cook when I want too. But alot of people makes snide remarks & makes him feel worthless.

Mlkmaid

And the real burner is that the people who report these stories are savvy media types (read wealthy) who probably have wives who also have fancy careers, meaning they probably have NANNIES! LOL.