RillaVanilla's 125 lb loss thread

IslandSneezerooo

Here's some backstory... I was a slim child, so my mom freaked out after I had a massive growth spurt when I turned 13 and hit puberty, and started taking me to WW. I did NOT need to be on a diet. I was 5'4", big chested, and a healthy 130-140 lbs.

My mom died of cancer when I was 22 years old and I ate my emotions and stress, gaining 90 lbs in a year. After that awful year I managed to maintain my weight around 230 lbs by going on diets, losing 10-15 lbs, going off the diet, regaining 10-15 lbs, rinse and repeat. I had a baby when I was 27 years old, but only gained 17 lbs, and was 225 lbs the week after he was born.

At age 30 I wanted to have another baby but couldn't get pregnant, so I started seeing a fertility specialist for PCOS and was put on metformin for a year. I gained 50 lbs and it made me really ill. I went off the metformin and have been maintaining (for the most part) at 280-290 doing my usual diet yo-yo game.

I turned 38 years old last year, and REALLY started feeling the effect of my weight more. An old SI joint injury from my mid 20's would flare up a couple times a year, but after alternating ice/heat and seeing my chiro, I'd be back to normal in a couple days. Last year I had flare up after flare up, and they started lasting longer and longer, basically making me an invalid until the inflammation went down. That freaked me out a LOT as my mobility is something I cherish more than anything.

On November 9th my MD referred me to a bariatric surgeon.

On Jan 22nd I had my first consult with my surgeon (weighed in at 295 lbs) and he has referred me to his team at their bariatric clinic for pre-op tests and a dietician consult. I'm currently waiting for a date for a group orientation. I was told that it takes about a year here (Vancouver Island, BC, Canada) to get a surgery date.

January 23rd I decided I wasn't going to mess around anymore, I'd get serious about eating less and moving more, and see how much I could lose on my own over the next year. My ultimate dream would be to lose so much I won't even need the surgery anymore... I immediately started logging on MFP. For the first few days I logged what I normally eat to get an idea where I was starting. I averaged about 3000 calories/day and zero exercise.

For the first couple weeks I aimed for 2000 calories/day but struggled a lot with hunger and cravings and most days I was well over 2500 cals/day still. I'm in my third week now, I've found my stride, and for the past 9 days I've easily stayed below 1960 calories/day, and exercised daily.

Because of my hip/back issues, I'm easing into exercise VERY slowly as I have a tendency to over do it and not be able to do anything for weeks after while dealing with painful back and hip muscle spasms. I started with 5 min/day yoga... then the second week I did 6 min/day... this week I'm up to 7 min/day, and I've added in a stationary deskcycle bike. I'm able to do 10 min of yoga and I even did one 30 min session on the bike too! I aim for a MINIMUM 7 min/day but if I am feeling good and want to keep going, I do. Each week I'll keep adding a minute till I'm up to an hour of exercise every day.

I'm also planning to reduce my calories by 20 cals/day each week until I'm down to around 1500 calories/day.

I've set my goal at 170 lbs (gets my BMI below 30), so that's 125 lbs to lose. I'm down 4.5 lbs so far as of last Sunday and my mantra is: Motivation comes from ACTION, not the other way around!

I'd love some support from others who have a lot to lose, and if anyone wants to post how they are doing on this thread, I'd love to hear your story and progress reports. I've been blogging, but find it's a lonely place with very little interaction, so thought I'd poke my toe in the water here. Be kind please, I'm a gentle introvert who spooks easy!

sofaking6

Heya! Welcome and just thought I would mention that I have seen a couplefew threads from folks in your same boat looking for friends and support so if you look around in the forums you should find them.

physicalintel

Keep on trucking my sister and you will reach the promise land

IslandSneezerooo

sofaking6 wrote: »

Heya! Welcome and just thought I would mention that I have seen a couplefew threads from folks in your same boat looking for friends and support so if you look around in the forums you should find them.

Thanks, I have done that, but didn't want to hijack any threads, so thought I'd start my own, and also have a place to post thoughts and progress as I go...

physicalintel wrote: »

Keep on trucking my sister and you will reach the promise land

Thanks!

obscuremusicreference

You can do it! Congrats on your loss to date.

dangie2002

Hi! I have been on a weight loss journey for 2 years. I've lost 83# and have a 105# to go. I have PCOS. I am willing cheer you on your journey!!

The most important thing I have learned, it this isn't a diet or a quick fix. This is it....for life! I have to exercise all my life, not just to get healthy. I have to eat healthy every day, not just to drop the weight. Its been a good journey with ups and downs. I've learned a lot so far.

dangie2002

Congratulations on the 4.5# loss, that is an AWESOME start!!!

dblst10

It's gonna feel easier to do as you get better at it. Don't give up during plateaus! You can make your dream come true!

IslandSneezerooo

Yesterday was challenging. Raging PMS is often my undoing when I'm trying to lose weight. Seven minutes on the desk cycle hurt bad and felt like it was never going to end, and hunger was off the bar. I REALLY wanted some cherry ice cream but I knew there was no way I could fit it in. It was the end of the day, had just over 100 calories left, was already over my fat goal, and there was no way I had the energy or strength (back was hurting) to burn anymore on the bike. I am on a "green streak" with staying under my calorie goal, and I didn't want to lose that. Plus I just made my food diary public yesterday.

Instead I had peppermint tea and drank some water. Not gonna lie, it DID not hit the spot. What did hit the spot though was waking up this morning knowing I stayed strong and pushed through. (Sorry for the tmi) TOM (aka time of month) is due this weekend so the hormonal agony should hopefully end soon!!

IslandSneezerooo

NSVs I'm SERIOUSLY looking forward to as I lose weight (thoughts after having a shower):

• Clipping my toes nails without having to grunt and strain and contort.
• Putting my socks on without having to sit down, heave my foot up on the other leg, then drag my foot close enough to me to get my sock on by pulling on the bottom of my pant leg.
• Putting my shoes on without doing painful contortions of the body or moving my stomach fat out of the way so I can bend over.
• Wiping my *kitten* without painful contortions of the body.
• A normal size towel wrapping all the way around me.
• Having more than one pair of pants that are comfortable to wear.
• Not constantly tugging at my shirt to make sure it's covering my fat rolls and my skin isn't showing.
• Walking around the house without shoes on without my ankles and feet killing within minutes.
• Cleaning my bathtub/shower without needing pain killers after.
• Clothes that fit well and look nice.

Yes, I am currently dealing with all of those things. It's not fun.

IslandSneezerooo

dangie2002 wrote: »

Hi! I have been on a weight loss journey for 2 years. I've lost 83# and have a 105# to go. I have PCOS. I am willing cheer you on your journey!!

The most important thing I have learned, it this isn't a diet or a quick fix. This is it....for life! I have to exercise all my life, not just to get healthy. I have to eat healthy every day, not just to drop the weight. Its been a good journey with ups and downs. I've learned a lot so far.

Well done! The most I've ever lost on a diet was less than 45 lbs and I quickly regained it when I tried to eat "normal". This time I'm eating "normal" and hoping to lose weight by decreasing portions and moving more... Haven't been entirely convinced it will work for someone with PCOS, but then again I've never stuck with anything long enough to find out! LOL

IslandSneezerooo

dblst10 wrote: »

It's gonna feel easier to do as you get better at it. Don't give up during plateaus! You can make your dream come true!

That will definitely be the key for me... The last two weeks have been less than encouraging. I lost 6.2 lbs the first week, then gained 2 lbs, then lost 0.3 lbs last week... That's still 4.5 lbs down, but I have to admit that doesn't feel great to see those kinds of numbers when you're working hard at making changes.

IslandSneezerooo

obscuremusicreference wrote: »

You can do it! Congrats on your loss to date.

Thanks!

Bustergirl14

Keep up the good work. Having that conversation with yourself about the ice cream was a smart thing to do. I have the conversation with myself daily but I am finding that it becomes easier with time. The weight will come off and that will motivate you to continue to lose. I've gotten closer to some of your goals - socks and shoes are much easier to put on now. Got into some pants that I haven't been able to button for a loooooong time. Felt really good which is more motivation. There is no magic or instant weight loss, it does take time but it is sooooo worth it.

IslandSneezerooo

Bustergirl14 wrote: »

Keep up the good work. Having that conversation with yourself about the ice cream was a smart thing to do. I have the conversation with myself daily but I am finding that it becomes easier with time. The weight will come off and that will motivate you to continue to lose. I've gotten closer to some of your goals - socks and shoes are much easier to put on now. Got into some pants that I haven't been able to button for a loooooong time. Felt really good which is more motivation. There is no magic or instant weight loss, it does take time but it is sooooo worth it.

Oooh... I can't WAIT! This time I'm trying to care more and remind myself that being fat DOES have disadvantages, and try not to talk myself into continuing to be complacent about it all.

IslandSneezerooo

I'm going back to daily weigh ins starting tomorrow. I like seeing the ups and downs through the week, I'm finding waiting till Monday is agonizing, especially if all I see is a gain or very very small loss for a week's efforts.

IslandSneezerooo

Was still craving cherry ice cream yesterday so fit it into my calories last night and don't mind saying it TOTALLY hit the spot. I spent way too many years fighting "bad" foods and depriving myself until I couldn't take it anymore and "cheating". There's no such thing as "cheating" or "bad food" in my vocabulary anymore. This is my LIFE, not a short term diet that will end and then let me overeat all I want...

Also, yesterday was a 7 day streak of doing at least 7 minutes exercise, and staying under my net calorie goal. Weighed in this morning and I'm down another 1.6 lbs since last Sunday. YES!!

mcclelland0484

I looked into the surgery option when I reached 365 lbs. The surgery just removes the sensation of hunger but it does it at a great cost. Side effects are endless. My mother had a bypass 7 years ago. Lost weight. Then regained it. Sometime in between she had heart issues (unrelated). She could not utilize the standard treatment because she was unable to absorb medicine due to the previous surgery. I have lost 130lbs in a year, doing exactly what you are doing now. Side effect of dieting is hunger. The side effect of bypass surgery could be death. I'd rather be hungery.

IslandSneezerooo

@mcclelland0484 Congrats on getting the weight off.

IslandSneezerooo

Gorgeous sunny day today, so I had to get out of the house for today's exercise... less than a month ago there's no way I would have even considered going for a walk, no matter what the weather. Now THAT is real progress! My hips are still REALLY tight sometimes when I walk, gonna have to google some SI joint pre-exercise stretches to help with that... If you know of any that might help, I'd love to hear about them...

Today is Valentine's day (happy Valentine's day everyone reading!!), and I'm navigating a lot of food today. My husband made his infamous Kahlua cheesecake (my all time faourite dessert) to take for dessert after dinner at my Uncle's place tonight, and my uncle is making his infamous cheesy meat lasagna. Instead of just holiday overeating, I entered the ingredients into the recipe builder and I'm planning for it, working it into my calories/macros for the day. The hubs also gave me an After 8 chocolate bar with his card this morning, actually 2, but I'm regifting one of them back to him... Worked that chocolate into the day too! Had a nice big filling salad with tuna for lunch and feeling GREAT!

catmckinley

Hey congrazts!!! It is not easy. I should know. I was a slim child too. I gain my weight after having 2 kids then an hysterectomy. I started my diet Jan. 26, 2015 weighting at 120 pounds. Today I weight 199. That's 11 pounds lost & I went from a 1x dress size to a 14. So keep up the good work & good luck to you.

Sugarnspice1922

Your getting it done feel free to add me

IslandSneezerooo

@catmckinley Well done! Congrats on reaching onederland.

@sugarnspice1922 Thanks, will do! I'm always up for more friends.

hippygirl325

RillaVanilla wrote: »

NSVs I'm SERIOUSLY looking forward to as I lose weight (thoughts after having a shower):

• Clipping my toes nails without having to grunt and strain and contort.
• Putting my socks on without having to sit down, heave my foot up on the other leg, then drag my foot close enough to me to get my sock on by pulling on the bottom of my pant leg.
• Putting my shoes on without doing painful contortions of the body or moving my stomach fat out of the way so I can bend over.
• Wiping my *kitten* without painful contortions of the body.
• A normal size towel wrapping all the way around me.
• Having more than one pair of pants that are comfortable to wear.
• Not constantly tugging at my shirt to make sure it's covering my fat rolls and my skin isn't showing.
• Walking around the house without shoes on without my ankles and feet killing within minutes.
• Cleaning my bathtub/shower without needing pain killers after.
• Clothes that fit well and look nice.

Yes, I am currently dealing with all of those things. It's not fun.

I can completely relate to all of that and I feel the same! I'm 5'7 1/2, started at 275 lbs, now down to 246 since Dec 22nd. I have made a lot of progress just by changing my eating habits and overhauling my diet. I went low carb, and that for me personally has made all the difference. Cutting out all the sugar and junk food along with starchy foods has made a big difference in my bloating. I never feel bloated anymore. I feel a lot more energy as well. I'm hoping that by my birthday on March 25th I'll have lost close to 50 lbs. Maybe I'll post a progress pic in here later.

Some of my own NSVs that I'm particularly looking foward to:

-Sitting comfortably on my boyfriend's lap
-Being able to walk around in high heels
-Having an easier time of shaving
-Being able to cross my legs
-Wearing cute little dresses
-Not getting out of breath walking up a hill or stairs
-Being able to get up from a sitting position with barely any effort
-Eventually getting pregnant and having a healthy low risk pregnancy

ladydianna62

I'm in the same boat as you I went thru a terrible divorce and had a brother and a sister die in same day from different things and I just ate myself into oblivion
Really glad I found this. Thread it always nice to walk with someone on Sam journeyas yyou nice weight lost so far

IslandSneezerooo

ladydianna62 wrote: »

I'm in the same boat as you I went thru a terrible divorce and had a brother and a sister die in same day from different things and I just ate myself into oblivion
Really glad I found this. Thread it always nice to walk with someone on Sam journeyas yyou nice weight lost so far

We have more in common than you realize! I didn't mention my abusive first marriage and divorce, 3 years of single parenting, etc because my weight didn't fluctuate much in that time... I was so relieved and happy to be free after six years of hell that I didn't gain a lot of weight.

Fortunately I met the love of my life 9 years ago, he adopted my son, and we have been blissfully married for almost 7 years now. Our happy life deserves a healthy fit wife!!

Jump on board, we can support each other in making good choices...

IslandSneezerooo

hippygirl325 wrote: »

I can completely relate to all of that and I feel the same! I'm 5'7 1/2, started at 275 lbs, now down to 246 since Dec 22nd. I have made a lot of progress just by changing my eating habits and overhauling my diet. I went low carb, and that for me personally has made all the difference. Cutting out all the sugar and junk food along with starchy foods has made a big difference in my bloating. I never feel bloated anymore. I feel a lot more energy as well. I'm hoping that by my birthday on March 25th I'll have lost close to 50 lbs. Maybe I'll post a progress pic in here later.

Some of my own NSVs that I'm particularly looking foward to:

-Sitting comfortably on my boyfriend's lap
-Being able to walk around in high heels
-Having an easier time of shaving
-Being able to cross my legs
-Wearing cute little dresses
-Not getting out of breath walking up a hill or stairs
-Being able to get up from a sitting position with barely any effort
-Eventually getting pregnant and having a healthy low risk pregnancy

@hippygirl325 You might be wheat sensitive. I know once I cut out wheat and some other foods I'm allergic to (soy, whey, nuts, bananas, etc...) a number of years ago my bloating was completely gone and I felt a LOT better.

Those are great NSVs to aim for! I'm 38 years old and done having babies now myself, but I had a LOT of fertility issues and losing weight certainly helps.

Cheering you on for your birthday goal! You can do it... Feel free to post your progress on this thread (goes for anyone wanting more support).

IslandSneezerooo

Oh Lordie! New developments!! We're taking a road trip back to my home town the first week of September. My husband and son will be meeting my childhood friends for the first time, and many of them haven't seen me in a few years, some in a LOT of years (I moved away 15 years ago). We'll be staying with my brother and his family, and doing lots of walking and sightseeing showing my hubs and son all my old haunts... I'd love to lose a lot of weight between now and then so just trying to figure out what would be reasonable... It's ~ 28 weeks away, so trying to figure out what I could reasonably lose between now and then...

This morning I was 289 lbs... I think I could lose at least 40 lbs and be in the 240's by September 1st, an average of 1.4 lbs/week... I'd have to drop my daily calories from 1980/day to 1720/day. I think I'm ready to take it to the next level?! I've eased into these new habits for the last three weeks and I'm feeling good... If I find I'm too hungry to bear it, I can have the odd 1980 day (that's my setting for losing 1 lb/week) and still have a good loss. I don't know... What do you think? Am I setting myself up for failure? Or giving myself a kickass challenge that's going to take it up a notch and further motivate me?

IslandSneezerooo

PCOS + TOM (aka Time Of Month) is a *kitten* combo. He's due to show up today, but instead he dropped off his friends Zit and Bloat for a visit in his absence. I know I said I want to weigh everyday, but until TOM has been and gone, the scale is on sabbatical. LOL

IslandSneezerooo

Weekends at our house are food prep time for the upcoming week. I have a pan of chicken veg fajita filling baking in the oven right now to eat mixed with organic spring mix greens & spinach, cheese, salsa and sour cream. When that's done I'll bake a package of all natural bacon to have with eggs or crumbled on other salads. For snacks I have stocked up on greek yogourt, organic cheese, and natural pepperoni. For fruit I have some canned pineapple chunks and frozen fruit cause there isn't much fresh in season at the moment, at least not for a reasonable price. When the fajita mix is gone I have other salad ingredients like tuna (I mix it up with unsweetened relish, caesar dressing and red onion), or feta, bacon, bell peppers, red onion, and pumpkin seeds in a green salad.

I'm leaving my macros to what MFP sets them at for the time being, but most days I'm well over the protein and fat goals, and well under the carbs, which is perfect for someone like me who has PCOS and insulin resistance.

Exercise wise I'm taking a break from the walking and biking because my hips and lower back are very tight and hurting a lot. Instead I put on my HeavyWeight Yoga 3 DVD and did the bed top session today. If you are quite obese like me (high 200's or 300's), Abby Lentz has some AMAZING yoga dvds customized for large figures. I have all three and I LOVE them. Highly recommend googling them and checking them out, great help in easing into a more active lifestyle.

IslandSneezerooo

Down another pound this morning for a total of 2.6 for the week. I can't make up my mind if I should weigh daily or weekly... I like having a weekly total... But I'm SO curious the rest of the week! LOL

I'm pretty stoked about losing so much during a week that normally I would gain at least that much from fast food on a road trip, and eating out a lot while I have family visiting. My hubs made a comment this morning about "and you ate all that junk too!". I was like "what junk?", he said, "Oh you know, cheesecake, lasagna, chocolate from Valentine's day..." I told him I worked it all into my plan and don't consider any of it junk. There were no "bad foods", I worked it all into my calories for the day and didn't go over my net calorie goals a single time. Plus I exercised every single day this week.

Honestly? It wasn't painful to do AT ALL. It felt like living "normal life", except I was planning ahead of time what I was going to eat (when I could), or doing extra exercise for when I needed extra calories.