Your tricks to 'embrace' the pain of your lifestyle changes?
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CathyGillis wrote: »The negativity toward the original post is so disappointing. People share their feelings on here for support. Saying things like "I don't have any pain" is not helpful. OF COURSE people are going to experience pain or discomfort when they are making changes in their lifestyle.
People aren't being negative...they are simply pointing out that this doesn't have to be painful. As I stated in an earlier post, much of this "pain" is due to people being in a hurry...they just want to be "done". When they realize they are never truly "done" and that betterment of one's self is a life long endeavor...well, this realization offers freedom...it enables you to be ok with a smaller but more manageable deficit for example...what's the rush?0 -
But don't you ever just NOT WANT TO? I don't know how else to put it. I want a bagel for breakfast, pizza for lunch and pasta for dinner, and no, that absolutely will not fit my macros based on the amount of each type I will eat, with dessert to follow. It's not that those of us struggling don't have the knowledge on how to make this weight loss thing happen. I do want to lose weight and be healthy and all that jazz, but when I'm asking myself "what do I want for dinner tonight?" the answer will never be something that makes this whole thing easy.
For me, the answer is usually something that makes this whole thing easy--I really enjoy how I eat, and if anyone doesn't I think that's something to work on. But of course sometimes I just don't want to. I want to eat whatever I want and not care. I agree that's the hard part. But it's part in the way that being an adult is hard and lots of things we want to do are trade offs vs. something that might, in the moment, be more fun/pleasant.
Doesn't make it not a thing to commiserate about, IMO.
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The eating part isn't really hard. I am at 1320 calories and don't usually eat back my exercise calories. I'm rarely starving.
The exercise part is what is hard. I'm a busy working full time mom to 3 kids. Two of the kids have special needs. I don't get home from work until 6pm and have to make dinner and do homework and baths and bedtime routines before I can get to the gym. It's often 9 or 10 by then. And snowy and cold. I get through it by reminding myself why it is worth it. Sometimes I negotiate and tell myself to just commit to 30 minutes because that is better than nothing. Once I get there I usually end up doing the full hour. It's a daily battle but I have made it 42 out of the last 50 days.
Good for you! This is awesome - keep it up! You are an inspiration.0 -
I am very jealous that so many MFP members find it so "easy" to make the right choices. I understand that the right choices are not complicated, as many of you have so often pointed out - just make a small deficit, make the cookie fit your macros, eat more protein, and so on.
But don't you ever just NOT WANT TO? I don't know how else to put it. I want a bagel for breakfast, pizza for lunch and pasta for dinner, and no, that absolutely will not fit my macros based on the amount of each type I will eat, with dessert to follow. It's not that those of us struggling don't have the knowledge on how to make this weight loss thing happen. I do want to lose weight and be healthy and all that jazz, but when I'm asking myself "what do I want for dinner tonight?" the answer will never be something that makes this whole thing easy.
This is why I pre-log my days, usually. If there is something I really want (like pizza), I log it in the morning, and plan the rest of my day around it.
Alternatively you can go over occasionally. Or take a day off once a month. Or add in some extra exercise for the week. Or track calories on a weekly basis, eat less during the week and have a day where you eat your banked calories.
It IS easy, once you find the method that works for you (that's the hard part).
And of course some days I just don't want to. Those days I usually just look at my starting photos and photos of myself now. It works.0 -
CathyGillis wrote: »The negativity toward the original post is so disappointing. People share their feelings on here for support. Saying things like "I don't have any pain" is not helpful. OF COURSE people are going to experience pain or discomfort when they are making changes in their lifestyle.
ummm no, the point that us "negative" people are making is that losing weight does not equal self torture, aka pain.
You can eat in a moderate deficit, hit your calorie/micro/macro goals, eat the foods you like, and exercise moderately and you will lose weight and reach your fitness goals...
the problem is when people equate dieting with having to cut out whole food groups, train seven days a week, two times a day, and think that they have to eat 1200 calories a day while training to excess...
"UUmmm yes". Some people get quite strong hunger pains on a 250kcal/day deficit. I know because I do. I eat healthy, quality foods, high protein and fat, but I still get them. Some people do. Some people are different than you. So by your own admission, you are not qualified to advise on how to deal with these pains.
I would suggest playing with your meal pattern. E.g. if you eat 4 x 500kcal meals a day, try changing the timings if possible, or maybe 5 x 400kcals a day etc. I helps for me, a bit. I was never hungry in the morning so I just skip breakfast and my first meal is my Pre-WO at 10am. I can then use those calories later in the day. Eating the same amount of calories but I get less hunger pains.
ohhhhh really??
so because I do not equate weight loss with "pain" that makes me unqualified to comment?
what are your qualifications? The fact that a 250 calorie deficit gives you hunger pains makes you an expert, really?
how many calories a day are you consuming?
No, if you never get hunger pains when you're eating a deficit, you can't advise the OP on how to embrace or deal with these pains. Simple.
I don't need advice from you, thanks. I know my body very well at this stage, and can plan my weight loss and gain quite effectively. That is not the issue here. Some people get hunger pains, if you don't good for you. We do, and it's good to have strategies to reduce or deal with them.
so you have no qualifications...
understood.0 -
I am very jealous that so many MFP members find it so "easy" to make the right choices. I understand that the right choices are not complicated, as many of you have so often pointed out - just make a small deficit, make the cookie fit your macros, eat more protein, and so on.
But don't you ever just NOT WANT TO? I don't know how else to put it. I want a bagel for breakfast, pizza for lunch and pasta for dinner, and no, that absolutely will not fit my macros based on the amount of each type I will eat, with dessert to follow. It's not that those of us struggling don't have the knowledge on how to make this weight loss thing happen. I do want to lose weight and be healthy and all that jazz, but when I'm asking myself "what do I want for dinner tonight?" the answer will never be something that makes this whole thing easy.
I personally wouldn't concern myself with macros right off the bat...focus on calories first and you can worry about macros down the road...or not.
Learning portion control and decision making is part of the process that I was talking about earlier. Allow for the process.
Also, what I do is allow myself "pizza night"...it used to be once per week, now it's more like twice per month.
I had pasta last night, but instead of just one big helping of pasta I had spaghetti with some marinara as a side dish...I weighed out a serving of dry spaghetti and cooked it and served it as a side with some chicken I had marinated in an Italian vinegar and oil and herb blend I concocted and I served with some roasted veggies.
"Treats" like bagels and whatnot I allot for on weekends...I always have a big ride on Sunday with my coach and the group and a bagel is a perfect pre-ride meal for example.
It takes time to work these things in...you have to allow for baby steps and you have to allow time for the process...you can't expect to do a 180* overnight and that's where most people go wrong.
I would add to this that "healthful" foods don't have to be boring and bland either...as a foodie it makes me sad that so many people think "healthy" just means sucking on salads and celery sticks. As an example, tonight I'm grilling up a 6 oz trimmed beef filet and baking a sweet potato...I will likely serve this with some sauteed asparagus and I will enjoy a glass of wine. It will be delicious and come in somewhere between 500 - 600 calories...a huge protein bang...lots of potassium and other minerals...good dose of fiber and lots of other micro nutrients.0 -
"It IS easy, once you find the method that works for you (that's the hard part)."
This is basically the key to this whole thread: it's the experimenting and time used in the trial and error process that sucks. We make some progress, then backslide. Think something works, then something changes. BUT, when we finally find our own individual strategy it finally becomes easy. "Easy" being relative. There are still good days and bad, but at least we have the knowledge of what it takes to succeed and will use it the majority of the time.0 -
I am very jealous that so many MFP members find it so "easy" to make the right choices. I understand that the right choices are not complicated, as many of you have so often pointed out - just make a small deficit, make the cookie fit your macros, eat more protein, and so on.
But don't you ever just NOT WANT TO? I don't know how else to put it. I want a bagel for breakfast, pizza for lunch and pasta for dinner, and no, that absolutely will not fit my macros based on the amount of each type I will eat, with dessert to follow. It's not that those of us struggling don't have the knowledge on how to make this weight loss thing happen. I do want to lose weight and be healthy and all that jazz, but when I'm asking myself "what do I want for dinner tonight?" the answer will never be something that makes this whole thing easy.
when I want those things I log them into my day and see how they fit. If I meet my calorie/micro/macro targets then I proceed to eat them; if I do not, then I readjust until I am near or at my goal.
Taking your example I may not be able to have a bagel, pizza, cookies, and ice cream fit into my day; but I can usually make two out of the four fit..so I will have a bagel with breakfast and some ice cram for dessert, or pizza for dinner, and a few cookies for dinner.
Also, as wolfman pointed out if you are primarily concerned with just fat loss then you do not need to hit your macros spot on.
Calorie deficit for weight loss
macro adherence for body composition ..
as you lose more weight and get closer to goal weight, then you will have to get tighter with logging and macros...
I would also add that if you do have an occasional blow out, it is no big deal as one day of being a 100 or 200 calories over is not going to ruin progress.
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Eat some celery and a few carrots and you wont feel hungry.0
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sansaeverdeen wrote: »Thanks for the responses everyone.
I feel hungry after eating, and that's with eating lots of fat, protein etc. I eat 2 boiled eggs per day to help curb the hunger.
I am doing IIFYM and am cutting 20-25%. I used to average 2300 calories a day (I'm 5'10, 27 y.o. female, and 197 lbs). On bad days I'd hit 2500 but rarely more than that unless I went to the Cheesecake Factory (once every five years).
I'm now eating 1800 and my energy levels have taken a serious hit. I think I'm supposed to just live with this but that is why I have come on here for commiseration and advice.
I also exercise and love the feeling of DOMs. I rest up, drink tonnes of water and can't wait to get back out there. My problem is I probably don't exercise enough. I only bike 15 miles a week (to and from school) and walk to the grocery store twice (5 miles per week). I haven't felt DOMs since doing P90x.
I weight like 38lbs less than you and I eat 350 more calories than you do, although my goals are now a 10% deficit. Even when I did a 20% deficit while at a lighter weight than you I was eating 2000 calories. I exercise 4-5x a week for about 4-5hrs a week total. Most of that is strength training. So.. yeah you're probably not eating enough if you are always hungry even after eating.
And you really should not be feeling DOMS all the time. I only feel them if I take a break or try new exercises. So I have some slight DOMS this week because I took last week off, but it's nothing major.0 -
CathyGillis wrote: »The negativity toward the original post is so disappointing. People share their feelings on here for support. Saying things like "I don't have any pain" is not helpful. OF COURSE people are going to experience pain or discomfort when they are making changes in their lifestyle.
Then why haven't most of us who responded felt this pain or discomfort? I felt no pain or discomfort when I cut out gluten, because cutting it out relieved pretty much all of my digestive issues. I did feel unhappy cutting out dairy before this, and since it didn't alleviate my symptoms I gladly started eating it again. I did not feel discomfort eating less food because I'm just... eating less food and it's still a very reasonable intake.0 -
CathyGillis wrote: »The negativity toward the original post is so disappointing. People share their feelings on here for support. Saying things like "I don't have any pain" is not helpful. OF COURSE people are going to experience pain or discomfort when they are making changes in their lifestyle.
ummm no, the point that us "negative" people are making is that losing weight does not equal self torture, aka pain.
You can eat in a moderate deficit, hit your calorie/micro/macro goals, eat the foods you like, and exercise moderately and you will lose weight and reach your fitness goals...
the problem is when people equate dieting with having to cut out whole food groups, train seven days a week, two times a day, and think that they have to eat 1200 calories a day while training to excess...
"UUmmm yes". Some people get quite strong hunger pains on a 250kcal/day deficit. I know because I do. I eat healthy, quality foods, high protein and fat, but I still get them. Some people do. Some people are different than you. So by your own admission, you are not qualified to advise on how to deal with these pains.
I would suggest playing with your meal pattern. E.g. if you eat 4 x 500kcal meals a day, try changing the timings if possible, or maybe 5 x 400kcals a day etc. I helps for me, a bit. I was never hungry in the morning so I just skip breakfast and my first meal is my Pre-WO at 10am. I can then use those calories later in the day. Eating the same amount of calories but I get less hunger pains.
And what is your estimated TDEE/maintenance, current caloric intake, and rate of weight loss? You can be at an estimated 10% deficit but in reality be at a 15 or 20% deficit because calculators are not always correct in their estimations for each person. It's all averages. And what about your macro breakdown - what is high protein and fat to you? I need at least 55g fat as a bare minimum, ideally in the 60s-70s to be happy; I weigh 158. I had a day eating 2500 calories, about 130g of protein, and only like 30-some grams of fat, the rest in carbs. I was STARVING. My workout sucked. I've not done another refeed since. I eat 130g of protein, I do not consider that high, but more so moderate. My fat is also not that high, it's about moderate.
But then again, maybe I don't feel hungry because I eat whatever I want while hitting protein needs. Chocolate can be quite filling when consumed as part of your breakfast.0 -
Thanks to the OP for bringing this up. When I first started MFP a couple of years ago I couldn't believe how easy it was. I was singing its praises to everyone and wondering how on earth anyone could be overweight when all you needed to do was count calories. But then something changed in me and I started feeling hungry all the time. Everyday was a struggle to meet the calories and the thought of having to live the rest of my life like this was so depressing. Its been like that now for the past year. I stop doing MFP gain a few kg, get back on it again, am hungry for months and then can't bare it any longer. Sometimes different things help, more aerobic excercise seems to curb my appetite sometimes, other times its more water or more protein, but none of these seem to stick and so while the first time i did this I sailed down to 65kg I've now been hovering around 70kg and can't seem to get anywhere with it all. Really it's that thought that this is going to be the rest of my life if I want to stay this weight that gets me..0
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The first step for me to healthy weight loss was to choose healthy foods, but delicious foods. I am a foodie. That is never going to change, nor do I want it to. So I will never be able to stick to celery sticks. I learned that eating healthy doesn't have to mean ticking off my taste buds.
I have played around and created some delicious recipes for myself: e.g. lean pork or chicken slow cooked with a little broth and mushrooms and cashews on top, with a side of brussel sprouts or steamed veggies. An orange. A hard boiled egg (no way I'd give up the egg yolk). Sometimes with rice. If it's dinner, finish off with a scoop of rich vanilla ice cream with just a touch of chocolate syrup on top. This is just one example.
I love KFC. I don't eat it every day or even every week, but when I feel like it, I eat it. I log it. But I eat it.
I have found that when I eat food I love, the cravings to binge go away. Also, I love filling foods: whether it's a low calorie cucumber or high fat nuts. There are ways to keep your body feeling full and without feeling deprived. You discover these ways and you don't even want to go back because somehow, you are finding the healthy eating MORE delicious than munching on chips all day.0 -
CathyGillis wrote: »The negativity toward the original post is so disappointing. People share their feelings on here for support. Saying things like "I don't have any pain" is not helpful. OF COURSE people are going to experience pain or discomfort when they are making changes in their lifestyle.
ummm no, the point that us "negative" people are making is that losing weight does not equal self torture, aka pain.
You can eat in a moderate deficit, hit your calorie/micro/macro goals, eat the foods you like, and exercise moderately and you will lose weight and reach your fitness goals...
the problem is when people equate dieting with having to cut out whole food groups, train seven days a week, two times a day, and think that they have to eat 1200 calories a day while training to excess...
"UUmmm yes". Some people get quite strong hunger pains on a 250kcal/day deficit. I know because I do. I eat healthy, quality foods, high protein and fat, but I still get them. Some people do. Some people are different than you. So by your own admission, you are not qualified to advise on how to deal with these pains.
I would suggest playing with your meal pattern. E.g. if you eat 4 x 500kcal meals a day, try changing the timings if possible, or maybe 5 x 400kcals a day etc. I helps for me, a bit. I was never hungry in the morning so I just skip breakfast and my first meal is my Pre-WO at 10am. I can then use those calories later in the day. Eating the same amount of calories but I get less hunger pains.
Nah, you're missing the point. Some of us, including me, believe that hunger is not painful, Hunger is natural. I would be surprised if anyone who is eating within a certain calorie goal is not hungry sometimes. It happens, but it's not painful to me.
Psychological pain for some? That's self-inflicted. If a person is having physical pain from being hungry, he or she needs to see a doctor because there could be a health condition going on.
As for your suggestion: that's pretty much generic and may work for you, but not for everyone.
Yea it works for me, hence me offering it as advice to the OP, rather than telling her shes not actually experiencing pain.
No, i'm not missing the point, just because I disagree with you. Hunger is pain, in varying degrees. We experience pain and discomfort to make us go eat. It wouldn't work if it was a nice feeling. It has to feel bad to do its job. You can dress it up how you want. No one said it was excruciating but hunger is not a pleasant feeling and can be quite painful when it gets stronger. Plenty of natural things are painful. Pain itself is natural! It's our bodys way of protecting us against injury, starvation, dehydration etc.
Just sayin, the only time hunger was physically painful for me was once in HS when I was working a 9hr shift without being given a break. Didn't eat any food that entire time, I don't recall if I ate much before work either, but at the end of my shift I ended up getting nauseous (to the point that eating once I got home actually HURT my stomach), I was bawling, and I probably had a headache.
THAT was painful. I've never felt that since. Even yesterday, I was getting hungry during my workout because I had only eaten a bit of chocolate beforehand and had not had a proper meal since noonish. This was around 7pm or a bit after. I was able to comfortably complete my workout just fine, it was just a background feeling that I noticed. Even right now I'm a bit hungry, but I'm also a bit thirsty, so the signals are mixing. It's an odd sensation, but not uncomfortable at all.
Hunger isn't pleasant? Duh. It's also not unpleasant. It just is, and if there is noticeable discomfort then I'd suggest you look at your TDEE and weight loss data to make sure that you are losing at your estimated target (so for you, 2lbs/month), and if you are then go to your doctor for some blood tests/check up.0 -
Interesting insight. Yet another woman eating the same amount I am but losing weight. Yet my scale does not move. I have yet to get a logical explanation for this. It's just eye roll inducing.sansaeverdeen wrote: »Thanks for the responses everyone.
I feel hungry after eating, and that's with eating lots of fat, protein etc. I eat 2 boiled eggs per day to help curb the hunger.
I am doing IIFYM and am cutting 20-25%. I used to average 2300 calories a day (I'm 5'10, 27 y.o. female, and 197 lbs). On bad days I'd hit 2500 but rarely more than that unless I went to the Cheesecake Factory (once every five years).
I'm now eating 1800 and my energy levels have taken a serious hit. I think I'm supposed to just live with this but that is why I have come on here for commiseration and advice.
I also exercise and love the feeling of DOMs. I rest up, drink tonnes of water and can't wait to get back out there. My problem is I probably don't exercise enough. I only bike 15 miles a week (to and from school) and walk to the grocery store twice (5 miles per week). I haven't felt DOMs since doing P90x.
I weight like 38lbs less than you and I eat 350 more calories than you do, although my goals are now a 10% deficit. Even when I did a 20% deficit while at a lighter weight than you I was eating 2000 calories. I exercise 4-5x a week for about 4-5hrs a week total. Most of that is strength training. So.. yeah you're probably not eating enough if you are always hungry even after eating.
And you really should not be feeling DOMS all the time. I only feel them if I take a break or try new exercises. So I have some slight DOMS this week because I took last week off, but it's nothing major.
^ hasn't another poster suggested you get blood work done and check your thyroid levels...?0 -
I am very jealous that so many MFP members find it so "easy" to make the right choices. I understand that the right choices are not complicated, as many of you have so often pointed out - just make a small deficit, make the cookie fit your macros, eat more protein, and so on.
But don't you ever just NOT WANT TO? I don't know how else to put it. I want a bagel for breakfast, pizza for lunch and pasta for dinner, and no, that absolutely will not fit my macros based on the amount of each type I will eat, with dessert to follow. It's not that those of us struggling don't have the knowledge on how to make this weight loss thing happen. I do want to lose weight and be healthy and all that jazz, but when I'm asking myself "what do I want for dinner tonight?" the answer will never be something that makes this whole thing easy.
If I want to eat a bagel, pizza, and pasta for the day.. then I will either eat to maintenance or I will eat portions that allow me to fit my caloric needs. I'm basically being responsible for my own body and my own choices, and being responsible can mean either making compromises (smaller portions, or adding "filler" e.g. lots of veggies and meat to a pasta dish and using less pasta; I easily use 50-60g of dry pasta for a single meal and others here complain that 85g dry isn't enough) or simply owning up to a splurge (maintenance intake) and understanding the ramifications (slower weight loss).
Also, I was going to do a mock-up of this meal but the database isn't coming up!! LOL. I'll do it later. My calorie goal is very reasonable (no less than 2000 gross) so.. chances are I'd be able to fit a 200-300 calorie breakfast, ~350-400 lunch, and 400 cal dinner in no problem. These are all estimates based on the portions I normally eat now and that are not compromises for me (I genuinely am satisfied with 50-60g of pasta, os 2 slices of pizza, or a single bagel - even HALF a bagel).
I made a huge macaroni casserole for myself on Monday. I usually eat up to half or more of my calories in the evening (a pattern that developed once I stopped having strict calorie amounts per meal) so I was easily able to do this. Even if I didn't have the calories I would have made it for the next day and logged it ahead of time. On Feb 13th I went to a movie night with friends and we pigged out on pizza, cookies (not for me though, the host only had GF pizza and not GF cookies), and popcorn (one had melted chocolate in it). I ate 5 slices of pizza, 2 marshmallows, and 2 large plates of popcorn, and was still under my goal. I accomplished this by banking extra calories a few days in advance through some cardio and making sure I didn't eat too much during the day beforehand.0 -
I have found that when I eat food I love, the cravings to binge go away. Also, I love filling foods: whether it's a low calorie cucumber or high fat nuts. There are ways to keep your body feeling full and without feeling deprived. You discover these ways and you don't even want to go back because somehow, you are finding the healthy eating MORE delicious than munching on chips all day.
This.
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