Can we find a way to help my little girl stay motivated?

faithsimmons526

My daughter, 'mommyofX2', has been doing great for the last 10 days, but is hitting a bad place in her journey. She normally works very hard at Zumba when she's not keeping her two little ones busy, fed and happy ... and we go to the gym together on Sunday afternoons. She's really done great -- lost at least 7 pounds so far -- but lack of support at home and having little time to take care of herself are taking their toll. She's losing her motivation.

It would be really great if some MFP members could come to the rescue to get her through this stumbling block. I do what I can but it's just not enough.

MysticRealm

Unfortunately, only she can motivate herself, only she can decide she wants it. That's just the way it is. Some people aren't ready to make the commitment yet.

mrsjas2000

I understand completely, I have an in home daycare and 2 children of my own finding time for myself is very hard. My motivation comes and goes with the wind. I have a lot of friends and most say nothing. I support all of my friends but request the same in return

faithsimmons526

Yeah, her biggest problem is that her man is afraid she might leave him when she gets to her goal ... so he goes out of his way to sabotage her.

usmcmp

Unfortunately, only she can motivate herself, only she can decide she wants it. That's just the way it is. Some people aren't ready to make the commitment yet.

This is what I was coming to say. I am a single mom with two kids. I had to find a way to want it for myself while working a full time job and raising two small boys alone. She simply has to want it herself. All the motivation and support online will mean nothing if she can't do it herself anyway.

usmcmp

Yeah, her biggest problem is that her man is afraid she might leave him when she gets to her goal ... so he goes out of his way to sabotage her.

Sounds like a very unhealthy relationship. They should consider seeing a professional about that. Would probably be good for both of them.

shortie_sarah

sometimes it's a lot easier to start with one thing at a time. They way you eat is the most important thing when it comes to losing weight. So maybe she should just start with that for now. Exercise is important, too, but that can come later. That way, she won't feel so overwhelmed with it.

faithsimmons526

hahaha ... silly me.

All I was asking was for a few awesome people like the ones who added me to do the same for her, and offer a little support.

rachelc677

hahaha you're not silly.... yeah yeah she has to want it for herself but sometimes having MFPfriends can go a long way to helping out... I've added you and your daugher already

faithsimmons526

Exactly ... thank you rachel.

BeachIron

Wait. You are her mom, she is an adult, and you are asking for people on MFP to help your "little girl" out? She can't ask herself? I'm sorry, but at some point motivation has to come from within. No one other than the individual in question can choose for her to get up and go to the gym, to eat in moderation, to struggle through hard days, or deal with life's little ups and downs. I'm sorry but cut the apron strings. Seriously.

jofjltncb6

Wait. You are her mom, she is an adult, and you are asking for people on MFP to help your "little girl" out? She can't ask herself? I'm sorry, but at some point motivation has to come from within. No one other than the individual in question can choose for her to get up and go to the gym, to eat in moderation, to struggle through hard days, or deal with life's little ups and downs. I'm sorry but cut the apron strings. Seriously.

And maybe don't call out her boyfriend/your potential-future-son-in-law publicly like that. It looks bad.


Edit: because I had them as married when apparently they aren't.

pastryari

Is this real life?

BeachGingerOnTheRocks

I don't mean to be negative about your desire to help your daughter, but did you think this through? Does she know that you posted this? It kind of puts her personal life out there without her consent. Her marriage is her marriage. As much as you'd like to help, you might make things even worse between them, particularly if he reads this or your daughter gets upset with you for insulting her husband.

I'm sorry he's not as supportive as you think he should be, but that really should be between your daughter and her husband.

taunto

I don't mean to be negative about your desire to help your daughter, but did you think this through? Does she know that you posted this? It kind of puts her personal life out there without her consent. Her marriage is her marriage. As much as you'd like to help, you might make things even worse between them, particularly if he reads this or your daughter gets upset with you for insulting her husband.

I'm sorry he's not as supportive as you think he should be, but that really should be between your daughter and her husband.

Agreed!

CrankMeUp

Is this real life?

or is this just fantasy?

ThickMcRunFast

Is this real life?

i think its just fantasy.

amandalc980

Is this real life?

or is this just fantasy?

CRAP!!! Now its stuck in my head!

butterflymarks

Is this real life?

or is this just fantasy?

Caught in a land slide...

mommyofX2

Just reading this now. I am the daughter. Thanks to those who have added me and said such kind words. I was feeling alone and to be honest I didnt want to bother people with my problems and I want to thank my mom for being so supportive with this (means the world to me) and this actually makes me feel more motivated to prove to some that people can get a lot of something like this. I know I am going to have my off days like today but i know i can have way more like last week which I ended up losing 7 pounds from working so hard. I need to find a way to balance my life with this and I havent quite figured it out yet but... I will.

And as for my bf and I we are great together its just he doesnt know how to support me fully. I think he wants to but he cant figured out the right way to do it.

charlenequinn94

you can friend me

CrankMeUp

Just reading this now. I am the daughter. Thanks to those who have added me and said such kind words. I was feeling alone and to be honest I didnt want to bother people with my problems and I want to thank my mom for being so supportive with this (means the world to me) and this actually makes me feel more motivated to prove to some that people can get a lot of something like this. I know I am going to have my off days like today but i know i can have way more like last week which I ended up losing 7 pounds from working so hard. I need to find a way to balance my life with this and I havent quite figured it out yet but... I will.

And as for my bf and I we are great together its just he doesnt know how to support me fully. I think he wants to but he cant figured out the right way to do it.

You really arent alone

we all struggle at times...it is what you DO that makes the difference,

good luck!

TheHorribleBlob

Yeah, her biggest problem is that her man is afraid she might leave him when she gets to her goal ... so he goes out of his way to sabotage her.

If she leaves him now, he won't have to worry about her leaving when she gets to her goal. :P

What she needs is more weight loss buddies (preferably ones that are motivated). Internet buddies are cool, but it's always nice to have someone you know in real life suffering alongside you.

She also needs to listen to Eye of the Tiger.

cherio256

I have never seen such rude people in my entire life. Maybe coming from the south I'm not accustomed to people being so hateful over someone wanting help. Motivation from others can help. I would be happy to help anyone that I can in any way. I guess it just depends on how your raised though.

Mock_Turtle

I have never seen such rude people in my entire life. Maybe coming from the south I'm not accustomed to people being so hateful

too easy ....

MysticRealm

I have never seen such rude people in my entire life. Maybe coming from the south I'm not accustomed to people being so hateful over someone wanting help. Motivation from others can help. I would be happy to help anyone that I can in any way. I guess it just depends on how your raised though.

Your definition of rude must vary from what most people understand it as. I don't see a single rude person. I see people telling the truth but I don't think telling the truth should be considered rude.

Laces_0ut

I have never seen such rude people in my entire life. Maybe coming from the south I'm not accustomed to people being so hateful over someone wanting help. Motivation from others can help. I would be happy to help anyone that I can in any way. I guess it just depends on how your raised though.

who is being "hateful"? and the south is known for lots of racism...just saying.

CrankMeUp

I have never seen such rude people in my entire life. Maybe coming from the south I'm not accustomed to people being so hateful over someone wanting help. Motivation from others can help. I would be happy to help anyone that I can in any way. I guess it just depends on how your raised though.

I was raised with apostrophe re.

cherio256

Haha! Racism? What does that have to do with what we are discussing here? I can guarantee that I'm not racist as I am raising a biracial child, but whatever. As Bambi said, if you don't have something nice to say don't say nothing at all. The woman who started this thread has the right to ask for help if she chooses, not hear cut the apron string and things of that nature.

BeachIron

I have never seen such rude people in my entire life. Maybe coming from the south I'm not accustomed to people being so hateful over someone wanting help. Motivation from others can help. I would be happy to help anyone that I can in any way. I guess it just depends on how your raised though.

I was raised with apostrophe re.

Having been born and raised in the South, I can assure everyone that we teach grammar along with a certain level of honesty. We do, however, have our pretty little things.

As for the racism comment, it is true that we have asshats in the South, but so does everywhere else. It's an unfortunate reality.

tameko2

Haha! Racism? What does that have to do with what we are discussing here? I can guarantee that I'm not racist as I am raising a biracial child, but whatever. As Bambi said, if you don't have something nice to say don't say nothing at all. The woman who started this thread has the right to ask for help if she chooses, not hear cut the apron string and things of that nature.

She asked for advice on "finding a way" to keep her little girl motivated.

People gave advice.

We're all VERY sad that you did not like the advice, but no one was rude (except for you, actually) and also, it isn't even your thread so I'm not sure what you think this was going to accomplish.