Intimidated at the gym.
racheljess35
Posts: 6 Member
I'm a graduate student and have access to my university's gym. I used to be very active and fit, but after a semester of grad school I've put on some weight. I know what I'm doing at the gym, but I feel like the extra weight is making me scared to get in there.
My question is: how do I stop feeling intimidated? I want to use the weight room, but every time I walk by it's full of huge, scary guys with giant muscles lifting 20x more than I can. I want to lift but I don't want to look like a dumb fatty (even though I know what to do!).
Help!
My question is: how do I stop feeling intimidated? I want to use the weight room, but every time I walk by it's full of huge, scary guys with giant muscles lifting 20x more than I can. I want to lift but I don't want to look like a dumb fatty (even though I know what to do!).
Help!
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Replies
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by going and doing.
Don't worry about what they are lifting- they don't care- they are going to look at you- you're a new face in the community.
Just go at off peak hours- if you truly know what you are doing- then you shouldn't be worried about it.
Go lift.
Get fabulous.
Don't worry about what anyone else thinks.
Go in off peak hours- and it'll be less stressful.
Also- if you truly knew what you were doing- you'd know that those big scary dudes- aren't that big probably and aren't that scary- and that what weight they are lifting doesn't matter.
Not trying to call your bluff- but those are the nicest people in the gym who will be the ones who can help you if you need it. So. Just saying.
Don't worry about it- just go do it.0 -
You are psyching yourself out, just ignore those thoughts. I started lifting not even knowing what to do, and was intimidated but in reality nobody even paid attention to me, most people get into their routine and focus on that. You'll be fine imo0
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Wear baggy stuff the first few times, it's like a power cloak0
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You are the awesome dude if u do it. Each to his own capability. You are doing this for you, not them. Eventually you become part of that room, respect us built on dedication not size. Go for it0
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It's both natural and unfounded. I felt the same way at one point. I think many if not most people do. But there's nothing to do but do it. I go in at 5 am or after 10 pm still... but now it's because I don't want to wait on the rack.0
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Chin up, stand tall, own it!0
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If your really worried about it, go an hour before closing on a saturday night. Once you've done it once and eliminated the worry over what to do (get back into the routine, find what weights you currently need, find all the equipment locations, etc...) it will get easier. That way when you go and its crowded you know exactly where to go to get what you need...no fumbling around feeling awkward.
Then just do it. It will become second nature.
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Those guys don't give two craps what you are lifting. Just go. You have to start somewhere.0
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huge scrrry guys. On international women's day, no less. Sadz.
What happened to empowerment? Self determination?
Awkward.-5 -
by going and doing.
Don't worry about what they are lifting- they don't care- they are going to look at you- you're a new face in the community.
Just go at off peak hours- if you truly know what you are doing- then you shouldn't be worried about it.
Go lift.
Get fabulous.
Don't worry about what anyone else thinks.
Go in off peak hours- and it'll be less stressful.
Also- if you truly knew what you were doing- you'd know that those big scary dudes- aren't that big probably and aren't that scary- and that what weight they are lifting doesn't matter.
Not trying to call your bluff- but those are the nicest people in the gym who will be the ones who can help you if you need it. So. Just saying.
Don't worry about it- just go do it.
If you learn any single thing in grad school, learn to listen to this person. ^0 -
They don't care about what you are doing. The fact that you are lifting weights at all shows you have your priorities straight.
I once went to failure on overhead presses and couldn't get the bar back up to the rack (though not for lack of, very awkward, trying). A guy came up to me and asked if I needed help getting the bar back up, very non-judgmental, just asking if he could help. It's not a big deal. Some people will always lift more than you, and some less. You do you.0 -
Wear baggy stuff the first few times, it's like a power cloak
and wear had phones as well, you are more likely to be left alone.arditarose wrote: »Those guys don't give two craps what you are lifting. Just go. You have to start somewhere.
good advice.0 -
racheljess35 wrote: »I'm a graduate student and have access to my university's gym. I used to be very active and fit, but after a semester of grad school I've put on some weight. I know what I'm doing at the gym, but I feel like the extra weight is making me scared to get in there.
My question is: how do I stop feeling intimidated? I want to use the weight room, but every time I walk by it's full of huge, scary guys with giant muscles lifting 20x more than I can. I want to lift but I don't want to look like a dumb fatty (even though I know what to do!).
Help!
Ha I feel exactly the same! I am the fatty in the weight room.
Started venturing in that section only very recently and I always feel a bit judged. But then I realise actually that's far more in my own head than anyone elses. Everyone is far too focused on their own workouts to worry about mine.
And actually, the only comments I have got from the scary muscle guys is that it's great to see a female doing it
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I just try to go early morning or late at night. This has a 2 fold benefit: there are fewer people to be intimidated by and there are fewer people to compete with over who gets the squat rack next.
However, I have had really good interactions for the most part with all the muscle in the gym. People are polite, ask it you are done or when you expect to be done, and have helped me get un-trapped from the bench press (twice).
Walk in, head up, ear buds in (even if you don't have music), and a look of determination that says "I am going to have a beast of a session!" No one will bug you, except to maybe ask if you are done with something.
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What people don't realize is that gym goers are going to look at the new person. What people really care more about is seeing your transformation. We see your starting point. We'd like to see where you end up.
OP if you notice you use these " scary guys with giant muscles" which call them what you want have put work into accomplishing that. Your mad about what exactly? That they did it. Stop using them as an excuse to not better yourself.0 -
They're actually really nice. The biggest guy in the gym gave me form advice when I was just starting to squat.racheljess35 wrote: »I want to use the weight room, but every time I walk by it's full of huge, scary guys with giant muscles lifting 20x more than I can.
Most people don't care what anyone else is doing at the gym though, as long as you're not rude or disruptive no one is going to be judging you.0 -
Chances are they are not paying attention to you at all. I thought the first couple of times I went to the gym people were staring and thing "what is that fat girl doing here?" Well turns out I was wrong. Just walk in and work out.
To add- make sure you re-rack everything. I hate when people don't.0 -
Thanks everyone!
To clarify, I only mean scary in the sense that I'm intimidated by how determined they are. I'm going to brave the weight room tonight! Thanks for your advice, everyone
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I put in my headphones and crank the music. It helps me zone out and forget anyone else is there. I stick to what I have to do and get it done. Good luck, you'll do great!0
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Agree with PP! Put your head phones in and do what you're going to do. If it makes you that uncomfortable, don't even look around. Those dudes are probably in their zone anyways and if they are noticing they're probably like, damn girl. Good for you.0
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I like to use their motivation to motivate myself. It can be uplifting to be surrounded by weightlifters and be a part of the environment. The guys at my gym are usually either helpful or really into their own workout so they don't notice anything else. Def listen to music - helps me zone out.0
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If you know what you're doing in the gym then you'll quickly notice how terrible most "big" guys lifting form is...slanging weight around all crazy, like they're doing the humpty dance (just kidding..go lift for goodness sake!)0
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It's like a bandaid, just rip it off and go in there. NO ONE IS LOOKING AT YOU! I was worried before too but quickly I realized how silly I was. I'm too focused on my own work out to notice anyone else and so are the other people working out in there. Just think, if these big guys are lifting triple digits they are way too busy and focused to watch you and vice versa.0
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Just know that most of the dudes are pouring it on and trying to look intimidating as possible to try and impress you more than likely. Just laugh it off in your mind and continue on. Remember they're more afraid of you than you are of them lol
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Just know that most of the dudes are pouring it on and trying to look intimidating as possible to try and impress you more than likely. Just laugh it off in your mind and continue on. Remember they're more afraid of you than you are of them lol
really- most of the guys in my gym are you know... there to lift. so they lift.0 -
I'm a personal trainer at a bodybuilding gym and hear this every single day. I don't believe I've ever had a client who wasn't intimidated in the gym (and I work with those scary guys lifting 20x more than anybody else... they're looking around wondering what people are thinking of them too). Just walk in and do your thing. Most people will be impressed. Anyone who's not isn't worth your time.0
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i was 285 and super weak when i started and i just went every day, and then after about 15-20 days or so i started to feel like i belonged, i started to notice the people that went the same time as me, i got used to where everything was in the gym and knew what i was doing. It just takes time for any new routine to feel comfortable.
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Just know that most of the dudes are pouring it on and trying to look intimidating as possible to try and impress you more than likely. Just laugh it off in your mind and continue on. Remember they're more afraid of you than you are of them lol
really- most of the guys in my gym are you know... there to lift. so they lift.
True, but you honestly don't think they give it a bit extra when a good looking girl is around? That's why I prefer to go to a gym, more people around makes you push just a bit harder than if you were at home.
....aside from that I was attempting to help her out with her intimidation issues at the gym!0 -
I feel you. I was 5'4", 197#, and pushing 40 when I walked into Gold's Gym amongst the MuscleBros. They did not give 2 rat's hind legs, except that after a couple months & 15 lbs down, a couple of them said how great I was doing. I was surprised, and pretty pleased. Chicks who lift are just the tops, so go for it. Nobody cares until you stick around. I hope you are having a fantastic night lifting! 0
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Just know that most of the dudes are pouring it on and trying to look intimidating as possible to try and impress you more than likely. Just laugh it off in your mind and continue on. Remember they're more afraid of you than you are of them lol
really- most of the guys in my gym are you know... there to lift. so they lift.
True, but you honestly don't think they give it a bit extra when a good looking girl is around? That's why I prefer to go to a gym, more people around makes you push just a bit harder than if you were at home.
....aside from that I was attempting to help her out with her intimidation issues at the gym!
I realize that- but that should be from within. Veiled compliments about guys reacting to a womans prescence insults men- robs them of their hard work- and it kind of puts a bad onus on the woman.
it's just dangerous territory.
And honestly- I don't give a rats a22 what they do- I know *most* of guys at my gym don't'- they train hard. They train hard if I'm there or not there. Yeah we have days where we get into mini comps- or there is max out monday- and sure we go ham- but EVERYONE is going ham in front of everyone. Not just because some woman walks in.
Training is training. you either no how to work hard or you don't. Everyone else can see it too they know if you're working or posing.0
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