"You're too skinny!" Do others ever make you question your maintenance weight?

I haven't ever posted before, but appreciate the support that this forum offers and want to get in on it! Lately, I've been in need of support from those who understand the struggles of weight loss and maintenance.

Since the fall of 2013, I went from 180lbs to 125lbs (female, 5'6") and have been maintaining at 125 (+/- 2lbs) for the past 6 months. As time goes on, I have gotten more and more serious about exercise and specifically running. I really enjoy seeing where my body can take me and it's motivating to break my personal records and times while running.

In the process, my body fat percentage has dropped to around 18% and while I am happy with the way I look, a lot of people around me keep making comments like "you're too skinny" or "you had better not lose any more weight". It's not just 1 or 2 people either -- it's many of those I am close to and even family members. It really makes me second guess myself and question whether I have some kind of body dysmorphia or eating disorder even though I am within the healthy range for BMI and I eat between 1800-2300 calories/day (depending on how much I work out).

Has anyone else dealt with this? How do you respond to comments like this?
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Replies

  • yesimpson
    yesimpson Posts: 1,372 Member
    I'm the same height and weight as you are and I get these comments too.

    I have to laugh at the fact people think it's OK to give their verdict on other's (perfectly healthy) bodies in this context. If you're at a healthy BMI, eating enough for your activity, your doctor is satisfied, and you're HAPPY, I'd just smile "I'm absolutely fine, thanks for your concern" and change the subject.
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  • TheVirgoddess
    TheVirgoddess Posts: 4,535 Member
    It is embarassing when people say that because I never know how to respond. It's just because they are not used to seeing you as "thin" yet. If you were always 125 no one would say anything. I think you look great and your calorie range shows you have a healthy perspective. I think the best response is something like "No, I am fine and I feel great!"

    Yes, this. I have people tell me this often - and I'm 160 pounds. I'm not skinny. It's just that I've been 230 pounds for years - so comparatively speaking, I probably DO look skinny to them.

    I don't say anything, because it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. The first time I heard it, it did sort of make me second guess myself. But you've got this :)
  • crystalflame
    crystalflame Posts: 1,049 Member
    I've gotten comments from friends about specific things - "your legs used to be so nice," "your hip bones show too much," etc. People have different tastes, and my preferred aesthetic may not be theirs. I can appreciate concern for my health, as unnecessary as it is. Since these comments were from friends, I had a talk with them to make it clear their unsolicited opinion was rude and to assure them that I'm happy and healthy the way I am. When I've gotten the "You're too skinny" from coworkers or acquaintances, I've just said "No, I'm not" and moved on. Not their business.
  • brynnsmom
    brynnsmom Posts: 945 Member
    I've heard this alot over the past four years since I lost the weight I wanted to, and I just laugh it off. Yes, I am at the lower end of the healthy weight range for my height. That doesn't make me unhealthy. Yes, I want to look this way and I love being active and challenging my body physically. Tracking calories and being fit and lean is not the same as being too skinny. Anyone who feels the need to comment about someone else's body is likely doing it for reasons completely unrelated to YOU.
  • teegoods38
    teegoods38 Posts: 21 Member
    I've received comments from some people, they say things like oh she can't eat this or that she's on a diet. My response to the comments are this is a lifestlye change for me(I don't do diets. Some people feel insecure about themeselves and feel like they have to say something bad to you to make themeselves feel good . What others think or say about me don't affect me I feel much healther and have lot's more energy. Keep up the great work you look great.
  • Foamroller
    Foamroller Posts: 1,041 Member
    edited March 2015
    Yeah, I get that too. It's odd cause people never said I was too skinny when I maintained at 3 kg lighter for most of my adult life...

    Just ignore "the concern" and say you feel fine and healthy. Sometimes people say stupid stuff not out of malice, but ignorance. Getting worked up over it... is it worth it ?
  • 50452
    50452 Posts: 170 Member
    When someone said that to me (no for a long time), I smiled. I loved it. I am also 5'4" and weighed 125 lbs. I knew I wasn't underweight. It was a huge compliment.

    I can't hardly wait for day to come again.
  • rushfive
    rushfive Posts: 603 Member
    edited March 2015
    I had this happen about 15 years ago... when I was busy raising little kids..
    I truly did not know " I looked to thin" till I was told this... so when I got home I weighted myself (back in the days I did not have to think about a scale/weight). I was underweight, went to doctor and had thyroid trouble. removed it.
    Now I am trying to lose the extra pound put ON from the ordeal.
    But you obviously are aware of "what you weigh". Maybe just a kind... " I am in the normal range".
  • freefallebby
    freefallebby Posts: 26 Member
    Taking progress photos also helps, so you can see the changes for yourself. I've still got some old photos (this is from before smart phones being invented) from when I was only running all the time and way too thin, I wasn't being real with myself. I looked worse at a lower weight in those photos than now at a heavier healthier weight. So just be real to yourself, make sure you don't go off the deep end. The deep end sucks. I've been there and decided to start living a balanced life again.
  • OhReally42
    OhReally42 Posts: 138 Member
    I'm no where near maintaining,I'm in fact still losing, but comments like the "you're too fat" or "I don't date fat girls" when I was 125lbs are why my self esteem was and part of why it still is so low. I think one of the best comments I've heard in retort to those people is "Thank you for your concern, but I am happy the way I am" or "Thank you for your concern, but I live my life in a healthy way for myself and I'm fine with how I look"
  • FatFreeFrolicking
    FatFreeFrolicking Posts: 4,252 Member
    As someone who was significantly underweight from birth to age 18, I heard "You're too skinny!" and "Eat a cheeseburger!" a lot. My favorite was when people tried to say I was anorexic. My reply was usually something along the lines of, "Anorexics eat over 2500 calories?"

    I was naturally thin and petite. I was a competitive gymnast and cheerleader for over 10 years. That was just how I was built.

    When someone comments on your weight, simply tell them "thank you for your concern but my doctor assures me I'm healthy as can be." That will usually shut them up.



  • Laughter_Girl
    Laughter_Girl Posts: 2,226 Member
    I get similar comments quite often, and I do in fact believe it's hard for people to adjust to change when they have become accustomed to a certain look. I just get tickled every time someone says something about me being too thin because I'm not even at my goal weight yet. Technically, I'm still overweight. Surprisingly to me, I think I hear the comments more from men, which is really strange to me. For example, my male colleague, who I rarely talk to, told me just this morning that I didn't need to lose anymore weight. He told me that men (He apparently knows what every man in the world wants.) like to have something to hold on to, and I was going to be all bones pretty soon. I laughed it off because HE is not my husband, and I know for a fact that my husband is not complaining one bit about my transforming body. :)

    Those comments only motivate me more to reach my goal.
  • dym123
    dym123 Posts: 1,670 Member
    This is how I feel when someone calls me skinny
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