We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....

srv524

Misunderstood what I was asking her to pull

Kvm11628

Got his fingers up in everyone's business.

srv524

Kept sticking her fingers in her private parts during family gatherings. My grandma was not pleased.

Nograce80

She was a wee bit paranoid about where my fingers were

srv524

Used the words "wee bit" pretty frequently

Nograce80

Was insecure about his manhood

Kvm11628

Kept leaving all our valuables unsecured. She didn't care about all we had built together.

srv524

She wouldn't accept the fact that I was the one who made the money that allowed us to build everything. Always took me for granted.

cmDaffy

Would only let me play the "good girl"

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Her bad girl involved actual torture devices.

Kvm11628

Listening to him go on and on about his duck was torture.

srv524

Didn't understand my duck worship

no_russian

Catfish

junelove89

He gave me flowers instead of chocolates

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

I gave her a ring, she gave me herpes.

srv524

I gave him my love, he gave me a duck

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Didn't understand how much the duck meant.

junelove89

He would always make his stuffed duck watch while we were doing it

Kvm11628

He kept misinterpreting what I said, It wasn't a D-uck, I asked for.

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Wouldn't let me turn our bedroom into a pond for my duck.

Nograce80

I didn't give a duck anymore

junelove89

She never let me go on top... I hated the bottom bunk bed

mnshanbhag

was always sleeping

Kvm11628

Tried to jimmy my car door open as I tried to get away leave.

Kvm11628

Well, it WAS Jimmy Kimmel. He's pretty damn funny.

srv524

She liked Jimmy Kimmel, enough said.

junelove89

He spent too much time in the mud

srv524

Always wanted a mud facial, minus the mud

Kvm11628

He told me I needed a facial.

MaxPower6868

Wouldn't let me give her a facial