Why do people lock their diaries?
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It's a personal choice. Mine's open - has been since I started over 2 years ago. I had someone once criticize me for not logging every day because that was the advice I gave her. I missed 1 day that year because I was out of cell range in a little backwater town in Germany on a vacation omfg. It's still open.
I'm a lot less active on the forums these days because I am super busy at work and quite frankly I hate the 'new' look but I still post from time to time.
If you want to look at diaries the easiest way is to put a post out looking for people who have open ones. If people's aren't open then it's up to you to friend them or not but don't get upset about it. Opening your diary isn't a requirement to use MFP. I personally don't add friends if they have closed diaries just because I don't want to have to deal with people convinced they need to starve to lose and people with EDs (I'm not qualified to provide support for them) but this is my personal choice.
I DO look at friends diaries - especially if they comment that they are stuck or if I see a streak of '..eating below calories' but if I make a comment it will be to them privately and they can choose to ignore me if they wish and I can choose to keep them as friends or not. It's all about choices
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I set mine private because I started logging as a way to track myself and make sure I was eating enough. I don't use MFP's numbers, and I don't use it for weight loss, so I don't see the point I guess.
Why does it matter?0 -
beemerphile1 wrote: »Not just diary, why do people make their profile private? There is nothing in my profile that will enable someone to show up at my house or work so there is no need for privacy.
When people post on here I will sometimes look at their profile to figure out where they are at in this journey. Weight, age, sex, height, can all be pertinent information to understanding the person's post.
That's easy to say if you've never been stalked online before.
Here's all it takes - one profile pic with any kind of recognizable landmark (or simply having your location visible). One food diary entry for a meal at a place that's locally owned and operated. One post in the forums casually mentioning any kind of event like a soccer game after school. One blog entry about a death in the family. Google reverse image search/tineye.
You don't even need all of those things, just one or two, and casually mentioning little details about your life like your job laying off x number of people or a huge accident you passed on the way home from work - anything likely to be mentioned in the local news.
We go out of our way to teach kids online safety, but the reality is, most adults don't bother.0 -
Everything made "public" is up to scrutiny, debate and challenge. Especially in cyber space and media forums...
Why give someone edge on my private stuff.. It does seem weird though to let strangers see what you eat and how you exercise every day if the choose to...
When I was kid, I did not want my brother, father or mother (nor my best friend) to know what I wrote in my diary... I guess I still feel the same..
I've read several comments like this- and what I find most odd about this- is why do you think people are digging through your food diary?
I couldn't tell you the last time I looked at someone's diary.
no scratch that. when someone comes into the gaining forum- asks "why can't I gain weight" I go look.
when it's completely blank (it almost always is) I have an answer.
Otherwise- only time I go look is if someone says they had an epic day- and usually they post a screen shot.
Honestly I rarely look- so I mentally assume no one else does- I was shocked mid argument with someone they said- "oh I've looked your diary- I got some great ideas" I didn't even think of it. I was not offended- just surprised since I never look- I assume few other people to.
That is the only time I look. I never comment on any friends diary submission by saying "wtg" or whatever because I never look at their diaries.
me to- I have to point out things... like my "small fetus" day. I entered that- so I made a comment- people looked.
I think it has a lot to do with the types of 'friends' you gather.
I haven't had anyone ever tell me I ate poorly- I've NEVER gotten a PM or anyone poking me on my profile about my food diary. I can't even imagine.0 -
Some people have been sent 'hate mail' because some other random person thought they were doing their diet all wrong.
I'm kind of surprised I haven't gotten any since I keep mine open. Lately, I'm eating way more chocolate, ice cream, and cakes than I really should be. And fewer veg. Although variety has gone up, so that's a plus.
Oh, FYI in case someone decides to take a look: I'm already at goal, have my calories set about 100 below maintenance, and am not including exercise calories. So all those red numbers aren't actually over my calorie limits.
Just so no one thinks I regularly eat over by a couple of hundred calories and not gain.0 -
always eat more vag... I mean veg... veggies. always eat more veggies.0
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beemerphile1 wrote: »Not just diary, why do people make their profile private? There is nothing in my profile that will enable someone to show up at my house or work so there is no need for privacy.
When people post on here I will sometimes look at their profile to figure out where they are at in this journey. Weight, age, sex, height, can all be pertinent information to understanding the person's post.
That's funny because when I tried to access your profile this is what I saw:
Kind of funny.0 -
Think of the volume of information you're sharing? Literally everything you eat day after day. That's a lot of information to make public and it doesn't surprise me that perfectly reasonable people would find that invasive and save accountability for their friends list.0
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Imagine the treasure trove of info public health officials would have if they so desired. Overweight? Hmmmm....let's see why.....not to mention anything else you could possibly dream up.0
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beemerphile1 wrote: »Not just diary, why do people make their profile private? There is nothing in my profile that will enable someone to show up at my house or work so there is no need for privacy.
When people post on here I will sometimes look at their profile to figure out where they are at in this journey. Weight, age, sex, height, can all be pertinent information to understanding the person's post.
That's easy to say if you've never been stalked online before.
Here's all it takes - one profile pic with any kind of recognizable landmark (or simply having your location visible). One food diary entry for a meal at a place that's locally owned and operated. One post in the forums casually mentioning any kind of event like a soccer game after school. One blog entry about a death in the family. Google reverse image search/tineye.
You don't even need all of those things, just one or two, and casually mentioning little details about your life like your job laying off x number of people or a huge accident you passed on the way home from work - anything likely to be mentioned in the local news.
We go out of our way to teach kids online safety, but the reality is, most adults don't bother.
You really do need to be careful. I am a regular on another message board site. I have seen people who don't like somebody research them using the things you mentioned, find out their real name and various personal details, and publicly list them on the site for everybody to read...name, address, where they work, arrest records, details on their family members...it's a little crazy. This has happened to several people there. I also heard a story (it was before I joined that board) of a guy who actually contacted the boss of somebody from the site he didn't like. He said all kinds of damaging things and caused real life problems for the person. Some people are really malicious if they don't like a person. That's why I'll never post photos or reveal too many details about my life.0 -
MoiAussi93 wrote: »beemerphile1 wrote: »Not just diary, why do people make their profile private? There is nothing in my profile that will enable someone to show up at my house or work so there is no need for privacy.
When people post on here I will sometimes look at their profile to figure out where they are at in this journey. Weight, age, sex, height, can all be pertinent information to understanding the person's post.
That's easy to say if you've never been stalked online before.
Here's all it takes - one profile pic with any kind of recognizable landmark (or simply having your location visible). One food diary entry for a meal at a place that's locally owned and operated. One post in the forums casually mentioning any kind of event like a soccer game after school. One blog entry about a death in the family. Google reverse image search/tineye.
You don't even need all of those things, just one or two, and casually mentioning little details about your life like your job laying off x number of people or a huge accident you passed on the way home from work - anything likely to be mentioned in the local news.
We go out of our way to teach kids online safety, but the reality is, most adults don't bother.
You really do need to be careful. I am a regular on another message board site. I have seen people who don't like somebody research them using the things you mentioned, find out their real name and various personal details, and publicly list them on the site for everybody to read...name, address, where they work, arrest records, details on their family members...it's a little crazy. This has happened to several people there. I also heard a story (it was before I joined that board) of a guy who actually contacted the boss of somebody from the site he didn't like. He said all kinds of damaging things and caused real life problems for the person. Some people are really malicious if they don't like a person. That's why I'll never post photos or reveal too many details about my life.
That kind of thing happens every day, actually. There are groups of "activists" on tumblr who make it a mission to track down and harass people who disagree with them politically. There was one cartoonist who was fired because someone was offended by a single comic. A few dozen people kept the phones tied up and sent hundreds of emails to her employer, and they let her go entirely as a safety and liability concern, even though they didn't believe any of the things people were saying about her.0 -
TMoiAussi93 wrote: »beemerphile1 wrote: »Not just diary, why do people make their profile private? There is nothing in my profile that will enable someone to show up at my house or work so there is no need for privacy.
When people post on here I will sometimes look at their profile to figure out where they are at in this journey. Weight, age, sex, height, can all be pertinent information to understanding the person's post.
That's easy to say if you've never been stalked online before.
Here's all it takes - one profile pic with any kind of recognizable landmark (or simply having your location visible). One food diary entry for a meal at a place that's locally owned and operated. One post in the forums casually mentioning any kind of event like a soccer game after school. One blog entry about a death in the family. Google reverse image search/tineye.
You don't even need all of those things, just one or two, and casually mentioning little details about your life like your job laying off x number of people or a huge accident you passed on the way home from work - anything likely to be mentioned in the local news.
We go out of our way to teach kids online safety, but the reality is, most adults don't bother.
You really do need to be careful. I am a regular on another message board site. I have seen people who don't like somebody research them using the things you mentioned, find out their real name and various personal details, and publicly list them on the site for everybody to read...name, address, where they work, arrest records, details on their family members...it's a little crazy. This has happened to several people there. I also heard a story (it was before I joined that board) of a guy who actually contacted the boss of somebody from the site he didn't like. He said all kinds of damaging things and caused real life problems for the person. Some people are really malicious if they don't like a person. That's why I'll never post photos or reveal too many details about my life.
That kind of thing happens every day, actually. There are groups of "activists" on tumblr who make it a mission to track down and harass people who disagree with them politically. There was one cartoonist who was fired because someone was offended by a single comic. A few dozen people kept the phones tied up and sent hundreds of emails to her employer, and they let her go entirely as a safety and liability concern, even though they didn't believe any of the things people were saying about her.
The dark side of the Internet! It gives crazy people a new means to cause problems.0 -
tretoptreece wrote: »beemerphile1 wrote: »Not just diary, why do people make their profile private? There is nothing in my profile that will enable someone to show up at my house or work so there is no need for privacy.
When people post on here I will sometimes look at their profile to figure out where they are at in this journey. Weight, age, sex, height, can all be pertinent information to understanding the person's post.
That's funny because when I tried to access your profile this is what I saw:
Kind of funny.
I don't know why you got that my profile and diary are open to MFP members.0 -
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mamapeach910 wrote: »marissafit06 wrote: »I was in a thread where someone ran a report of another person's (not her friend) macro intake for the past few months. I found that pretty shocking. I guess I shouldn't care about what I eat so much. My diary is open to friends if they care curious.
I was just about to reference that same thread...a fairly well-known and helpful forum poster had her food diary copy-and-pasted to a thread with a food-by-food nitpicking and an accusation of "you eat terribly, how dare you give anyone advice!"
Joke was on the rude person, though, because the attacked party actually had been eating very healthfully for her stats and needs. But, even if she hadn't been...WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT
Oh hello there! That person would have been moi! It has since been proven that the copy pasta party LIED about getting reports on my micro consumption. I should have seen it at the time, too. Saying I was low on calcium? Hello? I eat cottage cheese and yogurt every flipping day!
Anyway, whether someone's diary is open or closed is their business. I keep mine public, and a few fellow veggies on my friends list and I creep each others diaries for meal ideas and inspiration. I don't find that creepy in that sort of context. One of my friends got an idea to change her macro balance from looking at my diary.
It doesn't bother me if other people chose to keep their diaries private, except when they come onto threads and need help and won't open them.
It also didn't bother me that someone tried to publicly criticize my intake. I'm old and well past caring what other people think, even if her criticisms had had any merit.
We were all quite offended on your behalf, though.
I missed that somehow, but I would have been!0 -
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Same. I've also never gotten PMs from people judging my diary. If I have low days, the next day will make up for it. If there are circumstances I write a note on my diary. I don't really need to explain to strangers about why Monday was only 1500 calories when Tuesday winds up being 2500 calories.. they can do the math themselves! Plus my profile is pretty specific about my food/weight loss philosophy, so for anyone to assume that I don't practice what I preach from some "bad" days or something isn't really worth my time.beemerphile1 wrote: »My diary is open to all. I really don't care what anyone thinks, it is working for me.
Thid. Mine is open. I admittedly eat alot of crap....I've never had anyone comment on my diary.0
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