Informal Poll: Mean People

Options
124678

Replies

  • Nuke807
    Nuke807 Posts: 160 Member
    Options
    I think that the BMI charts are skewed, it truly depends on your frame. I am currently at a 32 BMI, while overweight, I do not feel that I am "obese". At my healthiest and fittest (in the military) I was 177 pounds (I am 5'5" on a good day). I am at 200 now, and understand that I need to loose about 20-25 pounds, but damn, not one scale fits all...
  • jorinya
    jorinya Posts: 933 Member
    Options
    I was 13, my granny was just buried and my cousin came up to me after the funeral and said " you have an *kitten* the size of a double decker bus and a face like a pizza ". Between then and 15 I became anorexic. I was only a UK size 10 when he said that. His words never left me growing up. I carried it into my marriage, feeling I'm not wanted by anyone. My brother's wife said " You say you have lost weight yet you are far bigger than me". I was a UK size 16 at the time while she was a UK size 20. Funny ha! That was the end of March. Now I'm getting the "you are losing so much weight, eating disorder thing. Eh, I'm very I'll and doctors are puzzled about what is causing my pain and discomfort. Anywho, life goes on.
  • rushfive
    rushfive Posts: 603 Member
    Options
    No mean commits to me..
    Did have my m'i'l ask last week if I had lost weight. I was in my workout cloths tho, usually I am in jeans and t'shirt/sweatshirt (baggy/comfy) :smile:

    My hubby has said a few times I look nice in some cloths I was wearing. I don't even think he realizes I even lost 25 pounds. 2 pound from goal now. We eat the same foods, me just less. I do have to say he sees me every day so probably not noticeable.
  • booksandchocolate12
    booksandchocolate12 Posts: 1,741 Member
    Options
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    chicks are mean...srsly...95% of the personnel problems I have to deal with at the office are females fighting with each other or unhappy because so and so said such and such and, "I'm not talkin' to that *kitten* any more" kind of *kitten*.

    Do we work together? ;)
  • Mountaingirl33
    Mountaingirl33 Posts: 80 Member
    Options
    Both my mother and MIL told me to stop at bmi of 20.9 ( MIL added "because I'm gaining!). .
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,372 Member
    Options
    Still overweight... that I was too skinny and needed to stop losing. I'm 20 pounds lighter now and still hear it, obviously (from about everyone).
  • shinisize
    shinisize Posts: 105 Member
    Options
    I've heard a number of nasty comments from women about how I'm "not fat and will be skin and bones at 15lbs lighter", which would be the top of the 'healthy' range. They all had babies much earlier than I did and have been hovering in the 'obese' range ever since, so trimming back to my pre-baby weight is a threat to their claim that all moms are chunksters (gotta love small town mentality).
    On the other side of the coin, many years ago I had a couple of guy friends take me aside when I had hit the low end of the 'healthy' range and express concern because I was starting to get some serious upper chest rib shadow. They were very relieved to find out I was already eating more to compensate for having picked up working a second active job plus having a very active lifestyle. Why can't women be nicer like that?
  • malibu927
    malibu927 Posts: 17,565 Member
    Options
    Not really mean, but I had one coworker question someone whether I was sick because I was losing (this was at around 200 pounds), and her mother-in-law (a former coworker herself whom I'm close with) asked me the same thing a month ago at 187.
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,575 Member
    Options
    My boss told me she could count my teeth through my cheeks when I first got into a healthy BMI. Someone the other day told me I look like I have an eating disorder, at 5'4" and 132 lbs. People always tell me I'm "disappearing" and to stop losing weight, which isn't mean but annoying.
  • Wiseandcurious
    Wiseandcurious Posts: 730 Member
    Options
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    at no point...

    given the number of times I've read through threads like this, I've largely deduced that this is a female thing...

    Don't think so, I'm female and it never happened to me at any weight in my life. Never a mean comment from anyone. Either I'm lucky or I never notice it.
  • ogmomma2012
    ogmomma2012 Posts: 1,520 Member
    Options
    Everyone at work has watched me explode to 262, and are nothing but positive now that I am 194. I sure hope things will stay the same when I get to a healthy BMI.
  • CooCooPuff
    CooCooPuff Posts: 4,374 Member
    Options
    My parents called me gorda throughout my childhood and would often put me on diets and try to make me exercise. Ugg, there was particular workout tape my dad would rent from the library where the hose would pretend to be different animals and tell the kids in the audience to follow his movements. Having to follow the tape in front of him is probably my earliest embarrassing moment.

    The only person who has really said anything negative about my weight loss is my mom, but she complains about everything. Most of what random folks / friends / family have commented negatively on is my diet, things like using a food scale at home, splitting my meal in half, and ordering smaller portions.
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 24,883 Member
    edited June 2015
    Options
    No one has made any comments to me one way or the other ... almost 15 kg lost, and not a word.

    But then, I'm in an office where I've never heard anyone comment on another person's appearance except maybe the occasional "Oh, I like your necklace" or "Great boots!" or something like that. :)

    I'm also in a very active office ... seems like just about everyone works out, cycles, runs, goes for long walks and/or multi-day hikes, rows, etc. etc.
  • IAmTheGlue
    IAmTheGlue Posts: 701 Member
    Options
    shell1005 wrote: »
    IAmTheGlue wrote: »
    People don't say mean things to me either. I am just not particularly approachable. If anyone ever did say something mean, I either never heard it or just disregarded it because I have no recollection of it.

    I did however have an intervention once due when I dropped weight very fast after my 2nd child was born due to said disordered eating. It's been a problem on and off since 6th grade. I was well under a healthy weight and making myself quite sick.

    It was not mean, though. It was purely out of concern and they were absolutely correct. I couldn't hear it then and it was not until I landed myself in the Dr's office a couple weeks later that I realized the problems I was causing myself.

    I think overall that people have a hard time seeing people who are at a healthy weight as healthy due to the obesity epidemic. It is like an unhealthy high weight looks normal now and a healthy weight looks underweight.

    I think more than that...it is people having a hard time adjusting to seeing a person who used to be overweight/obese as a normal body weight. If I was always a normal body weight, no one would think a thing of it, but because I was overweight and now I have lost weight...it is a transition that people have to adjust how they view me, so I think many people resist against that.

    I would hypothesize strongly that if people were always the weight they are when people started saying "you are too thin" or "you look like skin and bones" that people wouldn't think about saying that in the slightest.

    P.S. Glad to hear you are healthier and doing better. Hugs. I'm glad your family said something and reached out.

    Thanks :)

    What you said makes sense, too. People hate change.
  • gerbillama03
    gerbillama03 Posts: 19 Member
    Options
    Overweight.

    I have heard comments on my figure my whole life. I'm a petite female (5'1) and am well-endowed. I hear people tell me I'm too big, and other people tell me I shouldn't try to lose any weight at all. I'm about twenty pounds north of my goal weight, and it's very hard for me because people say either that I don't eat, or that I'm eating too much (nobody understands my diet but me). And I also never look like I'm losing weight, because I lose it evenly and it's spread out evenly.

    I have wide hips, and I always will. I've been a size zero and I've been a size eight, and everything in between. People are rude to me, but I just keep on going.
  • blueyellowhorse
    blueyellowhorse Posts: 708 Member
    Options
    at 25-26.5 BMI which is overweight but not by a lot, I've had comments like "fat pig" "you're disgusting" "ew" "gross" "whale" "DUFF"(designated ugly fat friend) and other mean things that I can't think of. I'm only 19 and comments like those really hurt and I know everyone says to ignore them but that is so much easier said than done. I'm at 23.3 normal BMI right now and everyone has been really positive about my weight loss and have said I look great! :)
  • Nerdycurls
    Nerdycurls Posts: 143 Member
    Options
    Obese, to overweight to High BMI, to Mid BMI.

    My mother was the WORST with mean. I'm 5'4". At the time I was about 135 pounds and yes, I did have some love handles at the side and yes I did have a little bit of a belly. I knew it, but at the time I had no idea how to even start losing weight healthily. My mom would poke my fat and tell me I needed to lose weight, and then comment on how big my shoulders were/are, how my behind didn't match, etc.

    When I was high BMI, my mom kept making comments and they got worse when I was obese. I probably wasn't considered medically obese, but it was the absolute heaviest I have ever been in my life. My mom complained to my relatives and I even had them calling me saying "is it true?" Seriously, of all the things to call someone up on and ask (sighs).

    Due to PCOS, my health got worse and when the periods got so bad I said screw this. I decided to lose weight before I ended up bleeding out on the toilet or something (sorry if that was TMI). My mom kept telling me to lose more weight. After I lost my job a couple years back I gained back a lot of weight and she continued telling me I was fat. One time she said it during a holiday when we had guests and wow, was that embarrassing. It made me feel like scarfing down a danish or something.

    On the flip side, when I was at my lightest-- below 155 pounds-- people at work flipped out on me. Told me a dress size below 10 was "too skinny" (yes...you did read that right). One coworker actually told me (paraphrasing) my body and hair wouldn't look balanced. Yes...she said something like that. I must have given her a look because that is one of the MOST bizarre things you can tell a person.

    Honestly? I wish people would keep their opinions about someone's body to themselves when they are trying to lose weight for their health. Try being supportive for a change. Just because a person loses 30 pounds doesn't mean they lost 30% of their sanity. Sheesh.
  • lauraesh0384
    lauraesh0384 Posts: 463 Member
    Options
    It wasn't mean, but I think it was said out of insecurity. When I was with my boyfriend at the time and I went from 200 to 180, he told me he'd leave me if I got skinny. He said he didn't like skinny women. Being 5'6" and my goal weight is 150, I don't think I'll be "skinny". I just want to be lean and toned. To this day I'm not sure if he was kidding or not, but who says that to someone that's trying to better themselves? Obviously we're not together anymore. I eventually had enough of his crap.
  • JPW1990
    JPW1990 Posts: 2,424 Member
    Options
    lauraesh0384 wrote: »
    It wasn't mean, but I think it was said out of insecurity. When I was with my boyfriend at the time and I went from 200 to 180, he told me he'd leave me if I got skinny. He said he didn't like skinny women. Being 5'6" and my goal weight is 150, I don't think I'll be "skinny". I just want to be lean and toned. To this day I'm not sure if he was kidding or not, but who says that to someone that's trying to better themselves? Obviously we're not together anymore. I eventually had enough of his crap.

    Someone who either has control issues or a fetish.

Categories