Why losing weight feels so effortless for me this time around.
elleelise
Posts: 33 Member
Former binge eater and experienced yo-yo dieter here (but luckily reformed after two hard years of work with an intuitive eating/body image counselor.)
In the past weight loss was such an epic struggle and always ended up in failure after two or three weeks despite being a discliplined and successful woman in all other areas of my life. However upon starting my weight loss journey in April (tracking as of June) I found that a couple of very important intentions and habits are making ALL the difference. I am 1.8 pounds from 15 lost and it makes my goal of 40 feel SO doable.
Here is what I've gleaned this time around. Take it with a grain of salt, or take it to heart if it resonates with you:
1. You gotta love yourself before you ever begin to weigh your food or track your calories. If your intention to lose weight comes from a place of self loathing versus self love, you are setting yourself up for failure and heartache. Yes, even if you are a size 26 and 350 pounds ladies. Negative emotions don't help. We (females) are inundated with a disgusting number of negative body messages on a daily basis, so it is easy to fall into a very unhealthy conversation with ourselves about our bodies. Even in my conditioning class my instructor recently tried to motivate us by saying "Think about how bikini worthy you'll be and push on!" At this point I raised my hand and explained that I am already bikini worthy and ready at a jiggly size 16, as were all the other women in the room. Enjoy life now and don't put it off until you reach a goal weight. Challenge these messages. Grow to appreciate yourself and want to care for yourself first. Took me two years to learn this and for me, it was the most important step, and the most challenging one.
2. Move first, track second. This may go against 99% of people here, but my argument for getting moving first is that restricting your calories doesn't always FEEL good intitially but movement does (at least for me...) Movement and being active boosts your mood and makes you feel strong and accomplished at any stage in your body. When you work out it also has positive ripple effects relating to nutrition, sleep, water intake. Healthy habits trump being in a smaller body except in extreme cases, so focus on habits and health first, weight/physical mass second in my humble opinion.
3. Don't overthink it. Track your food. Weigh what you can. Stick within your daily caloric targets 90-95% of the time. And have it come from a place of self love and compassion, not hatred and punishment. And if you strumble, no biggie. Don't punish yourself or make it mean more than it is.
4. Don't villiainize foods. Cookies are not bad. You are not "good" for eating kale. Being paleo or primal or "clean" isn't the holy grail. Strip these stupid food rules away. If you want a brownie, make it work for your calories. Every food has a place in a well rounded deficit and diet. Guilt has no place in a well rounded diet however.
5. Don't place time constraits on your weight loss journey. Be flexible, be patient and enjoy the journey instead of trying to rush to the finish line. In the past I would always set up specific goals relating to weight or measurements, and this would always contribute to a sense of disappointment and self hatred at "failing." Just don't do it. Plan to be here for a long, long time and find a way to love the process more than the product.
6. Notice if you are in a binge-guilt-restrict-lose weight-binge-guilt-etc... eating pattern. If so, it'll take more than yet another diet program or calorie counting goal to work through. Disordered eating is rampant in our society. I would argue that a huge population of people on these threads have disordered eating and are totally unaware. If you do suffer from negative body image, binge eating disorder, yo-yo dieting addition, obsession with food, the answer won't be weight loss and you should confront those inner deamons and psychological aspects prior to counting calories and trying to get leaner and smaller.
Just my two cents! Hope this helps someone.
In the past weight loss was such an epic struggle and always ended up in failure after two or three weeks despite being a discliplined and successful woman in all other areas of my life. However upon starting my weight loss journey in April (tracking as of June) I found that a couple of very important intentions and habits are making ALL the difference. I am 1.8 pounds from 15 lost and it makes my goal of 40 feel SO doable.
Here is what I've gleaned this time around. Take it with a grain of salt, or take it to heart if it resonates with you:
1. You gotta love yourself before you ever begin to weigh your food or track your calories. If your intention to lose weight comes from a place of self loathing versus self love, you are setting yourself up for failure and heartache. Yes, even if you are a size 26 and 350 pounds ladies. Negative emotions don't help. We (females) are inundated with a disgusting number of negative body messages on a daily basis, so it is easy to fall into a very unhealthy conversation with ourselves about our bodies. Even in my conditioning class my instructor recently tried to motivate us by saying "Think about how bikini worthy you'll be and push on!" At this point I raised my hand and explained that I am already bikini worthy and ready at a jiggly size 16, as were all the other women in the room. Enjoy life now and don't put it off until you reach a goal weight. Challenge these messages. Grow to appreciate yourself and want to care for yourself first. Took me two years to learn this and for me, it was the most important step, and the most challenging one.
2. Move first, track second. This may go against 99% of people here, but my argument for getting moving first is that restricting your calories doesn't always FEEL good intitially but movement does (at least for me...) Movement and being active boosts your mood and makes you feel strong and accomplished at any stage in your body. When you work out it also has positive ripple effects relating to nutrition, sleep, water intake. Healthy habits trump being in a smaller body except in extreme cases, so focus on habits and health first, weight/physical mass second in my humble opinion.
3. Don't overthink it. Track your food. Weigh what you can. Stick within your daily caloric targets 90-95% of the time. And have it come from a place of self love and compassion, not hatred and punishment. And if you strumble, no biggie. Don't punish yourself or make it mean more than it is.
4. Don't villiainize foods. Cookies are not bad. You are not "good" for eating kale. Being paleo or primal or "clean" isn't the holy grail. Strip these stupid food rules away. If you want a brownie, make it work for your calories. Every food has a place in a well rounded deficit and diet. Guilt has no place in a well rounded diet however.
5. Don't place time constraits on your weight loss journey. Be flexible, be patient and enjoy the journey instead of trying to rush to the finish line. In the past I would always set up specific goals relating to weight or measurements, and this would always contribute to a sense of disappointment and self hatred at "failing." Just don't do it. Plan to be here for a long, long time and find a way to love the process more than the product.
6. Notice if you are in a binge-guilt-restrict-lose weight-binge-guilt-etc... eating pattern. If so, it'll take more than yet another diet program or calorie counting goal to work through. Disordered eating is rampant in our society. I would argue that a huge population of people on these threads have disordered eating and are totally unaware. If you do suffer from negative body image, binge eating disorder, yo-yo dieting addition, obsession with food, the answer won't be weight loss and you should confront those inner deamons and psychological aspects prior to counting calories and trying to get leaner and smaller.
Just my two cents! Hope this helps someone.
33
Replies
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Coming from a place of positivity has made this a whole different journey for me. Instead of feeling like I'm depriving myself of glorious treats, I'm instead giving my body the gift of strength and allowing it to function at it's potential. I'm so grateful my body can function like it's supposed to (mostly) so I'm showing it gratitude by taking care of it.2
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Solid post, especially items 3, 4 and 5. Keep it up and good luck.0
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@elleelise Thank you; great post! Wish you the best!0
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Great post, wishing you continued success.0
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Love this post! I am focusing on ADDING things into my diet this time around as opposed to DEPRIVING myself. Getting to try new foods is exciting, and feel like hitting the jackpot when I find a new food I like. I am looking at weight loss as a side effect of my new lifestyle as opposed to the goal. Way to keep it positive!2
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Oh. My. Goodness. Someone put it into words!!!! Thank you!!0
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Amazing post. Huzzah to you!0
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This is true for me as well:2. Move first, track second. This may go against 99% of people here, but my argument for getting moving first is that restricting your calories doesn't always FEEL good initially but movement does (at least for me...) Movement and being active boosts your mood and makes you feel strong and accomplished at any stage in your body. When you work out it also has positive ripple effects relating to nutrition, sleep, water intake. Healthy habits trump being in a smaller body except in extreme cases, so focus on habits and health first, weight/physical mass second in my humble opinion.
Now, am I going to take the afternoon off and go swimming or stay here...?2 -
Great post
I only slightly disagree number 2. Not because it can't work, but because we see so many people that get angry/frustrated and quit when they focus on exercise first but place their diet on the back burner.0 -
^^ I was just about to quote the exact same section.
Moving certainly makes me feel good. And the more I move, the more I want to move.
Thanks for a great post.0 -
Spot on!0
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Well said!!!!!!1
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Awesome post. Just about all of these things are what has helped me so much, especially this time around.
I have "rewards" planned for each 5lb i lose but i start to get impatient with my weight loss. Your post is making me rethink them.
I see where you're coming from and in many cases you are right but I think it depends on the way you go about it. I started my current p90x3 regimen knowing that i wasn't going to lose weight doing just that, but after doing it for a month or two I started to feel better and at that point felt confident/good enough to really start looking at my diet/eating habits.Great post
I only slightly disagree number 2. Not because it can't work, but because we see so many people that get angry/frustrated and quit when they focus on exercise first but place their diet on the back burner.1 -
Very insightful! Thanks for the wisdom, and congratulations on the healthier, happier you! I know I'm on a pattern but have focused on making the "restrict, lose" portion of my cycle permanent, rather than eradicating the pattern in the first place. How silly! Thank you for your help.0 -
This is a wonderful post -another former (hopefully) binge eater0
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Great post! There is so much more to this journey for me than food.
Striving so hard to work for #1 !
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Beautifully said!0
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Former yo yo dieter here for many years and this whole posts puts into words what I try to tell people about losing weight. Amazing So cliche to say but it really is a journey to find yourself, not just change how you look on the outside. 2
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I love this post. (And as someone who finally feels on the right track after YEARS, I'll join the feel-good train. My whole mindset about myself has changed, even if the scale hasn't changed that much - yet.)0
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Something to consider--thanks for the post! So glad things feel easier for you this time!0
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Congrats!
I wish it were effortless for me! Maybe one day. 0 -
Great post
I only slightly disagree number 2. Not because it can't work, but because we see so many people that get angry/frustrated and quit when they focus on exercise first but place their diet on the back burner.
I get what you're saying, but in my personal experience, making it a habit to exercise 3-5 times a week seemed easier/more appealing in the beginning. Once that became a habit for me, focusing on improving my eating habits came easily. I find that a few of my real life friends (who are actively trying to lose weight) struggle with changing their food habits. I think unrealistic expectations are at fault in both of our examples. Adding exercise first shouldn't be the first and last step (I'm assuming that that's why some people are getting frustrated), that is true.... but it can sound more appealing than weighing and tracking all of your food first. Annnd I'm done rambling.
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Love this post! It's so important to recognize the importance of your own journey & the fact that it won't look the same as anyone else's. I started mine Jan 2014 & wanted to lose 50lbs by Dec 2014. It was doable & realistic technically, but I realized quickly that I couldn't force it. Instead, it has taken me a year & a half to lose 30lbs. You have to do you and take your time with it, figuring out what works for you and what doesn't. Keep track of your emotional & mental health & take breaks when necessary. Do what you need to do, be realistic, & enjoy the journey!1
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yep, idk how many times i had binge guilt. it was an emotional ride but ive stopped because I found a way to enjoy what I eat, which is eating whatever I want without guilt and filling myself with good nutrition to make me feel good. Once I felt my life turned around, I didn't want to go back, I took control back0
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I kind of get where you're coming from on #2. It depends on the person, though, which I acknowledge fully. Moving can help with a sense of pride and accomplishment, it can decrease stress, and it can help with circulation and muscle problems. Plus, it obviously helped you in your journey and that's awesome!
My only concern is when super-heavy people or those inexperienced with exercise try to move too hard and too fast too soon. That can lead to injury. Once more, if this is all they're doing to lose weight, they might be a bit disappointed and lose their motivation when the scale jumps down on that first week (when the glycogen spill happens) and then doesn't budge.
The rest of the post is very strong. And admittedly, some of these are lessons I've only recently learned after a lifetime of trying to lose. I particularly liked your inclusion of #6. Some times, weight loss is more about what's going on in the head than it is about what's going on in the body.0 -
I 100% agree with this post. It makes me feel good because this is how I've been feeling. The obsessive feeling is gone and replaced by appreciation: for my body, for my own strength and fortitude, and for good, satisfying food!2
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FoxyLifter wrote: »Great post
I only slightly disagree number 2. Not because it can't work, but because we see so many people that get angry/frustrated and quit when they focus on exercise first but place their diet on the back burner.
I get what you're saying, but in my personal experience, making it a habit to exercise 3-5 times a week seemed easier/more appealing in the beginning. Once that became a habit for me, focusing on improving my eating habits came easily. I find that a few of my real life friends (who are actively trying to lose weight) struggle with changing their food habits. I think unrealistic expectations are at fault in both of our examples. Adding exercise first shouldn't be the first and last step (I'm assuming that that's why some people are getting frustrated), that is true.... but it can sound more appealing than weighing and tracking all of your food first. Annnd I'm done rambling.
I want different foods when I exercise regularly. I don't know if this is because exercise puts me more in touch with what my body really wants or if there is an actual change. When I pay attention, the foods I want are those that help me eat at a deficit.
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I have been losing 1-2 pounds a week since March 8th. Started on MFP in May. I was expecting weight loss to be so much more difficult than it has been. I think it is because my head and heart are in the right place this time. I keep waiting for the hard part to hit, the plateau, the days when I go to bed hungry, etc. but it hasn't happened. I am really after health benefits this time and appearance is just a bonus. Thanks for the post and I hope for a continuing ease in your journey.0
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Nice post OP.......
I wish I could have those insights when I first started, it would have made life so much the easier.
Well done and I wish you continued success.0 -
This topic's OP is a beautiful thing. Bookmarked. 0
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