Prison!

itshannahlol

The person above you is in prison, what is it for?!

zcb94

^flirted her way out of paying a rightfully given ticket.

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Pyramid scheme.

MShayne2414

3RD Degree Burglary & Lewd conduct----burglarized a D i L D O manufacturing plant...the police caught him 5 miles down the road with his pants down. A 12" black one in the dome and a 14 incher in the Ol poop shoot...the temptation got the best of him.

Jk bud!! But....seriously though

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Was supposed to be my getaway driver, but his mom wouldn't let him leave the house. He pushed her down the stairs but it didn't finish the job so she pressed charges.

Also I wasn't super impressed with the 14 inch, needs more girth I think.

MShayne2414

Michael_Lucas wrote: »

Was supposed to be my getaway driver, but his mom wouldn't let him leave the house. He pushed her down the stairs but it didn't finish the job so she pressed charges.

Also I wasn't super impressed with the 14 inch, needs more girth I think.

Bwhahahahahaha!!! Yes!!! Love someone with a sense of humor! Lol

Your second stint in prison is cause:

You always wanted a real life "Jack in a Box," so you went to local circus. After the show, you kidnapped one of the clowns and kept him in your trunk tied up. Each time you would open your trunk he would raise his head up as if he wanted out, you would therefore, hit him over the head with one of your many large D i L D O S and close the trunk. You were charged with: assault & battery/ kidnapping lol

Spnneil06

Public nudity, not just once, but 50 times!

Bakins929

Went to mental wing of prison for running a D i L D O obsession website.

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Was caught trying to commit insurance fraud. He insured his neighbors house in his name and tried to start a fire with his neighbor inside. The weird lady who is always watching the neighborhood from her window saw the whole thing and reported it.

Spnneil06

beastiality towards ducks.

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

The Bruce Jenner/Kendall Jenner thing gave her the idea to "sex change" her old boyfriends. She was caught when she posted the before and after pictures on facebook. Only 2 of them survived.

MShayne2414

@Spnneil06 was arrested today after a high speed chase with police. She is charged with Grand Theft Auto, Eluding Police & Wreckless Driving.

She reportedly stole a 1994 White Ford Bronco from a nearby used dealership.

When arrested the only comment she made was, "FREE O. J!!"

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

@MShayne2414 is back in prison after escaping. He tunneled out and went through the sewers, a week later with a state-wide manhunt in effect he was caught spraypainting the walls of the prison with things like "Suck it warden" and "They can never take my freedom."

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Mr_Stabbems

assaulting farm animals

hornseyme

Sodomy

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Was caught naked in that position trying to give himself autofilatio in front of a kindergarten.

zcb94

Failure to pay a speeding ticket

softblondechick

Stealing candy from a baby. He had been doing LCHF, saw the candy, had a "sugar crave", and ripped the sucker right out of the baby's mouth.

It was a toss up...prison or mental institution. Prison won, as the mental institution felt the other patients would be unsafe.

blueyellowhorse

killed a black cat because the cat gave her bad luck, she wanted revenge.

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Started a high speed pursuit after cutting off a cop. The chase lasted 9 hours and went across 3 states. She was finally caught when she got out of her car stripped naked and ran into a 7-11 where she tried to take the person behind the counter hostage. When asked why she did it her response was, "I just wanted to be on T.V."

Luke_I_am_your_spotter

licking strangers while on parole

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Alluminati

Michael_Lucas wrote: »

Was supposed to be my getaway driver, but his mom wouldn't let him leave the house. He pushed her down the stairs but it didn't finish the job so she pressed charges.

Also I wasn't super impressed with the 14 inch, needs more girth I think.

I see you edited yourself. Wise choice.

Spnneil06

Pick pocketed the elderly.

TheBeerRunner

Stabbed Taylor Swift

Spnneil06

TheBeerRunner wrote: »

Stabbed Taylor Swift

Only after he kidnapped her and I was trying to protect her.

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

She was caught trying to fix a horse race. She would have gotten away with it if she hadn't given a long shot too much adrenaline causing its heart to stop during a race. After an investigation they checked video footage and caught her!

PapaPeace

Stealing beanie babies from Prince.

BaconBae

Got caught kidnapping the female MFPs on his friends list and keeping them in his hidden dungeon behind his bookcase. His dungeon was full of exercise equipment and he forced them to exercise incessantly because he loved watching them sweat.