The emotional aspects of a large weight loss
Options
Replies
-
NikiChicken wrote: »Congratulations and fantastic job on all of your hard work! What an achievement. You should be so proud of yourself...
Wow. I wrote a book! Sorry about that. Congratulations again! Your accomplishment is fantastic and you should be proud!
No need to apologize and thank you. I love hearing others' stories. At first, I didn't want to share either, but as I lost more weight, and more people were telling me how I was inspiring them, I felt it was my duty to share.
Great job on your weight loss too!0 -
-
Wow! Very inspiring! Great way to turn a negative (losing your Dad) into a positive (becoming so healthy)! At my heaviest I was almost 400 pounds. I am now down to 332 and am working my way down slowly. Any advice on maintaining? I have slipped several times and gained back weight I had lost. I think I've got a better handle on things this time around and am trying to make permanent lifestyle changes vs. "dieting" but love to hear from people who've accomplished their goal and how they maintain after that. Thanks for sharing!
Thanks! And you're right, I had to turn that very negative experience into something positive. My advice on maintaining is that you need to look at this as a lifestyle change, not a diet or exercise plan. When a person gets as big as I was, I needed to do something different.
I can't explain all of the details here, but in short if you reduce what you eat and increase your activity over time, you should see results.
Friend request me if you're interested. We can chat more.0 -
You= amazing! #congrats \O/0
-
caroldavison332 wrote: »People are illogical. Some hate your success, are jealous, want to be the prettier friend, etc. The sooner we stop trying to figure the knuckleheads out, and make room for the healthy loving ones, the happier we will be.
I know. People keep telling me to stop listening. It was hardest when it came from a couple of people close to me, but I had to step back and realize the place they were coming from. And you're right, I am making new friends on here with like-minded attitudes!0 -
Reactions? How about, "oh you are starting to look too skinny? At 219 lbs/5'5 wtffff it kills me everytime
0 -
-
Generally, those negative people are the loudest and therefore the easiest to find and get rid of! Great advice. I live by this as well.
For most I can do this, but unfortunately a few I cannot get rid of. I just need to handle them differently or not engage in these conversations.0 -
You successfully lost a lot of weight in a short amount of time.
Most of the people that are close to you and that you care about will catch up with the new version of you. They need some time. If in a year from now you still hear that b.s., you can dump them (even if they are family members and long time friends).0 -
msharrington315 wrote: »Having been morbid and super obese since early adulthood, I had a lot of emotions wrapped up in all the fat my body was carrying. I was ashamed of my body and myself and eventually to the point of giving up the will to live. Compound this with all of the co-morbidities I had developed: pre-diabetic, high blood pressure, sleep apnea, gastric reflux, fungal infections...
.
I would love to know if you still have sleep apnea, or not as bad? I was diagnosed with sleep apnea last year. In the last 19 months I have lost over 140, and on a week from Thursday I am having my sleep apnea retested. I still have about 20-40 pounds to go, but I would like not to be stuck on a CPAP machine for the rest of my life
0 -
msharrington315 wrote: »
to be quite honest this is the first time I'm doing this for me, I tried the whole tell everyone around you to keep you challenge or the motivation up and it didn't worked; too much people having too much to say! so this time around I haven't told anyone but my really close family who sees me everyday, of course it helps a lot that I'm not currently in my home country but everyday I wake up thinking, gosh I should maybe post a picture in my FB or instagram, but don't know what is stopping me, is like inside I'm kind scare of people reactions IDK, like I'm waiting to be in my safe/comfort zone, I don't know if I'm ready for the questions of 'wow how much you've lost and how much you weight now (still over 200 lbs)
and the how have you done it part? I don't how to explain people outside mfp that I still eat rice/bread/oatmeal and food like that every single day!
They want to hear only lettuce and meat! is like I want to be helpful but don't know how sometimes.
on the other side with the opposite sex, I would never expected or believe others ladies when they write about this but man are sort of nicer with me and I feel so insecure when they hit on me, oh lord is like I'm a kid and want to run away
umm I still look my self in the mirror and my mind haven't got used to the reflection and there are def. days when I wake up feeling so like the old me, and when I go shopping ohhh you know that I still go and pick the big sizes.
Other than that my close family is really happy for me, I come from a very morbidly obese family and what I can tell is that they feel proud of me and so weird like protective , for example I don't eat ice cream too often, even before my weight loss I didn't, and a couple days ago I got ice cream and served my self a cup and all of them were like mad, like hell no Kary, drop that ice cream, ice cream is bad, we want you to keep doing good, I don't know how to described it but is was so sweet!
so sorry if it is too long to read, hope it answers your question!0 -
For me, everyone has been very complimentary on my weight loss. I have lost 45 pounds in the past 11 months, with another 15 to go. I don't like a lot of attention regarding my weight loss as I am embarrassed about how I used to look, but I am very gracious when complimented.
As for haters, only one. At work. She is old enough to be my mother, so age...I don't know if that has anything to do with it. I am now 1 to 2 dress sizes smaller than her.
She talks constantly to coworkers about my weight loss, to the point where coworkera say she is obsessed. She has even suggested things to others like I have had Bariatric surgery, on a doctor's diet, on drugs (prescription and maybe illegal). She remarks on anything I put in my mouth. She makes "compliments" that are really snide, like, "Oh, everyone says you're losing weight. I NEVER noticed. I guess you have." The best...she tells everyone another girl at work is my "twin" and always has "to do a double take" when she sees this girl because she thinks it's me. This girl looks nothing like me except we both have similar hair color. That is it. But, this girl is about 100 pounds heavier than I am, so I know the hater says this as a jab.
And I don't care. I think it's hilarious actually. She just makes herself look like a royal a**.0 -
And OP...congrats on your amazing success!0
-
jenniferplatter wrote: »As for haters, only one. At work. She is old enough to be my mother, so age...I don't know if that has anything to do with it. I am now 1 to 2 dress sizes smaller than her.
She talks constantly to coworkers about my weight loss, to the point where coworkera say she is obsessed. She has even suggested things to others like I have had Bariatric surgery, on a doctor's diet, on drugs (prescription and maybe illegal). She remarks on anything I put in my mouth. She makes "compliments" that are really snide, like, "Oh, everyone says you're losing weight. I NEVER noticed. I guess you have." The best...she tells everyone another girl at work is my "twin" and always has "to do a double take" when she sees this girl because she thinks it's me. This girl looks nothing like me except we both have similar hair color. That is it. But, this girl is about 100 pounds heavier than I am, so I know the hater says this as a jab.
And I don't care. I think it's hilarious actually. She just makes herself look like a royal a**.
LOL-She is ridiculous! I figure the hateful comments reveal more about the speaker than the subject, so I ignore them, but I never ran into one like this!
0 -
I agree that people who react negatively are the ones with the issue, although it can be challenging when you already have had self-esteem issues for so many years. Don't get me wrong, I definitely feel better about my appearance, but I can tell you that one person very close to me said some things that threw me for a loop for a few days. I had to do a lot of reflection and realize that, yes, it is not me who has the issue, but the person delivering the message. I saved my life and am in better health... what is wrong with that??
The bonus part of all of this for me is now I am getting a chance to help others. I have lost track of how many people who have told me that I have helped them or someone they know get motivated to take care of their own health. This too is an esteem boost and it gives me fuel to stay on track and continue to progress.0 -
msharrington315 wrote: »
I was in top shape 15 years ago and just getting back into decent shape. Those who knew me from my military days see me about the same, but those who have known me since my civilian life are amazed. I'm tall and held my weight well I guess, so many didn't notice.0 -
msharrington315 wrote: »I never dreamed I would be here telling all of you that since June 2014 I have lost 209 pounds without surgery or being on a "diet". The feeling both physical and mental is amazing. And, as you can imagine, people around me are inspired by my accomplishment. This only motivates me more to continue on this journey.
Having been morbid and super obese since early adulthood, I had a lot of emotions wrapped up in all the fat my body was carrying. I was ashamed of my body and myself and eventually to the point of giving up the will to live. Compound this with all of the co-morbidities I had developed: pre-diabetic, high blood pressure, sleep apnea, gastric reflux, fungal infections...
I had a number of things that triggered me to lose all of this weight once and for all, but the biggest factor was the loss of my dad in 2010 to lung and colon cancer. He was a heavy smoker, drinker, and ate poorly. The event was so traumatic to us all that I told my mother that I wasn't going to let his death be in vain. We need to learn from his poor health habits.
After I lost a large portion of my weight I still felt "fat". I have read that many people felt that way after a large weight loss. Especially if you carried it for the majority of your life like I did. Now that I am "normal" I am starting to feel normal. But it is still taking time to adjust.
The other interesting thing that I had not considered when I embarked on this journey was how others react to me. The majority of people are very happy for me and inspired to take on their own health journey... because of me. But there are others who have had strange and even negative reactions towards me. I still find it puzzling, since I saved my own life and would think they would be happy for me.
I want to hear others' stories about your emotions and the reactions you have gotten from others after your weight losses.
0 -
How has it affected your relationship with your significant othet?0
-
I also relate to your post. My grandma had diabetes. She never changed her diet after her diagnosis and died after going through dialysis for 2 years and having one leg amputated. My grandpas both had heart disease (a quadruple bypass each). While they both lived into their 90s, watching one of them die slowly was something I won't ever forget. He had a 99% blockage and doctors said he could literally die any minute. He lived two more years, except by the end he couldn't even drink water, he had to drink this thick stuff.
I'd never had any indicators of any problems (low BP, good blood chemistry, no symptoms of diabetes); however, my diet was poor and my exercise was inconsistent at best. I started taking diet and exercise a lot more seriously as a preventative (and a bit for vanity reasons, it's true).
I've lost about 60 lbs overall. I'm sorry to say I have had some negative experiences, with two of my best friends. One accused/joked/suggested I had an eating disorder, but it was just once so I let it go. Another friend more recently made a comment "that sucks" when I said a size I fit into (because she was 'barely' that size anymore). I've never been one to compare myself to other people except maybe my sisters and mom (for reference), so her comment comparing us kind of shocked me. It really stung because my interpretation is that in her mind, I'm the "fat friend" and always will be. I was always overweight, even as a teen, so I understand that my appearance has changed dramatically to those who have known me my whole life. Still stings though.
Everyone else in my life has just said, "you look great" and left it at that, which I really appreciate.0 -
Your transformation is simply amazing!msharrington315 wrote: »Thank you. I think in some cases my loss makes others feel bad about themselves and their inability to lose weight.
Absolutely, I've noticed this myself; what's more I remember feeling this way a number of times over the years when I was at my heaviest.
0
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 391.3K Introduce Yourself
- 43.4K Getting Started
- 259.6K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.6K Food and Nutrition
- 47.3K Recipes
- 232.3K Fitness and Exercise
- 387 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.4K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 152.7K Motivation and Support
- 7.8K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.2K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.2K MyFitnessPal Information
- 22 News and Announcements
- 911 Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.3K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions