GNC burn 60
Replies
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WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »queenliz99 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »juggernaut1974 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »It already includes caffeine as the main ingredient, and it also suppresses appetite. Today I used it and it helped me work out without getting too tired. I already go to gym every day and burn 500 calories, and I eat 1200 calories a day. I just take supplements to make sure it works, because I try so hard. I am not looking for magic to happen, but I want to lose weight faster because some days I even gain weight even though I don't eat much.
So much wrong with all of this.
You should not be netting only 700 calories per day (though I'm highly suspect of a 500 calorie burn at the gym being accurate)
You should not expect weight loss to happen fast.
Daily fluctuations in weight are immaterial...focus on the long term trend.
Be sure you're weighing and measuring your food/calories accurately.
There is absolutely no need for any sort of appetite suppressant
I do one and half hours of ecliptic training machine every day till it makes 500 calories, then I stop. Why would I lie about it?
I use myfitnesspal app to measure my calories, I enter everything I eat there and obey its calculations. It says I have to eat at least 1200 calories, so I do. I am not going to eat more because I really want to lose weight. This week I lost 2,2 kg, and I want this pattern to continue.
To be fair here, I set the elliptical resistance at 17 out of 25, and can burn about 100 calories in 14 minutes at a decent speed (using HRM) Could I keep that up for 70 mins? Very very doubtful. So I would imagine you are probably overestimating
Burn 60 gives me energy and helps me continue working out for more than an hour without feeling tired. The only bad side affect is that my heart rate goes up to 150 sometimes.
Yep that would be bad!!
That's why from now on I will take it only 1 pill and in the morning not prior to workout, so that I will be able to control my heart rate from going too high. It will work like coffee but more effective.
Wait, so your heart rate was hitting 150 when exercising? Why is that bad? In hard sprints, I'll hit much higher than that. My steady state cardio pace is about 170-180 (according to the machines, which I don't fully trust).
If you're hitting 150 while resting, that is bad.
Either way, if you want the effect, just take caffeine. That is ALL you are getting from it. I mean, coffee is a natural source of caffeine, for that matter.0 -
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If you are burning 500 calories with exercise, the minimum you should be eating is 1700(1700-500=1200 net calories for day).
Keep eating the way you are, you will start losing your hair, could develop gallstones, and may cause damage to your heart. People who follow such low calorie diets usually only do so for a short time and while under a doctor's care. If you can't get through your workout without a pill, that is a sign your body needs more energy through calories, not chemicals.
Please read this link to learn about a woman who tried doing the hard exercise, little food route to lose weight, and learned why there is a much better way that is actually way more effective and healthy.0 -
If you are burning 500 calories with exercise, the minimum you should be eating is 1700(1700-500=1200 net calories for day).
Keep eating the way you are, you will start losing your hair, could develop gallstones, and may cause damage to your heart. People who follow such low calorie diets usually only do so for a short time and while under a doctor's care. If you can't get through your workout without a pill, that is a sign your body needs more energy through calories, not chemicals.
Please read this link to learn about a woman who tried doing the hard exercise, little food route to lose weight, and learned why there is a much better way that is actually way more effective and healthy.
Thank you for sharing the link it was helpful. I think I'll increase my diet 300 more calories, because tonight suddenly I got hungry, like super hungry, and ate so many things : olives, corn, bread, nuts, mandarins.... and I still feel hungry.
I will still take the pill, but in the mornings because I have trouble waking up, and going to my classes. It will give me the caffeine boost I need to go through my day. And before the work out, I'll take Tonalin CLA so that it helps burning fat. I read a lot about it and think it is harmless.
The reason I'm so obsessed with weight loss is my ex boyfriend. He told me to lose weight so many times, and then he dumped me. I just think I needed to be more physically attractive to him. I am even taking therapy on this issue.
Few years ago I was only 46 kg. I was looking like a miniature model, everything looked good on me. Then I started using psychiatric pills, and boom, I was suddenly 83 kg. It ruined me. In my school everyone takes care of themselves -they are skinny and good looking, and I feel fat and ugly.
I know paying so much attention to looks is not a good or healthy thinking. But I just want to be thin again. I want to get my bf back. I want to look confident in my clothes and my skin.
And that's why I am so impatient.0 -
VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »queenliz99 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »juggernaut1974 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »It already includes caffeine as the main ingredient, and it also suppresses appetite. Today I used it and it helped me work out without getting too tired. I already go to gym every day and burn 500 calories, and I eat 1200 calories a day. I just take supplements to make sure it works, because I try so hard. I am not looking for magic to happen, but I want to lose weight faster because some days I even gain weight even though I don't eat much.
So much wrong with all of this.
You should not be netting only 700 calories per day (though I'm highly suspect of a 500 calorie burn at the gym being accurate)
You should not expect weight loss to happen fast.
Daily fluctuations in weight are immaterial...focus on the long term trend.
Be sure you're weighing and measuring your food/calories accurately.
There is absolutely no need for any sort of appetite suppressant
I do one and half hours of ecliptic training machine every day till it makes 500 calories, then I stop. Why would I lie about it?
I use myfitnesspal app to measure my calories, I enter everything I eat there and obey its calculations. It says I have to eat at least 1200 calories, so I do. I am not going to eat more because I really want to lose weight. This week I lost 2,2 kg, and I want this pattern to continue.
To be fair here, I set the elliptical resistance at 17 out of 25, and can burn about 100 calories in 14 minutes at a decent speed (using HRM) Could I keep that up for 70 mins? Very very doubtful. So I would imagine you are probably overestimating
Burn 60 gives me energy and helps me continue working out for more than an hour without feeling tired. The only bad side affect is that my heart rate goes up to 150 sometimes.
Yep that would be bad!!
That's why from now on I will take it only 1 pill and in the morning not prior to workout, so that I will be able to control my heart rate from going too high. It will work like coffee but more effective.
Wait, so your heart rate was hitting 150 when exercising? Why is that bad? In hard sprints, I'll hit much higher than that. My steady state cardio pace is about 170-180 (according to the machines, which I don't fully trust).
If you're hitting 150 while resting, that is bad.
Either way, if you want the effect, just take caffeine. That is ALL you are getting from it. I mean, coffee is a natural source of caffeine, for that matter.
I am not really informed on it, but my friend said it was too much for a heart rate, so I thought it was. But I believe I have a weak heart, so it is a bir uncomfortable during workouts.0 -
UltimateRBF wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »juggernaut1974 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »juggernaut1974 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »It already includes caffeine as the main ingredient, and it also suppresses appetite. Today I used it and it helped me work out without getting too tired. I already go to gym every day and burn 500 calories, and I eat 1200 calories a day. I just take supplements to make sure it works, because I try so hard. I am not looking for magic to happen, but I want to lose weight faster because some days I even gain weight even though I don't eat much.
So much wrong with all of this.
You should not be netting only 700 calories per day (though I'm highly suspect of a 500 calorie burn at the gym being accurate)
You should not expect weight loss to happen fast.
Daily fluctuations in weight are immaterial...focus on the long term trend.
Be sure you're weighing and measuring your food/calories accurately.
There is absolutely no need for any sort of appetite suppressant
I do one and half hours of ecliptic training machine every day till it makes 500 calories, then I stop. Why would I lie about it?
I use myfitnesspal app to measure my calories, I enter everything I eat there and obey its calculations. It says I have to eat at least 1200 calories, so I do. I am not going to eat more because I really want to lose weight. This week I lost 2,2 kg, and I want this pattern to continue.
I do not think you are lying...I think those machines are highly inaccurate in reporting actual calories burned.
As to the rest, you REALLY need to re-evaluate your goals and how to lose weight in a healthy manner, because right now, you are headed for a health disaster.
What he said....really. My 7 year old might net around 1000 cals per day.
You're going down a path to crash and burn. You only have 35lbs to lose and you're trying to keep up a goal of 2.2 kg (almost 5lbs) per week. That's not smart, nor healthy.
But I am feeling good.. I eat when I am hungry, today I took more than 1300 cal but burned around 450 of it at the gym, so no problem about ir. I even eat chocolate and peanut butter on low dosages, I eat everything my body craves. I just spend 1.5 hours at the gym every day so my body will have enough muscle and burn fat.
Yeah, you're feeling good now. But that won't last.
You may be right I am not feeling ok tonight.0 -
WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »juggernaut1974 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »juggernaut1974 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »It already includes caffeine as the main ingredient, and it also suppresses appetite. Today I used it and it helped me work out without getting too tired. I already go to gym every day and burn 500 calories, and I eat 1200 calories a day. I just take supplements to make sure it works, because I try so hard. I am not looking for magic to happen, but I want to lose weight faster because some days I even gain weight even though I don't eat much.
So much wrong with all of this.
You should not be netting only 700 calories per day (though I'm highly suspect of a 500 calorie burn at the gym being accurate)
You should not expect weight loss to happen fast.
Daily fluctuations in weight are immaterial...focus on the long term trend.
Be sure you're weighing and measuring your food/calories accurately.
There is absolutely no need for any sort of appetite suppressant
I do one and half hours of ecliptic training machine every day till it makes 500 calories, then I stop. Why would I lie about it?
I use myfitnesspal app to measure my calories, I enter everything I eat there and obey its calculations. It says I have to eat at least 1200 calories, so I do. I am not going to eat more because I really want to lose weight. This week I lost 2,2 kg, and I want this pattern to continue.
I do not think you are lying...I think those machines are highly inaccurate in reporting actual calories burned.
As to the rest, you REALLY need to re-evaluate your goals and how to lose weight in a healthy manner, because right now, you are headed for a health disaster.
What he said....really. My 7 year old might net around 1000 cals per day.
You're going down a path to crash and burn. You only have 35lbs to lose and you're trying to keep up a goal of 2.2 kg (almost 5lbs) per week. That's not smart, nor healthy.
But I am feeling good.. I eat when I am hungry, today I took more than 1300 cal but burned around 450 of it at the gym, so no problem about ir. I even eat chocolate and peanut butter on low dosages, I eat everything my body craves. I just spend 1.5 hours at the gym every day so my body will have enough muscle and burn fat.
The posters with years of experience here definitely have no idea what they're talking about.
You're still eating less than my 7 year old, trying to keep up a totally unrealistic pace of 5lbs per week (it would borderline be unrealistic for someone with 3x your weight to lose), and are setting yourself up to crash....
But OK OP, you've got all the answers....honestly IMHO if you're netting less than 900 cals and "feel fine", I'm guessing there's a mistake in calories estimations some where.
Tonight I got so hungry and have a headache... I'll increase the calories in my diet.0 -
WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »I just think I needed to be more physically attractive to him.
I know paying so much attention to looks is not a good or healthy thinking. But I just want to be thin again. I want to get my bf back.
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In my experience, if I have a few low calorie/high exercise days in a week, it will 100% catch up with me. In that I will have a day where I don't want to leave the couch and I will overeat anything in sight. So not worth it!0
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WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »Wait, so your heart rate was hitting 150 when exercising? Why is that bad? In hard sprints, I'll hit much higher than that. My steady state cardio pace is about 170-180 (according to the machines, which I don't fully trust).
If you're hitting 150 while resting, that is bad.
Either way, if you want the effect, just take caffeine. That is ALL you are getting from it. I mean, coffee is a natural source of caffeine, for that matter.
I am not really informed on it, but my friend said it was too much for a heart rate, so I thought it was. But I believe I have a weak heart, so it is a bir uncomfortable during workouts.
In that case, you might want to check with a physician. In all likelihood, you are just experiencing normal discomfort. Cardio helps strengthen your heart, and it's not easy at first.
I don't care why your boyfriend dumped you. If he was denigrating you after choosing to date you, then you don't need that. He's a *kitten* at best, and probably a controlling dick. I've been through a tough time recently (relationship wise), and I am better off now. The key is not to blame yourself for another person's failings, even though it's tempting. I can tell you about it if you like, but it doesn't directly correlate.
Seriously, you don't need to put up with that kind of *kitten*. Sorry, guys with no sense of respect, or honor piss me off. Debasing your loved ones is the worst.0 -
I have nothing to add other than please don't take your boyfriend back! Show him what he can't have anymore, and let him live in his shallow selfish little world.0
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christinev297 wrote: »I have nothing to add other than please don't take your boyfriend back! Show him what he can't have anymore, and let him live in his shallow selfish little world.
This.
Seriously, there is such a better way to do this. There are people here who can help you learn how to be healthy and strong, and support you, and when you figure out how beautiful you are (inside and out and even more so because you fought this out the right way) -- then you can tell him to go to hell. Believe me I have been at "oh I just want him back" -- and I would have sworn I would never get over it -- but then you know what? I did. And I looked back and said "What the hell was wrong with me for even wanting him?" There is no revenge anywhere near as good as living well.
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Read The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf. Keep up the therapy. Do exercise in a way you enjoy and that makes you feel good and gives you time to clear your head. Try to think about yourself and what you need and want - and what besides being thin and having your boyfriend back would give you real pleasure. Think about what you love about yourself and what you want to accomplish. Get clear on your non-weight loss goals and you will find that you have a much healthier, more sustainable and effective approach to weight loss. Your boyfriend did a number on you and has impacted your self-esteem and it sounds like your social environment's not so great either. You need to get help and support to develop a much more reasonable sense of yourself and your goals.0
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OP, I just sent you a friend request but I think the system is bouncing it...
You're very focused on the scale number, and very motivated. Let me throw you a couple of ideas.
You can probably lose at a pretty good clip even doing it more sanely. But as a nurse just told me, "subcutaneous fat doesn't really weigh that much"....it's actually pretty fluffy. Losing that fast means a lot of muscle and guess what your heart's made of? So it takes a lot more weight loss to equal a really visible loss, even if the number is dropping faster. Plus, neither the ex or anyone else sees the number between your feet on the scale. They see you.
You're spending a lot of time at the gym. You could spend half of that 90 minutes a few days a week working a progressive strength training system hard. The first few weeks your scale weight will likely be slower to move, but that is just water retention in the muscles (which doesn't look at all bad). Adding a day or two a week of intensive interval training is likely to jumpstart you better than anything from GNC (although I am a big fan of vitamin B-12 having been deficient for a while). Again, lots of help here (MFP) on this.
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VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »queenliz99 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »juggernaut1974 wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »It already includes caffeine as the main ingredient, and it also suppresses appetite. Today I used it and it helped me work out without getting too tired. I already go to gym every day and burn 500 calories, and I eat 1200 calories a day. I just take supplements to make sure it works, because I try so hard. I am not looking for magic to happen, but I want to lose weight faster because some days I even gain weight even though I don't eat much.
So much wrong with all of this.
You should not be netting only 700 calories per day (though I'm highly suspect of a 500 calorie burn at the gym being accurate)
You should not expect weight loss to happen fast.
Daily fluctuations in weight are immaterial...focus on the long term trend.
Be sure you're weighing and measuring your food/calories accurately.
There is absolutely no need for any sort of appetite suppressant
I do one and half hours of ecliptic training machine every day till it makes 500 calories, then I stop. Why would I lie about it?
I use myfitnesspal app to measure my calories, I enter everything I eat there and obey its calculations. It says I have to eat at least 1200 calories, so I do. I am not going to eat more because I really want to lose weight. This week I lost 2,2 kg, and I want this pattern to continue.
To be fair here, I set the elliptical resistance at 17 out of 25, and can burn about 100 calories in 14 minutes at a decent speed (using HRM) Could I keep that up for 70 mins? Very very doubtful. So I would imagine you are probably overestimating
Burn 60 gives me energy and helps me continue working out for more than an hour without feeling tired. The only bad side affect is that my heart rate goes up to 150 sometimes.
Yep that would be bad!!
That's why from now on I will take it only 1 pill and in the morning not prior to workout, so that I will be able to control my heart rate from going too high. It will work like coffee but more effective.
Wait, so your heart rate was hitting 150 when exercising? Why is that bad? In hard sprints, I'll hit much higher than that. My steady state cardio pace is about 170-180 (according to the machines, which I don't fully trust).
If you're hitting 150 while resting, that is bad.
Either way, if you want the effect, just take caffeine. That is ALL you are getting from it. I mean, coffee is a natural source of caffeine, for that matter.
The quick formula for maximum heart rate is 220 - age, though sometimes broken up into age brackets - so for a 31 year old like yourself, 190. You don't want to hit 190, you want to normally stay at 85% of that or less for any sustained exercise which would be about 162.0 -
WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »If you are burning 500 calories with exercise, the minimum you should be eating is 1700(1700-500=1200 net calories for day).
Keep eating the way you are, you will start losing your hair, could develop gallstones, and may cause damage to your heart. People who follow such low calorie diets usually only do so for a short time and while under a doctor's care. If you can't get through your workout without a pill, that is a sign your body needs more energy through calories, not chemicals.
Please read this link to learn about a woman who tried doing the hard exercise, little food route to lose weight, and learned why there is a much better way that is actually way more effective and healthy.
Thank you for sharing the link it was helpful. I think I'll increase my diet 300 more calories, because tonight suddenly I got hungry, like super hungry, and ate so many things : olives, corn, bread, nuts, mandarins.... and I still feel hungry.
I will still take the pill, but in the mornings because I have trouble waking up, and going to my classes. It will give me the caffeine boost I need to go through my day. And before the work out, I'll take Tonalin CLA so that it helps burning fat. I read a lot about it and think it is harmless.
The reason I'm so obsessed with weight loss is my ex boyfriend. He told me to lose weight so many times, and then he dumped me. I just think I needed to be more physically attractive to him. I am even taking therapy on this issue.
Few years ago I was only 46 kg. I was looking like a miniature model, everything looked good on me. Then I started using psychiatric pills, and boom, I was suddenly 83 kg. It ruined me. In my school everyone takes care of themselves -they are skinny and good looking, and I feel fat and ugly.
I know paying so much attention to looks is not a good or healthy thinking. But I just want to be thin again. I want to get my bf back. I want to look confident in my clothes and my skin.
And that's why I am so impatient.
Try to change your focus from weight/skinny to healthy/strong.
And if the ex helps motivate you, fine, but only if it's for you; not for him. He doesn't deserve you.0 -
The quick formula for maximum heart rate is 220 - age, though sometimes broken up into age brackets - so for a 31 year old like yourself, 190. You don't want to hit 190, you want to normally stay at 85% of that or less for any sustained exercise which would be about 162.
Thanks for the information. I don't put much stock in linear equations as they pertain to individuals. It's probably a handy tool as it applies to averages, though. I also don't fully trust the machines (I have seen them give a readout because the sweat left on the sensors). Either way, I feel good at that rate. I don't feel stressed, or ill.
I was thinking about getting a heart rate chest strap, but I don't really need it. I just like numbers.
Still, even applying that formula, the OP should be well within her safe limits at 150 BPM.0 -
VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »The quick formula for maximum heart rate is 220 - age, though sometimes broken up into age brackets - so for a 31 year old like yourself, 190. You don't want to hit 190, you want to normally stay at 85% of that or less for any sustained exercise which would be about 162.
Thanks for the information. I don't put much stock in linear equations as they pertain to individuals. It's probably a handy tool as it applies to averages, though. I also don't fully trust the machines (I have seen them give a readout because the sweat left on the sensors). Either way, I feel good at that rate. I don't feel stressed, or ill.
I was thinking about getting a heart rate chest strap, but I don't really need it. I just like numbers.
Still, even applying that formula, the OP should be well within her safe limits at 150 BPM.
It is nice to see I am not going to get a heart attack, thanks0 -
michelle7673 wrote: »OP, I just sent you a friend request but I think the system is bouncing it...
You're very focused on the scale number, and very motivated. Let me throw you a couple of ideas.
You can probably lose at a pretty good clip even doing it more sanely. But as a nurse just told me, "subcutaneous fat doesn't really weigh that much"....it's actually pretty fluffy. Losing that fast means a lot of muscle and guess what your heart's made of? So it takes a lot more weight loss to equal a really visible loss, even if the number is dropping faster. Plus, neither the ex or anyone else sees the number between your feet on the scale. They see you.
You're spending a lot of time at the gym. You could spend half of that 90 minutes a few days a week working a progressive strength training system hard. The first few weeks your scale weight will likely be slower to move, but that is just water retention in the muscles (which doesn't look at all bad). Adding a day or two a week of intensive interval training is likely to jumpstart you better than anything from GNC (although I am a big fan of vitamin B-12 having been deficient for a while). Again, lots of help here (MFP) on this.
Hello, I accepted your request. Nice to meet you
I am very happy using the elliptical at the moment. But I plan on trying other things at the gym after I lose 15 kg. Then I'll focus on strengthening my body.0 -
newyorkcitymom wrote: »Read The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf. Keep up the therapy. Do exercise in a way you enjoy and that makes you feel good and gives you time to clear your head. Try to think about yourself and what you need and want - and what besides being thin and having your boyfriend back would give you real pleasure. Think about what you love about yourself and what you want to accomplish. Get clear on your non-weight loss goals and you will find that you have a much healthier, more sustainable and effective approach to weight loss. Your boyfriend did a number on you and has impacted your self-esteem and it sounds like your social environment's not so great either. You need to get help and support to develop a much more reasonable sense of yourself and your goals.
I have other goals too, like getting high grades in my classes (I am a senior Psychology student) and writing short stories. I really enjoy writing and try to write few paragraphs every night.0 -
michelle7673 wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »I have nothing to add other than please don't take your boyfriend back! Show him what he can't have anymore, and let him live in his shallow selfish little world.
This.
Seriously, there is such a better way to do this. There are people here who can help you learn how to be healthy and strong, and support you, and when you figure out how beautiful you are (inside and out and even more so because you fought this out the right way) -- then you can tell him to go to hell. Believe me I have been at "oh I just want him back" -- and I would have sworn I would never get over it -- but then you know what? I did. And I looked back and said "What the hell was wrong with me for even wanting him?" There is no revenge anywhere near as good as living well.
But I don't want "revenge".... I simply love him and care about him so much and his happiness. I know he has commitment issues, and I know he secretly values me too, he is just too afraid to admit his feelings. Right now I am reading books on attachment issues, and I will try to make him open to me.0 -
christinev297 wrote: »I have nothing to add other than please don't take your boyfriend back! Show him what he can't have anymore, and let him live in his shallow selfish little world.
But I love him I am so peaceful around him, and I will show him it is okay to love me, that he can find peace with me too.0 -
VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »Wait, so your heart rate was hitting 150 when exercising? Why is that bad? In hard sprints, I'll hit much higher than that. My steady state cardio pace is about 170-180 (according to the machines, which I don't fully trust).
If you're hitting 150 while resting, that is bad.
Either way, if you want the effect, just take caffeine. That is ALL you are getting from it. I mean, coffee is a natural source of caffeine, for that matter.
I am not really informed on it, but my friend said it was too much for a heart rate, so I thought it was. But I believe I have a weak heart, so it is a bir uncomfortable during workouts.
In that case, you might want to check with a physician. In all likelihood, you are just experiencing normal discomfort. Cardio helps strengthen your heart, and it's not easy at first.
I don't care why your boyfriend dumped you. If he was denigrating you after choosing to date you, then you don't need that. He's a *kitten* at best, and probably a controlling dick. I've been through a tough time recently (relationship wise), and I am better off now. The key is not to blame yourself for another person's failings, even though it's tempting. I can tell you about it if you like, but it doesn't directly correlate.
Seriously, you don't need to put up with that kind of *kitten*. Sorry, guys with no sense of respect, or honor piss me off. Debasing your loved ones is the worst.
I believe he just has attachment issues and I will help him solve his problems.0 -
WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »michelle7673 wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »I have nothing to add other than please don't take your boyfriend back! Show him what he can't have anymore, and let him live in his shallow selfish little world.
This.
Seriously, there is such a better way to do this. There are people here who can help you learn how to be healthy and strong, and support you, and when you figure out how beautiful you are (inside and out and even more so because you fought this out the right way) -- then you can tell him to go to hell. Believe me I have been at "oh I just want him back" -- and I would have sworn I would never get over it -- but then you know what? I did. And I looked back and said "What the hell was wrong with me for even wanting him?" There is no revenge anywhere near as good as living well.
But I don't want "revenge".... I simply love him and care about him so much and his happiness. I know he has commitment issues, and I know he secretly values me too, he is just too afraid to admit his feelings. Right now I am reading books on attachment issues, and I will try to make him open to me.
NO!
This is going to sound brutal but frankly I do not care because you need to hear it.
HE DOES NOT LOVE YOU. HE DOES NOT VALUE YOU. THERE IS NO "SECRET VALUE", HE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOU.
He is NOT "too afraid to admit his feelings", he simply does not respect you. He does NOT NOT NOT NOT love you!
This is NOT because of you! It is because HE is a worthless sack of rubbish that you are better off without!
Do this for you! Please do not waste your time on a vile creature like your ex. You are a beautiful, wonderful person and you do not need him!0 -
WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »Wait, so your heart rate was hitting 150 when exercising? Why is that bad? In hard sprints, I'll hit much higher than that. My steady state cardio pace is about 170-180 (according to the machines, which I don't fully trust).
If you're hitting 150 while resting, that is bad.
Either way, if you want the effect, just take caffeine. That is ALL you are getting from it. I mean, coffee is a natural source of caffeine, for that matter.
I am not really informed on it, but my friend said it was too much for a heart rate, so I thought it was. But I believe I have a weak heart, so it is a bir uncomfortable during workouts.
In that case, you might want to check with a physician. In all likelihood, you are just experiencing normal discomfort. Cardio helps strengthen your heart, and it's not easy at first.
I don't care why your boyfriend dumped you. If he was denigrating you after choosing to date you, then you don't need that. He's a *kitten* at best, and probably a controlling dick. I've been through a tough time recently (relationship wise), and I am better off now. The key is not to blame yourself for another person's failings, even though it's tempting. I can tell you about it if you like, but it doesn't directly correlate.
Seriously, you don't need to put up with that kind of *kitten*. Sorry, guys with no sense of respect, or honor piss me off. Debasing your loved ones is the worst.
I believe he just has attachment issues and I will help him solve his problems.
"If I remember rightly, in such matters all advice is useless."
But I'll try anyway. You're majoring in psychology? Great. Get your degrees (don't stop until you have that PhD). Then use your degree to help all the people with attachment issues that you can. But don't date them.0 -
WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »Wait, so your heart rate was hitting 150 when exercising? Why is that bad? In hard sprints, I'll hit much higher than that. My steady state cardio pace is about 170-180 (according to the machines, which I don't fully trust).
If you're hitting 150 while resting, that is bad.
Either way, if you want the effect, just take caffeine. That is ALL you are getting from it. I mean, coffee is a natural source of caffeine, for that matter.
I am not really informed on it, but my friend said it was too much for a heart rate, so I thought it was. But I believe I have a weak heart, so it is a bir uncomfortable during workouts.
In that case, you might want to check with a physician. In all likelihood, you are just experiencing normal discomfort. Cardio helps strengthen your heart, and it's not easy at first.
I don't care why your boyfriend dumped you. If he was denigrating you after choosing to date you, then you don't need that. He's a *kitten* at best, and probably a controlling dick. I've been through a tough time recently (relationship wise), and I am better off now. The key is not to blame yourself for another person's failings, even though it's tempting. I can tell you about it if you like, but it doesn't directly correlate.
Seriously, you don't need to put up with that kind of *kitten*. Sorry, guys with no sense of respect, or honor piss me off. Debasing your loved ones is the worst.
I believe he just has attachment issues and I will help him solve his problems.
"If I remember rightly, in such matters all advice is useless."
But I'll try anyway. You're majoring in psychology? Great. Get your degrees (don't stop until you have that PhD). Then use your degree to help all the people with attachment issues that you can. But don't date them.
A million times this. I spent my 20s trying to "rescue" girls who had some sort of issues by dating them. That's why I was almost 40 before I married a woman who wanted me, not one who needed me.0 -
WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »michelle7673 wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »I have nothing to add other than please don't take your boyfriend back! Show him what he can't have anymore, and let him live in his shallow selfish little world.
This.
Seriously, there is such a better way to do this. There are people here who can help you learn how to be healthy and strong, and support you, and when you figure out how beautiful you are (inside and out and even more so because you fought this out the right way) -- then you can tell him to go to hell. Believe me I have been at "oh I just want him back" -- and I would have sworn I would never get over it -- but then you know what? I did. And I looked back and said "What the hell was wrong with me for even wanting him?" There is no revenge anywhere near as good as living well.
But I don't want "revenge".... I simply love him and care about him so much and his happiness. I know he has commitment issues, and I know he secretly values me too, he is just too afraid to admit his feelings. Right now I am reading books on attachment issues, and I will try to make him open to me.0 -
DeguelloTex wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »michelle7673 wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »I have nothing to add other than please don't take your boyfriend back! Show him what he can't have anymore, and let him live in his shallow selfish little world.
This.
Seriously, there is such a better way to do this. There are people here who can help you learn how to be healthy and strong, and support you, and when you figure out how beautiful you are (inside and out and even more so because you fought this out the right way) -- then you can tell him to go to hell. Believe me I have been at "oh I just want him back" -- and I would have sworn I would never get over it -- but then you know what? I did. And I looked back and said "What the hell was wrong with me for even wanting him?" There is no revenge anywhere near as good as living well.
But I don't want "revenge".... I simply love him and care about him so much and his happiness. I know he has commitment issues, and I know he secretly values me too, he is just too afraid to admit his feelings. Right now I am reading books on attachment issues, and I will try to make him open to me.
This.
OP, you can't change anyone, they are who they are. And if nothing else, pick up the book He's Just Not That Into You. It's written by two writers from Sex in the City, it's hilarious, it's brutally honest, and it's a great read for everyone holding out hope that someone can be fixed.0 -
OP, when you are with someone who loves and values you, you won't have to try and convince everyone else of it. Please focus on you and stay far, far away from this guy. I don't know you, but I know you are worth more than that. I don't think it's so hard to be happy, but you have to stop sabotaging yourself by prioritizing some *kitten* over your own health and wellness.0
-
WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »WingardiumLeviosa91 wrote: »VykkDraygoVPR wrote: »Wait, so your heart rate was hitting 150 when exercising? Why is that bad? In hard sprints, I'll hit much higher than that. My steady state cardio pace is about 170-180 (according to the machines, which I don't fully trust).
If you're hitting 150 while resting, that is bad.
Either way, if you want the effect, just take caffeine. That is ALL you are getting from it. I mean, coffee is a natural source of caffeine, for that matter.
I am not really informed on it, but my friend said it was too much for a heart rate, so I thought it was. But I believe I have a weak heart, so it is a bir uncomfortable during workouts.
In that case, you might want to check with a physician. In all likelihood, you are just experiencing normal discomfort. Cardio helps strengthen your heart, and it's not easy at first.
I don't care why your boyfriend dumped you. If he was denigrating you after choosing to date you, then you don't need that. He's a *kitten* at best, and probably a controlling dick. I've been through a tough time recently (relationship wise), and I am better off now. The key is not to blame yourself for another person's failings, even though it's tempting. I can tell you about it if you like, but it doesn't directly correlate.
Seriously, you don't need to put up with that kind of *kitten*. Sorry, guys with no sense of respect, or honor piss me off. Debasing your loved ones is the worst.
I believe he just has attachment issues and I will help him solve his problems.
No. Love doesn't work that way. You can't fix people, and you especially can't gain his love and respect by devaluing yourself. I know this first hand. Trust me, if I thought my wife actually loved me, and could change, then I'd still take her back. She won't, and I have self-worth enough to not further debase myself to continue trying to salvage the relationship she threw away.
Bottom line is, if someone treats you poorly, you can't change them. They don't have the fundamental respect for you that is required for a healthy relationship. And continuing to chase after him will just further bolster his ego, and make him think even less of you.0
This discussion has been closed.
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