How to say no?

jmh_90
jmh_90 Posts: 17 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I have been good with my diet for the past months. I am trying to have a clean diet with whole food. But I noticed that every time I "cheat" it is because someone has offered me something to eat (a cookie, a piece of chocolate, chips, etc). The thing is that I have issues with saying "no". I feel bad refusing and of course who wouldn't disagree if someone gives you free food? How do you deal with that?
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Replies

  • sherbear702
    sherbear702 Posts: 650 Member
    People could give a s*** less about you saying no to food they offer you. Seriously. Don't worry about hurting their feelings.
    Just say no thanks, I'm good. You could even add maybe later, just to soften the blow.

    Practice makes perfect. No,nope,nah, no thanks, pass, next time...take your pick.
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
    Just say "no thank you" and move on. You are not obligated to explain.
  • Shanel0916
    Shanel0916 Posts: 586 Member
    Agree with the above.
  • Asher_Ethan
    Asher_Ethan Posts: 2,430 Member
    Don't feel bad for saying no. Also, There's really nothing wrong with having A PIECE of chocolate.
  • _runnerbean_
    _runnerbean_ Posts: 640 Member
    My work colleagues always have treats for breaks. I just say no every time they offer me something and now they know that I only eat my own food and they don't even bother to offer it. If they think I'm fussy/weird etc so what. It's my belly!
  • areallycoolstory
    areallycoolstory Posts: 1,680 Member
    edited January 2016
    It can be tough. I've struggled with this in the past year. It gets easier and more natural with time. I have done everything from say no, to accept a cookie and throw it away later. These day days I can usually just say a simple no thanks. Practice makes perfect:-) And you will feel great, and have more success, if you take care of yourself around this issue. Good luck:-)
  • motterotter
    motterotter Posts: 701 Member
    I accept and throw it away unless its something that someone made specially for me then i eat it
  • melonaulait
    melonaulait Posts: 769 Member
    There's no reason not to have "less clean" foods in your diet, unless you hate them and don't want to eat them again. Stuff like chips, chocolate, "junk food"...

    But if you feel like you couldn't stop at the one cookie being offered, you might be better off just saying no thanks.
  • amrelmesery
    amrelmesery Posts: 86 Member
    u will feel better about yourself after you eat it and cheat? then just say NO
  • MikaMojito
    MikaMojito Posts: 680 Member
    To me it depends WHAT is being offered to me. If my colleague offers me store-bought cookies, I'll say no because to my mind, the calories aren't worth it. Since most of my colleagues are in better shape than me, telling them I'm watching my calories usually leads to them not offering anything for a week or two ;-)

    However, if my best friend offers me one of his homemade cinnamon-nut rolls, I take it. Because they are amazing and I'd rather go over once in a while than deny myself this pleasure. As long as it's a once in a while thing, it's ok to say yes.
  • pegharper
    pegharper Posts: 2 Member
    You have to decide if you're more concerned about how they'll feel or how you'll feel when you answer.
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
    Do you want it? Then say "yes, please".
    Don't want it? Say "no, thank you".

    Practice makes perfevt :D
  • blues4miles
    blues4miles Posts: 1,481 Member
    I usually say "not right now" if it's someone who's feelings I don't want to hurt. The "maybe later" just never happens. This is only true of work snacks/temptations. I am not perfect at saying no all of the time to all of the things. So also, log the food and move on in those cases.
  • holothuroidea
    holothuroidea Posts: 772 Member
    edited January 2016
    This might be an unpopular opinion but I'm not comfortable refusing people's generosity either and I don't think that's a bad thing.

    I would just accept the treats, enjoy the smallest amount possible, and make sure to record the calories. :)

    ETA: Unless it's a family member or a close friend who knows what you're trying to accomplish, those people should be respecting your positive lifestyle decisions.
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    This might sound snarky and I do not mean for it to be that way... but (and here is the but)..

    Just say no! Stop worrying about what anyone thinks except you! This person can care less or does not know you have decided to have a certain goal in mind with food..
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    I say no a lot. A lot of things just are not worth the calories to me (or I'd rather save calories for something else that day). I have Invisalign though so the choice is pretty much made for me (can't eat with the things on my teeth and it would be even more awkward to take them off). But I learned that it's just fine to say no. People get over it. Heck I find myself saying no at times when I don't have the things on now. You just have to stand your ground.

    But if I know that I'm going to be in a situation where people might offer me food, and I have the calories for it, I'll go without my aligners on and will make room for them in my day.
  • desperatethursday
    desperatethursday Posts: 1 Member
    I have just politely turned down one of my boyfriend's mom's famous curries, I felt bad but sometimes you have to risk offending people to look after yourself. I usually feel bad (for the person) if I don't take the food offered but I feel worse if I do with the guilt and regret and the gain. Do what's best for you, people will get used to it.
  • star1407
    star1407 Posts: 588 Member
    You could always say oh no I've just eaten, make out like you're full. Or just be honest and say you're eating healthy and want to keep a note of what you're eating
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  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,626 Member
    no one offers me food.

    maybe because i always say no thanks ;)
  • redraidergirl2009
    redraidergirl2009 Posts: 2,560 Member
    Ask yourself if you'll be happy you ate that tomorrow. Usually that works for me.
  • amber68rose556
    amber68rose556 Posts: 20 Member
    I used to struggle with this - as soon as any one suggested take out or food in a restaurant i was there! Then i told myself "Only you put it in your mouth," And it's true - no one can force you to eat anything, unless they stand on you and force it down your throat!! So take responsibility and remember, "Only you put it in your mouth!" :)
  • holothuroidea
    holothuroidea Posts: 772 Member
    gia07 wrote: »
    This might sound snarky and I do not mean for it to be that way... but (and here is the but)..

    Just say no! Stop worrying about what anyone thinks except you! This person can care less or does not know you have decided to have a certain goal in mind with food..

    I don't know about the OP but for me, personally, I really don't care what people think of me but I DO care about how I make people feel and it makes people feel good and happy to be generous with their food.

    Food is often socially significant so, for me, that sort of social reciprocity is a part of eating healthfully even if the food itself isn't "healthy."
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,474 Member
    yep, just say it.
    No.
    No.
    No.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    holothuroidea wrote: »
    gia07 wrote: »
    This might sound snarky and I do not mean for it to be that way... but (and here is the but)..

    Just say no! Stop worrying about what anyone thinks except you! This person can care less or does not know you have decided to have a certain goal in mind with food..

    I don't know about the OP but for me, personally, I really don't care what people think of me but I DO care about how I make people feel and it makes people feel good and happy to be generous with their food.

    Food is often socially significant so, for me, that sort of social reciprocity is a part of eating healthfully even if the food itself isn't "healthy."

    Are you talking about all foods, or foods that were made for special occasions? I'm with @MikaMojito re certain foods just not being worth the calories:
    MikaMojito wrote: »
    To me it depends WHAT is being offered to me. If my colleague offers me store-bought cookies, I'll say no because to my mind, the calories aren't worth it...

    However, if my best friend offers me one of his homemade cinnamon-nut rolls, I take it. Because they are amazing and I'd rather go over once in a while than deny myself this pleasure. As long as it's a once in a while thing, it's ok to say yes.
  • orion_81
    orion_81 Posts: 9 Member
    You have to say no thank you I am watching what I eat these days. Nobody reacts to a no but some might make smirk comments about your reply. People should not make you feel bad for wanting to be healthy.
  • holothuroidea
    holothuroidea Posts: 772 Member
    edited January 2016
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    Are you talking about all foods, or foods that were made for special occasions? I'm with @MikaMojito re certain foods just not being worth the calories:
    MikaMojito wrote: »
    To me it depends WHAT is being offered to me. If my colleague offers me store-bought cookies, I'll say no because to my mind, the calories aren't worth it...

    However, if my best friend offers me one of his homemade cinnamon-nut rolls, I take it. Because they are amazing and I'd rather go over once in a while than deny myself this pleasure. As long as it's a once in a while thing, it's ok to say yes.

    I think it's more about the intent than the food. I'll give some real life examples of situations I would accept the food:
    -My 5 year old offers me a candy from her christmas stash because sharing is caring.
    -A co-worker brings in food to share for a special occasion.
    -A parent at a play date offers lunch or a snack.
    -A receptionist offers a piece of candy.
    -A non-immediate family member or friend cooks a meal for a special occasion (or as a treat) that contains food I would otherwise avoid.

    Examples of food I would say "no" to:
    -An immediate family member or close friend offers me food that they want but know I'm avoiding because they don't want to feel guilty about eating it alone.
    -A co-worker brings in left over food just to get rid of it.

    I also will not refuse to go to occasions where food will be served that I don't like or want to avoid. I eat mostly vegan for ethical reasons, but I still go to barbecues or to the steakhouse for a friend's birthday because it's their favorite place. I try to choose the best options available, but if there are no options that fit with my dietary goals I still go because participating in those things is more important to me than my diet.

    I learned this lesson the hard way from experiencing firsthand the social impact of being a strict vegan. I think when we start diets, no matter how motivated we are, it's dangerous to underestimate how much social interaction involves food and how important those social interactions are for our overall wellbeing and the wellbeing of the people we care about.
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
    Problem is that special occasions aren't very special anymore.
  • MamaMc3
    MamaMc3 Posts: 213 Member
    You could just say, "No thanks, I'm still so full from breakfast/lunch/etc." That usually cuts it off. If they offer to leave it for you to eat later, just follow-up with, "And I'm trying to make healthier eating choices." Then if they continue to push it, you punch them in the face. (Maybe not that last part, but it's totally ok to just say no!)
  • holothuroidea
    holothuroidea Posts: 772 Member
    kommodevaran wrote: »
    Problem is that special occasions aren't very special anymore.

    All social occasions are special. It is better to work them into your goals than pretend like they're not important.

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