My boyfriend is 12 years older than me. Do guys want kids quite soon after marriage?

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Replies

  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    newmeadow wrote: »
    You have "soaking," that is, you put your dick in her vagina but you don't move. Not even a single pump, rub, wiggle or jiggle. Nothing. You just lay there, soaking.

    Uh oh. How do you know this?

    And wouldn't there be more fulfilling ways of having sex without having sex? Ways that involve some, ah, friction?

    you thinking old school????
  • ElJefeChief
    ElJefeChief Posts: 650 Member
    My girlfriend is 12 years younger than me as well. Her maturity level matches mine (which may say a lot about me). However, I'm 42.
  • provencal73
    provencal73 Posts: 1,275 Member
    How are you even thinking of kids? I'm 31 and still don't want any.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    Hello, my boyfriend is 12 years older than me. There's a possibility that I will get married when I'm 20 or 22. Do older guys want kids only after couple years of marriage? I personally don't want kids until my late 20s or early 30s. I just feel like they're a huge responsibility and I won't have much time to have fun. Plus, I want to make the most out of my career before having kids. Thoughts?

    If your concern is having fun, you aren't ready for kids.

    Or marriage....wait...did I just say that?

    Actually, marriage is fun...in a different way fun...not in a, I'm young and want to just have fun kind of fun though.
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,626 Member
    at age 19 i married a guy 7 years my senior.



    19 years later im still trying to get rid of the *kitten* .....
  • Becoming_A_Butterfly
    Becoming_A_Butterfly Posts: 2,534 Member
    Hello, my boyfriend is 12 years older than me. There's a possibility that I will get married when I'm 20 or 22. Do older guys want kids only after couple years of marriage? I personally don't want kids until my late 20s or early 30s. I just feel like they're a huge responsibility and I won't have much time to have fun. Plus, I want to make the most out of my career before having kids. Thoughts?

    Why do you say "there's a possibility" you will get married when you are 20 or 22, when you are 18 now?
  • trinty425
    trinty425 Posts: 108 Member
    First off, if the idea of when you have children is a deal breaker...then you need to have serious discussions with your partner earlier on in the relationship....why waste time and trouble?

    Each person is different, same as every man is different. Again, you need to have a serious and open discussion with your boyfriend. (and if he doesn't work out....with any and every future boyfriend).

    Also, you are still WAY WAY young! Don't be in such a rush to get married, worry about kids, etc.!

    While I did have an unplanned child when I turned 19...then married the dad, and decided to have our 2nd child pretty early. I personally like the idea that I will still be "young" when my children are grown and on their own. And I can have way more fun because I will also be (almost am) really financially stable. So...fun when I was 18 was an okay crowded loud party at a friend of a friend's house where I almost always had some sort of regret. When my boys are grown...my fun will be going on a 2 week trip to Europe! Also, I had no clue as to college or career at 18...now...I totally have a focus of what I am good at and what I want to do.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    Hello, my boyfriend is 12 years older than me. There's a possibility that I will get married when I'm 20 or 22. Do older guys want kids only after couple years of marriage? I personally don't want kids until my late 20s or early 30s. I just feel like they're a huge responsibility and I won't have much time to have fun. Plus, I want to make the most out of my career before having kids. Thoughts?

    Why do you say "there's a possibility" you will get married when you are 20 or 22, when you are 18 now?

    because the possibilities are endless....
  • allaboutthecake
    allaboutthecake Posts: 1,535 Member
    My first thought was when you tell him you want to get married, he's going to run. My second thought was when you tell him you don't want kids right away, he will be skipping and doing the Happy Dance! What 30y/o BOY wouldn't WANT an 18y/o girl to NOT be knocked up!

    Oh and sweetie, please don't waste your time and heart on this Boy.
  • zerojunk
    zerojunk Posts: 70 Member
    I always wished I had started having kids before I hit 30, my army for world domination would be much further along if I started at 18. I suggest you begin now.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    Char231023 wrote: »
    Because Mormons are against pre-marital sex, many of the "good" Mormons make it to their twenties as virgins. Heaven help them, they're hell bent on staying a virigin. But...we all know sex feels really really good. Add to it that it's forbidden and now you have a group of hormonally-saturated, unfulfilled virginal, twenty-something-year-olds going off to college, namely Brigham Young University.

    See where this is going? How do you have sex without having sex?

    You have "soaking," that is, you put your dick in her vagina but you don't move. Not even a single pump, rub, wiggle or jiggle. Nothing. You just lay there, soaking.

    To answer this question I was going to say dry humping. But I guess your way can work too. There was rumor that a girl in my high school thought if you only did anal you would still be a virgin. I guess technically she was right?

    This is actually a more commonly held belief than you might think...
  • michaelafoor916
    michaelafoor916 Posts: 710 Member
    tpmage wrote: »
    I always wished I had started having kids before I hit 30, my army for world domination would be much further along if I started at 18. I suggest you begin now.

    this post wins. thread over
  • the_quadfather
    the_quadfather Posts: 49 Member
    You should probably talk to your boyfriend about this rather than a bunch of strangers.

    THIS
  • CollieFit
    CollieFit Posts: 1,683 Member
    His maturity level matches mine.

    Isn't that a little worrying...?

  • CollieFit
    CollieFit Posts: 1,683 Member
    thorsmom01 wrote: »
    I think I'll just back out now, OP. You have been dating this guy for a while without your parents knowing yet your just turned legal age of consent for someone that much older than you in most states so you know there was something wrong or you wouldn't have hid it for so long. So no, I'm just going to say good luck with that .

    Exactly. She says she has known him for 8 yrs ( she would've been 10? When she met him ) and that their maturity level matches one another. So yeah, I'm backing out slowly..

    When we met, we were more like acquaintances. I moved from Hawaii. We then started talking to each other last April. That's when our relationship actually started.

    10 year olds have acquaintances? When I was 10 I had playmates... Oh... hang on...
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    Well it's been fun, I'm going to go soak for a while
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    How are you even thinking of kids? I'm 31 and still don't want any.

    *tick tock*
  • JustMissTracy
    JustMissTracy Posts: 6,338 Member
    cwolfman13 wrote: »
    Hello, my boyfriend is 12 years older than me. There's a possibility that I will get married when I'm 20 or 22. Do older guys want kids only after couple years of marriage? I personally don't want kids until my late 20s or early 30s. I just feel like they're a huge responsibility and I won't have much time to have fun. Plus, I want to make the most out of my career before having kids. Thoughts?

    If your concern is having fun, you aren't ready for kids.

    Or marriage....wait...did I just say that?

    Actually, marriage is fun...in a different way fun...not in a, I'm young and want to just have fun kind of fun though.

    LOL..I know exactly what kind you're speaking of!
  • brower47
    brower47 Posts: 16,356 Member
    This made me think of something:

    ngg0zjj3ecws.jpg

    "Prick Up Your Ears" Family Guy episode
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    If he is 30 and you are 18 and you are considering marriage, then I would have to assume that you got involved before you were 18. If so, then I guess he is interested in children. They have a name for that and laws against it.
  • ElJefeChief
    ElJefeChief Posts: 650 Member
    edited March 2016
    TheRoadDog wrote: »
    If he is 30 and you are 18 and you are considering marriage, then I would have to assume that you got involved before you were 18. If so, then I guess he is interested in children. They have a name for that and laws against it.

    SAVAGE

  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    DrEnalg wrote: »
    TheRoadDog wrote: »
    If he is 30 and you are 18 and you are considering marriage, then I would have to assume that you got involved before you were 18. If so, then I guess he is interested in children. They have a name for that and laws against it.

    SAVAGE

    I'm just putting it out there if that is the case.
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