Craziest food pusher story?
Francl27
Posts: 26,371 Member
Ever had someone who would just NOT take no for an answer? My kids had a playdate a couple weeks ago after school and I just stayed there too to chat with the mom (she's actually nice and means well). She offered me some melon... I said no. Honestly I wasn't hungry anyway, plus I have teeth aligners that I have to take out to eat, and it's awkward to do it in public (it's actually been helpful to avoid samples etc when going out, lol).
But she wouldn't take no for an answer. She cut the melon, put some in a bowl, and put it in front of me. I don't even like melon enough to spend the calories on it 99% of the time, so it was very irritating. Then she started offering me chocolate (I love chocolate but I was really not hungry and didn't want chocolate at the time). I said no and she put the box in front of me. I didn't eat anything but it was VERY awkward.
Honestly I don't even want to go there again after that. I don't understand why people do that. Can't they just take no for an answer? How do you react when that happens? I've known her for 5 years now but never went to her place before I lost the weight either, so it's not like she knows that I would probably have said yes before. Needless to say, I have no desire to ever go there again.
The other story is my mom who got really mad at me once day because I didn't want to order cheesecake at the Cheesecake Factory.. because she wanted to have a bite of it. She's diabetic and didn't want to order a whole one, so she just got pissed at me instead (plus she's always eating bread, chocolate, potatoes and whatnot anyway). Good times. Plus I hate it when I order something and people take a bite of it...
But she wouldn't take no for an answer. She cut the melon, put some in a bowl, and put it in front of me. I don't even like melon enough to spend the calories on it 99% of the time, so it was very irritating. Then she started offering me chocolate (I love chocolate but I was really not hungry and didn't want chocolate at the time). I said no and she put the box in front of me. I didn't eat anything but it was VERY awkward.
Honestly I don't even want to go there again after that. I don't understand why people do that. Can't they just take no for an answer? How do you react when that happens? I've known her for 5 years now but never went to her place before I lost the weight either, so it's not like she knows that I would probably have said yes before. Needless to say, I have no desire to ever go there again.
The other story is my mom who got really mad at me once day because I didn't want to order cheesecake at the Cheesecake Factory.. because she wanted to have a bite of it. She's diabetic and didn't want to order a whole one, so she just got pissed at me instead (plus she's always eating bread, chocolate, potatoes and whatnot anyway). Good times. Plus I hate it when I order something and people take a bite of it...
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Replies
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I think some people are trying to be hospitible, they just don't realize they are being obnoxious.
I get annoyed when people eat food off my plate too. I realize in the long run it's not that big of a deal and I really don't want to be rude. But when you alow yourself 1300 calories a day you kind of want to eat all of them.1 -
My sister is a big food pusher. She even does it when the food is yucky, as in "Try this, it's disgusting." Explain to me why anyone would want to eat food after being told it is disgusting? LOL! I don't think she used to be this way, but I know her mother in law does the same thing, so maybe it has rubbed off...0
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My mother in law, who is German, is the exact same way. She will ask half a dozen times, I will say "no thank you" and she'll put it in front of me anyways. I think for some it's just the way they were brought up.0
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My mom is not quite that bad of a food pusher, but she will continually try and think of something to offer that's in the fridge. "Do you want a banana? I have some leftover XYZ. If you're hungry there's cereal". I got it mom, I got it. I don't know how I would have handled that situation, lots of introvert awkwardness, sputtering, and removal from the environment asap.
I was a bad diabetic so...yeah. I may have just ordered the cheesecake just to keep the peace, but then I argue with my dad so I gotta keep one of my parents happy.0 -
The next someone who dares take.my food I'm stabbing with my fork.1
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pootle1972 wrote: »The next someone who dares take.my food I'm stabbing with my fork.
Maybe if it was lima beans I'd let them go unscathed.1 -
pootle1972 wrote: »The next someone who dares take.my food I'm stabbing with my fork.
Maybe if it was lima beans I'd let them go unscathed.
True. .I'll give you that.
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I'm guilty of being a food and everything pusher lol. That's how we grew up, we share everything. I'll give you my last dollar if need be kind of people. I wouldn't take offense to it.0
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Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
I've never had people push food on me though.
If I did, and they were a big person, I would be rude, not gonna lie, and say "I don't want it cuz I don't want to look like you!" I know that's mean, but guess what, I bet they'd never do it again!
I've come close to saying that to my mother-in-law cuz she always says I'm "too skinny" Mind you she's like 5 ft and over 200 pounds, so yeah I guess I am too skinny...to someone like her!
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SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »My mother in law, who is German, is the exact same way. She will ask half a dozen times, I will say "no thank you" and she'll put it in front of me anyways. I think for some it's just the way they were brought up.
My mom does that too. My grandparents were from Germany so I have a suspicion where she got it from haha. But she doesn't get offended if you say "no" as many times as she offers. Unless she offers for you to take it home for another day.0 -
DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
We'll hold him down for you.0 -
DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
I've never had people push food on me though.
If I did, and they were a big person, I would be rude, not gonna lie, and say "I don't want it cuz I don't want to look like you!" I know that's mean, but guess what, I bet they'd never do it again!
I've come close to saying that to my mother-in-law cuz she always says I'm "too skinny" Mind you she's like 5 ft and over 200 pounds, so yeah I guess I am too skinny...to someone like her!
That is absolutely horrible, sorry but negative responses like that may make a person eat more. I just wouldn't be your friend anymore after that comment.0 -
DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
I've never had people push food on me though.
If I did, and they were a big person, I would be rude, not gonna lie, and say "I don't want it cuz I don't want to look like you!" I know that's mean, but guess what, I bet they'd never do it again!
I've come close to saying that to my mother-in-law cuz she always says I'm "too skinny" Mind you she's like 5 ft and over 200 pounds, so yeah I guess I am too skinny...to someone like her!
That is absolutely horrible, sorry but negative responses like that may make a person eat more. I just wouldn't be your friend anymore after that comment.
And that would be fine w/me.
Because the way I see it... If you're allowed to "Skinny Shame" me, I'm allowed to "Fat Shame" you... no double-standards where I come from!
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SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »My mother in law, who is German, is the exact same way. She will ask half a dozen times, I will say "no thank you" and she'll put it in front of me anyways. I think for some it's just the way they were brought up.
My German husband's grandmother was the same way. She was a terrible cook too and refused to take no for an answer about food. I think she may have used an entire tub of cream cheese and butter one day on pieces of klaben she insisted we eat. My MIL is not like that thankfully.0 -
CrabNebula wrote: »SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »My mother in law, who is German, is the exact same way. She will ask half a dozen times, I will say "no thank you" and she'll put it in front of me anyways. I think for some it's just the way they were brought up.
My German husband's grandmother was the same way. She was a terrible cook too and refused to take no for an answer about food. I think she may have used an entire tub of cream cheese and butter one day on pieces of klaben she insisted we eat. My MIL is not like that thankfully.
LOL same with my MIL. She cooks vegetables to death, even after she takes them out of the can
Thankfully I've been in the family long enough to let it all roll off my back. She means well
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DoreenaV1975 wrote: »DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
I've never had people push food on me though.
If I did, and they were a big person, I would be rude, not gonna lie, and say "I don't want it cuz I don't want to look like you!" I know that's mean, but guess what, I bet they'd never do it again!
I've come close to saying that to my mother-in-law cuz she always says I'm "too skinny" Mind you she's like 5 ft and over 200 pounds, so yeah I guess I am too skinny...to someone like her!
That is absolutely horrible, sorry but negative responses like that may make a person eat more. I just wouldn't be your friend anymore after that comment.
And that would be fine w/me.
Because the way I see it... If you're allowed to "Skinny Shame" me, I'm allowed to "Fat Shame" you... no double-standards where I come from!
Way to be the bigger person! jk0 -
DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
I've never had people push food on me though.
If I did, and they were a big person, I would be rude, not gonna lie, and say "I don't want it cuz I don't want to look like you!" I know that's mean, but guess what, I bet they'd never do it again!
I've come close to saying that to my mother-in-law cuz she always says I'm "too skinny" Mind you she's like 5 ft and over 200 pounds, so yeah I guess I am too skinny...to someone like her!
That is absolutely horrible, sorry but negative responses like that may make a person eat more. I just wouldn't be your friend anymore after that comment.
I don't think it's very nice either but honestly I could totally see myself being pissed off enough to WANT to say something like that. It's a battle of will with myself most days to resist temptations and I find it just as rude when someone KNOWS that you lost weight and are watching what you eat yet still insist on pushing food on you.0 -
DoreenaV1975 wrote: »DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
I've never had people push food on me though.
If I did, and they were a big person, I would be rude, not gonna lie, and say "I don't want it cuz I don't want to look like you!" I know that's mean, but guess what, I bet they'd never do it again!
I've come close to saying that to my mother-in-law cuz she always says I'm "too skinny" Mind you she's like 5 ft and over 200 pounds, so yeah I guess I am too skinny...to someone like her!
That is absolutely horrible, sorry but negative responses like that may make a person eat more. I just wouldn't be your friend anymore after that comment.
And that would be fine w/me.
Because the way I see it... If you're allowed to "Skinny Shame" me, I'm allowed to "Fat Shame" you... no double-standards where I come from!
Way to be the bigger person! jk
Being the "Bigger Person" is not why I'm here... it's too take care of "me" if you can't respect the decisions I make to take care of myself, then I don't respect you... again, it's a 2 way street.
I would never say that just to be mean, like just out of the blue, but if someone disrespects my choices than I feel I have every right to do the same... and if it comes out mean, oh well, don't be my friend... anybody who can't respect my way of life isn't someone I want as a friend anyway so it wont bother me in the slightest...
Mean or not, that's me...
(Hahahahahaha - "bigger person" - bigger person" just got the pun!)0 -
DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
I've never had people push food on me though.
If I did, and they were a big person, I would be rude, not gonna lie, and say "I don't want it cuz I don't want to look like you!" I know that's mean, but guess what, I bet they'd never do it again!
I've come close to saying that to my mother-in-law cuz she always says I'm "too skinny" Mind you she's like 5 ft and over 200 pounds, so yeah I guess I am too skinny...to someone like her!
That is absolutely horrible, sorry but negative responses like that may make a person eat more. I just wouldn't be your friend anymore after that comment.
I don't think it's very nice either but honestly I could totally see myself being pissed off enough to WANT to say something like that. It's a battle of will with myself most days to resist temptations and I find it just as rude when someone KNOWS that you lost weight and are watching what you eat yet still insist on pushing food on you.
No, you're correct...it's not nice, but by the time I get to that point, I'm not thinking of being "nice" anymore...0 -
DoreenaV1975 wrote: »DoreenaV1975 wrote: »Oops - Edited to add:
This is in response to @kgirlhart 's comment above:
That happened last night! I weighed my mint greek yogurt pop, logged it...ate a bit of it...put it back on the scale so I didn't have to dirty another plate while I grabbed something else and my husband picked it up and took a bit of it! I'm like "NOOO!! I already weighed that!" He laughed. And although I wasn't truly mad, there was a part of me that thought "you stole my only food"! LOL! Like, I can only eat so much so I want it all, dammit! That's not the first time that's happened either...
I've never had people push food on me though.
If I did, and they were a big person, I would be rude, not gonna lie, and say "I don't want it cuz I don't want to look like you!" I know that's mean, but guess what, I bet they'd never do it again!
I've come close to saying that to my mother-in-law cuz she always says I'm "too skinny" Mind you she's like 5 ft and over 200 pounds, so yeah I guess I am too skinny...to someone like her!
That is absolutely horrible, sorry but negative responses like that may make a person eat more. I just wouldn't be your friend anymore after that comment.
I don't think it's very nice either but honestly I could totally see myself being pissed off enough to WANT to say something like that. It's a battle of will with myself most days to resist temptations and I find it just as rude when someone KNOWS that you lost weight and are watching what you eat yet still insist on pushing food on you.
No, you're correct...it's not nice, but by the time I get to that point, I'm not thinking of being "nice" anymore...
And I also don't think it's "nice" when people insult me because I'm skinny...
Again, I don't believe in double standards!
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A lot of cultures equate food to showing love. In most cases, food-pushers aren't doing it to be mean.
My BIL yells at his mom after about the 4th time she offers him something, and I can see her face drop. It hurts her feelings and it breaks my heart to watch. I would much rather say "no thank you" 1,000 times than hurt someone's feelings who means well.
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Why say anything? If they serve you food after you've already said no, and you don't eat it, I'd say it's their problem. And I would venture to guess that after it happens once, they wouldn't do it again (normal people, not necessarily family
). 1 -
A few of my friends now offer me non-vegan snacks even though they know I went fully plant-based. I don't get pissed or anything, and they also know I've been dieting for quite a while and can't always fit treats in my calories. I believe it's just them being less aware of what's plant-based and what's not.0
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I hate food-pushers, actually I hate anyone who can't respect a polite "no". Seriously no means no. I start off polite but if you keep ignoring polite refusals they get less polite. My mother in law (very overweight and in denial about the calorie density of her meals) and father in law (diabetic, overweight and an apparent death wish) and absolutely awful. Pretty much if you are not currently eating in that house they are convinced you are starving yourself and it just doesn't stop. My husband and I've instituted a your parents your problem rule, so my husband gets a look from me to keep them in line. It's getting harder since from my mother in law I get such comments like "If you are obese what must I be," there's no good response to that and from my father in law comments about what I must think of his sugar/carb consumption, well I think he doesn't like having feet or kidneys or eyesight but there's no way to say that. So I just see them less, it's a shame because they are generally very nice people who I don't mind hanging out with but I'm not damaging my health for their feelings anymore.0
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SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »A lot of cultures equate food to showing love. In most cases, food-pushers aren't doing it to be mean.
My BIL yells at his mom after about the 4th time she offers him something, and I can see her face drop. It hurts her feelings and it breaks my heart to watch. I would much rather say "no thank you" 1,000 times than hurt someone's feelings who means well.
But it's not nice to put someone in a very uncomfortable and awkward position either.0 -
SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »A lot of cultures equate food to showing love. In most cases, food-pushers aren't doing it to be mean.
My BIL yells at his mom after about the 4th time she offers him something, and I can see her face drop. It hurts her feelings and it breaks my heart to watch. I would much rather say "no thank you" 1,000 times than hurt someone's feelings who means well.
But it's not nice to put someone in a very uncomfortable and awkward position either.
Agreed.
I suppose each situation would require a different response. In the case of my MIL, she's just a bit oblivious. It's annoying but I'd rather not have any tension between us so I've found a way to deal with her pushing that doesn't upset her right back.
If it's someone who's pushing just to be a *kitten* then I think stronger words are needed.0 -
It depends on how someone does it.
There's this lady in the office that offers me treats at least once a week...
(Sometimes a couple times a week).
Sometimes I take them, sometimes I don't...
But when I say "no" she respects it and walks away.
She doesn't badger me, or insult me about how skinny I am...
On the other hand there's this lady I work w/ who is constantly saying stuff about how skinny I am, but she won't say it to my face... calling me anorexic to people, making comments on how I must "never eat"... She is very overweight... and has even said on more than one occasion, "I don't care if I die early as long as I get to eat whatever I want"...
and she does, you can tell..
anyway
if she came into my office and started badgering me w/ food, oh h*ll yeah I'd make a nasty comment to her...
So for those of you who think I'm "mean" that's fine, but I'm really not, I just tell it like it is when the time comes...
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DoreenaV1975 wrote: »It depends on how someone does it.
There's this lady in the office that offers me treats at least once a week...
(Sometimes a couple times a week).
Sometimes I take them, sometimes I don't...
But when I say "no" she respects it and walks away.
She doesn't badger me, or insult me about how skinny I am...
On the other hand there's this lady I work w/ who is constantly saying stuff about how skinny I am, but she won't say it to my face... calling me anorexic to people, making comments on how I must "never eat"... She is very overweight... and has even said on more than one occasion, "I don't care if I die early as long as I get to eat whatever I want"...
and she does, you can tell..
anyway
if she came into my office and started badgering me w/ food, oh h*ll yeah I'd make a nasty comment to her...
So for those of you who think I'm "mean" that's fine, but I'm really not, I just tell it like it is when the time comes...
If you'd described that scenario in your previous post, I think you would have gotten a lot more understanding.
If some *kitten* is calling you anorexic and being a total cow, she deserves to be put in her place.1 -
SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »DoreenaV1975 wrote: »It depends on how someone does it.
There's this lady in the office that offers me treats at least once a week...
(Sometimes a couple times a week).
Sometimes I take them, sometimes I don't...
But when I say "no" she respects it and walks away.
She doesn't badger me, or insult me about how skinny I am...
On the other hand there's this lady I work w/ who is constantly saying stuff about how skinny I am, but she won't say it to my face... calling me anorexic to people, making comments on how I must "never eat"... She is very overweight... and has even said on more than one occasion, "I don't care if I die early as long as I get to eat whatever I want"...
and she does, you can tell..
anyway
if she came into my office and started badgering me w/ food, oh h*ll yeah I'd make a nasty comment to her...
So for those of you who think I'm "mean" that's fine, but I'm really not, I just tell it like it is when the time comes...
If you'd described that scenario in your previous post, I think you would have gotten a lot more understanding.
If some *kitten* is calling you anorexic and being a total cow, she deserves to be put in her place.
Yeah I realized that after, LOL... but oh well, too late... and in the end I'm still here for "me" so if people don't like me, and I get it... I understand, but I will survive... 0 -
I've been on both extremes (very thin, and now obese), I took "hey your getting too thin, or eat something" as a compliment, I much rather have someone say your getting too thin, then your getting too fat any day- in my personal opinion. Society wants you to be thin "thin is in", I would rather be looked at what looks good to our society, then what doesn't.0
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