Craziest food pusher story?

zyxst

FridayApril01st2016 wrote: »

zyxst wrote: »

FridayApril01st2016 wrote: »

Francl27 wrote: »

Ever had someone who would just NOT take no for an answer? My kids had a playdate a couple weeks ago after school and I just stayed there too to chat with the mom (she's actually nice and means well). She offered me some melon... I said no. Honestly I wasn't hungry anyway, plus I have teeth aligners that I have to take out to eat, and it's awkward to do it in public (it's actually been helpful to avoid samples etc when going out, lol).

But she wouldn't take no for an answer. She cut the melon, put some in a bowl, and put it in front of me. I don't even like melon enough to spend the calories on it 99% of the time, so it was very irritating. Then she started offering me chocolate (I love chocolate but I was really not hungry and didn't want chocolate at the time). I said no and she put the box in front of me. I didn't eat anything but it was VERY awkward.

Honestly I don't even want to go there again after that. I don't understand why people do that. Can't they just take no for an answer? How do you react when that happens? I've known her for 5 years now but never went to her place before I lost the weight either, so it's not like she knows that I would probably have said yes before. Needless to say, I have no desire to ever go there again.


The other story is my mom who got really mad at me once day because I didn't want to order cheesecake at the Cheesecake Factory.. because she wanted to have a bite of it. She's diabetic and didn't want to order a whole one, so she just got pissed at me instead (plus she's always eating bread, chocolate, potatoes and whatnot anyway). Good times. Plus I hate it when I order something and people take a bite of it...

@Francl27 if these situations don't happen often & if it's important enough to you, to interact with; your children's friend's mother (for your children's sake) & your Mother (for your family's sake). Could you possibly work around, what's known to happen; with them? I know that this isn't fair, to you but someone always has to be, the better person & you seem rational enough, to be; that person.

However I'd suggest trying to make it easy on yourself as well, like remove your teeth aligners in your vehicle; before you enter your children's friend's mother's home & casually begin a conversation about what foods/beverages, you'd gladly spend your calories for; as a hint to her to offer. Also go hungry enough, to have the calories to spare, with both your children's friend's mother & your mother.

Why should Francl27 be the "better person"? Why does she have to give in and eat what she doesn't want in order to pacify someone else? Why can't the other people be the "better person" and take no for an answer?

It seems to me, from her previous post; that she's avoiding confrontation because she made no mention, of putting them in their place; possibly to avoid drama/alienation. Therefore a better alternative (for her, not them), would be a "work around"; on her part.

So because she didn't say no strong enough for you, she has to eat what someone puts in front of her. No means no. Period.

DeficitDuchess

zyxst wrote: »

FridayApril01st2016 wrote: »

zyxst wrote: »

FridayApril01st2016 wrote: »

Francl27 wrote: »

Ever had someone who would just NOT take no for an answer? My kids had a playdate a couple weeks ago after school and I just stayed there too to chat with the mom (she's actually nice and means well). She offered me some melon... I said no. Honestly I wasn't hungry anyway, plus I have teeth aligners that I have to take out to eat, and it's awkward to do it in public (it's actually been helpful to avoid samples etc when going out, lol).

But she wouldn't take no for an answer. She cut the melon, put some in a bowl, and put it in front of me. I don't even like melon enough to spend the calories on it 99% of the time, so it was very irritating. Then she started offering me chocolate (I love chocolate but I was really not hungry and didn't want chocolate at the time). I said no and she put the box in front of me. I didn't eat anything but it was VERY awkward.

Honestly I don't even want to go there again after that. I don't understand why people do that. Can't they just take no for an answer? How do you react when that happens? I've known her for 5 years now but never went to her place before I lost the weight either, so it's not like she knows that I would probably have said yes before. Needless to say, I have no desire to ever go there again.


The other story is my mom who got really mad at me once day because I didn't want to order cheesecake at the Cheesecake Factory.. because she wanted to have a bite of it. She's diabetic and didn't want to order a whole one, so she just got pissed at me instead (plus she's always eating bread, chocolate, potatoes and whatnot anyway). Good times. Plus I hate it when I order something and people take a bite of it...

@Francl27 if these situations don't happen often & if it's important enough to you, to interact with; your children's friend's mother (for your children's sake) & your Mother (for your family's sake). Could you possibly work around, what's known to happen; with them? I know that this isn't fair, to you but someone always has to be, the better person & you seem rational enough, to be; that person.

However I'd suggest trying to make it easy on yourself as well, like remove your teeth aligners in your vehicle; before you enter your children's friend's mother's home & casually begin a conversation about what foods/beverages, you'd gladly spend your calories for; as a hint to her to offer. Also go hungry enough, to have the calories to spare, with both your children's friend's mother & your mother.

Why should Francl27 be the "better person"? Why does she have to give in and eat what she doesn't want in order to pacify someone else? Why can't the other people be the "better person" and take no for an answer?

It seems to me, from her previous post; that she's avoiding confrontation because she made no mention, of putting them in their place; possibly to avoid drama/alienation. Therefore a better alternative (for her, not them), would be a "work around"; on her part.

So because she didn't say no strong enough for you, she has to eat what someone puts in front of her. No means no. Period.

While she did refuse, she's obviously not comfortable doing so. She choose not to address them, about not continuing to offer her something, again possibly because she isn't comfortable doing so. So then what'd be comfortable, for her to do? Either avoid them but possibly, that might make her uncomfortable also because they might confront her, about her avoidance; of them & she seems to be avoiding potential drama/conflict or just make the situation easier for her to deal with, without potential confrontation & so that's why I suggested, what I did. Your response'd indicate, that we're discussing rape here. This situation isn't that serious, that some tolerance; isn't acceptable.

lmhbuss

Rituals surrounding food and hospitality have been at play in human culture...pretty much since there were humans. During most of that time, needing to gain weight was an issue, not needing to lose it. I guess our social rituals simply haven't caught up with our newfound easy access to calorie rich foods... Oh who am I kidding?!??! If this isn't the most first world level problem on the planet, I have no idea what else could possibly qualify. They offered me food...more than once...*gasp, clutch pearls.* Say no, just don't eat it, eat and move on with life...whatever.