Do you judge people on appearance?
kate141987
Posts: 513 Member
in Chit-Chat
I used to do this a lot probably most of the time not even realising I was doing it
But I now actively try not to do this, but I still do it now and again.
Is it ever ok?
But I now actively try not to do this, but I still do it now and again.
Is it ever ok?
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Replies
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We have judgement for a reason; used well, without being a kitten, it will serve you well.7
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Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
It's never okay to judge people based on appearance, scottish pants. You don't know what tribulations they are going through. Some people don't have the resources to display nice things. Good human beings act normal without any sense of superiority.kate141987 wrote: »I used to do this a lot probably most of the time not even realising I was doing it
But I now actively try not to do this, but I still do it now and again.
Is it ever ok?
Job interviews, dress codes, public safety etc laws, finding a suitable companion -- your judgement is always at work; it's not always negative, it can help you navigate. Not all judgement is superficial and ego-based.
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Yes, it's my job. But my behaviour doesn't change towards them.
"I give the janitor the same respect I give the CEO"9 -
Scottish pants lol
Yeah I suppose appearance is a pretty personal thing, some people care some people don't but it can cause worry cos a lot of people get judged on it0 -
Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
That is not what she asked. Say you went to the mall or drove by the Hibatchi buffet.... and you judge people on their appearance in public settings.Cindy4FunFit wrote: »Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
It's never okay to judge people based on appearance, scottish pants. You don't know what tribulations they are going through. Some people don't have the resources to display nice things. Good human beings act normal without any sense of superiority.kate141987 wrote: »I used to do this a lot probably most of the time not even realising I was doing it
But I now actively try not to do this, but I still do it now and again.
Is it ever ok?
Job interviews, dress codes, public safety etc laws, finding a suitable companion -- your judgement is always at work; it's not always negative, it can help you navigate. Not all judgement is superficial and ego-based.
Of course, you can't go to a job interview in a leather biker jacket
That was in response to you. "That it is never ok"
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I'm just meaning in general, but at job interviews the judgement is more intense so I suppose in those circumstances we all have to admit we are judged on appearance, age etc0
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kate141987 wrote: »I used to do this a lot probably most of the time not even realising I was doing it
But I now actively try not to do this, but I still do it now and again.
Is it ever ok?
There are plenty of instances where it is ok, normal, and sometimes part of your professional requirements. Don't beat yourself up unless your being a kitten. Then, change your ways. Your judgement is a gift and can help you make good decisions as well as help others given your observations of them. It's a brain tool. Your behavior and responsive actions and whether you bad mouth a person based on appearance is the foul part.
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Iv probably been a kitten in the past about it, but try my best not to do that anymore and see people as people not just the book cover but it can be difficult at times I'm still slightly conflicted over it.
I guess I have judged people based on looks as in another female who is much prettier than me, il automatically think she loves herself lol and form a negative opinion but I guess that's more a reflection on me than anything else.
But personality can sometimes be evident in someone's appearance, sometimes0 -
Louise1491 wrote: »Just try to remember that if you judge a book by its cover you might just miss out on a good story, and if the story isn't to your taste, shut the book and move on with your own journey and let them get on with theirs. I think everyone has their own *kitten* to deal with.
But I've been there, hating on othets through my own insecurities but it's not helpful, just creates more hate and this world needs no more of that.
I'm dyslexic so it's easier for me to judge the book by its cover than it is to read it.0 -
Louise1491 wrote: »Just try to remember that if you judge a book by its cover you might just miss out on a good story, and if the story isn't to your taste, shut the book and move on with your own journey and let them get on with theirs. I think everyone has their own *kitten* to deal with.
But I've been there, hating on othets through my own insecurities but it's not helpful, just creates more hate and this world needs no more of that.
So true 0 -
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Brilliant advert @Louise1491
This kinda thing has happened to me at festivals etc, when your in the portaloo (sorry know it's gross) lol and you spend ages talking with the person next door and when you see each other it's like a shock almost
Definitely something to be said for getting to know someone based on everything except looks1 -
Louise1491 wrote: »Everyone judges others on appearance at some point, It's normal human behaviour. As long as you are not judging them solely on appearance then I wouldn't worry about it.
^^This.
It's human nature, a survival tactic which is no longer as relevant to us but that we can't stop.2 -
Yeah I was reading something to do with this it said, judgement is natural but it's not final. You can chose to give someone a chance even if your first judgement was negative, makes sense0
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Definitely, I just judged everyone posting in here.2
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I met this girl she was like 25/26 and she had this horrible big scar down her face. A guy had slashed her during a fight and I could see how badly it affected her, she was struggling to get a job and had all but given up. I felt really bad for her and could see how much it had affected her life. Got me thinking how society looks upon things like that, it's sad really and makes me grateful I don't have any problems like that0
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I'll admit im judgmental on behavior and attitude and I'm also stereotypical but I don't judge someone based on their appearance it's deceiving if that makes sense
I 'kinda/sorta' do this too, well not the stereotyping. I judge plenty of people on MFP for excessive sh!tt they do and its NOT just the selfie thread. I refrain from calling folks out on it A LOT because I don't want to cause conflict or hurt peoples feelings so I "bite my tongue". I'm sure I'm judged too but as most posters have said, everyone judges for one thing or another.
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I think in some situations it may be acceptable.0
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I believe it is human nature on some level judge but I would not say that in a bad way. We are naturally attracted to certain types of bodies, eyes etc but as for deciding if someone is a good person based on their looks is pretty much BS.
I have found that women who put other women down are more often then not unhappy with how they personal look or feel about themselves. It is sad.
In the line of work I do I should fit into a very cookie cutter look of pure professionalism so when people see me in real life and see that I have a lot of tattoos and love my ball caps and they are just shocked I ask them "Where you happy with my service? Does this change how good I am at my job?" The answer is always no. My looks have nothing to do with my abilities1 -
If y choose not to trust your better judgment sooner or later you will regret it...2
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I think we all judge people based on appearance, sex, stature, etc. I think if you are mindful that you do and easily allow your assumptions to be disproven, then you are ahead of a lot of people.
I always try to check myself on this because I hate that people do the same to me. I hate that I can be treated incredibly differently based on my hair, makeup, clothes and whether or not I put on glasses.1 -
sunn_lighter wrote: »kate141987 wrote: »I used to do this a lot probably most of the time not even realising I was doing it
But I now actively try not to do this, but I still do it now and again.
Is it ever ok?
of course I do not seeing people and assessing them in some way is like asking people to walk around without eyes and brains
I'm not suggesting you should walk around and not assess people of course you should but what I'm talking about is how much gravity should you give to your opinion based on appearance, or first appearances. I know almost everyone does it0 -
I think we all judge people based on appearance, sex, stature, etc. I think if you are mindful that you do and easily allow your assumptions to be disproven, then you are ahead of a lot of people.
I always try to check myself on this because I hate that people do the same to me. I hate that I can be treated incredibly differently based on my hair, makeup, clothes and whether or not I put on glasses.
Iv definitely noticed this, I was always dying my hair blonde most of my life but when I switched to brunette I noticed a change in how people treated me lol
Then when I had to start wearing glasses I personally felt more intelligent lol but iv never got used to wearing them, I just can't get used to them, think I may start though when at my next job interview, give off the impression I'm smarter than I really am lol0 -
By definition, my heuristic brain has judged every person I have ever seen ever. What my rational, thinking brain chooses to do with that judgment is another story.2
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First impressions are judged on appearance often I'd say
Heck I knew this guy who appeared the perfect family man and then the next week went out and killed a guy. Or another who was playing with babies at a party and had just gotten out of jail for beating up a cab driver.
My point is it's not worth judging on appearance cause it's often not accurate.0 -
sunn_lighter wrote: »kate141987 wrote: »I think we all judge people based on appearance, sex, stature, etc. I think if you are mindful that you do and easily allow your assumptions to be disproven, then you are ahead of a lot of people.
I always try to check myself on this because I hate that people do the same to me. I hate that I can be treated incredibly differently based on my hair, makeup, clothes and whether or not I put on glasses.
Iv definitely noticed this, I was always dying my hair blonde most of my life but when I switched to brunette I noticed a change in how people treated me lol
Then when I had to start wearing glasses I personally felt more intelligent lol but iv never got used to wearing them, I just can't get used to them, think I may start though when at my next job interview, give off the impression I'm smarter than I really am lol
anyone on this site who's lost a lot of weight can tell you about the weird combination of sadness and confidence you feel when people treat you so much better after
Yeah it's weird
When I used to be a little depressed, OK a lot depressed and didn't care how I looked, or more to the point didn't have the capability to care people treated me a lot different to when I felt better and cared. I guess appearance can be part of your armoury in a lot of situations1
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