Dealing with others comments

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Replies

  • CindyFooWho
    CindyFooWho Posts: 179 Member
    I had a friend tell me that I look like I'm 12. I'm 47. I like to think she was going for a compliment and just got the number wrong, but I'm not sure.
  • ggeise14
    ggeise14 Posts: 387 Member
    I love the "just right" comment - think I will start using that one! Find your comfort zone and congrats on achieving it and try and let the rest go.
  • RachelElser
    RachelElser Posts: 1,049 Member
    If it's someone you care about say something like "I am well within my healthy range and my doctor agrees. There is nothing to be concerned about" then change the subject. For someone you don't know, or care for something along the lines of "Until you get a degree in nutrition, keep your opinion to yourself"
  • lmew91
    lmew91 Posts: 88 Member
    I think that we often encounter people who don't know how to properly express what they're thinking. I have received comments that I thought were a little rude, such as "You better not lose any more weight missy!" But, this came from my dear aunt who I love very much and who is not mean-spirited at all, and I don't think she intended it the way it came out. Then there are others who are just jealous and/or dealing with their own personal issues, and any inappropriate comments they make are not a true reflection of you. I do agree that even when a person knows that how they feel is what is important, it can still be challenging to shrug off these types of comments.
  • Cutemesoon
    Cutemesoon Posts: 2,646 Member
    ...instead of getting praise, I get heat about how thin I look. The fact is that I don't look thin, I just look thinner than I did. I think people say stuff like this partly because they wish they were thin too.
    SOOOO much truth here!!!
  • campfirequeen1
    campfirequeen1 Posts: 317 Member
    Unfortunately I don't have that problem...YET, but I know it's coming and all these answers have given me something to think about and how I will respond. But, let me say this, I went and looked at your photos and I don't think you look skinny or sick. You look MARVELOUS! BRAVO you!
  • hmltwin
    hmltwin Posts: 116 Member
    This is something I've just started getting. Interestingly, to me at least, it started after I'd switched to maintainance - not while I was still losing. Most of the people who've said it were honestly concerned. I just thanked them for noticing that I'd lost weight and said I was quite happy at my new size.
  • kgirlhart
    kgirlhart Posts: 5,188 Member
    I had a friend tell me that I look like I'm 12. I'm 47. I like to think she was going for a compliment and just got the number wrong, but I'm not sure.

    I was told by a neighbor not to lose anymore weight because I "looked better with your weight on. Some people just look better heavier". I usually ignore comments or try to take them in the spirit they were said in, but I admit that one hurt my feelings. I can take it as a compliment when my sister tells me I'm so skinny. I don't really like to be called skinny but I know she means it as a compliment. But I don't think my neighbor was complimenting me. I'm not sure I'd like to be told I look 12 either. Some people you just have to ignore.
  • wizzybeth
    wizzybeth Posts: 3,578 Member
    As someone else mentioned, I would just take the motivation of the speaker in mind. If it is someone behaving rudely, I would just look them in the eye and say - pleasantly, but with confidence - "Uh, no, I am not..." - and continue looking them in the eye until they look away.

    If it is someone who is just dumb, I would roll my eyes and quickly change the subject. Either way you send the message that the discussion is not welcome.
  • vingogly
    vingogly Posts: 1,785 Member
    "I know my body, and I'm not". Or just ignore them. Depends on who they are and your relationship with them. People say stupid things sometimes without thinking about how the words might impact the receiver.
  • walkjem
    walkjem Posts: 47 Member
    A guy at the gym told me that I look great, but then said "Don't lose any more weight or you'll lose your boobs"! :/
  • DebSozo
    DebSozo Posts: 2,578 Member
    edited October 2016
    NM
  • jdhcm2006
    jdhcm2006 Posts: 2,254 Member
    walkjem wrote: »
    A guy at the gym told me that I look great, but then said "Don't lose any more weight or you'll lose your boobs"! :/

    You would be within your right to report him for that comment.
  • dopeysmelly
    dopeysmelly Posts: 1,390 Member
    I ignore all comments. Eventually people get used to The New You and stop commenting and life goes on.

    The funniest thing is when people who didn't know you before hear people commenting on The New You and how "different" you are. I don't know, for some reason I always find that amusing.
  • DebSozo
    DebSozo Posts: 2,578 Member
    I ignore all comments. Eventually people get used toThe New You and stop commenting and life goes on.

    The funniest thing is when people who didn't know you before hear people commenting on The New You and how "different" you are. I don't know, for some reason I always find that amusing.

    I like seeing "before & after" photographs. The differences are so stunning that the same person doesn't even look like he or she did in the before. It is mind boggling sometimes.
  • emawbey
    emawbey Posts: 49 Member
    walkjem wrote: »
    A guy at the gym told me that I look great, but then said "Don't lose any more weight or you'll lose your boobs"! :/

    Unbelievable, I can't believe how horrendous some humans are :'(
  • escschwartz
    escschwartz Posts: 18 Member
    Since I recently had a physical, I can honestly answer that "my doctor is thrilled" which usually shuts up most people. In fact I am right where the doctor told me me wanted me years ago. I usually preface it with "I'm not sick" since some friends worried that I had some medical issue that caused the loss and they are genuinely concerned for me.
  • ItsyBitsy246
    ItsyBitsy246 Posts: 307 Member
    elleelle03 wrote: »
    emawbey wrote: »
    138shades wrote: »
    I don't take anything to serious. I mean my own opinion is the only one I accept in all actuality.

    Ha I am trying to get more like this day by day, I care so much what others think but why is their opinion more valid than mine?

    One of the good things about growing old is you care less about what others think... see what you have to look forward to!

    Truth. Every decade that passes this becomes more and more evident. I'm 51, and at this point I give about zero f**ks. Liberating to say the least; wish I was of that mindset in my twenties.
  • Gracious_Plum
    Gracious_Plum Posts: 19 Member
    I often get told "Why do you bother with gym/eating healthy? You're already thin!"... my reply "exactly" B)
    It's going to the gym and eating well that keeps me like this! :|
  • Tabbycat00
    Tabbycat00 Posts: 146 Member
    When people comment on how others look, how they dress, or how much they weigh, it has more to do with them than it does with you. When you feel beautiful you can find beauty in everyone around you. If you and your doctor are happy with where you are than that's the important thing. If the comments really upset you maybe you could keep a journal to let some of those feelings out so they don't mount up.
  • lkpducky
    lkpducky Posts: 17,767 Member
    edited December 2016
    oops responded to old thread
  • trudie_b
    trudie_b Posts: 230 Member
    I posted a similar query (with my old MFP account) - the comments were really getting me down. What a few people said turned out to be true - wait it out, people will get used to your thinner size eventually and will stop commenting. I'm pleased to say, that's been the case for me. I rarely get comments now, and when I do, it bothers me less. I know I'm not too thin, I know I'm taking really good care of myself with my diet and my exercise, so the occasional comments slide off me nowadays.
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