Tell me your deepest, darkest secret.

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Replies

  • SoViLicious
    SoViLicious Posts: 2,633 Member
    I have a crush on someone on my FL.
  • HollisGrant
    HollisGrant Posts: 2,022 Member
    In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max’s toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog…When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I went nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out…But the worst thing I ever done — I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa — and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life

    I'm laughing so hard I'm almost crying.
  • SpeSHul_SnoflEHk
    SpeSHul_SnoflEHk Posts: 6,256 Member
    Am I the only one that fantasies about killing hookers??

    I don't try.

    I do.

    There is no try.

    What do you do with the body when you're done? Thats the only part Im having a problem with

    I can help you with that!
  • SpeSHul_SnoflEHk
    SpeSHul_SnoflEHk Posts: 6,256 Member
    I have a crush on someone on my FL.

    I know. It's obvious the way you flirt with me.
  • LilRedRooster
    LilRedRooster Posts: 1,421 Member
    I drink right from the juice carton in the refrigerator. And put it back. And no one ever knows..
  • brillmer
    brillmer Posts: 1,268 Member
    This sounds like a terrible idea lol
  • SpeSHul_SnoflEHk
    SpeSHul_SnoflEHk Posts: 6,256 Member
    I'm frequently depressed and often think about topping myself, which I can't do because too many people depend on me.


    Serious?
  • SpeSHul_SnoflEHk
    SpeSHul_SnoflEHk Posts: 6,256 Member
    Before I answer, is MFP contracted by the NSA like facebook?
  • welly5
    welly5 Posts: 293 Member
    I have issues respecting toothbrush ownership. Sorry friends, boyfriend, siblings.. all toothbrushes are in danger of being used by me if they are nearby and my teeth need brushing.
  • xvxCelticWandererxvx
    xvxCelticWandererxvx Posts: 2,890 Member
    don't worry, it's just me reading this thread. you can trust me.

    ... and go!


    Hmmm.....

    39875-Emma-Stone-no-no-no-no-no-gif-bGod.gif
  • grumpadon
    grumpadon Posts: 24
    In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max’s toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog…When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I went nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out…But the worst thing I ever done — I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa — and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life
    you are awesome. why can't my kids do more fun stuff like that.:laugh:
  • StinkyWinkies
    StinkyWinkies Posts: 603 Member
    well...I have two. one isn't really a "secret" since it happened in front about 300 people...but it was acutely embarrassing.

    the other is, well, I am a misanthrope, seriously, but I hide it behind a wonderfully, sweet, kind, smiling, gentle facade.
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    Before I answer, is MFP contracted by the NSA like facebook?

    oh yes. they have a massive file on you already. that horse has left the barn.
  • Cutting4life
    Cutting4life Posts: 505 Member
    I'm frequently depressed and often think about topping myself, which I can't do because too many people depend on me.

    sorry to hear bro, we're all gonna make it!
  • Parmcat
    Parmcat Posts: 268 Member
    I like to leave little....gifts in hotel room when I leave!
  • GiGiBeans
    GiGiBeans Posts: 1,062 Member
    Am I the only one that fantasies about killing hookers??

    I don't try.

    I do.

    There is no try.

    What do you do with the body when you're done? Thats the only part Im having a problem with

    Have you never seen the movie Frankenhooker?
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    At a very unhealthy level, I hate failure in myself, which in turn causes me to fail. I am trying to break that cycle that I have lived for too many years.
  • happywithme12
    happywithme12 Posts: 477 Member
    I secretly want to wrap myself in bacon and put lady gaga's meat dress to shame. SHAMEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!


    if you wear a bacon dress i may have to lock you in the closet to, cause i looooooooooovvvvvvvvvvvee bacon

    everyone does say I need to stop hanging out in closets lol ;)
    [/quote


    Stop your getting me all excited
  • AlwaysActive78
    AlwaysActive78 Posts: 29
    GOONIES!
  • JenAndSome
    JenAndSome Posts: 1,893 Member
    In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max’s toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog…When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I went nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out…But the worst thing I ever done — I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa — and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life
    <3 Goonies
  • rebbylicious
    rebbylicious Posts: 621 Member
    Just when I thought I said all I could say , My chick on the side said she got one on the way. Man I'm thrown and I dont know what to do, I guess I gotta give part 2 of my confessions. If I'm gonna tell it then I gotta tell it all, Damn near cried when I got that phone call, I'm so throwed and I don't know what to do, But to give you part 2 of my confessions.
  • tehboxingkitteh
    tehboxingkitteh Posts: 1,574 Member
    I have issues respecting toothbrush ownership. Sorry friends, boyfriend, siblings.. all toothbrushes are in danger of being used by me if they are nearby and my teeth need brushing.
    You. You must've had a meeting of the minds with my half pint.

    I've slept with more men than years old I am.
  • britttttx3
    britttttx3 Posts: 458
    Yes, you've guessed it.....i'm really a werewolf.
  • ltgarrow
    ltgarrow Posts: 342 Member
    I must confess.

    That my lonliness.

    Is killing me now.

    Don't you know I still believe.

    That you will be here.

    Just give me a sign.

    Don't worry, because when I find you, I am going to hit you...More than one time.

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