Am I ready to lose weight again?
Replies
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MichelleLei1 wrote: »I don't really have anything to add that hasn't been said. But just know that I still think you're amazing (as with many of us on here). It's tough, I feel like I'm in the same boat. I too have gained like 15 pounds in the last year due to stress and major life changes... but that's how life goes. Life will sort itself out, along with your weight. You're still a badass Steph.
lol everyone knows it's me. Love ya guys. Glad to know I'm not alone and that you don't think I'm psycho.
You? Psycho? Psssh!
You're cool.
And...pssst.. I too, had and stil have those same thoughts regarding meal times, how satieted a food will make me and for how long. I still have around 45lbs to go.
Let's kick some butt!
( would use the usual a word, but I don't feel like kicking kittens.
) 0 -
Alatariel75 wrote: »I think you're awesome.
Losing weight when life is kicking your kitten is a double edged sword, I find. Some days, the counting and logging and tracking is yet another burden and stressor, other days it feels good to have at least that one thing I can control.
So I've tried to cultivate the latter feeling a lot more. Rather than letting it add to my stress, I try to use logging and counting as a way of exercising at least a little bit of control over my circumstances, y'know? like "I can't control that and that, but at least I have a handle on this". I also try and remember that not logging and tracking for me often doesn't represent the removal of a stressor - I actually end up stressed because I feel like I'm failing and/or backsliding.
I'm not saying it works all the time, but sometimes is better than no times
I get this. And I feel the same way every time I think "Okay, I gotta get back at this the right way. I'm going to be in CONTROL and it will be great". But then Friday rolls around and I want to date or I force myself not to be isolated and do something social, and I have 3 glasses of wine and come home and eat the house.1 -
cerise_noir wrote: »MichelleLei1 wrote: »I don't really have anything to add that hasn't been said. But just know that I still think you're amazing (as with many of us on here). It's tough, I feel like I'm in the same boat. I too have gained like 15 pounds in the last year due to stress and major life changes... but that's how life goes. Life will sort itself out, along with your weight. You're still a badass Steph.
lol everyone knows it's me. Love ya guys. Glad to know I'm not alone and that you don't think I'm psycho.
You? Psycho? Psssh!
You're cool.
And...pssst.. I too, had and stil have those same thoughts regarding meal times, how satieted a food will make me and for how long. I still have around 45lbs to go.
Let's kick some butt!
( would use the usual a word, but I don't feel like kicking kittens. )
No kitten kicking. Right-o lol.0 -
cerise_noir wrote: »MichelleLei1 wrote: »I don't really have anything to add that hasn't been said. But just know that I still think you're amazing (as with many of us on here). It's tough, I feel like I'm in the same boat. I too have gained like 15 pounds in the last year due to stress and major life changes... but that's how life goes. Life will sort itself out, along with your weight. You're still a badass Steph.
lol everyone knows it's me. Love ya guys. Glad to know I'm not alone and that you don't think I'm psycho.
You? Psycho? Psssh!
You're cool.
And...pssst.. I too, had and stil have those same thoughts regarding meal times, how satieted a food will make me and for how long. I still have around 45lbs to go.
Let's kick some butt!
( would use the usual a word, but I don't feel like kicking kittens. )
Same. And I've noticed then when I get dragged that way, it pulls me further off course. I do my own version of CBT/self talk and try to catch myself in this kind of thing by trying to pull myself back to basics and the beginning. I never had all the food hang ups when I first started eating at deficit because it was all learned behavior when panic mode set in over being hungry. Why am I so damned afraid of being hungry that I've got all this crap set up around food is what I end up asking myself over and over ... and starting over from scratch with meal planning.
It works... until I get stupid again. Because sometimes it takes me a while to learn a lesson. After all it took me 40 years to learn to diet in the first place. I'll give myself a break on this.
Get what I'm saying here, Steph?0 -
GottaBurnEmAll wrote: »cerise_noir wrote: »MichelleLei1 wrote: »I don't really have anything to add that hasn't been said. But just know that I still think you're amazing (as with many of us on here). It's tough, I feel like I'm in the same boat. I too have gained like 15 pounds in the last year due to stress and major life changes... but that's how life goes. Life will sort itself out, along with your weight. You're still a badass Steph.
lol everyone knows it's me. Love ya guys. Glad to know I'm not alone and that you don't think I'm psycho.
You? Psycho? Psssh!
You're cool.
And...pssst.. I too, had and stil have those same thoughts regarding meal times, how satieted a food will make me and for how long. I still have around 45lbs to go.
Let's kick some butt!
( would use the usual a word, but I don't feel like kicking kittens. )
Same. And I've noticed then when I get dragged that way, it pulls me further off course. I do my own version of CBT/self talk and try to catch myself in this kind of thing by trying to pull myself back to basics and the beginning. I never had all the food hang ups when I first started eating at deficit because it was all learned behavior when panic mode set in over being hungry. Why am I so damned afraid of being hungry that I've got all this crap set up around food is what I end up asking myself over and over ... and starting over from scratch with meal planning.
It works... until I get stupid again. Because sometimes it takes me a while to learn a lesson. After all it took me 40 years to learn to diet in the first place. I'll give myself a break on this.
Get what I'm saying here, Steph?
Yes...I get a lot of things. That's how I know I'm not completely nuts. I just need to figure out why I FEEL so bad, when I know I'm not a horrible/fat/lazy person.
I don't understand which CBT book to buy? Help?0 -
GottaBurnEmAll wrote: »cerise_noir wrote: »MichelleLei1 wrote: »I don't really have anything to add that hasn't been said. But just know that I still think you're amazing (as with many of us on here). It's tough, I feel like I'm in the same boat. I too have gained like 15 pounds in the last year due to stress and major life changes... but that's how life goes. Life will sort itself out, along with your weight. You're still a badass Steph.
lol everyone knows it's me. Love ya guys. Glad to know I'm not alone and that you don't think I'm psycho.
You? Psycho? Psssh!
You're cool.
And...pssst.. I too, had and stil have those same thoughts regarding meal times, how satieted a food will make me and for how long. I still have around 45lbs to go.
Let's kick some butt!
( would use the usual a word, but I don't feel like kicking kittens. )
Same. And I've noticed then when I get dragged that way, it pulls me further off course. I do my own version of CBT/self talk and try to catch myself in this kind of thing by trying to pull myself back to basics and the beginning. I never had all the food hang ups when I first started eating at deficit because it was all learned behavior when panic mode set in over being hungry. Why am I so damned afraid of being hungry that I've got all this crap set up around food is what I end up asking myself over and over ... and starting over from scratch with meal planning.
It works... until I get stupid again. Because sometimes it takes me a while to learn a lesson. After all it took me 40 years to learn to diet in the first place. I'll give myself a break on this.
Get what I'm saying here, Steph?
Yes...I get a lot of things. That's how I know I'm not completely nuts. I just need to figure out why I FEEL so bad, when I know I'm not a horrible/fat/lazy person.
I don't understand which CBT book to buy? Help?
Well, if you need a diet specific one, go with The Beck Diet Solution. If you need CBT for more than diet and life in general, try CBT for Dummies.0 -
GottaBurnEmAll wrote: »GottaBurnEmAll wrote: »cerise_noir wrote: »MichelleLei1 wrote: »I don't really have anything to add that hasn't been said. But just know that I still think you're amazing (as with many of us on here). It's tough, I feel like I'm in the same boat. I too have gained like 15 pounds in the last year due to stress and major life changes... but that's how life goes. Life will sort itself out, along with your weight. You're still a badass Steph.
lol everyone knows it's me. Love ya guys. Glad to know I'm not alone and that you don't think I'm psycho.
You? Psycho? Psssh!
You're cool.
And...pssst.. I too, had and stil have those same thoughts regarding meal times, how satieted a food will make me and for how long. I still have around 45lbs to go.
Let's kick some butt!
( would use the usual a word, but I don't feel like kicking kittens. )
Same. And I've noticed then when I get dragged that way, it pulls me further off course. I do my own version of CBT/self talk and try to catch myself in this kind of thing by trying to pull myself back to basics and the beginning. I never had all the food hang ups when I first started eating at deficit because it was all learned behavior when panic mode set in over being hungry. Why am I so damned afraid of being hungry that I've got all this crap set up around food is what I end up asking myself over and over ... and starting over from scratch with meal planning.
It works... until I get stupid again. Because sometimes it takes me a while to learn a lesson. After all it took me 40 years to learn to diet in the first place. I'll give myself a break on this.
Get what I'm saying here, Steph?
Yes...I get a lot of things. That's how I know I'm not completely nuts. I just need to figure out why I FEEL so bad, when I know I'm not a horrible/fat/lazy person.
I don't understand which CBT book to buy? Help?
Well, if you need a diet specific one, go with The Beck Diet Solution. If you need CBT for more than diet and life in general, try CBT for Dummies.
Yeah I don't know. I need diet help in regards to my poor relationship to food but also need help for stress/anxiety/sadness. I'll think on it.0 -
MichelleLei1 wrote: »I don't really have anything to add that hasn't been said. But just know that I still think you're amazing (as with many of us on here). It's tough, I feel like I'm in the same boat. I too have gained like 15 pounds in the last year due to stress and major life changes... but that's how life goes. Life will sort itself out, along with your weight. You're still a badass Steph.
lol everyone knows it's me. Love ya guys. Glad to know I'm not alone and that you don't think I'm psycho.
I've come in late to this conversation with some extra hugs and encouragement. I've seen your journey on here, and I know you are going through a very hard time now. I am glad you are looking for a therapist, and being proactive in your journey. Such great advice given here. 0 -
Some hugs from me too. You're not alone.0
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I would say that it's time for you to address the REAL problems. When you overeat, it's easy for people to say just eat less... But you have to figure out yourself the reasons WHY you do this even when you know it goes against what you really want. Only then you will be able to gain real control. Otherwise I think that even if you do good a little while, you'll still have that cloud hanging over you're head, and there's no way you can ignore that.
Sometimes there are things that we don't have control over, and that might mean that you have to let go of the fears you are putting in your head. In stressful situations, just take it one day at a time, focus on the task at hand and take it as it goes. Over analyzing will just stress you and damage you mentally and physically... I know what I'm talking about since my husband had a heart attack a little more then a year ago. He lost his job and has been on disability for a while, and now this has run out and the other program he's supposed to be embarked on is taking a LONG time processing his request. Not only did we lose our house last year, almost lost our vehicles and my husband almost took his life at the worse of his depression last winter, now it's been months we are waiting on some money to come in and we will almost be 3 months late on rent because I can't afford to keep everything going on my own, so we are facing being homeless with 2 children under 2 years old. Basically, we have learned to live despise all of those things and one thing we have learned is to deal with things as they come, hope for the best and remember that whatever is thrown at you you will find a way. Otherwise, you make yourself sick and might even jeopardize the relationships that matter most to you. You are not yourself when you are stressed.
I totally agree with who ever said that you should keep on training no matter what, this will keep you in shape and help manage your stress levels.
I hope this helps. Good luck with whatever it is that is happening to you... I hope it all gets better very soon. oxoxo0 -
Posting because I need to get a few things off of my chest, and also looking for some insight on a few things as far as weight loss is concerned.
I understand CICO. I train hard, grasp the concept of needing to use a food scale, understand TDEE, NEAT, macros, and yadda yadda yadda...
I've lost my weight. I bulked and sucked at cutting, gained some back and then some.
Here I am, thinking I know what to do, never understanding how people gain weight back but I weigh 20 more lbs than I did last year at this time (yes, I did gain 14 purposefully during the bulk). But still.
Probably since July I have been dealing with the highest amount of stress I have ever had in my adult life. I've never spent so much time crying. It got bad enough to miss a few months of my period, and now I feel my body responding in different ways. For example, my psoas is SO tight. I can't use the restroom most of the week and wonder if this is why and if the tight psoas is related to stress. I wonder if this is slowing down the scale as well. I just feel like my whole body is constantly strained.
I've also developed a disordered way of thinking about food and eating. And that adds to the stress and pain I'm feeling now. I am searching for a therapist.
On top of that I feel fat, which makes the stress of beginning to date again at 31 in NYC even worse.
So I need to stop shoving animal crackers in my face at work, right? I need to reduce stress and hopefully let go of some water weight.
I guess I want the world to tell me "it's okay, stress is the reason you're not losing weight", but I know better...and that makes me sad all over again.
Anyway, I finally went to get some blood work done and will hear back next week about thyroid and cortisol. I'm probably looking for excuses.
Has anyone been able to be successful at losing weight while their life is messy? Or have you had to put it on the back burner for awhile?
This summer was hell and yes, I made a conscious decision to step away from maintenance. I just couldn't deal with it, on top of everything else that was going on. Fast forward a few months and yep, I gained around 10lbs. But, I'm now (thankfully) past that period and back on track and back to the lower weight. The big thing is to not let a break turn into years. Get through what you need to get through and then get back at it ~hugs~1 -
On the issue of digging into WHY...
Sometimes, you don't have to. I had therapy (with a real therapist) who basically practiced a form of what I learned was CBT, and he told me flat out that I didn't really need to understand the nitty gritty of what was behind all my issues, I just needed to engage in behaviors to fix them. In the act of fixing them, I'd make the why irrelevant, because the why was in the past. It was the past that was causing my problems, btw.
He was right.
Now, in our lovely bbells' case, some of the why's may be important. But not all of them have to be. It's daunting to think you have to uncover a lot of stuff before you can even think to make progress sometimes. Sometimes, you just blindly have to take a baby step on the belief that you're going to make some progress towards a goal and going to help yourself.5 -
As far as the cortisol and stomach issues go, I'm just CURIOUS. I mean, I literally can't poop for 5 days at a time. It clearly shows on the scale and makes things a little confusing.
Try powdered vitamin c to bowel tolerance. I haven't had a problem with constipation since I started taking this in the AM.
Disclosure - tastes AWFUL. I'm anemic and take it in warm water with a teaspoon of blackstrap molasses, which makes it somewhat more palatable. Or just chug it. But start with the recommended dose and work up as needed, or else beware
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kshama2001 wrote: »I have no idea what psoas is.
But honestly, losing weight and what you put in your mouth is something you can control.
https://www.yoganatomy.com/psoas-resources/
@bbell1985 because you do know about the psoas muscle, I wonder if you practice yoga and have kept up your practice during this time? What's your exercise routine in general?
Exercise has been a lifesaver for me to deal with stress, rather than my former coping mechanism, food. If I'm stressed I can't just jump onto my yoga mat - I'll do some mindless cardio before I am ready for a mindful practice.
Spending time in nature is especially good for destressing. Since you're in NYC it's more challenging for you than it is for me, but not impossible.
However, being in NYC you have more access to mind-body resources. I had a fantastic yoga therapist for a while who was just amazing. Unfortunately, she moved away.
I've just completed moving in with my OH and unpacking, which has been quite stressful. I've been trying to eat at maintenance, but have been going over, and have gained three pounds since August. I'm ok with that though, and am ready to get back on track.
{{{{{ hugs }}}}}
I don't practice yoga. I have considered adding it to my routine but with working 6:30 am to 5 pm and my weight training already taking up 9 hours per week...I don't know if I feel like adding it honestly.
Still, my psoas hates me right now. I should really go get a massage because there's only so much I can do with a tennis ball.kshama2001 wrote: »I have no idea what psoas is.
But honestly, losing weight and what you put in your mouth is something you can control.
https://www.yoganatomy.com/psoas-resources/
@bbell1985 because you do know about the psoas muscle, I wonder if you practice yoga and have kept up your practice during this time? What's your exercise routine in general?
Exercise has been a lifesaver for me to deal with stress, rather than my former coping mechanism, food. If I'm stressed I can't just jump onto my yoga mat - I'll do some mindless cardio before I am ready for a mindful practice.
Spending time in nature is especially good for destressing. Since you're in NYC it's more challenging for you than it is for me, but not impossible.
However, being in NYC you have more access to mind-body resources. I had a fantastic yoga therapist for a while who was just amazing. Unfortunately, she moved away.
I've just completed moving in with my OH and unpacking, which has been quite stressful. I've been trying to eat at maintenance, but have been going over, and have gained three pounds since August. I'm ok with that though, and am ready to get back on track.
{{{{{ hugs }}}}}
I don't practice yoga. I have considered adding it to my routine but with working 6:30 am to 5 pm and my weight training already taking up 9 hours per week...I don't know if I feel like adding it honestly.
Still, my psoas hates me right now. I should really go get a massage because there's only so much I can do with a tennis ball.
My employer offers "relaxing noon time yoga" as a free benefit. I tried it and ended up injuring myself, lol. However, I founded physical therapy extremely relaxing and refreshing so I suppose the yoga helped indirectly.
OMG. Sorry
Your employer offers noontime yoga?!?! And here I am eating my lunch in 5 minutes standing up. Can I come work with you?
I got into yoga in the 90s when I worked at a small liberal arts college with great benefits, including lunch time activities like yoga or aerobics.0 -
ronjsteele1 wrote: »Hi bbell. The short answer to your question is yes. Since Jan 1 of this year I have lost weight while be under a horrendous amount of stress. There are some specific things I did that have allowed that to happen.
First, I made an active decision that this year I had to focus on my health. Inspite of having kids, homeschooling, taking care of property, my marriage, etc., I HAD to take care of myself. I also knew that having almost a hundred pounds to lose was the result of some severe emotional trauma. On top of that, I had someone close to me verbalizing their disgust with my weight. I also had a long history of an eating disorder as a teen. While I have long since dealt with that, their are some mental aspects of that that are hard to get rid of (I never have. I just tend to ignore them knowing they are not healthy).
With all of that and more, I started by just logging my meals. Once I got decent at doing that I actually tried to stay at ANY amount of deficit I could. Some days that was 100 cals and some days it was more. I made my goal not so much to lose a certain number of pounds, but to just keep losing or maintaining and not gain. While I worked on the food part (I already knew how to eat healthy. Portion control was my thing) I knew I had to learn to no longer be an emotional eater. Literally hundreds of hours of counsel and journaling later most of the emotional issues have been dealt with and I'm way more aware of eating intentionally for fuel not comfort. I also have been working my way through the book the beck diet solution which is a guide on using cognitive behavioral therapy to learn to not overeat. I have had my share of ups and downs and honestly, for the first six months I lost very little. Maybe a couple of pounds. But I didn't gain either. Sometimes I would get discouraged when I'd come here and someone would have lost 50#'s in the same amount of time I lost 5. I would remind myself that success for me this year is being honest with myself and dealing with the emotional garbage, learning to ignore any unhealthy thoughts about food, exercising for stress relief not weight loss, and ending my year healthier then I started it. When I looked at my personal goals I realized that I was succeeding. Did I lose a ton this year? No. By the end of December I will have lost about 20#'s or just over that. That comes out to less then half a pound a week. But it's less then I started the year at. I'm in such a different place then 11 months ago and am going into 2017 more able to go at the weight loss at a faster pace (read 1-1.5#'s a week).
My suggestion to you is to focus on getting your emotional house in order. Seek to maintain or lose at a very slow rate. Log your days honestly and without condemnation of yourself (this can be hard). Consider the book on cognitive behavioral therapy. Forget about dating right now. You have bigger fish to fry.
There is a great thread on here that is sayings that helped people on their journey. I'm on my phone and can't search for the link for you right now. I printed those off and kept them in our bathroom. I would use a dry erase marker and write a new one each week on the top of my bathroom mirror. I read them daily. The one that helped me probably the most is something about the time is going to pass no matter what. I can be in the same place or a better place next year. It helped me choose to work towards being in a better place.
Emotional stuff is HARD work. But in the end, dealing with it will ultimately make your weight loss so much easier.
If you made it through this book then you are a super hero.
Thank you for this detailed response! I'm happy you are doing better. You're right...I have some emotional crap to deal with.
I've considered the CBT book but really feel like I need to hash things out in person with someone. I'm still looking for a therapist.
And you're right. I've deleted my dating profiles. I'm focusing on rest and my (school) work on the weekend. I'm also going to stop drinking for a little bit.
Now that you're not dating or drinking you have time for yoga (or other activities specific to stress reduction) 1 -
GottaBurnEmAll wrote: »GottaBurnEmAll wrote: »cerise_noir wrote: »MichelleLei1 wrote: »I don't really have anything to add that hasn't been said. But just know that I still think you're amazing (as with many of us on here). It's tough, I feel like I'm in the same boat. I too have gained like 15 pounds in the last year due to stress and major life changes... but that's how life goes. Life will sort itself out, along with your weight. You're still a badass Steph.
lol everyone knows it's me. Love ya guys. Glad to know I'm not alone and that you don't think I'm psycho.
You? Psycho? Psssh!
You're cool.
And...pssst.. I too, had and stil have those same thoughts regarding meal times, how satieted a food will make me and for how long. I still have around 45lbs to go.
Let's kick some butt!
( would use the usual a word, but I don't feel like kicking kittens. )
Same. And I've noticed then when I get dragged that way, it pulls me further off course. I do my own version of CBT/self talk and try to catch myself in this kind of thing by trying to pull myself back to basics and the beginning. I never had all the food hang ups when I first started eating at deficit because it was all learned behavior when panic mode set in over being hungry. Why am I so damned afraid of being hungry that I've got all this crap set up around food is what I end up asking myself over and over ... and starting over from scratch with meal planning.
It works... until I get stupid again. Because sometimes it takes me a while to learn a lesson. After all it took me 40 years to learn to diet in the first place. I'll give myself a break on this.
Get what I'm saying here, Steph?
Yes...I get a lot of things. That's how I know I'm not completely nuts. I just need to figure out why I FEEL so bad, when I know I'm not a horrible/fat/lazy person.
I don't understand which CBT book to buy? Help?
Well, if you need a diet specific one, go with The Beck Diet Solution. If you need CBT for more than diet and life in general, try CBT for Dummies.Yeah I don't know. I need diet help in regards to my poor relationship to food but also need help for stress/anxiety/sadness. I'll think on it.
Decades ago, I used CBT techniques to stop self-medicating with alcohol and find they work with food as well. I listened to the first few chapters of The Beck Diet Solution as an audio book and it was in line with my previous experience. I stopped when we got to the active exercises part, as I was really just checking the book out because I'd heard about it here. I would have done the exercises back when I was struggling with alcohol but feel like the principles have since been internalized.
It was available in my library system so perhaps yours as well.
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kshama2001 wrote: »As far as the cortisol and stomach issues go, I'm just CURIOUS. I mean, I literally can't poop for 5 days at a time. It clearly shows on the scale and makes things a little confusing.
Try powdered vitamin c to bowel tolerance. I haven't had a problem with constipation since I started taking this in the AM.
Disclosure - tastes AWFUL. I'm anemic and take it in warm water with a teaspoon of blackstrap molasses, which makes it somewhat more palatable. Or just chug it. But start with the recommended dose and work up as needed, or else beware
If Vit. C doesn't work for you (and oh yes it's awful! My boy use to have to take it in applesauce ) then try magnesium oxide. Usually a couple of capsules a day will work for most people. Might take a few days to take affect so give it at least a good 7 day try. If two doesn't work after a couple of days you can up to 3 caps, etc. They generally run about 500mg a capsule. If you find a dose that works, make sure you take it daily after that and cut back if you hit bowel tolerance. 0 -
ronjsteele1 wrote: »kshama2001 wrote: »As far as the cortisol and stomach issues go, I'm just CURIOUS. I mean, I literally can't poop for 5 days at a time. It clearly shows on the scale and makes things a little confusing.
Try powdered vitamin c to bowel tolerance. I haven't had a problem with constipation since I started taking this in the AM.
Disclosure - tastes AWFUL. I'm anemic and take it in warm water with a teaspoon of blackstrap molasses, which makes it somewhat more palatable. Or just chug it. But start with the recommended dose and work up as needed, or else beware
If Vit. C doesn't work for you (and oh yes it's awful! My boy use to have to take it in applesauce ) then try magnesium oxide. Usually a couple of capsules a day will work for most people. Might take a few days to take affect so give it at least a good 7 day try. If two doesn't work after a couple of days you can up to 3 caps, etc. They generally run about 500mg a capsule. If you find a dose that works, make sure you take it daily after that and cut back if you hit bowel tolerance.
lol. I take magnesium. I drank a bottle of the liquid stuff and it didn't do anything.0 -
kshama2001 wrote: »As far as the cortisol and stomach issues go, I'm just CURIOUS. I mean, I literally can't poop for 5 days at a time. It clearly shows on the scale and makes things a little confusing.
Try powdered vitamin c to bowel tolerance. I haven't had a problem with constipation since I started taking this in the AM.
Disclosure - tastes AWFUL. I'm anemic and take it in warm water with a teaspoon of blackstrap molasses, which makes it somewhat more palatable. Or just chug it. But start with the recommended dose and work up as needed, or else beware
whoa. I'm so intrigued. But do I just get it at the drugstore?0 -
I read your post yesterday and all I could think of was how close it sounds to where I am right now. The last year and a half have been pretty stressful. I haven't weighed myself since March. I probably quit logging around then too, other than sporadic days where I decide to start back up and then eat way too much. And I'm almost back into my old clothes. I have Beck's Diet Solution after seeing @GottaBurnEmAll recommend it a few times, so now I just need to find the courage to read it and start anew.
We can do this!0 -
Cutting calories when you're already stressed could be a bad idea. It's basically another form of stress on your body, as is exercise. I find there's only so much stress in the different forms that I can take at any one time and one effects the other whether you're talking about mental or physical stress on your body. As I think some others have suggested (I haven't read the thread), I would focus on prioritising stress relief which could take many forms (such as exercise, meditation, yoga, therapy or just making sure you are taking time for yourself). Also make sure you're prioritising getting enough good quality sleep as this will impact on so many areas of your life.
Perhaps in terms of food you would benefit from taking the focus off of weight loss and just making sure you're getting good nutrition with a variety of whole foods to support a healthy mind and body.1 -
I read your post yesterday and all I could think of was how close it sounds to where I am right now. The last year and a half have been pretty stressful. I haven't weighed myself since March. I probably quit logging around then too, other than sporadic days where I decide to start back up and then eat way too much. And I'm almost back into my old clothes. I have Beck's Diet Solution after seeing @GottaBurnEmAll recommend it a few times, so now I just need to find the courage to read it and start anew.
We can do this!
You've got this @malibu927
I felt the same as you...but I am so glad that I opened that book. Seriously. I didn't think a book would help, but it did. I hadn't realised that I was being horrible to myself and punishing myself.
And yep, @GottaBurnEmAll recommended the book to me as well.
@bbell1985 we're here for you!!! I wish you all the best.
And TMI...i have the bathroom issues too when I am super stressed. Once a week if I am lucky. I find abdominal massage and a heat pad to help a little.0 -
GottaBurnEmAll wrote: »GottaBurnEmAll wrote: »cerise_noir wrote: »MichelleLei1 wrote: »I don't really have anything to add that hasn't been said. But just know that I still think you're amazing (as with many of us on here). It's tough, I feel like I'm in the same boat. I too have gained like 15 pounds in the last year due to stress and major life changes... but that's how life goes. Life will sort itself out, along with your weight. You're still a badass Steph.
lol everyone knows it's me. Love ya guys. Glad to know I'm not alone and that you don't think I'm psycho.
You? Psycho? Psssh!
You're cool.
And...pssst.. I too, had and stil have those same thoughts regarding meal times, how satieted a food will make me and for how long. I still have around 45lbs to go.
Let's kick some butt!
( would use the usual a word, but I don't feel like kicking kittens. )
Same. And I've noticed then when I get dragged that way, it pulls me further off course. I do my own version of CBT/self talk and try to catch myself in this kind of thing by trying to pull myself back to basics and the beginning. I never had all the food hang ups when I first started eating at deficit because it was all learned behavior when panic mode set in over being hungry. Why am I so damned afraid of being hungry that I've got all this crap set up around food is what I end up asking myself over and over ... and starting over from scratch with meal planning.
It works... until I get stupid again. Because sometimes it takes me a while to learn a lesson. After all it took me 40 years to learn to diet in the first place. I'll give myself a break on this.
Get what I'm saying here, Steph?
Yes...I get a lot of things. That's how I know I'm not completely nuts. I just need to figure out why I FEEL so bad, when I know I'm not a horrible/fat/lazy person.
I don't understand which CBT book to buy? Help?
Well, if you need a diet specific one, go with The Beck Diet Solution. If you need CBT for more than diet and life in general, try CBT for Dummies.
Yeah I don't know. I need diet help in regards to my poor relationship to food but also need help for stress/anxiety/sadness. I'll think on it.
CBT can be applied to ANYTHING...in my job, I've used it with substance abusing behaviors (both drugs & alcohol-I used to teach treatment professionals CBT use & ran some groups) and I know people who use it to treat self injurious behaviors and batterer intervention/anger management. It can be used for smoking, eating disorders or even weight loss, as discussed here.0 -
cerise_noir wrote: »I read your post yesterday and all I could think of was how close it sounds to where I am right now. The last year and a half have been pretty stressful. I haven't weighed myself since March. I probably quit logging around then too, other than sporadic days where I decide to start back up and then eat way too much. And I'm almost back into my old clothes. I have Beck's Diet Solution after seeing @GottaBurnEmAll recommend it a few times, so now I just need to find the courage to read it and start anew.
We can do this!
You've got this @malibu927
I felt the same as you...but I am so glad that I opened that book. Seriously. I didn't think a book would help, but it did. I hadn't realised that I was being horrible to myself and punishing myself.
And yep, @GottaBurnEmAll recommended the book to me as well.
@bbell1985 we're here for you!!! I wish you all the best.
And TMI...i have the bathroom issues too when I am super stressed. Once a week if I am lucky. I find abdomianl massage and heat to help a little.
:flowerforyou:0 -
ronjsteele1 wrote: »kshama2001 wrote: »As far as the cortisol and stomach issues go, I'm just CURIOUS. I mean, I literally can't poop for 5 days at a time. It clearly shows on the scale and makes things a little confusing.
Try powdered vitamin c to bowel tolerance. I haven't had a problem with constipation since I started taking this in the AM.
Disclosure - tastes AWFUL. I'm anemic and take it in warm water with a teaspoon of blackstrap molasses, which makes it somewhat more palatable. Or just chug it. But start with the recommended dose and work up as needed, or else beware
If Vit. C doesn't work for you (and oh yes it's awful! My boy use to have to take it in applesauce ) then try magnesium oxide. Usually a couple of capsules a day will work for most people. Might take a few days to take affect so give it at least a good 7 day try. If two doesn't work after a couple of days you can up to 3 caps, etc. They generally run about 500mg a capsule. If you find a dose that works, make sure you take it daily after that and cut back if you hit bowel tolerance.
lol. I take magnesium. I drank a bottle of the liquid stuff and it didn't do anything.
If you're talking about magnisium citrate, it is different than what ronjsteele1 was talking about. MC is popularly referred to as Four Flavors of Satan (for good reason, google it...there is a site called Poop Report which frequently mentions it...funny & horrible at the same time) but you have to drink a LOT of water for it to work properly. Probably true of oxide as well.
Hydration should help with that as well. And if magnusium of either type or probiotics or Vit C don't help, you might take a look at Miralax...it makes it soft.0 -
wow, I'm so sorry you're going through this & also for everyone else. I've been thru the ringer for years but the last 2 have been a lot more calm0
-
I think the main thing is that you realize that you developed a disordered relationship with food. And it was calorie counting that did that. It's no wonder you don't want to jump back in it.
Obsessive calorie counting is definitely a form of EDNOS. Does everyone on this site suffer from an eating disorder? Of course not. But thers are definitely a few. Obsessing over anything day in day out for years isn't good for anyone's head.
I think the therapist is the way to go. Once you find someone to help with your feelings then you can start thinking about how/why you want to lose weight.0 -
kshama2001 wrote: »As far as the cortisol and stomach issues go, I'm just CURIOUS. I mean, I literally can't poop for 5 days at a time. It clearly shows on the scale and makes things a little confusing.
Try powdered vitamin c to bowel tolerance. I haven't had a problem with constipation since I started taking this in the AM.
Disclosure - tastes AWFUL. I'm anemic and take it in warm water with a teaspoon of blackstrap molasses, which makes it somewhat more palatable. Or just chug it. But start with the recommended dose and work up as needed, or else beware
whoa. I'm so intrigued. But do I just get it at the drugstore?
I don't see it on the GNC website. I get all my supplements from iherb. This is the brand and form I've been using for years. http://www.iherb.com/p/474
Buffered C is marginally less nasty than straight C.0 -
I am so late to this but wanted to chime in with support.
Basically my life is one entire merry go round of stress and trying to deal with the crap my brain throws at me daily. I've also had a pretty crap year topped off by some particularly stressful events that threatened my income. To the point where currently unmedicated me trotted back to the doctor and in two weeks I will be back trying out the psych meds that I try to avoid for as long as possible.
So last year I did pretty well self managing my condition and hit my 1lb per week goal almost effortlessly. This year it has been a lot harder but for the most part I have continued to lose. Most recently, I have found setting my MFP goal to sedentary and just trying to end the day somewhere in the green has been a lot easier psychologically for whatever reason.
But whatever approach you take, remember to be kind to yourself. I'm a firm believer that no good comes from smacking yourself up side the head with negativity, the world shoves enough of that down our throats without us talking *kitten* to ourselves too.
And yoga can be brilliant but for me, I actually get much more stress relief from 20 brutal minutes of HIIT/Tabata style bodyweight stuff. And Youtube psoas releasing stretches, they work pretty great (I get sciatica and despite being a former gymnast/dancer am the laziest damn stretcher ever so my sciatica plays up far more often than it should!).0 -
Hey guys. I just had one hour to have awake at home before I start all over again tomorrow so apologies for not responding directly. Thanks again for all the support.
I've decided to raise my calories up, create a tiny deficit and stop calorie cycling because I think it was causing more stress. Not ready to give up the deficit.
Spent most of the day wildly stressed. Crying a lot. Tomorrow is a new day.1
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