Student brought me an iced mocha...

carissar7

I don't think that teachers are appreciated enough, especially ones who teach high school. I was finishing a test after class one day when I was in HS and the teacher I had started crying to another teacher because the kids in my class were so mean to her and would throw stuff at her. She was also a new teacher at the time so I don't think she had the experience to deal with that. They were a real rowdy bunch of kids. I got up to hand her my test and gave her a hug lol.

MyChocolateDiet

Any suggestions on how to accept this gift without adding it to my food log? I'm not ready to come out of the dieting closet and I don't want to offend. I really appreciate the gesture. I love my job, but food surprises are a part of my problem. If there is a cookie laying out, I'm eating it.

Johnny/Joanie: How thoughtful of you! I really appreciate it. Unfortunately, I'm watching my sugar intake, and this is not the right kind of food for me right now, even though it's delicious. Should we put it in the fridge and save it for your Mom or your Dad?

ken_hogan

Any suggestions on how to accept this gift without adding it to my food log? I'm not ready to come out of the dieting closet and I don't want to offend. I really appreciate the gesture. I love my job, but food surprises are a part of my problem. If there is a cookie laying out, I'm eating it.

Johnny/Joanie: How thoughtful of you! I really appreciate it. Unfortunately, I'm watching my sugar intake, and this is not the right kind of food for me right now, even though it's delicious. Should we put it in the fridge and save it for your Mom or your Dad?

That's, like, so awful it's breathtaking. If you are incapable of receiving a kindness from a young person without breaking it, then there's something broken about you.

How is that awful? The person who was kind enough to get it for her doesn't know whether or not she is diabetic and the sugar could spike her insulin.

OP: If you're that worried about it accept it then toss it in the trash later on.

She isn't a diabetic so I'd rather not tangle over the hypothetical. And the person in question is a kid. It's common sense to me that you don't treat a student who gives a gift in this coarse way.

Agreed. She turns the drink down but has no problem grabbing a cookie she sees laying out. I also doubt she's diabetic.

toutmonpossible

FFS don't spill it into the garbage. I get so disturbed at those who suggested wasting food this way on here, even as a joke.

Be gracious, accept the gift as it is offered and only drink it if you can fit it into your plan.

Maybe "wasting" food is your primary concern - but for me, it's WAY more important to stay on plan and lose my weight. I don't clean my plate. And I don't eat extra food because it is "free".

Even free things have costs and putting extra, unnecessary food into a person trying to lose weight is "waste" too.

Unless the OP really wants the coffee - then drink it and exercise it off.

I agree. It's not good to waste food, but that food can't be Fed Ex-ed to starving children in the Third World. You have to start with yourself and if caring for yourself means eating reasonably and avoiding sugary, empty-calorie treats that will cause you to gain weight, that's where you start.

ken_hogan

FFS don't spill it into the garbage. I get so disturbed at those who suggested wasting food this way on here, even as a joke.

Be gracious, accept the gift as it is offered and only drink it if you can fit it into your plan.

Maybe "wasting" food is your primary concern - but for me, it's WAY more important to stay on plan and lose my weight. I don't clean my plate. And I don't eat extra food because it is "free".

Even free things have costs and putting extra, unnecessary food into a person trying to lose weight is "waste" too.

Unless the OP really wants the coffee - then drink it and exercise it off.

I agree. It's not good to waste food, but that food can't be Fed Ex-ed to starving children in the Third World. You have to start with yourself and if caring for yourself means eating reasonably and avoiding sugary, empty-calorie treats that will cause you to gain weight, that's where you start.

So, you are pretty much saying what I did. Changing current habits?

kimmymayhall

I wish the OP would return to address some of the posts/comments....

OP's profile says she is a teacher/tutor. I think it makes a difference if this is happening in a classroom setting or in her or the student's home and how old the kids are. I would approach this differently with a 7-year-old than a teenager.
Don't lie, don't waste food, don't stomp on a child's kindness, don't eat/drink something you don't want, and always say THANK YOU. Simple, right? I'd personally be thrilled if someone gifted me with iced coffee!

2aycocks

As a teacher myself, if you have a student that thinks enough of you to bring you a mocha, dont DARE hurt their feelings!! thank them graciously and maybe laughingly ask, 'is this "low cal"? I'm trying to get my school girl figure back! ha!'
That should drop the "hint". then just sip the mocha in front of the student, and pour the rest out when they are gone.

It's wonderful to have students care so much about you!!! I think they would probably try to help if they knew you were trying to lose weight. In fact, I'll bet you would receive some really good Healthy treats if they knew. Heck, tell them you NEED their help! Then you would probably get more help than you wanted!! ha!! :laugh:

_errata_

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smiley245

Any suggestions on how to accept this gift without adding it to my food log? I'm not ready to come out of the dieting closet and I don't want to offend. I really appreciate the gesture. I love my job, but food surprises are a part of my problem. If there is a cookie laying out, I'm eating it.

Johnny/Joanie: How thoughtful of you! I really appreciate it. Unfortunately, I'm watching my sugar intake, and this is not the right kind of food for me right now, even though it's delicious. Should we put it in the fridge and save it for your Mom or your Dad?

That's, like, so awful it's breathtaking. If you are incapable of receiving a kindness from a young person without breaking it, then there's something broken about you.

I agree! As an adult if I were Joanie I'd be pretty sad. As a kid Joanie I'd probably cry.

^ this.... The kid went out of his way to do something special , and you turn around and say this generous gift is wrong...As a child I would have been heart broken, especially if I really liked you as a teacher.
AND s/he must really like you as a teacher to bring you an Iced mocha!

Id log it and drink it or do the fake sipping and pass it on later.

I do like the one teachers advice to say thank you gracefully and suggest the best gift would be a smile/good behavior.

Leebett

Wow, Thank you for the positive, constructive responses. I can't believe how snarky some of you are! I have amazing students who I love dearly and would never want to squash their generosity. I work very hard to make them achieve their brightest potential, I would never intentionally break that trust.

I am not diabetic and I don't eat EVERY cookie lying around. I used that to try to show that I struggle with self-control (apparently some of us are very literal).

When I wrote my original post, I hadn't looked up the calories yet and thought there were a lot more than the actual. I'm still new to this and have been really working hard.

I accepted the drink with a thank you and a smile, drank a few sips while the student was present, drank about half total and threw the other half down the sink.

Again, thank you for your responses. Please remember when posting that this site is for people who are trying to better themselves. Rarely does negativity help anyone.

_errata_

Wow, Thank you for the positive, constructive responses. I can't believe how snarky some of you are! I have amazing students who I love dearly and would never want to squash their generosity. I work very hard to make them achieve their brightest potential, I would never intentionally break that trust.

I am not diabetic and I don't eat EVERY cookie lying around. I used that to try to show that I struggle with self-control (apparently some of us are very literal).

When I wrote my original post, I hadn't looked up the calories yet and thought there were a lot more than the actual. I'm still new to this and have been really working hard.

I accepted the drink with a thank you and a smile, drank a few sips while the student was present, drank about half total and threw the other half down the sink.

Again, thank you for your responses. Please remember when posting that this site is for people who are trying to better themselves. Rarely does negativity help anyone.

Seems pretty reasonable to me. For the record, I wasn't facepalming the OP.

I think what you went through is pretty common for everyone in a work environment. At some point in time we have to realize that these sorts of decisions have to be sustainable. For some, saying no is easy, and they can do that for the rest of their lives. Other people have a harder time doing that, so they have to do one of three things, or a combination of 1 and 2:

1) Adjust their diet for the rest of the day so they stay under their goal.
2) Hit the gym harder to burn off the calories.
3) Not care. Gain weight.

For me, my caloric goal is a bucket that gets filled every day. I would have totally drank the mocha (if I liked mochas), calculated the calories, and adjusted my diet for the rest of the day to be under my caloric goal. Sometimes I go over. Sometimes I don't know exactly how many calories I ate, but those are issues that we dieters just have to deal with.

The important thing is to just do something that works for you, will continue to work for you, and allows you stay under your calorie limit. I hope that helps.

MyChocolateDiet

Wow, Thank you for the positive, constructive responses. I can't believe how snarky some of you are! I have amazing students who I love dearly and would never want to squash their generosity. I work very hard to make them achieve their brightest potential, I would never intentionally break that trust.

I am not diabetic and I don't eat EVERY cookie lying around. I used that to try to show that I struggle with self-control (apparently some of us are very literal).

When I wrote my original post, I hadn't looked up the calories yet and thought there were a lot more than the actual. I'm still new to this and have been really working hard.

I accepted the drink with a thank you and a smile, drank a few sips while the student was present, drank about half total and threw the other half down the sink.

Again, thank you for your responses. Please remember when posting that this site is for people who are trying to better themselves. Rarely does negativity help anyone.

:flowerforyou:

I'm glad you are a nice lady and a teacher. I'm glad some of these other people with their weird ideas are not.

they make me feel like this.

and I'm glad you knew that was a bad way to make a little kid feel. So happy with the outcome.

smiley245

Wow, Thank you for the positive, constructive responses. I can't believe how snarky some of you are! I have amazing students who I love dearly and would never want to squash their generosity. I work very hard to make them achieve their brightest potential, I would never intentionally break that trust.

I am not diabetic and I don't eat EVERY cookie lying around. I used that to try to show that I struggle with self-control (apparently some of us are very literal).

When I wrote my original post, I hadn't looked up the calories yet and thought there were a lot more than the actual. I'm still new to this and have been really working hard.

I accepted the drink with a thank you and a smile, drank a few sips while the student was present, drank about half total and threw the other half down the sink.

Again, thank you for your responses. Please remember when posting that this site is for people who are trying to better themselves. Rarely does negativity help anyone.

This makes me smile. Im glad your the kind of teacher children want to bring gifts too.They make a difference.:flowerforyou:

toutmonpossible

Wow, Thank you for the positive, constructive responses. I can't believe how snarky some of you are! I have amazing students who I love dearly and would never want to squash their generosity. I work very hard to make them achieve their brightest potential, I would never intentionally break that trust.

I am not diabetic and I don't eat EVERY cookie lying around. I used that to try to show that I struggle with self-control (apparently some of us are very literal).

When I wrote my original post, I hadn't looked up the calories yet and thought there were a lot more than the actual. I'm still new to this and have been really working hard.

I accepted the drink with a thank you and a smile, drank a few sips while the student was present, drank about half total and threw the other half down the sink.

Again, thank you for your responses. Please remember when posting that this site is for people who are trying to better themselves. Rarely does negativity help anyone.

I don't if any of the above was directed at me, but I believe I was positive, constructive, realistic, and YOU were the one who came to the forum asking for help. You are also the one who said you couldn't resist sweets. That's not being overly literal, that's reading.

It's your profile that says you are concerned about your weight possibly causing serious problems in your personal life. A lot of people spent time trying to respond to you so your lecture is misplaced.

Achrya

I wish my students brought me something other than sticky fingers and snotty faces.

I'm glad you enjoyed your treat OP, and that you inspire such graciousness in your students.

Ashkea76

I just was given a caramel Starbuck's drink of some sort from a client today. I accepted with grace (I hope) and will say this...because of the work I do, and gift-giving policies, there are times when I've had to graciously say no to a gift...it can be very awkward....(I work for a brokerage firm, we have a gift acceptance policy, which includes no tickets, nothing of cash value, only food type items - a coffee, or plate of cookies that can be shared with the entire office, etc are able to be accepted). I have had to actually thank a client for a gift, and hand it back to them, saying our gift policy doesn't allow us to accept such a generous gift, but thank you for the kind thoughts and intentions....this has always been followed up by a personal thank you note to the client as well, that I mailed that day. it can be quite uncomfortable...I have wonderful clients...and I try to treat them all like you would your own grandmother (one you like )....

Teachers, (my sister is a teacher) often are overlooked in many aspects of our world, and to have a student care enough to give a gift to you (of ANY sort) speaks VOLUMES about the kind of teacher you are. Kudos to you on being an awesome, caring teacher, and yes, it's hard when you first start your weightloss...I've been losing and relosing the same 5 pounds...but think you did the right thing, FOR YOU (and your thoughtful student). :flowerforyou:

ahmadfahmy

Any suggestions on how to accept this gift without adding it to my food log? I'm not ready to come out of the dieting closet and I don't want to offend. I really appreciate the gesture. I love my job, but food surprises are a part of my problem. If there is a cookie laying out, I'm eating it.

1 drink isnt going to kill your diet.

jdm_taco

Im a teacher and whenever kids bring stuff I just assume its spit in and toss it out. You may want to do the same. lol

toutmonpossible

Did anyone else notice the OP say she will eat a cookie if she sees one laying out but is worried about a single mocha that a student gives her? I think the more important issue isn't how to decline a mocha but maybe rethink how she eats during day or try to change some habits?

Of course I noticed. She understands that she has a problem with sweets and she's concerned about this additional problem. It is harder to avoid eating things that have been offered to us because we don't want to seem ungrateful. A mocha can be well over 200 calories. It adds up, in addition to whatever else is in her house.

Exactly my point then of changing habits. I'm sure coming across other temptations, like a cookie laying out, would occur way more often than a mocha being offered. I got the impression the mocha was a one time thing, but until the OP responds how often it occurs, it may have been a single time as far as we know.

You're perfectly right. My assumption that this was a repeating problem was based on the OP's coming to the forum and asking for suggestions.

_skinnydreaming

You could accept it while the student is there, then "accidentally" spill it into the garbage when they're gone

I would do this!

mazdauk

Accept it and be gracious. Explain that you're watching your waistline (or cutting back on caffeine or whatever), so you can't accept a gift like this every day, but you're grateful for the kind thought. Have a little, log the calories, go for an extra walk and be grateful that you have someone in your life who wants to do nice things for you.

THIS!

One of our teachers (who is retiring) brought in a lovely cake for us in the office to share - 344 calories a "serving" (but who can cut cake that thin???) I'll make sure my co-workers (who are not watching their intakes) finish it up.

rmchapman4

Many people, overweight and thin, are watching their sugar intake these days. I don't think there's any shame in thanking the student and declining. I mean, you do want people to stop offering you food you can't eat, right?

Just looked at your profile and see that the student was a probably a kid. it was a nice gesture, but one is never too young to understand that people have different needs. A thank you and an explanation should be enough.

*blink*



You know, OP, I think graciousness is a quality in short supply these days. It's a rare thing when anyone, young or not-so-much, takes the time to show appreciation and gratitude to their teachers, and when it happens, it should be met in kind. Accept the kindness with grace and class, and enjoy some of it. Or none of it. Whatever, deal with it on your own without explaining it to your student for heaven's sake. No one needs to have their generosity rejected, possibly to think twice before doing something nice in the future. There's already too little of it in the world.


Yes "Quiet Smile"; as a former elementary and middle school teacher---YOU get an "A" and the VIP student desk!! :flowerforyou: :smooched:

FakingFitness

extra 1/2 hour workout today and enjoy your mocha!

I love this idea! #winwin

monjacq1964

FFS don't spill it into the garbage. I get so disturbed at those who suggested wasting food this way on here, even as a joke. Anyway, I'd just try to find out how many calories it is---it may not be SO bad---& then just drink it, & walk it off later. I mean, a mocha iced latte is what, at most 200 calories? A good walk burns that off.

that's old thinking, wasting food. If its junk food, and you choose not to eat it, then give it away, or if you can't, then throw it out. IMHO, its better for me to throw it out, than it is to drink it "cuz its polite".

monjacq1964

Again, thank you for your responses. Please remember when posting that this site is for people who are trying to better themselves. Rarely does negativity help anyone.
[/quote]

well said.

bettysueANDboe

For my students, I either do take it (if you obsess then it will drive you crazy to deny every craving) OR politely decline; trust me, they will find a willing participant to accept it (perhaps even a crush???).

kmartinixx

I say drink it and log it. That student went out of his/her way to get you something, don't throw it in the garbage! You just owe that student an extra 30 minutes at the gym later! :-)

kappyblu

How sweet that the student brought that to you! Never refuse a gift from a child. If you don't want to drink it, don't. But the best option is to just enjoy the thing, log it, and move on. :flowerforyou: