having a lot of trouble committing
zorbaru
Posts: 1,077 Member
really having trouble losing weight. i want to lose weight. i know how to lose weight in terms of food and excercise. my issue is actually getting the body to do what the mind needs it to do.
every day i wake up saying "today is the day, im going to do this" and by lunch time im scoffing and iced coffee and eating crap again. if you look through my history on here, you will see that i have "restarted" many times.
it is really starting to get me down. i dont know what to do.
every day i wake up saying "today is the day, im going to do this" and by lunch time im scoffing and iced coffee and eating crap again. if you look through my history on here, you will see that i have "restarted" many times.
it is really starting to get me down. i dont know what to do.
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Replies
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Do you work in an office or something during the day (as opposed to working at home, going to school, etc)?
If so, set yourself up for success.
First, identify your bad habits. Buying an iced coffee? Getting a treat from the vending machine? Etc.
Second, set things up so that you CANNOT indulge in that habit. You can't buy an iced coffee if you leave your cash and credit card at home, for example. If you snack at home: stop buying whatever food is your downfall. You don't have to 'never eat it again' or anything; but wait until your body isn't demanding / expecting it.
Third, pack a meal that is within your calorie goals for lunch.11 -
You have to want it more than you don't or more than you want the "crap". But if you can make the iced coffee and crap fit your calorie goals it will be a lot easier to commit. I drink iced coffee every single day.4
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Plan non-crap meals, buy real food ingredients, then prepare and bring non-crap foods you'll want more than any crap food. But you still have to execute your non-crap plan by eating what you made and not buy and eat crap.10
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Try just logging what you eat for a while. No judgement. Have the iced coffee and whatever else, just log it and see what it does to the numbers. You may find that over time you become naturally less inclined to eat things that are bad value calorie-wise and just seeing clearly what you are putting in your mouth and the consequences may give you the motivation you need.20
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You need to find your 'why'. Until you do that it'll always be half hearted and will never really work5
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Are you trying to do "all or nothing"? A lot of people go from eating pretty much only junk to "rabbit food" and then wonder why they can't last a day or two. Plan your meals, plan your treats and it becomes easier for a lot of people.11
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I said to myself after years of wanting to lose weight I do NOT want to be sitting on my couch this time next year, still fat and unhealthy, another year wasted, another lot of "I'm gonna" and saying the same thing when I Cld be sitting there proud of myself, skinny, healthy, confident and not having to spend MORE of my life wasted on being unhappy and unhealthy. So I just did it. I obviously no we are all unique, different people with different mindsets but for me, I want to look back on my last 5 years in my 30's with no regrets. I hope u find the commitment and strength to do it, we ALL have these qualities:-)6
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Is your goal very aggressive ? Sometimes when my goal is too aggressive I don't even want to get started . Start slow, have a small deficit and then as you gain track , go for a bigger deficit if you wish8
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It all in our heads
Sort your head out the rest will follow
I have many times stuck to plan for over a year then bam I've lost that willpower and resort to old
Just gradually make changes don't do the all or nothing start with calorie reduction then do a walking plan don't go full steam into something that you know isn't manageable forever3 -
It all in our heads
Sort your head out the rest will follow
I have many times stuck to plan for over a year then bam I've lost that willpower and resort to old
Just gradually make changes don't do the all or nothing start with calorie reduction then do a walking plan don't go full steam into something that you know isn't manageable forever
I completely agree with this. It is all in your head. I tried to lose weight for years and then I had a silly "a ha" moment and finally decided I was going to lose weight no matter what. You don't want to try to make a lot of changes all at once because it is too overwhelming. Just make one healthy decision at a time and build upon that. When I first started losing weight, I told myself I was going to workout 5 times a week. That was it. Nothing with my diet or anything else. Once I started working out 5 days a week, I felt so good, I then added the rule of only having alcohol on weekends and not during the week. I stuck with JUST those two rules for several months and lost 30 pounds. Then I bought a heart rate monitor and started counting calories and eating a lot less processed food and went on to lose 66 pounds total. It did take about 2 years but as everyone here says, it is a marathon not a race. And yes, I gained about 20 pounds back over the last few years (due to being in a relationship with someone with unhealthy habits, a medication I went on, and quitting smoking) but I am back at it again and have only lost about 4 pounds since the beginning of February but I can't let myself get down because it will mess with my head and I will fail. I know I just need to get back to how my lifestyle was when I lost weight before and once I get used to it, it will be second nature. It is hard at first making changes and getting used to doing something differently than you are used to (eating differently, counting calories, working out, etc) but it DOES get easier.3 -
really having trouble losing weight. i want to lose weight. i know how to lose weight in terms of food and excercise. my issue is actually getting the body to do what the mind needs it to do.
every day i wake up saying "today is the day, im going to do this" and by lunch time im scoffing and iced coffee and eating crap again. if you look through my history on here, you will see that i have "restarted" many times.
it is really starting to get me down. i dont know what to do.
Think you'll find it's the other way around the mind is the problem, not the body. I posted this recently on another thread, those in bold may help:- Make sure your stats are correct in MFP, including your activity level (none-exercise activity)
- Choose a manageable weight loss rate (assume you'd like it to stay off)
- Don't make drastic changes to what you're eating straight away, try logging what you're already eating for 2-3 days and see where you are taking the extra calories in - then you can look at ways to reduce them (such as reducing portion sizes, switching for lower calorie options, etc).
- Don't panic about macros and micronutrients until you've got a handle on your calorie deficit.
- Be prepared for a life-long journey instead of a quick fix.
- If you don't already have one get a food scale - this is the most accurate way to ensure calorific intake is correct.
- If you're logging exercise via the MFP database/machine readings without consistent heart rate monitoring be wary of the calorie burns given. Most MFP folks will recommend only eating 50% of you exercise calories back until you can get a few weeks of data to see how it affects your weight loss rate
- Add people as friends or join groups here on the forums for accountability.
- Read through the stickied posts on the Get Started and the General Diet boards there is a lot of useful information already here.
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TavistockToad wrote: »You need to find your 'why'. Until you do that it'll always be half hearted and will never really work
^^^ This. This was the only thing that got me started, finding my "why". I didn't want the change enough last year, even though I hated how I looked, hated how I felt. It clicked for me this past New Years Eve and I've been on the good path since. Find your "why".3 -
Do, or do not. There is no try.8
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It is only you that can control this, a virtual kick does not hurt. To prevent excuses, work out when you wake up if that will be part of your program, which will set you up for the day, and make you feel like you can conquer the world, and make your own lunch to bring to work, to cut out the crap food. But the only one that can convince you is you0
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I'm a serial starter too. I know that point in the day when I would feel like this was a bad day to start because (fill in the blank) so I'll just eat what I really want right now and start over tomorrow or next week or next month.
For me it was high stress and depression and insomnia that were making it hard for me to take on yet another big project...that project being to lose weight. Taking steps to deal with those disrupters helped me to focus on the bigger picture and my goals instead of medicating my despair in the moment.
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Don't take your wallet to work if possible. I would bring well thought out and prepared meals, eat them, and eat chips and chocolate from the canteen anyway. Once I stopped bringing cash I stopped eating from there and broke the bad habit. Now I can bring my wallet to work and not feel the need to buy anything1
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Try hypnosis or - better yet - EFT ... if you know what you need to do and just aren't doing it, the mental / emotional arena is likely where you need to work.0
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I can only make small changes at a time. It takes me about 2 months to make that small change stick as a habit then I can do another small change. So why don't you start with one small habit change. Now today start logging everything everything that you eat and drink. Give yourself a few weeks then add another good habit maybe packing lunch and snacks or having plain coffee instead of fancy coffee dessert .4
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It really helps to have a weight-loss partner. Someone with whom you can be honest. Share your diaries and have at it again.
Yes, and plan your eats. If you want an iced coffee every day with a snack, then have it. Find a way to make it work in your daliy budget.
And take your time. No need to lose weight quickly.
Best of luck. You are counting on you!1 -
You might want to get a copy of the "Beck Diet Solution" book, which is a cognitive-behavioral approach that will help with the head (cognitive) part.
http://www.beckdietsolution.com0 -
You have to really want to change your existing eating habits. Try shouldn't come into it, as the ad goes 'Just Do It'
Set yourself small goals/ pre plan your days meals and don't buy the things that are calorie dense. Little by little you can change how you see food.
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the statement in your mind should go "I have to" rather than "I want to" (even if you "really" want to)0
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really having trouble losing weight. i want to lose weight. i know how to lose weight in terms of food and excercise. my issue is actually getting the body to do what the mind needs it to do.
every day i wake up saying "today is the day, im going to do this" and by lunch time im scoffing and iced coffee and eating crap again. if you look through my history on here, you will see that i have "restarted" many times.
it is really starting to get me down. i dont know what to do.
I was in the same boat for few years. I knew my why. I knew what to do. But what I finally realized that my lifestyle was SOOO complex and SOOO ingrained, trying to go from 0-60 on the diet track just wasn't working for me. So over a year and a half ago, I decided to switch my thought process from "dieting" to changing my lifestyle. From there, I picked one, just one, issue at a time and stuck to just that one until I felt I finally had it down. I decided to start with exercise, simply because I knew it was something I actually enjoyed, so I knew the motivation wouldn't be as hard. I also vowed not to beat myself up over failures, but rather look at them as lifestyle problems to solve. So I started with walking. Set a goal to try and get 2 miles in 5 days a week. I did fine for a few weeks, until my knees and hips started killing me. So a took a week off to let them heal and started again...same thing. I stayed in the cycle for a few months, but found walking was not really doing it for me. But instead of getting frustrated and giving up, I instead looked at it like a problem to solve. What kind of exercise would I enjoy doing that wasn't going to kill my joints. I settled on swimming, something I love doing. Of course, there were a few others issues to solve before I could finally afford the gym and carve out the right time to go, but after 9 months, the issues were solved and I had finally managed a great fitness routine that included swimming, water aerobics and walking. I had managed to stick to it for 3 months and felt great, even though the scale didn't really budge much at all.
Since then, I've tackled my soda drinking habit (took a couple of months), my breakfast meal (only took a couple weeks), my morning routine (another month), then pushed on to a salad every day for lunch (another month). They were all little changes that only showed a total of a 5lb loss, but I felt great and felt motivated to keep going.
Finally, came back to MFP in January to start counting calories and work on creating the deficit needed to try and get more serious about the weightloss side of things. Spent the month of January getting into the habit of logging my food and being honest with myself on what I was eating. By the end of the month, all new habits still going strong and another 5lbs gone. February, I spent 3 weeks incorporating more fruit into my diet. That helped curb my awful sugar cravings and seriously cut back the amount of refined sweets I was eating. Another 5lbs gone. I've spent the last 3 weeks working on incorporating more vegetables at dinner time. Another 5lbs gone.
So yeah.. Just under 2 years and I may have only lost 20lbs... but I'VE LOST 20lbs!!! I also am far less stressed, better able to tackle the daily demands of my day, I'm sleeping better, enjoying life more, my work performance has shot up drastically, My finances are under control and this whole losing weight things feels kinda like a breeze now.14 -
HealthyVitamins wrote: »Don't take your wallet to work if possible. I would bring well thought out and prepared meals, eat them, and eat chips and chocolate from the canteen anyway. Once I stopped bringing cash I stopped eating from there and broke the bad habit. Now I can bring my wallet to work and not feel the need to buy anything
Ha, the wallet thing worked for me too! Well, not bringing cash anyway.
I would bring good things, and eat them, and enjoy them. But I would still grab food from the vending machine. And of course I wouldn't log them because I'm embarrassed (although no one else is looking at my diary!) and then I would eat something else not as good at home out of guilt. When I wouldn't lose weight, I'd just stop working at it for a couple months and have to start over 10lbs heavier.
So I stopped bringing cash to work, and so I couldn't get my extras, and I got over the habit of doing it. I still struggle with not going out to lunch every day, but since it's still wintry outside, I really don't feel like going out most days. And I don't have a problem when it's nice outside, since I usually go out for a walk at lunch.
I'm glad I dropped the habit when I did, because they just put a damn credit card reader on the vending machine a couple weeks ago. It makes the (already overpriced) goodies 5 cents more, and darn it if the old me wouldn't have cared. I would have been grabbing 3-4 candy bars and chips each day anyway, perhaps more so since I'm not limited by how much cash I had on hand!
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...my issue is actually getting the body to do what the mind needs it to do...
I would say your problem is actually the opposite.
You need to get the mind to do what the body needs it to do. Trouble committing is not a fault of the body. The mind is making the choices here, and the body is just following along.
You need to figure out why you keep failing. What's your motivation? How badly to you really want this? You have to want this change more than you want the comfort and familiarity of your old ways. Until this becomes a bigger priority than some of your other choices, you aren't likely to change.
Change can be scary. Are you attempting to make these changes at too fast a pace and either burning out or psyching yourself out? Start gradually, make simple achievable changes, experience some small successes and build on those. Everybody loves to win. So set easier, more attainable goals to start, so you can feel the taste of victory. Once you start winning in small ways, you can set bigger goals.
This all comes down to getting your head in the game. Without the right mindset, you're just spinning your wheels. Good luck!1 -
Do not let yourself get too hungry, that's a big pitfall for me. Everything goes out the window if I'm starving.3
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It can be REALLY difficult! That's ok. Its ok to have bad days, its ok to fall. It's ok to not be good enough. It's ok to lose really slowly. It's ok to gain back 1 pound after losing 2. You just get back up and start again. I've done it, too. I was depressed all winter and logging was too hard. I am constantly fighting the munchies! But at the end of the day, I'm a bit fitter, and a bit stronger than the day before. Every little thing helps. On the contrary, it's little things that makes it hard. Sometimes you just gotta try different things and see what works for you. It's all in the baby steps1
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For me I just have to keep telling myself WHY I am here and on CICO. I want to be slender and healthy as opposed to morbidly obese. I am half way down to my goal since starting May 2016. It can be difficult but I just have to stay focused on the end game.... good luck you can do it!0
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really having trouble losing weight. i want to lose weight. i know how to lose weight in terms of food and excercise. my issue is actually getting the body to do what the mind needs it to do.
every day i wake up saying "today is the day, im going to do this" and by lunch time im scoffing and iced coffee and eating crap again. if you look through my history on here, you will see that i have "restarted" many times.
it is really starting to get me down. i dont know what to do.
Hello, what I think will work for you is to build your diet around the food you're eating. You have to trick your mind and body into thinking you're eating certain foods, but in actuality your cutting most of the unhealthy carbs. For example, I eat Taco Bell daily, but I modify the food so I can get the best out of it. If I order a chicken burrito i ask to remove any type of dressing, sauce, and cheese, I eat everything inside and throw the giant tortilla in the trash. And I drink lots of water in between bites, also I eat a small bowl of fruit I get at the nearest 7/11. And a cup of coffee with a little French vanilla cream. My cravings for eating a burrito are gone.2 -
I paid $1.00 for 4oz of mixed fruit at 7/11.
You can eat any foods just make better choices.
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