How do you kill the crab?
CWynne3
Posts: 116 Member
I'm on Day 1 of Week 2 of my lifestyle change. It's going great in terms of weight loss, but... DEAR GOD, have MERCY on everyone around me! I feel so incredibly annoyed and irritable that I'm seriously getting on my own nerves! I hear myself being snappy and I'm aware I've developed a major 'tude, but I can't for the life of me get it under control! This is the part of my life change attempts where I always say, "Screw it," and give up. But not this time... I can't quit. My life is depending on this change.
...So any pointers on how to kill this crabbiness that has become me? It would appear that fulfilling whatever craving I may have had at any given time in the past has acted as a "happy pill"... What the heck do I do now that that's not an option? Give it to me straight. I won't bite... too hard.
...So any pointers on how to kill this crabbiness that has become me? It would appear that fulfilling whatever craving I may have had at any given time in the past has acted as a "happy pill"... What the heck do I do now that that's not an option? Give it to me straight. I won't bite... too hard.
3
Replies
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You're on a two week lifestyle change? I don't get it.
I don't control my crab. I called a lady on the subway a kitten kitten last week and threw money down on the bodega register because they wouldn't accept a debit card for less than 5 dollars (even though that's the norm and I'm used to it).2 -
Eat a Snickers?33
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How long does it take to prepare for a marathon, or a climb up mount Everest? This sort of life-change is built on one small habit at a time. Trying to do it all at once will just make you....crabby.
Yes, your life is at stake, but you have some time to do this right.
What one change this past week are you most proud of? Keep doing that one. What change makes you want to claw someone's eyes out? Postpone that one.
Every week re-evaluate the week before and decide to either stay the course or add a new self-improvement bit.14 -
You're on a two week lifestyle change? I don't get it.
I don't control my crab. I called a lady on the subway a kitten kitten last week and threw money down on the bodega register because they wouldn't accept a debit card for less than 5 dollars (even though that's the norm and I'm used to it).
No, no... I'm on my second week of said change... As in I just started one week and one day ago... And in response to the subway lady/debit card deal, I'm not generally a crabby person, so that's why it's gotta go. Doesn't work for me.3 -
Self flagellation. Works every time.5
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Chef_Barbell wrote: »Eat a Snickers?
I feel like slapping someone with a Snickers.9 -
You're on a two week lifestyle change? I don't get it.
I don't control my crab. I called a lady on the subway a kitten kitten last week and threw money down on the bodega register because they wouldn't accept a debit card for less than 5 dollars (even though that's the norm and I'm used to it).
No, no... I'm on my second week of said change... As in I just started one week and one day ago... And in response to the subway lady/debit card deal, I'm not generally a crabby person, so that's why it's gotta go. Doesn't work for me.
Okay. So do it then. Take a nap and eat a candy bar.2 -
How long does it take to prepare for a marathon, or a climb up mount Everest? This sort of life-change is built on one small habit at a time. Trying to do it all at once will just make you....crabby.
Yes, your life is at stake, but you have some time to do this right.
What one change this past week are you most proud of? Keep doing that one. What change makes you want to claw someone's eyes out? Postpone that one.
Every week re-evaluate the week before and decide to either stay the course or add a new self-improvement bit.
I guess I have this "all in" mentality. I'm either all in or I'm not.
Changes I'm proud of:
1. Cutting my 5ish Coke/day habit
2. Drinking water instead
3. Sticking below 1300 calories a day/portion control
4. Meeting my protein goals
5. Cutting sweets and processed foods
Changes pissing me off:
1. Cutting coke when others in the house drink it in front of me...
2. No sweets/processed foods when it's all still in the house.
3. Cooking separate meals for my fam because they aren't into eating my stuff.
But you make a great point. All the changes take time and I think regardless of whether I make changes one at a time or all at once, I'm going to take time to adjust. I just hope this irritability phase doesn't last long. Sucks. 2 -
Changes pissing me off:
1. Cutting coke when others in the house drink it in front of me...
2. No sweets/processed foods when it's all still in the house.
3. Cooking separate meals for my fam because they aren't into eating my stuff.[/quote]
As to cooking separately, told my family if I'm cooking it's my way. Though my family was happy with it.. You don't have to cook differently for them. Kinda my way or the highway attitude.11 -
This is a real thing. Calorie deficits will do this to you, especially large deficits. Not getting enough fat will also mess with hormones. So yeah, don't think it's just you
The best advice I can give you is to have as small a deficit as possible while still making progress. I don't know what your stats are, but many people achieve good loss and don't murder anyone on about 250 deficit per day less than TDEE. That's about 0.5 lbs per week.5 -
Changes pissing me off:
1. Cutting coke when others in the house drink it in front of me...
2. No sweets/processed foods when it's all still in the house.
3. Cooking separate meals for my fam because they aren't into eating my stuff.
As to cooking separately, told my family if I'm cooking it's my way. Though my family was happy with it.. You don't have to cook differently for them. Kinda my way or the highway attitude.[/quote]
I feel ultimately, eating clean will be beneficial to all of us. But my husband isn't ready to make that change. Then I think too, I'm the one who's gotten myself to this weight, I'm the one that needs to make thesacrifices. Kinda hard not being all on the same page.2 -
If you are crabby, it sounds like you are either:
1) trying to change too much at once (ie, on some sort of restrictive diet rather than just reducing your calories),
2) you aren't eating enough (ie, deficit too high / trying to lose more than a pound or two a week), or
3) you aren't satiated / feeling full with what you are eating (ie, you may need more protein/fat than you are getting (unless carbs work for you then you may need to bump those up) - for me, protein/fat keeps me fuller than carbs, but YMMV).
My guess would be that you have an imbalance in one (or more) of those situations and you need to adjust to not be so hangry (which is why I
the snickers recommendation).
When I started MFP, I was so stoked. I could eat anything again, and only had to reduce my calories...it was liberating for me after trying so many restrictive diets that didn't really work for me. Bacon made it back into my eating, as well as full fat cheeses, and wine wasn't forbidden. The more I learned, the more I realized I had been restricting myself too much, and I just needed to maintain a calorie deficit to lose. Now, over time I learned that I needed to work on balancing my macros for nutrition (and I still have to work on that some days). But my first weeks on MFP and counting calories was glorious although shocking when I figured how small real single serving sizes were...and that's why I had put on most of my weight.
Good luck figuring it out...it's no fun being crabby unless it is your nature to be crabby.9 -
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You're probably pissed because you mistakenly think you have to turn your world upside down to lose weight, you don't. You probably also have your deficit set to lose 2 lbs a week. I'd be pissed too. Drop the unnecessary "all in" BS mentality. All you need is a caloric deficit and it doesn't have to be big. Set your goal to 1 lb/week and eat normally up to your allotted calories. You don't need to cook separate meals, cut out sweets or processed foods or only drinking water. Now go have a fun-size Snickers and a mini-Coke (maybe diet) and be happy 13
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Try diet Coke or Coke Zero. No calories and you can have your 5 a day. I'd log for the sodium though, but that's me.
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How did you come up with 1350?
How much weight do you need to lose, AND did you set the goal wizard here at "Lose two pounds per week"? If so, dial it back to "Lose one pound per week." You'll get more calories and you will feel better.
Also, I see your beautiful baby in your picture. I'm guessing with a husband and a baby you are not "Sedentary." Set your goals as "Lightly active" - you'll get more calories. More restriction isn't better - it makes us HANGRY!!
6 -
This is a real thing. Calorie deficits will do this to you, especially large deficits. Not getting enough fat will also mess with hormones. So yeah, don't think it's just you
The best advice I can give you is to have as small a deficit as possible while still making progress. I don't know what your stats are, but many people achieve good loss and don't murder anyone on about 250 deficit per day less than TDEE. That's about 0.5 lbs per week.
Honestly, I don't think the "how much I can have" is what's most bothersome to me... It's the "what I can't have" that's frustrating me the most. I weighed in on 4/25 at 273.8lbs (I'm 5'6"). Followed my doctor's advice to a T and weighed in at 263.0 yesterday, 5/1. Obviously a ton of that's gotta be water weight, but I lost 2" from my waist and .5" from my hips. So, it's working. That drives me to keep pushing through... But I'm like a frickin' bomb. Just hate being this way. I'm sure with my weight I could put myself at a lesser deficit and still lose weight. But I still would have the food restrictions... Idk. Maybe this rotten phase will pass soon. 0 -
If you give yourself more calories you can have a Coke. I had ice cream today, and white bread with peanut butter. This has to be something you can do - not that you are going to resent and then give up.
When we say "restricting" we mean both amount and types of foods. You have to be able to eat the things you love on occasion. Not maybe five Cokes, but one a day should fit in. You'll likely get to the point where Coke isn't worth the calories but you're not there yet and you're seriously struggling. If it's a struggle you may just give up. Make it work for you. Tell yourself you can have ice cream (or whatever) on Friday, OR fit it in your calories today. In time you'll make better choices more often but ease into it if it's causing your inner toddler to throw herself on the floor kicking and screaming!
Or, you know, roll your eyes at her. Your choice.
6 -
I lost 45 lbs eating a giant chocolate bar everyday
You don't have to suffer12 -
Thinking you have to go "all-in" is a common theme with my weight loss group. All-in followed by collapse and failure.
Many of the success stories on here are from people who got comfortable in their own skin and were generous with themselves. One cookie does not a diet break.
If I were you I'd cook for family and portion for your diet with salad instead of fries. No more separate cooking.
How about diet pop?6 -
This is a real thing. Calorie deficits will do this to you, especially large deficits. Not getting enough fat will also mess with hormones. So yeah, don't think it's just you
The best advice I can give you is to have as small a deficit as possible while still making progress. I don't know what your stats are, but many people achieve good loss and don't murder anyone on about 250 deficit per day less than TDEE. That's about 0.5 lbs per week.
Honestly, I don't think the "how much I can have" is what's most bothersome to me... It's the "what I can't have" that's frustrating me the most. I weighed in on 4/25 at 273.8lbs (I'm 5'6"). Followed my doctor's advice to a T and weighed in at 263.0 yesterday, 5/1. Obviously a ton of that's gotta be water weight, but I lost 2" from my waist and .5" from my hips. So, it's working. That drives me to keep pushing through... But I'm like a frickin' bomb. Just hate being this way. I'm sure with my weight I could put myself at a lesser deficit and still lose weight. But I still would have the food restrictions... Idk. Maybe this rotten phase will pass soon.
You can eat whatever you want. Just account for it within your day. I saved 340 calories for my favorite kind of ice cream sandwich tonight simply because I've been craving it so badly. I just had to cut some calories from my lunch and one of my snacks earlier in the day. I still ate lunch and a snack- just lower calories in both so that I had some left to indulge my craving. As long as you're still eating at a deficit, you'll still lose!
This is baffling to me... I can go eat a roll if I want? It truly doesn't matter what I eat as long as I don't go over my limit? Don't the processed, starchy carbs make you gain, not lose? I guess the math makes sense... I'm just not getting how I can eat a slice of pizza or a piece of grilled chicken and a salad and arrive at the same results??2 -
A slice of pizza with a side salad is just about perfect, macro-wise. Calories are reasonable too.8
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This is a real thing. Calorie deficits will do this to you, especially large deficits. Not getting enough fat will also mess with hormones. So yeah, don't think it's just you
The best advice I can give you is to have as small a deficit as possible while still making progress. I don't know what your stats are, but many people achieve good loss and don't murder anyone on about 250 deficit per day less than TDEE. That's about 0.5 lbs per week.
Honestly, I don't think the "how much I can have" is what's most bothersome to me... It's the "what I can't have" that's frustrating me the most. I weighed in on 4/25 at 273.8lbs (I'm 5'6"). Followed my doctor's advice to a T and weighed in at 263.0 yesterday, 5/1. Obviously a ton of that's gotta be water weight, but I lost 2" from my waist and .5" from my hips. So, it's working. That drives me to keep pushing through... But I'm like a frickin' bomb. Just hate being this way. I'm sure with my weight I could put myself at a lesser deficit and still lose weight. But I still would have the food restrictions... Idk. Maybe this rotten phase will pass soon.
You can eat whatever you want. Just account for it within your day. I saved 340 calories for my favorite kind of ice cream sandwich tonight simply because I've been craving it so badly. I just had to cut some calories from my lunch and one of my snacks earlier in the day. I still ate lunch and a snack- just lower calories in both so that I had some left to indulge my craving. As long as you're still eating at a deficit, you'll still lose!
This is baffling to me... I can go eat a roll if I want? It truly doesn't matter what I eat as long as I don't go over my limit? Don't the processed, starchy carbs make you gain, not lose? I guess the math makes sense... I'm just not getting how I can eat a slice of pizza or a piece of grilled chicken and a salad and arrive at the same results??
How is it baffling? If they are the same amount of calories .....?
For satiety, it might not be the best idea to eat absolutely what you want every day. For example, one slice of pizza can be the same amount of calories as a huge salad filled with veggies and lean meat. You might not feel as full on a slice of pizza. But, calories in/calories out.3 -
cmriverside wrote: »How did you come up with 1350?
How much weight do you need to lose, AND did you set the goal wizard here at "Lose two pounds per week"? If so, dial it back to "Lose one pound per week." You'll get more calories and you will feel better.
Also, I see your beautiful baby in your picture. I'm guessing with a husband and a baby you are not "Sedentary." Set your goals as "Lightly active" - you'll get more calories. More restriction isn't better - it makes us HANGRY!!
This is my doctor... Telling me I'm morbidly obese and should consume 1200-1300 calories a day max. I need to cut the processed foods, lose the soda, etc. So that's what I've been doing for 8 days now... Though it feels like 80 days!
I have 4 beautiful babies! 10, 7, 3 and 1! I homeschool the oldest 3. Between that, play dates, and keeping up with my house... I stay pretty busy. Half the time I don't even get to sit down to eat. But I don't go out and exercise or take walks at all (yet)...so... sedentary?1 -
If you are crabby, it sounds like you are either:
1) trying to change too much at once (ie, on some sort of restrictive diet rather than just reducing your calories),
2) you aren't eating enough (ie, deficit too high / trying to lose more than a pound or two a week), or
3) you aren't satiated / feeling full with what you are eating (ie, you may need more protein/fat than you are getting (unless carbs work for you then you may need to bump those up) - for me, protein/fat keeps me fuller than carbs, but YMMV).
My guess would be that you have an imbalance in one (or more) of those situations and you need to adjust to not be so hangry (which is why I the snickers recommendation).
When I started MFP, I was so stoked. I could eat anything again, and only had to reduce my calories...it was liberating for me after trying so many restrictive diets that didn't really work for me. Bacon made it back into my eating, as well as full fat cheeses, and wine wasn't forbidden. The more I learned, the more I realized I had been restricting myself too much, and I just needed to maintain a calorie deficit to lose. Now, over time I learned that I needed to work on balancing my macros for nutrition (and I still have to work on that some days). But my first weeks on MFP and counting calories was glorious although shocking when I figured how small real single serving sizes were...and that's why I had put on most of my weight.
Good luck figuring it out...it's no fun being crabby unless it is your nature to be crabby.
Thanks so much for sharing your experience! Maybe I'm going about this all wrong...1 -
cmriverside wrote: »How did you come up with 1350?
How much weight do you need to lose, AND did you set the goal wizard here at "Lose two pounds per week"? If so, dial it back to "Lose one pound per week." You'll get more calories and you will feel better.
Also, I see your beautiful baby in your picture. I'm guessing with a husband and a baby you are not "Sedentary." Set your goals as "Lightly active" - you'll get more calories. More restriction isn't better - it makes us HANGRY!!
This is my doctor... Telling me I'm morbidly obese and should consume 1200-1300 calories a day max. I need to cut the processed foods, lose the soda, etc. So that's what I've been doing for 8 days now... Though it feels like 80 days!
I have 4 beautiful babies! 10, 7, 3 and 1! I homeschool the oldest 3. Between that, play dates, and keeping up with my house... I stay pretty busy. Half the time I don't even get to sit down to eat. But I don't go out and exercise or take walks at all (yet)...so... sedentary?
Cutting sugary drinks is helpful. You might be able to still fit one in here and there. Processed foods don't have anything to do with calories and weight loss. I'd also enter your stats into MFP and see how many calories it gives you. It's hard to drop to 1200 calories. Especially if you don't need to. If your TDEE is over 2200 calories you could still lose 2 lbs per week eating MORE than 1200.3 -
I read somewhere that doctors prescribe low, low calorie diets because they have little faith that the patient will stick with it and they figure the few pounds lost in the short term is better than nothing.9
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Thinking you have to go "all-in" is a common theme with my weight loss group. All-in followed by collapse and failure.
Many of the success stories on here are from people who got comfortable in their own skin and were generous with themselves. One cookie does not a diet break.
If I were you I'd cook for family and portion for your diet with salad instead of fries. No more separate cooking.
How about diet pop?
I could totally do diet! That would make me super happy, actually, lol. I think I realize I've got major weight to lose and I feel it's going to take major change to make it happen. But maybe I've got it all wrong...6 -
I read somewhere that doctors prescribe low, low calorie diets because they have little faith that the patient will stick with it and they figure the few pounds lost in the short term is better than nothing.
That and they probably assume they won't come on here and start weighing their food on a scale and logging accurately as well. So what the prescribe as 1200, probably ends up being closer to 1500 or more.7
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