Are you a narcissistic person?
A few years ago I went through an extremely narcissistic phase where I lost weight, loved selfies, looked damn sexy and was generally happy so long as I was getting attention...
These days, i'm almost the polar opposite. I'm still in okay shape, hate selfies, potentially still sexy and generally happy, though I miss being cut, fast and getting all the good kinds of attention?
Does this make me a self loathing narcissist?
These days, i'm almost the polar opposite. I'm still in okay shape, hate selfies, potentially still sexy and generally happy, though I miss being cut, fast and getting all the good kinds of attention?
Does this make me a self loathing narcissist?
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Replies
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Narcissism is VERY unattractive. I understand wanting to look your very best and enjoying some attention. You can do that and still NOT be a narcissist. Humility is WAY more attractive than being arrogant and full of yourself. That's just my 2 cents.4
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We all are attention hos. Why else be on this site. Duh.7
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Do you deem a lot about yourself through the validation others gives you? Answer this question and you have your answer.0
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I wouldn't say that I am so much a narcissist, as just a ridiculously selfish and self-centered person...so half of a psychological narcissist, I guess.1
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From my POV, everyone is narcissistic. It's necessary for survival.2
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My therapist said that my narcissism causes me to misread social situations.
I’m pretty sure she was hitting on me.
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Only when its about me, which it almost inevitably is....because i'm awesome.0
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OutOfUserName wrote: »i cant tell from your profile photo
That was what I thought was my narcissistic days on the left (I had dropped from 26.5%BF to 7% and was proud) and more presently at about 22% on the right.
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happilymegan wrote: »I think I'm pretty awesome. And I don't care if anyone disagrees. That might qualify me as a narcissist but I've spent many years on the other side of the fence hating myself so if that's what people want to think then by all means do so. Loving yourself is healthy.
I think this is my problem... Knowing the difference between loving oneself and the fruits of labour OR being a narcissist. I don't think I'm arrogant or full of myself because I see all my flaws and there are many so maybe I'm just a little lost in what I was then to where I am now.
I don't think having taken the time away to read up Narcissistic Personality Syndrome that it was necessarily narcissism... More just proud of my hard works results.0 -
If I had an amazing body, was hung or skilled like a porn star, rich or successful, or famous like a rock star I would totally be a d-bag narcissist. I believe that my blessing for better humility and being able to focus on other people beside myself is being the epitome of average in all regards. Happily so...2
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Ironandwine69 wrote: »We all are attention hos. Why else be on this site. Duh.gamerbabe14 wrote: »From my POV, everyone is narcissistic. It's necessary for survival.
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up to this point, i've never started a thread on chit-chat about my qualities. so, no, not yet. but i'm working on it.0 -
Ironandwine69 wrote: »We all are attention hos. Why else be on this site. Duh.
I can't tell if you're joking, but I kind of agree with this.
I mean, look at how many posts are in the selfie thread. I don't care what anyone says, if you post in there you want attention. I think there's nothing wrong with that, obviously, since I've posted in there before, but come on. If you post something of yourself anywhere you want attention from it.
I realize that doesn't make any of us full-blown narcissists who get gratification from their own appearance, but I do think more of us (than a lot of us would care to admit) are vain attention-seekers.
I was only partially joking. Some call it motivation some call it attention, but even closing your diary for the day is an attention seeking act. Not saying there's anything wrong with it. But if it was just for yourself, you wouldn't even close it.
Attention is a good motivator for most people.0 -
Everyone likes getting attention.. Be proud of what you accomplish, and sometimes you just gotta flaunt it!!! I love it when I get dressed up in a nice suit and head out to dinner or a function.. Makes ya feel good about yourself!!! (I feel kinda James Bond-ish) lol0
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Contrary to popular belief, true narcissists have a lack of self love. Which is why they need the attention from others so much. It's the opposite of codependent, which interestingly enough is also someone with a lack of self love...just a different coping mechanism. I'm definitely more on the codepdent side of the bar. Which most people think means you aren't independent...which is absolutely not true. You are actually usually more independent. The difference is codependents GIVE to feel important and narcissists TAKE to feel important. Ideally we should be able to love ourselves and fit somewhere in the middle of those two.
Talking about taking selfies and caring about how you look...I don't think that equals narcissistic. Maybe vain...but who isn't lol1 -
Very few people do anything for a totally unselfish reason. Think about it.
Almost everything I (and others) do is for a self reward.
If you can name something you do that is totally unselfish, I'd love to hear about it.0 -
What you're describing is run-of-the-mill vanity. It's often transitory and situational. Narcissism is related to personality disorder. It's deeper, darker and almost always a permanent fixture in the character.
This is more or less what I was going to say, but you said it so clearly. You and I can be friends.1 -
TheRoadDog wrote: »Very few people do anything for a totally unselfish reason. Think about it.
Almost everything I (and others) do is for a self reward.
If you can name something you do that is totally unselfish, I'd love to hear about it.
Really? I gather you've never done any volunteer work. There are TONS of things you can do unselfishly.3 -
TheRoadDog wrote: »Very few people do anything for a totally unselfish reason. Think about it.
Almost everything I (and others) do is for a self reward.
If you can name something you do that is totally unselfish, I'd love to hear about it.
Nobody can win this game. If I told you the unselfish thing I'd done, I'd be telling you for the sole purpose of getting "credit" for it, thereby negating its totally unselfish motivation.
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TheRoadDog wrote: »Very few people do anything for a totally unselfish reason. Think about it.
Almost everything I (and others) do is for a self reward.
If you can name something you do that is totally unselfish, I'd love to hear about it.
Really? I gather you've never done any volunteer work. There are TONS of things you can do unselfishly.
^^ This, as well as raising children. The things I have done and do for them is not for self reward or self satisfaction, but for their good and well-being.1 -
JeepHair77 wrote: »TheRoadDog wrote: »Very few people do anything for a totally unselfish reason. Think about it.
Almost everything I (and others) do is for a self reward.
If you can name something you do that is totally unselfish, I'd love to hear about it.
Nobody can win this game. If I told you the unselfish thing I'd done, I'd be telling you for the sole purpose of getting "credit" for it, thereby negating its totally unselfish motivation.
This is more or less what I was going to say, but you said it so clearly. You and I can be friends.1 -
TheRoadDog wrote: »Very few people do anything for a totally unselfish reason. Think about it.
Almost everything I (and others) do is for a self reward.
If you can name something you do that is totally unselfish, I'd love to hear about it.
Really? I gather you've never done any volunteer work. There are TONS of things you can do unselfishly.
^^ This, as well as raising children. The things I have done and do for them is not for self reward or self satisfaction, but for their good and well-being.
Totally. Every single day I do something that is not for me at all. In fact, I hardly do anything for self reward and sometimes I upset myself because I'm always last on the list of priorities.1 -
For me raising my children is the biggest reward and pay off I've experienced! It's not solely out of responsibility for me...i truly enjoy and love every part of it and find it extremely rewarding. That's not being selfish...but it's still a pay off. Not sure why people think the pay off is a bad thing. It's not. It's being human and the very thing that motivates us to do what we do and progress and evolve as humans.0
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TheRoadDog wrote: »Very few people do anything for a totally unselfish reason. Think about it.
Almost everything I (and others) do is for a self reward.
If you can name something you do that is totally unselfish, I'd love to hear about it.
Really? I gather you've never done any volunteer work. There are TONS of things you can do unselfishly.
I think that it can be unselfish for sure, but you still feel good about having volunteered, and that's part of the reason you do it.
Feeling good about what you've done isn't inherently bad, but you can't deny that if you give $5.00 to a homeless man, pay for a coffee for the person in line behind you, or spend the day planting trees, all of that makes you feel good about yourself.
I have to disagree. It's not part of the reason I do it at all. If its in my heart to help someone, I'll help and not expect anything in return, not even a good feeling. It's not about me.3 -
Everybody wants attention ESPECIALLY females. Females, no matter how ugly they are or insecure, crave it. With a hot woman.....we all know her ego is gonna be sky high. If you're hitting your goals and are either leaner/ripped or muscular, you want a way to show that off. That's why I wear clothes that show off that I lift. I don't wear baggy clothes anymore like I did in hs/early college days. Everybody likes to feel good about themselves.Everyone likes getting attention.. Be proud of what you accomplish, and sometimes you just gotta flaunt it!!! I love it when I get dressed up in a nice suit and head out to dinner or a function.. Makes ya feel good about yourself!!! (I feel kinda James Bond-ish) lolContrary to popular belief, true narcissists have a lack of self love. Which is why they need the attention from others so much. It's the opposite of codependent, which interestingly enough is also someone with a lack of self love...just a different coping mechanism. I'm definitely more on the codepdent side of the bar. Which most people think means you aren't independent...which is absolutely not true. You are actually usually more independent. The difference is codependents GIVE to feel important and narcissists TAKE to feel important. Ideally we should be able to love ourselves and fit somewhere in the middle of those two.
Talking about taking selfies and caring about how you look...I don't think that equals narcissistic. Maybe vain...but who isn't lol
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DasItMan91 wrote: »Everybody wants attention ESPECIALLY females. Females, no matter how ugly they are or insecure, crave it. With a hot woman.....we all know her ego is gonna be sky high.
wow. a bit too much overgeneralization here.
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TheRoadDog wrote: »Very few people do anything for a totally unselfish reason. Think about it.
Almost everything I (and others) do is for a self reward.
If you can name something you do that is totally unselfish, I'd love to hear about it.
I got a kick out of this. It reminded me of the Friends episode where Phoebe tried to show Joey there is such a thing as a selfless good deed.2
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