Do you think it's body shaming...

glassyo
glassyo Posts: 7,735 Member
If a person makes a joke that she thinks someone (who she doesn't know and has only seen pictures of) should eat a cheeseburger or two or is the person taking offense being too sensitive?

Asking for a friend. :)


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Replies

  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,735 Member
    LOL. I'm female and was actually told to eat a burrito because I ended up a little under weight and I didn't take it as body shaming!

    (OK, these people were coming at me more for health reasons but still!)
  • mechell007
    mechell007 Posts: 97 Member
    I sure as heck wouldn't tell someone to eat a salad because they need to lose weight, just as I wouldn't push a donut on someone and insist they need to gain. I trust that they know their bodies better than I. That said, shaming is in the intent, it depends on how they meant it.
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,735 Member
    glassyo wrote: »
    LOL. I'm female and was actually told to eat a burrito because I ended up a little under weight and I didn't take it as body shaming!

    (OK, these people were coming at me more for health reasons but still!)

    was it a dude that told you to eat a burrito?

    Two dudes and a dudette. My boss, his girl friend, and their neighbor (who's also a client so I see him once or twice a year).
  • Vikka_V
    Vikka_V Posts: 9,563 Member
    I've been on the thin side before and honestly comments about (me) needing to eat more or having people bring me food or specially making me food is weird, awkward and uncomfortable.

    Definitely felt shame and singled out to the point where I would wear three shirts/sweaters and two pairs of pants for awhile.

    I knew I was skinny and I felt disgusting for it.
  • tsortsor
    tsortsor Posts: 830 Member
    U look in good shape but u hide half your pic
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,735 Member
    mechell007 wrote: »
    I sure as heck wouldn't tell someone to eat a salad because they need to lose weight, just as I wouldn't push a donut on someone and insist they need to gain. I trust that they know their bodies better than I. That said, shaming is in the intent, it depends on how they meant it.

    It was just a joke. I mean, I do think she's too skinny but I'm fairly certain she'll never find out what I said since nobody who would have read the comment or taken offense even knows her. Which, I know, doesn't make it right. :)

    I just think being called out on this being body shaming was a bit too much.

    Actually, I just looked up the definition and I don't think it came anywhere close to body shaming.
  • Vikka_V
    Vikka_V Posts: 9,563 Member
    tsortsor wrote: »
    U look in good shape but u hide half your pic

    lol...some sense of anonymity - isn't that what you are going for?
  • ZodFit
    ZodFit Posts: 394 Member
    I mean, if it was flipped and people said she should lay off the burgers there would be an issue. People care about fat shaming and less about fit shaming.

  • JLAJ81
    JLAJ81 Posts: 2,477 Member
    Just a joke, don't be so sensitive
  • rheddmobile
    rheddmobile Posts: 6,840 Member
    Since it wasn't said to her face, it can't be body shaming. The most that can be said is it was a little thoughtless - many people don't realize that skinny people might also feel critical of their bodies.
  • iamunicoon
    iamunicoon Posts: 839 Member
    I think there's a general culture that's grown over the years where people have learned to be conscious of not shaming big people for their size but "we" find it totally acceptable to crack jokes about skinny people. It's even in small things like that joke you made or when people cheer for Adele cracking jokes at thinner female artists' expense because hey, she's the big girl, she deserves that.

    Personally, I don't think that's okay, no matter which way. I wouldn't get super butthurt over it, even if I was in her place and didn't even know who you are. But it's still not a nice thing to say.
  • Ironandwine69
    Ironandwine69 Posts: 2,432 Member
    Nah. It's just a joke.
    But God forbid you tell someone they don't need to eat that. Then it's Spanish Inquisition
  • LittleLionHeart1
    LittleLionHeart1 Posts: 3,655 Member
    I think it depends on who those people are. And how it is said.
  • ZodFit
    ZodFit Posts: 394 Member
    Were there any positive things said? Or was it just a roast session. Sounds like a roast session. Then again celebrity roasts all contain jokes but atleast that person is there to laugh at em.

    My guess is that the people talking about the individual eat all the burgers:)jk
  • Sera515
    Sera515 Posts: 9 Member
    It's hard to know someone's actual intent. Perhaps it was body shaming or maybe they are just concerned about your health. You really can't know unless they said it and then laughed.

    All you can do is just shake it off. Don't give anyone the satisfaction of getting to you.
  • bufnitzoiu
    bufnitzoiu Posts: 147 Member
    I think some peoaple are too sensitive...
  • BreezyPeezy5
    BreezyPeezy5 Posts: 8,059 Member
    It's a smart remark and I would take a bit of offense to it if I didn't know the person well or knew of their intentions. If I tell someone big not to eat too much, it would be rude too. Friends saying that to each other may be ok but to not know someone and say that is a bit mean.
  • relynne
    relynne Posts: 387 Member
    I wouldn't say it's body shaming necessarily, but I will never understand why people can't just mind their own business. Why does it matter to you what she looks like or what she eats or doesn't eat?
  • cease_warren2011
    cease_warren2011 Posts: 22 Member
    Body shaming can be on both sides of the spectrum. If we can get upset by someone suggesting that an overweight person, should put down a cheeseburger, then yes, telling someone to eat a cheeseburger can be just as rude. I'm not overly sensitive in general but just because im not offended by certain things doesn't mean I should assume it won't offend someone else. You never know what someone is struggling with internally so its always wise to think before you speak! Plus bulding someone up feels better than tearing someone down!
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,735 Member
    Thanks, guys. :) Best part of this thread is I'm suddenly british (a prat).

    Ok, this is the background of my question.

    A female has been linked to a singer so pics of this person have been posted and instagram accounts checked out and stuff like that. This woman was getting hate from fans of the singer and hit back by trolling them. Someone on a website got on her case about it but I said I loved how she was fighting the fans bs back. She's a diet blogger with a book out and fans were leaving bad reviews. She was wearing yoga clothes in one of the pictures of her posted. That's why I commented she should eat a cheeseburger. Her top half just looked so thin! (And I apparently have some jewish mother in me. :) )
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    bufnitzoiu wrote: »
    I think some peoaple are too sensitive...

    Post Reported !
  • bufnitzoiu
    bufnitzoiu Posts: 147 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    bufnitzoiu wrote: »
    I think some peoaple are too sensitive...

    Post Reported !

    Here's some candy!:))
  • DasItMan91
    DasItMan91 Posts: 5,753 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    bufnitzoiu wrote: »
    I think some peoaple are too sensitive...

    Post Reported !

    Oh you done it now
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  • bby_dvll
    bby_dvll Posts: 429 Member
    if it is personally attacking the persons body weight, then yes i would consider it body shaming. however if it’s put into something like “wow, you’re so skinny!” then that’s not body shaming, but rather a compliment. you see, telling someone they are skinny can be taken by the person to be cruel, but it’s really not. skinny is the body standard. but since the person had told them to gain weight because of how skinny they were then that is offensive.
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,735 Member
    Wow, I can't believe it's been 4 years since this thread.
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  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    This thread certainly damaged my inner child.

    Four years later and the pain still endures.