Do you think it's body shaming...

2

Replies

  • JessD9031
    JessD9031 Posts: 581 Member
    Seriously, if someone says something to you that makes you feel ashamed of your body, maybe there is something you need to change about yourself instead of blaming other people for making you feel ashamed. If you love yourself, it does not matter what anyone says about you, and if you loathe yourself, it does not matter what they say in that case either. Stop blaming other people for YOUR problems. Suck it up and do something about it buttercup.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    JessD9031 wrote: »
    Seriously, if someone says something to you that makes you feel ashamed of your body, maybe there is something you need to change about yourself instead of blaming other people for making you feel ashamed. If you love yourself, it does not matter what anyone says about you, and if you loathe yourself, it does not matter what they say in that case either. Stop blaming other people for YOUR problems. Suck it up and do something about it buttercup.

    Nails.

    The only exception to this is if it’s a condition that is beyond one’s control, but yeah.... self reliance is a beautiful thing.
  • tulips_and_tea
    tulips_and_tea Posts: 5,744 Member
    Funny that this thread was revived today because just 5 minutes ago I was told I need to eat a Whopper. It came from a client whom I truly like and is a good person. No offense taken by my part. I know I'm healthy and I'm comfortable with myself.

    I think I depends on the intent of the person making the comment but we can only guess what their intentions are. I choose to think they aren't always bad.
  • Peachesand_cream
    Peachesand_cream Posts: 594 Member
    bby_dvll wrote: »
    if it is personally attacking the persons body weight, then yes i would consider it body shaming. however if it’s put into something like “wow, you’re so skinny!” then that’s not body shaming, but rather a compliment. you see, telling someone they are skinny can be taken by the person to be cruel, but it’s really not. skinny is the body standard. but since the person had told them to gain weight because of how skinny they were then that is offensive.

    lc0jaln2qled.gif
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    bby_dvll wrote: »
    if it is personally attacking the persons body weight, then yes i would consider it body shaming. however if it’s put into something like “wow, you’re so skinny!” then that’s not body shaming, but rather a compliment. you see, telling someone they are skinny can be taken by the person to be cruel, but it’s really not. skinny is the body standard. but since the person had told them to gain weight because of how skinny they were then that is offensive.

    lc0jaln2qled.gif

    What's not to understand?

    She said it: "Skinny is the Body Standard."

    This was posted online, therefore it must be true.

    Everyone knows that it's illegal to post anything but the truth online.
  • Peachesand_cream
    Peachesand_cream Posts: 594 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    bby_dvll wrote: »
    if it is personally attacking the persons body weight, then yes i would consider it body shaming. however if it’s put into something like “wow, you’re so skinny!” then that’s not body shaming, but rather a compliment. you see, telling someone they are skinny can be taken by the person to be cruel, but it’s really not. skinny is the body standard. but since the person had told them to gain weight because of how skinny they were then that is offensive.

    lc0jaln2qled.gif

    What's not to understand?

    She said it: "Skinny is the Body Standard."

    This was posted online, therefore it must be true.

    Everyone knows that it's illegal to post anything but the truth online.

    Thank you for clarifying, Sir

    Now please excuse me while I bang my head up against the wall .....
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    bby_dvll wrote: »
    if it is personally attacking the persons body weight, then yes i would consider it body shaming. however if it’s put into something like “wow, you’re so skinny!” then that’s not body shaming, but rather a compliment. you see, telling someone they are skinny can be taken by the person to be cruel, but it’s really not. skinny is the body standard. but since the person had told them to gain weight because of how skinny they were then that is offensive.

    lc0jaln2qled.gif

    What's not to understand?

    She said it: "Skinny is the Body Standard."

    This was posted online, therefore it must be true.

    Everyone knows that it's illegal to post anything but the truth online.

    Thank you for clarifying, Sir

    Now please excuse me while I bang my head up against the wall .....

    It's okay.

    I understand.

    I too was once skinny.





    That lasted for about 15 to 20 minutes.

    Thankfully, 15 minutes wasn't enough time to give anyone the opportunity to shame me for it.
  • Peachesand_cream
    Peachesand_cream Posts: 594 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    bby_dvll wrote: »
    if it is personally attacking the persons body weight, then yes i would consider it body shaming. however if it’s put into something like “wow, you’re so skinny!” then that’s not body shaming, but rather a compliment. you see, telling someone they are skinny can be taken by the person to be cruel, but it’s really not. skinny is the body standard. but since the person had told them to gain weight because of how skinny they were then that is offensive.

    lc0jaln2qled.gif

    What's not to understand?

    She said it: "Skinny is the Body Standard."

    This was posted online, therefore it must be true.

    Everyone knows that it's illegal to post anything but the truth online.

    Thank you for clarifying, Sir

    Now please excuse me while I bang my head up against the wall .....

    It's okay.

    I understand.

    I too was once skinny.





    That lasted for about 15 to 20 minutes.

    Thankfully, 15 minutes wasn't enough time to give anyone the opportunity to shame me for it.

    And dis is why I ❤️ you!
  • Moveit80
    Moveit80 Posts: 57 Member
    Just humor in my opinion but I have a very diff sense of humor so can see how others take it a diff way
  • bby_dvll
    bby_dvll Posts: 429 Member
    maybe it wasn’t so good to revive a thread i didn’t know happened 4 years ago at 2 am lol, i should’ve been more clear. as someone who has been body shamed since i was 11 and seeing my closest friends be body shamed, ive seen a lot as to what is and isn’t body shaming. like i’ve said, skinny is the body standard, along with either a large *kitten* or tits. ive had friends be body shamed because they are skinny but flat, and others be body shamed because they are fat. and like someone said the intent on what someone says can be different that interpreted, but it’s not always body shaming. anyways that’s my take
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    edited June 2021
    I've been asked if I was feeling okay(such as I must have some deadly disease) to was I anorexic, due to being very skinny, all the way up to being told I shouldn't eat that ice cream cone or wow, I must really love pizza. It's all degrading, no matter which edge of the coin you're tipping at the moment.
    I see all those types of comments as unkind and thoughtless because they were all given on a very personal level. But take my opinion for what it's worth because I tend to be way too sensitive sometimes and remember negative comments for years. :/

    Same as @bby_dvll, I remember being teased/picked on/fat shamed from way back in my childhood and truly believe the negative comments made by others became somewhat of a self-fulfilling prophecy I've fought with the rest of my life.
  • wunderkindking
    wunderkindking Posts: 1,615 Member
    Oh, if you think having a large chest doesn't subject you to negative remarks and attention, you're wrong.

    there is no winning. everyone has an opinion about what a body should be and not nearly enough people have enough manners to know when to keep their mouths shut about it.
  • Derpes
    Derpes Posts: 2,033 Member
    The easiest route is just to avoid saying anyone should eat a certain way, unless you're recommending good food. Rarely do such comments lead to a positive outcome.
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,760 Member
    Derpes wrote: »
    The easiest route is just to avoid saying anyone should eat a certain way, unless you're recommending good food. Rarely do such comments lead to a positive outcome.

    Cheeseburgers are delicious. :p

    This isn't the pic that inspired the comment but it shows what I mean more. And, ugh, she's so pretty. :)

    tsm2dzl4v4yu.jpg
  • jjpptt2
    jjpptt2 Posts: 5,650 Member
    glassyo wrote: »
    Derpes wrote: »
    The easiest route is just to avoid saying anyone should eat a certain way, unless you're recommending good food. Rarely do such comments lead to a positive outcome.

    Cheeseburgers are delicious. :p

    This isn't the pic that inspired the comment but it shows what I mean more. And, ugh, she's so pretty. :)

    tsm2dzl4v4yu.jpg

    She is pretty.

    Am I allowed to say that?
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    glassyo wrote: »
    Derpes wrote: »
    The easiest route is just to avoid saying anyone should eat a certain way, unless you're recommending good food. Rarely do such comments lead to a positive outcome.

    Cheeseburgers are delicious. :p

    This isn't the pic that inspired the comment but it shows what I mean more. And, ugh, she's so pretty. :)

    tsm2dzl4v4yu.jpg

    I wonder if she has any idea of the sugar content in that glass of white wine ?


    She might really be surprised.


    Should we tell her ??
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,760 Member
    jjpptt2 wrote: »
    glassyo wrote: »
    Derpes wrote: »
    The easiest route is just to avoid saying anyone should eat a certain way, unless you're recommending good food. Rarely do such comments lead to a positive outcome.

    Cheeseburgers are delicious. :p

    This isn't the pic that inspired the comment but it shows what I mean more. And, ugh, she's so pretty. :)

    tsm2dzl4v4yu.jpg

    She is pretty.

    Am I allowed to say that?

    You're agreeing with me so...yes?
  • Peachesand_cream
    Peachesand_cream Posts: 594 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    glassyo wrote: »
    Derpes wrote: »
    The easiest route is just to avoid saying anyone should eat a certain way, unless you're recommending good food. Rarely do such comments lead to a positive outcome.

    Cheeseburgers are delicious. :p

    This isn't the pic that inspired the comment but it shows what I mean more. And, ugh, she's so pretty. :)

    tsm2dzl4v4yu.jpg

    I wonder if she has any idea of the sugar content in that glass of white wine ?


    She might really be surprised.


    Should we tell her ??

    Great...you had to bring race into this 🙄
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,760 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    glassyo wrote: »
    Derpes wrote: »
    The easiest route is just to avoid saying anyone should eat a certain way, unless you're recommending good food. Rarely do such comments lead to a positive outcome.

    Cheeseburgers are delicious. :p

    This isn't the pic that inspired the comment but it shows what I mean more. And, ugh, she's so pretty. :)

    tsm2dzl4v4yu.jpg

    I wonder if she has any idea of the sugar content in that glass of white wine ?


    She might really be surprised.


    Should we tell her ??

    You made me almost spit out my cookie! Er...not because it has sugar. :)
  • GymGoddessGoals
    GymGoddessGoals Posts: 2,146 Member
    If you have to ask if your statement was shaming or negative, then you probably shouldnt have said it. Reminds me of the "AITA" threads on reddit. "Skinny" being a body standard is bullocks. Calling and/or referencing someone as skinny is just as derogatory as calling someone fat. Telling someone they need to eat a cheeseburger and/or sandwich because of their body shape/weight is very unkind.
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    edited June 2021
    Calling and/or referencing someone as skinny is just as derogatory as calling someone fat.

    I can see where it would be but from my viewpoint I always wanted to be called skinny instead of chubby, fatso, etc., etc. I guess it depends on our own individual perspective based on our experiences. :(

  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,760 Member
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    Calling and/or referencing someone as skinny is just as derogatory as calling someone fat.

    I can see where it would be but from my viewpoint I always wanted to be called skinny instead of chubby, fatso, etc., etc. I guess it depends on our own individual perspective based on our experiences. :(

    Exactly. I doubt the woman in question ever had a weight problem but I'm a little weird and took it as a compliment when a nurse client asked if I'd been sick. :)

    And I wouldn't consciously body shame anyone anyway. Because being told you have banana boobs by stupid neighbor boys when you're like 10 REALLY *kitten* you up.
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,760 Member
    I'm getting flashbacks to the should the person compliment an acquaintance at the gym thread. :)
  • Peachesand_cream
    Peachesand_cream Posts: 594 Member
    ReenieHJ wrote: »
    Calling and/or referencing someone as skinny is just as derogatory as calling someone fat.

    I can see where it would be but from my viewpoint I always wanted to be called skinny instead of chubby, fatso, etc., etc. I guess it depends on our own individual perspective based on our experiences. :(

    So by that logic, a "skinny" person doesnt get to be offended by judgemental/labeling comments because ....why?

    Im of a petite athletic build. I havent always been. Ive been on the underweight and overweight sides both. I cringe when someone calls me skinny. Skinny has never been a polite thing to say. However it seems to be more acceptable than to call someone fat. WTF has the right to judge my body this way?

    Amen!
  • Mellouk89
    Mellouk89 Posts: 469 Member
    It depends who's on the receiving end. At one time I was 245lbs, eating large amounts of food to gain strength in the gym. Everyday people were telling me I should cut, to see the "fruits of my training" so to speak. People were regularly passing comments on my physique, often times mocking me because I looked really bloated.

    But I think intent is what matters, and I didn't take offense because it was done in a light hearted way.

    That was more than a decade ago, we're in different times now.

  • wunderkindking
    wunderkindking Posts: 1,615 Member
    I don't personally get offended that often but honestly it's really not appropriate to be commenting on a stranger's body, period. Or even casual friend. Someone you've got a close friendly relationship with, okay, if they like that but honestly wtf. Compliment their sweater or their smile or something.