Difference 90lbs makes. Pic heavy.

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Height- 5'3 1/2

SW- 253

CW- 165ish

Starting size- 22 / XXL

Current- 10/12 / M-XL

Everyone has a story. This is mine. Lots of pics down below. : o )

I remember putting myself on my first diet in the second grade. I was a little bigger than my friends, but looking back at during my childhood I wasn't obese or overweight, just average. For some reason I have always been obsessed with my weight, even when I shouldn't have been. As I grew older I grew bigger and bigger. Getting into high school I slowly made my way into the 200lbs category. And when I graduated and started school for massage therapy, I only got bigger. And there may have been things that happened that could be the underlying reason why I turned food for comfort, but realistically I have to take responsibility. It was my own fault. I barely participated in any sort physical activity, I hated it, I hated how I felt like everyone would be looking at me. I loved food (still do) and would eat until I was stuffed full, all the time. I would constantly be eating junk food and eating out and drinking pop and smoking cigarettes. I was so unhappy with my life, deep in a dark depression. I completely hated who I was as a person and the way I looked, but that's all I knew. Since I was a kid. But I never did anything about it. I didn't know how.

Almost everyone makes the same New Years goal, to lose weight. On New Year's Day 2011, I took a step on the scale and 253 was the number. To be honest, I could have been bigger before that, I have no idea. And I don't remember feeling shocked by that number either, I knew how big I was. Funny thing is though, I somehow tricked myself for so long into believing I didn't look that big. For some reason, I was ready to begin a new chapter in my life.

I started counting calories on myfitnesspal and started with walking. I spent so many hours researching, cause I had no idea how to be healthy, I was starting from square one. I bought a heart rate monitor and I would say that has been one of the best purchases I have made. That thing is my baby. I started the 30 day Shred, loved that. After a few months, I was brave enough to start at the gym, walking on the treadmill and doing the elliptical. During this time I also broke up with my long term boyfriend of 4 1/2 years. My life completely changed slowly but surely. I was becoming happy, enjoying life, and the people in it. The first time someone called me a social butterfly I about died. I had always been the shy, quiet girl.

I started Couch to 5K about a year and a half after I started living an active lifestyle. And I am in love with running(for the most part). I've participated in two 5k's so far and would love to do more. A few months ago I started really getting into yoga, which I am in love with too. Currently I try to run about 2-2.5 miles 4 times out of the week and practice yoga at least 5 days out of the week. I'm still trying to get into biking, which I really hated at first, but I'm starting to like it. Just need to get a seat that doesn't hurt my *kitten* so much!

For me, changing up my workout routines every few months has seemed to help me. It keeps things interesting and I find out so much about what I do and don't like. At first I tried to set goals for myself, but I've learned I'm not a goal setter, planner, or anything like that. It almost discourages me. So I go with the flow and take it with ease. My initial goal was to lose 100 lbs (though I never thought I could even lose 20!! I have really surprised myself throughout this whole experience) and my progress has been slower than some others. It took me 2 years to lose about 90 lbs, and for the past 7 months I've been stuck at the same weight. But I try not to let that get to me because I feel like I have gotten better physically and have improved my health. I've also slowly started changing the way I eat. At first I just watched calories and didn't care where they came from, now I'm adding in more fruits and veggies, because I WANT to, not because I feel like I have to. I actually crave healthy food now. And I rarely drink pop anymore, thanks to water enhancers!

I try not to look at working out and exercising as something negative or something that I don't want to do. I look at it as an active lifestyle. That's all it took for me to lose weight, no diet pills, no crazy diets ( I still eat whatever I want, but I try to limit portions, and how often) no starving. It's taking a lot of patience. It's amazing how this lifestyle improves your mental health, physical health, social life, your skin, your outlook on life, everything really. I have changed so much in the past couple years not only on the outside, but as well as the inside. I'm a happy person now. And I'm much nicer. I'm in love with life for the first time. It's actually weird to think about how I was before.

The hardest part about all this is trying to deal with the way I look. A lot of the time I still feel like I look like I'm 253. I'm still incredibly insecure with how I look. But that is something I'm trying to improve. Sometimes I only see how much farther I have to go. It's a strange concept on how people treat you differently with the way you look. It's like a secret world. I live in a small town so almost every day I constantly get comments from others on my weight loss, which sometimes makes me a little uncomfortable, but it also keeps me going. I feel like I was meant to live the first half of my life that way, maybe I appreciate things more this way. I also think it keeps me humble. I think I'll always be a fat girl on the inside, and I like that.

As for the future, I just want to keep improving who I am as a person on the inside and out. I'm still trying to figure out what I want to do with my life (although I'm beginning to think I will never actually know), but I think someday I may want to work in the healthy industry, helping people help themselves in a natural, healthy, positive way. I hope I can still lose some more weight, but I'm trying to not worry about a time frame. I want to focus on improving my health above anything.

Sorry that got long!! I remember reading through success stories and never thought I'd be here. Although everyone is different and so many things work for different people, if anyone has questions or advice on how I did it, don't hesitate to ask. I've been a lingerer around here for a LOOOOONG time. Thanks! : o )

AND for the many pics.

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Work out clothes. First one taken on Jan 1 2011 second a week ago.

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New Years Eve 2010 Vs. New Years Eve 2012

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Vacation, same spot, two years apart.

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Purple shirts

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Senior Pictures Vs. Friends 22nd birthday

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Face Comparison

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I hope by posting this I am helping others get/stay motivated. We can do this!!
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