Bullies
Replies
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Thank you to those sharing their stories. I think we all know that bullying causes so much damage and the affects are painful even many years later.0
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I was bullied my entire time of school because I was a fat kid until I got to college. So I understand how he is feeling or how any kid who is bullied from the time they get on the bus until the time they get home.Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Again, this is a kid.
Who can't control his family situation or the actions of his mother. Anyone with eyes can see that the pain he felt in that video is real. I pray that all this attention and controversy surrounding him doesn't affect him even more.
But if its true that he was using racist words, I can't defend his *kitten* whompin'
Also, it is extremely weird that his mother pulls out her phone (camera) to film it. I wouldn't do that to my kid.....I wouldn't want him to ever relive it by my hands.
Yeah I don't condone any use of racial slurs no matter the situation. As far as the mom filming him, well parents do stupid *kitten* sometimes. Personally I don't like plastering my kids out there for attention but it happens a lot. It's sad that virtually everyone has seen his pain.0 -
Well it sounds like you are a very smart parent and I agree.Avocado_AS5 wrote: »
I was bullied my entire time of school because I was a fat kid until I got to college. So I understand how he is feeling or how any kid who is bullied from the time they get on the bus until the time they get home.Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Again, this is a kid.
Who can't control his family situation or the actions of his mother. Anyone with eyes can see that the pain he felt in that video is real. I pray that all this attention and controversy surrounding him doesn't affect him even more.
But if its true that he was using racist words, I can't defend his *kitten* whompin'
Also, it is extremely weird that his mother pulls out her phone (camera) to film it. I wouldn't do that to my kid.....I wouldn't want him to ever relive it by my hands.
Yeah I don't condone any use of racial slurs no matter the situation. As far as the mom filming him, well parents do stupid *kitten* sometimes. Personally I don't like plastering my kids out there for attention but it happens a lot. It's sad that virtually everyone has seen his pain.
I don't tolerate bullying ever. I have seen my son get bullied and it ends quick. I don't care to get involved personally. I don't like violence but I will confront any situation I have to, to protect my son.
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I was bullied my entire time of school because I was a fat kid until I got to college. So I understand how he is feeling or how any kid who is bullied from the time they get on the bus until the time they get home.Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Again, this is a kid.
Who can't control his family situation or the actions of his mother. Anyone with eyes can see that the pain he felt in that video is real. I pray that all this attention and controversy surrounding him doesn't affect him even more.
But if its true that he was using racist words, I can't defend his *kitten* whompin'
Also, it is extremely weird that his mother pulls out her phone (camera) to film it. I wouldn't do that to my kid.....I wouldn't want him to ever relive it by my hands.
As a kid isn't he a product of his parents and upbringing? I'm not excusing his use of racist words, if he has used them, but if he's brought up around people who have racist views, he probably would think it a normal way of talking.
I think there are lessons to be learnt on both sides.1 -
Parents of kids at some age have to be responsible but they should not be completely blamed as the kids get older so age does factor in. I think ALL parents need to be aware of the problematic behaviors of their child. Most schools in my little area have meetings with teachers/benchmark things of such and field trips etc that I can attend and know what is going on. That's how I noticed a kid was picking on my son and it ended as soon as I saw it. I teach my kid if he ever picks or hurts another kid he won't like the consequences but he will have to learn from his own mistakes as well.
I was bullied my entire time of school because I was a fat kid until I got to college. So I understand how he is feeling or how any kid who is bullied from the time they get on the bus until the time they get home.Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Again, this is a kid.
Who can't control his family situation or the actions of his mother. Anyone with eyes can see that the pain he felt in that video is real. I pray that all this attention and controversy surrounding him doesn't affect him even more.
But if its true that he was using racist words, I can't defend his *kitten* whompin'
Also, it is extremely weird that his mother pulls out her phone (camera) to film it. I wouldn't do that to my kid.....I wouldn't want him to ever relive it by my hands.
As a kid isn't he a product of his parents and upbringing? I'm not excusing his use of racist words, if he has used them, but if he's brought up around people who have racist views, he probably would think it a normal way of talking.
I think there are lessons to be learnt on both sides.
I never bullied other kids but was just the kid being bullied. Sadly it happens to often and most parents are unaware or just don't care.
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MaxFactorMFP wrote: »@newmeadow wrote: »I'm still glad she got $56,000 from her GoFundMe. She can take it and send him to a private school with an absolute zero tolerance policy towards bullying and get him out of that gross public school where anything goes. If that's what she ends up doing with the cash, I wouldn't consider it exploitation. Her political views are of no consequence to anyone who was moved by the video and wants to help the kid out. And anyone who's offended by her opinions is free not to donate or help out. Somebody obviously went digging into old facebook posts of hers with the intent to discredit her and turn the tides of public sympathy against her.
Sorry to say but private schools are just as bad. Many private schools are full of kids kicked out of the public schools.
And, IMO, people are abusing GoFundMe.
I see GoFundMe accounts everyday on facebook, it's crazy.0 -
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I went to Christian school most of my childhood, except for 1 year of homeschooling and the bullying was horrible. It’s not just public schools.
It wasn’t until my senior year that I got the guts to actually stand up for myself.2 -
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Parents of kids at some age have to be responsible but they should not be completely blamed as the kids get older so age does factor in. I think ALL parents need to be aware of the problematic behaviors of their child. Most schools in my little area have meetings with teachers/benchmark things of such and field trips etc that I can attend and know what is going on. That's how I noticed a kid was picking on my son and it ended as soon as I saw it. I teach my kid if he ever picks or hurts another kid he won't like the consequences but he will have to learn from his own mistakes as well.
I was bullied my entire time of school because I was a fat kid until I got to college. So I understand how he is feeling or how any kid who is bullied from the time they get on the bus until the time they get home.Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Again, this is a kid.
Who can't control his family situation or the actions of his mother. Anyone with eyes can see that the pain he felt in that video is real. I pray that all this attention and controversy surrounding him doesn't affect him even more.
But if its true that he was using racist words, I can't defend his *kitten* whompin'
Also, it is extremely weird that his mother pulls out her phone (camera) to film it. I wouldn't do that to my kid.....I wouldn't want him to ever relive it by my hands.
As a kid isn't he a product of his parents and upbringing? I'm not excusing his use of racist words, if he has used them, but if he's brought up around people who have racist views, he probably would think it a normal way of talking.
I think there are lessons to be learnt on both sides.
I never bullied other kids but was just the kid being bullied. Sadly it happens to often and most parents are unaware or just don't care.
True but if reports are to believed, you're clearly not a similar parent to the child's mum. If she's a racist, and I haven't looked into it, she's clearly not encouraging her kid to take any responsibility. He may well have to find out the hard way.
We used to have parent evenings as kids but I'm not sure how much interaction with teachers there was outside of that. Maybe that's a new thing.0 -
I tend to look into anything before I make comments in regards. She doesn't look too good right now. I saw the video before I read any information and I don't like seeing anything like this........but something is fishy apparently.
Parents of kids at some age have to be responsible but they should not be completely blamed as the kids get older so age does factor in. I think ALL parents need to be aware of the problematic behaviors of their child. Most schools in my little area have meetings with teachers/benchmark things of such and field trips etc that I can attend and know what is going on. That's how I noticed a kid was picking on my son and it ended as soon as I saw it. I teach my kid if he ever picks or hurts another kid he won't like the consequences but he will have to learn from his own mistakes as well.
I was bullied my entire time of school because I was a fat kid until I got to college. So I understand how he is feeling or how any kid who is bullied from the time they get on the bus until the time they get home.Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Again, this is a kid.
Who can't control his family situation or the actions of his mother. Anyone with eyes can see that the pain he felt in that video is real. I pray that all this attention and controversy surrounding him doesn't affect him even more.
But if its true that he was using racist words, I can't defend his *kitten* whompin'
Also, it is extremely weird that his mother pulls out her phone (camera) to film it. I wouldn't do that to my kid.....I wouldn't want him to ever relive it by my hands.
As a kid isn't he a product of his parents and upbringing? I'm not excusing his use of racist words, if he has used them, but if he's brought up around people who have racist views, he probably would think it a normal way of talking.
I think there are lessons to be learnt on both sides.
I never bullied other kids but was just the kid being bullied. Sadly it happens to often and most parents are unaware or just don't care.
True but if reports are to believed, you're clearly not a similar parent to the child's mum. If she's a racist, and I haven't looked into it, she's clearly not encouraging her kid to take any responsibility. He may well have to find out the hard way.
We used to have parent evenings as kids but I'm not sure how much interaction with teachers there was outside of that. Maybe that's a new thing.
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I tend to look into anything before I make comments in regards. She doesn't look too good right now. I saw the video before I read any information and I don't like seeing anything like this........but something is fishy apparently.
Parents of kids at some age have to be responsible but they should not be completely blamed as the kids get older so age does factor in. I think ALL parents need to be aware of the problematic behaviors of their child. Most schools in my little area have meetings with teachers/benchmark things of such and field trips etc that I can attend and know what is going on. That's how I noticed a kid was picking on my son and it ended as soon as I saw it. I teach my kid if he ever picks or hurts another kid he won't like the consequences but he will have to learn from his own mistakes as well.
I was bullied my entire time of school because I was a fat kid until I got to college. So I understand how he is feeling or how any kid who is bullied from the time they get on the bus until the time they get home.Avocado_AS5 wrote: »Again, this is a kid.
Who can't control his family situation or the actions of his mother. Anyone with eyes can see that the pain he felt in that video is real. I pray that all this attention and controversy surrounding him doesn't affect him even more.
But if its true that he was using racist words, I can't defend his *kitten* whompin'
Also, it is extremely weird that his mother pulls out her phone (camera) to film it. I wouldn't do that to my kid.....I wouldn't want him to ever relive it by my hands.
As a kid isn't he a product of his parents and upbringing? I'm not excusing his use of racist words, if he has used them, but if he's brought up around people who have racist views, he probably would think it a normal way of talking.
I think there are lessons to be learnt on both sides.
I never bullied other kids but was just the kid being bullied. Sadly it happens to often and most parents are unaware or just don't care.
True but if reports are to believed, you're clearly not a similar parent to the child's mum. If she's a racist, and I haven't looked into it, she's clearly not encouraging her kid to take any responsibility. He may well have to find out the hard way.
We used to have parent evenings as kids but I'm not sure how much interaction with teachers there was outside of that. Maybe that's a new thing.
I wonder if Chris Evans will end up withdrawing his offer of the Avengers Premiere.0 -
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MaxFactorMFP wrote: »@newmeadow wrote: »I'm still glad she got $56,000 from her GoFundMe. She can take it and send him to a private school with an absolute zero tolerance policy towards bullying and get him out of that gross public school where anything goes. If that's what she ends up doing with the cash, I wouldn't consider it exploitation. Her political views are of no consequence to anyone who was moved by the video and wants to help the kid out. And anyone who's offended by her opinions is free not to donate or help out. Somebody obviously went digging into old facebook posts of hers with the intent to discredit her and turn the tides of public sympathy against her.
Sorry to say but private schools are just as bad. Many private schools are full of kids kicked out of the public schools.
And, IMO, people are abusing GoFundMe.
The more I'm reading on this thread leads me back to my original belief that home schooling is the best way, even though it's not an option for most families which is a bummer.
Yeah, GoFundMe is full of all types and I'm sure there are plenty of scammers there. I suppose one would have to do their own independent research of whoever's asking for money to determine whether they should contribute.
Still, private schools can kick out any student they want, right? Wouldn't they kick out bullies? Maybe I'm naïve about schooly stuff, as I don't have children of my own and I went to public school except for one year of private. But isn't that the whole point of making a school private? The school plays by its own rulebook and isn't at the beck and call of politically correct government regulations and rules because they aren't funded by federal or state money?
Home schooled kids get bullied too. I had a friend growing up who was home schooled...he obviously wasn't bullied at home, but he was kinda the "odd ball" kid in clubs and other activities he did to get that social aspect of his education. He was the weirdo because he was home schooled.
I never really had any issues in private school until middle school...I might not have had them had we not moved from Nebraska to New Mexico in 6th grade because in my other school in Nebraska I had grown up with all of those other kids...moving to New Mexico, I was new blood and fresh meat...not to mention, the vast cultural difference between being a corn fed white boy in Nebraska vs living in NM...add to that, my parents, while not impoverished, were definitely lower middle class and most people attending the school were from fairly well off backgrounds. Income disparity will always get your *kitten* kicked.
A private school can kick people out...but they would also have to know what's going on. I didn't really report the bullying because I was scared to. It all came out one day when I just had enough and we were in the locker room after gym class and here came my bully to do his thing...when he got close enough I swung my locker open as hard as I could and planted it into his face. That pretty much lead to a lot of things coming out in regards to what was going on...he wasn't expelled, but he was suspended and so was I. It was worth it though, because he never bullied me again and from that point on I realized I had the right and obligation to stand up for myself.
At that same school, when I was in 7th grade, a female student was expelled because she was molesting another female student in the locker room when people weren't around and touching her breasts and private area and forcing her to do the same...this apparently had been going on for a couple of months before it came out.
My parents had to put me in public school in 8th grade for financial reasons and I went to public school from 8th grade to high school graduation without issue. I flourished in athletics, namely track and football and really had a pretty good time.
My girlfriend my Junior year went to one of the best private schools in the city...most of these kids go on to elite universities and such...I couldn't believe the debauchery that went on at that school...the drugs were insane, and I'm not talking about taking a puff of weed at a party...these kids were wealthy and doing cocaine and whatnot.
Point is, crazy *kitten* goes on everywhere...it would be nice if we could shelter our kids from all of it by moving them to what would seem to be a safer space...but crazy *kitten* is everywhere...0 -
One of the things I learned in diversity training is that it's not whether or not you are trying to be mean or hurt someone's feelings, but rather whether or not your words and actions are perceived by the other person to be hurtful to them... It's about perception. Same as discrimination. If it can reasonably be contrived as being mean, hurtful or discriminatory, then it is. Pure and simple. So, the guy who says something like, "I was only kidding..." after he says something hurtful (in other words making it about you and not what he said -- that's bullying).
It requires each of us to develop some emotional intelligence and to work with our children so that they can both develop empathy and the courage to stand up for others unable to stand up for themselves. Not keeping a shameful silence (complicity) has been in the news a lot lately. If one child in that lunch room had stood with him, others might have too.
All too often teachers don't pay attention to what happens in the lunchroom or on the playground. I went through something similar with my own daughter and went to the school and met with the teachers and they helped by doing several things. Kids began to have randomly assigned seating both in their class room as well as in the lunch room and it changed every few weeks. This gave kids an opportunity to get to know kids not in their cliques and that helped a lot.
There are many trolls and bullies on MFP. There is one who has like 2,500 posts to his / her credit. I mean, really? Who has that kind of time. I kind of feel sorry for that person. And I wish we had a voting button to get people's posts removed... and that after a certain number they get booted. I pay to belong to MFP and I have met some wonderful people here. But it only takes one dump in the pool to spoil it for everyone else, I guess.2 -
That's a lot of words.0
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There are many trolls and bullies on MFP. There is one who has like 2,500 posts to his / her credit. I mean, really? Who has that kind of time. I kind of feel sorry for that person. And I wish we had a voting button to get people's posts removed... and that after a certain number they get booted. I pay to belong to MFP and I have met some wonderful people here. But it only takes one dump in the pool to spoil it for everyone else, I guess.
I've seen many trolls but I have a tough time understanding what people call bullies on this site. It's pretty easy to block or ignore someone who's trying to come for you. Even easier to tell them to Eff off. People will treat you the way you allow them to treat you.
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It's all perception. I have many people who don't like me......I don't think they are bullies. It's a defense mechanism for their own insecurities and I just play a part in that somehow. =/Just_J_Now wrote: »
There are many trolls and bullies on MFP. There is one who has like 2,500 posts to his / her credit. I mean, really? Who has that kind of time. I kind of feel sorry for that person. And I wish we had a voting button to get people's posts removed... and that after a certain number they get booted. I pay to belong to MFP and I have met some wonderful people here. But it only takes one dump in the pool to spoil it for everyone else, I guess.
I've seen many trolls but I have a tough time understanding what people call bullies on this site. It's pretty easy to block or ignore someone who's trying to come for you. Even easier to tell them to Eff off. People will treat you the way you allow them to treat you.
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Just_J_Now wrote: »
There are many trolls and bullies on MFP. There is one who has like 2,500 posts to his / her credit. I mean, really? Who has that kind of time. I kind of feel sorry for that person. And I wish we had a voting button to get people's posts removed... and that after a certain number they get booted. I pay to belong to MFP and I have met some wonderful people here. But it only takes one dump in the pool to spoil it for everyone else, I guess.
I've seen many trolls but I have a tough time understanding what people call bullies on this site. It's pretty easy to block or ignore someone who's trying to come for you. Even easier to tell them to Eff off. People will treat you the way you allow them to treat you.
Yeah, I've seen a lot of trolls...I really haven't seen what I would constitute bullying. I think a lot of people misconstrue disagreement or being corrected on facts as bullying and that's simply not true. There are a lot of people who are sarcastic...and a lot of people who are direct...but again, that's not bullying. Debating in the debate forums isn't bullying either...arguing/debating isn't bullying.
Also, I don't know what post counts have to do with anything...I have over 31K...I've been here for over 5 years...6 -
cwolfman13 wrote: »Just_J_Now wrote: »
There are many trolls and bullies on MFP. There is one who has like 2,500 posts to his / her credit. I mean, really? Who has that kind of time. I kind of feel sorry for that person. And I wish we had a voting button to get people's posts removed... and that after a certain number they get booted. I pay to belong to MFP and I have met some wonderful people here. But it only takes one dump in the pool to spoil it for everyone else, I guess.
I've seen many trolls but I have a tough time understanding what people call bullies on this site. It's pretty easy to block or ignore someone who's trying to come for you. Even easier to tell them to Eff off. People will treat you the way you allow them to treat you.
Yeah, I've seen a lot of trolls...I really haven't seen what I would constitute bullying. I think a lot of people misconstrue disagreement or being corrected on facts as bullying and that's simply not true. There are a lot of people who are sarcastic...and a lot of people who are direct...but again, that's not bullying. Debating in the debate forums isn't bullying either...arguing/debating isn't bullying.
Also, I don't know what post counts have to do with anything...I have over 31K...I've been here for over 5 years...
Completely agree.1 -
my kids went to public school, they were the minority in their elementary school, my middle child was being bullied by some kid. I told my son to stand up for himself and if he had to, he had my permission to kick his butt. I should my son a few moves and how to throw a proper punch.
Now my son never fought the kid, but the self confidence it gave my son, the empowerment that he would not get in trouble with his parents for defending himself, he stood up for himself and told the kid, My dad says it is ok to kick you butt, the kid backed down, later on in high school they became good friends.
The kid had problems at home which translated to school and this is usually the case, I fully believe in standing up for yourself and empowerment.
I also coached my Daughters soccer team for 15 years and I taught those girls that you always stand up for yourself and each other, you never back down, never be intimidated those who are bullies are the weak ones, to put others dawn to make yourself feel better is a sign of weakness.
Always stand up, never back down, you will never walk alone.1
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