Today I Messed Up by....

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124

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  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
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    empresssue wrote: »
    @cee134, when did this become TIFU vs. TIMU?????

    ETA: I do prefer TIFU, but I have a potty mouth :smirk:

    Either works. The title had to be TIMU though.
  • empresssue
    empresssue Posts: 2,977 Member
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    Timu by listening to an idjit

    A doggone idjet galoot, to be exact.
  • WhisperingNighthawk
    WhisperingNighthawk Posts: 138 Member
    edited March 2018
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    Timu by posting about the woo.
    I didn't know, cause I'm kinda new.
    I sure learned it's a contentious issue.
    You can use on me but I won't use it on you.

    But it's still mean to use it on someone's selfie!
  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
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    Example:

    TIFU by convincing my brother's friend I killed him

    TL;DR played with fake blood, got handcuffed at gunpoint

    This happened years and years ago when I was about 15.

    It was around Halloween and we still had a bunch of fake blood and didn't know what to do with it.

    My younger brother wanted to prank his friend. So we came up with a plan where while his friend would be sitting in the kitchen I'd come in and tell my brother I wanted to show him something in the basement and take him downstairs.

    I then ran a bunch of my dad's power tools while my brother screamed bloody murder and saying "please don't kill me" but then went silent after running the saw for a few minutes. I then came up the stairs with my white undershirt covered in fake blood laughing.

    The plan was for my brother to then come up the stairs and pretend like he was a half dead zombie, but his friend took one look at me covered in blood and ran from the house screaming before my brother could come upstairs.

    Within about 5 minutes, police cars just kept coming from all directions and they came running out with guns drawn.

    The cops got confused and were looking for a dead kid, and put both me AND my brother in handcuffs not understanding he was the "victim" and wouldn't listen to our explanations and just kept screaming at us with guns drawn.

    Eventually the whole thing was sorted out with no charges filed against anyone but we were never allowed in our dad's workshop again for like 5 years.

  • marissafit06
    marissafit06 Posts: 1,996 Member
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    cee134 wrote: »
    Example:

    TIFU by convincing my brother's friend I killed him

    TL;DR played with fake blood, got handcuffed at gunpoint

    This happened years and years ago when I was about 15.

    It was around Halloween and we still had a bunch of fake blood and didn't know what to do with it.

    My younger brother wanted to prank his friend. So we came up with a plan where while his friend would be sitting in the kitchen I'd come in and tell my brother I wanted to show him something in the basement and take him downstairs.

    I then ran a bunch of my dad's power tools while my brother screamed bloody murder and saying "please don't kill me" but then went silent after running the saw for a few minutes. I then came up the stairs with my white undershirt covered in fake blood laughing.

    The plan was for my brother to then come up the stairs and pretend like he was a half dead zombie, but his friend took one look at me covered in blood and ran from the house screaming before my brother could come upstairs.

    Within about 5 minutes, police cars just kept coming from all directions and they came running out with guns drawn.

    The cops got confused and were looking for a dead kid, and put both me AND my brother in handcuffs not understanding he was the "victim" and wouldn't listen to our explanations and just kept screaming at us with guns drawn.

    Eventually the whole thing was sorted out with no charges filed against anyone but we were never allowed in our dad's workshop again for like 5 years.

    Are you a writer or something else creative?
  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
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    cee134 wrote: »
    Example:

    TIFU by convincing my brother's friend I killed him

    TL;DR played with fake blood, got handcuffed at gunpoint

    This happened years and years ago when I was about 15.

    It was around Halloween and we still had a bunch of fake blood and didn't know what to do with it.

    My younger brother wanted to prank his friend. So we came up with a plan where while his friend would be sitting in the kitchen I'd come in and tell my brother I wanted to show him something in the basement and take him downstairs.

    I then ran a bunch of my dad's power tools while my brother screamed bloody murder and saying "please don't kill me" but then went silent after running the saw for a few minutes. I then came up the stairs with my white undershirt covered in fake blood laughing.

    The plan was for my brother to then come up the stairs and pretend like he was a half dead zombie, but his friend took one look at me covered in blood and ran from the house screaming before my brother could come upstairs.

    Within about 5 minutes, police cars just kept coming from all directions and they came running out with guns drawn.

    The cops got confused and were looking for a dead kid, and put both me AND my brother in handcuffs not understanding he was the "victim" and wouldn't listen to our explanations and just kept screaming at us with guns drawn.

    Eventually the whole thing was sorted out with no charges filed against anyone but we were never allowed in our dad's workshop again for like 5 years.

    Are you a writer or something else creative?

    No, that's from the internet.
  • 4legsRbetterthan2
    4legsRbetterthan2 Posts: 19,590 MFP Moderator
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    Timu by posting about the woo.
    I didn't know, cause I'm kinda new.
    I sure learned it's a contentious issue.
    You can use on me but I won't use it on you.

    But it's still mean to use it on someone's selfie!

    Wait! This needs to go in the vague poetry thread!

  • marissafit06
    marissafit06 Posts: 1,996 Member
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    cee134 wrote: »
    cee134 wrote: »
    Example:

    TIFU by convincing my brother's friend I killed him

    TL;DR played with fake blood, got handcuffed at gunpoint

    This happened years and years ago when I was about 15.

    It was around Halloween and we still had a bunch of fake blood and didn't know what to do with it.

    My younger brother wanted to prank his friend. So we came up with a plan where while his friend would be sitting in the kitchen I'd come in and tell my brother I wanted to show him something in the basement and take him downstairs.

    I then ran a bunch of my dad's power tools while my brother screamed bloody murder and saying "please don't kill me" but then went silent after running the saw for a few minutes. I then came up the stairs with my white undershirt covered in fake blood laughing.

    The plan was for my brother to then come up the stairs and pretend like he was a half dead zombie, but his friend took one look at me covered in blood and ran from the house screaming before my brother could come upstairs.

    Within about 5 minutes, police cars just kept coming from all directions and they came running out with guns drawn.

    The cops got confused and were looking for a dead kid, and put both me AND my brother in handcuffs not understanding he was the "victim" and wouldn't listen to our explanations and just kept screaming at us with guns drawn.

    Eventually the whole thing was sorted out with no charges filed against anyone but we were never allowed in our dad's workshop again for like 5 years.

    Are you a writer or something else creative?

    No, that's from the internet.

    :disappointed:
  • 123tacos
    123tacos Posts: 661 Member
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    Allowing germs to land on me
  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
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    Example:

    TIFU by enraging the parents of my girlfriend by pretending not to know what a potato is.

    TL;DR - guy pretending not to know what a potato was had it backfire on his face. I'll tell you how.

    Let me tell you that I have made a bad mistake this evening.

    My girlfriend (who let me tell you is only my 2nd girlfriend of all time) said I am "invited to dinner" with her and her parents. I was very aghast, nervous, and bashful to be invited to such a situation. But I knew it must be done.

    I met them nicely, I should tell you, and it started off in a good way. The idea slapped my mind that I should do a comic bit, to make a good impression and become known to them as a person who is amusing.

    When I saw that baked potatoes were served I got the idea that it would be very good if I pretended I did not know what potatoes was. That would be funny.

    Well let me tell you: backfired on my face. I'll tell you how.

    So first when the potato became on my plate, I acted very interesting. I showed an expression on my face so as to seem that I was confused, astounded but in a restrained way, curious, and interested. They did notice, and seemed confused, but did not remark. So I asked "This looks very interesting. What is this?"

    They stared at me and the mother said "It's a baked potato." And I was saying "Oh, interesting, a baked....what is it again?"

    And she was like "A potato."

    And I was like "A 'potato', oh interesting. Never heard of a potato, looks pretty good."

    And then they didn't see I was clowning, but thought I really did not know what is a potato. So I knew I would be very shamed, humiliated, depressed, and disgusted if I admitted to making a bad joke, so what I did was to act as if it was not a joke but I committed to the act of pretending I didn't know what a potato is.

    They asked me, VERY incredulous, did I really not know what a potato is? That I never heard of a potato. I went with it and told them, yes, I did not ever even hear of a potato. Not only had I never eaten a potato I had never heard the word potato.

    This went on for a bit and my girlfriend was acting very confused and embarrassed by my "*kitten* up antics", and then the more insistent I was about not knowing what a potato is was when them parents starting thinking I DID know what a potato was.

    Well let me tell you I had to commit 100% at this point. When I would not admit to knowing what a potato was, the father especially began to get annoyed. At one point he said something like "Enough is enough. You're *kitten* with us. Admit it." And I said "Sir, before today I never heard of a potato. I still don't know what a potato is, other than some kind of food. I don't know what to tell you."

    Well let me tell you he got very annoyed. I decided to take a bite of the potato, and when I did I made a high pitched noise and said "Taste's very strange!"

    That is when the father started yelling at me, and the mother kept saying "What are you doing?" and my girlfriend went to some other room.

    Finally the father said I should "Get the *kitten* out of his house" and I said it was irrational to treat me like this just because I never heard of a potato before. Well let me tell you he didn't take that kindly.

    Now in text messages I have been telling my girlfriend I really don't know what a potato is. The only way I can ever get out of this is for them to buy that I don't know what a potato is.

    I wish I never started it but I can't go back. I think she will break up with me anyway.
  • 81Katz
    81Katz Posts: 7,074 Member
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    Giving someone the benefit if the doubt. Nope, still a self obsessed a-hole.
  • kam26001
    kam26001 Posts: 2,799 Member
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    TIMU by eating 2 hamburgers on a Lent Friday.
  • 123tacos
    123tacos Posts: 661 Member
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    cee134 wrote: »
    Example:

    TIFU by enraging the parents of my girlfriend by pretending not to know what a potato is.

    TL;DR - guy pretending not to know what a potato was had it backfire on his face. I'll tell you how.

    Let me tell you that I have made a bad mistake this evening.

    My girlfriend (who let me tell you is only my 2nd girlfriend of all time) said I am "invited to dinner" with her and her parents. I was very aghast, nervous, and bashful to be invited to such a situation. But I knew it must be done.

    I met them nicely, I should tell you, and it started off in a good way. The idea slapped my mind that I should do a comic bit, to make a good impression and become known to them as a person who is amusing.

    When I saw that baked potatoes were served I got the idea that it would be very good if I pretended I did not know what potatoes was. That would be funny.

    Well let me tell you: backfired on my face. I'll tell you how.

    So first when the potato became on my plate, I acted very interesting. I showed an expression on my face so as to seem that I was confused, astounded but in a restrained way, curious, and interested. They did notice, and seemed confused, but did not remark. So I asked "This looks very interesting. What is this?"

    They stared at me and the mother said "It's a baked potato." And I was saying "Oh, interesting, a baked....what is it again?"

    And she was like "A potato."

    And I was like "A 'potato', oh interesting. Never heard of a potato, looks pretty good."

    And then they didn't see I was clowning, but thought I really did not know what is a potato. So I knew I would be very shamed, humiliated, depressed, and disgusted if I admitted to making a bad joke, so what I did was to act as if it was not a joke but I committed to the act of pretending I didn't know what a potato is.

    They asked me, VERY incredulous, did I really not know what a potato is? That I never heard of a potato. I went with it and told them, yes, I did not ever even hear of a potato. Not only had I never eaten a potato I had never heard the word potato.

    This went on for a bit and my girlfriend was acting very confused and embarrassed by my "*kitten* up antics", and then the more insistent I was about not knowing what a potato is was when them parents starting thinking I DID know what a potato was.

    Well let me tell you I had to commit 100% at this point. When I would not admit to knowing what a potato was, the father especially began to get annoyed. At one point he said something like "Enough is enough. You're *kitten* with us. Admit it." And I said "Sir, before today I never heard of a potato. I still don't know what a potato is, other than some kind of food. I don't know what to tell you."

    Well let me tell you he got very annoyed. I decided to take a bite of the potato, and when I did I made a high pitched noise and said "Taste's very strange!"

    That is when the father started yelling at me, and the mother kept saying "What are you doing?" and my girlfriend went to some other room.

    Finally the father said I should "Get the *kitten* out of his house" and I said it was irrational to treat me like this just because I never heard of a potato before. Well let me tell you he didn't take that kindly.

    Now in text messages I have been telling my girlfriend I really don't know what a potato is. The only way I can ever get out of this is for them to buy that I don't know what a potato is.

    I wish I never started it but I can't go back. I think she will break up with me anyway.

    Just bring them some fries as a reconciliation
  • jrbovee20
    jrbovee20 Posts: 76 Member
    edited March 2018
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  • pudgy1977
    pudgy1977 Posts: 13,499 Member
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    Airing feelings publicly.
  • empresssue
    empresssue Posts: 2,977 Member
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    By opening up to someone I knew I couldn’t trust
  • UltraVegAthlete
    UltraVegAthlete Posts: 667 Member
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    empresssue wrote: »
    By opening up to someone I knew I couldn’t trust

    :( aw, I’m sorry about that. You should write them a long letter about how you can’t trust them and then hand it to them in person and be like “this is why people don’t like you.” Or not say anything at all. Or just ignore them if they try to talk to you.
  • empresssue
    empresssue Posts: 2,977 Member
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    empresssue wrote: »
    By opening up to someone I knew I couldn’t trust

    :( aw, I’m sorry about that. You should write them a long letter about how you can’t trust them and then hand it to them in person and be like “this is why people don’t like you.” Or not say anything at all. Or just ignore them if they try to talk to you.

    Thanks. It was the giant billboard I needed to move along. I won’t be hearing from him again I’m sure.
  • Bullet_with_Butterfly_Wings
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    Engaging in a conversation with an old friend that I knew wouldnt end well...