Less Alcohol- April 2018- One Day at a Time

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  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,163 Member
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    JenT304 wrote: »
    For those that are struggling, I just read this somewhere else: "The path to sobriety has detours along the way. Embrace the times you stumble and fall... pulling yourself up makes you stronger. I started this journey two years ago and refuse to give up. "You only fail when you fail to try."

    I know the rewards of being AF are so much greater than drinking. I just have to get that ingrained in my brain. Great quote!
  • WinoGelato
    WinoGelato Posts: 13,454 Member
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    jecky74 wrote: »
    It has been a very tough week in my house. My father-in-law passed away quite suddenly on Thursday and I have been supporting my husband and my mother-in-law and helping plan everything and take care of them. It was a highly stressful situation and after a long bad day it would’ve been easy to pour a drink but to be honest I’m just too exhausted and only crossed my mind once. I did have one drink last week so I had to restart my streak, but under the circumstances I’m not willing to beat myself up over it.

    Jeff was the best father in law and we will miss him tremendously. Camping won’t be the same without him this summer. Who’s going to argue politics with me? Everything I’m typing seems so small and pathetic, I wish I could find the words.

    Losing him brings up all the feelings from my dads passing as well. Feeling a lot of feelings this week.

    So sorry to hear this.
  • rachelcalsbeek
    rachelcalsbeek Posts: 185 Member
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    jecky74 wrote: »
    It has been a very tough week in my house. My father-in-law passed away quite suddenly on Thursday and I have been supporting my husband and my mother-in-law and helping plan everything and take care of them. It was a highly stressful situation and after a long bad day it would’ve been easy to pour a drink but to be honest I’m just too exhausted and only crossed my mind once. I did have one drink last week so I had to restart my streak, but under the circumstances I’m not willing to beat myself up over it.

    Jeff was the best father in law and we will miss him tremendously. Camping won’t be the same without him this summer. Who’s going to argue politics with me? Everything I’m typing seems so small and pathetic, I wish I could find the words.

    Losing him brings up all the feelings from my dads passing as well. Feeling a lot of feelings this week.

    So sorry for your loss! My mother-in-law passed away very suddenly a couple of years ago. I wish you all the strength in the world to be there for your family. I know it's a hard job. I hope you all can find peace and comfort. :heart:
  • donimfp
    donimfp Posts: 795 Member
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    @jecky74, I wish there were something any of us could say to ease this for you, but be assured you have all the hugs we can mentally send your way.
  • Skyweigh
    Skyweigh Posts: 113 Member
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    springsweet wrote: »
    So I guess I'm back, and I'm pretty annoyed about that. I don't want to quit drinking because I think I'm an alcoholic and I don't want to quit because it's affecting my relationships. I don't want to quit because I can't stop at one (I can sometimes and can't others)... I JUST WANT TO LOSE WEIGHT. That is the ONLY thing I want in life. It's taken over my mind, I'm obsessing about it every day. I hate it. Yesterday, I paid money to join the "Cooking Light Diet" because I will not give up on this ever until I find something that works. I went to the store and spent $80 on food JUST for two days of the diet. Then I had to go home and spend the entire night in my terrible, awful, tiny kitchen making dinner and prepping today's breakfast and lunch. I don't enjoy cooking, and I especially hate it in that kitchen. Anyway, I won't go into details about why I don't think that diet, or any diet, will ever work for me.

    Then I read this article this morning (link below), and remembered... "Oh yeah, I was going to try to quit drinking to lose weight". I seriously had totally forgotten that was an option. But it is, and I know when I quit in Jan, I lost a few pounds in just a couple of weeks.

    Anyway, I can't ever seem to stick to it when I try, so please wish me luck. I really do enjoy my nightly glass of vino, but I hate being 50 lbs overweight more. I hate looking at myself in the mirror. :'( I just need to remember that I guess.

    Day 1 AF here.

    Here's the article: https://greatist.com/live/side-effect-of-not-drinking

    Thank you for posting this article.... very insightful.
  • kittybenn
    kittybenn Posts: 444 Member
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    Oh, boy, so, so sorry reading all this news of family members passing away and lots of folks struggling. I think all of us are here because we've felt that sadness, anger and frustration. We're all here to support each other. Sending healing thoughts everyone's way.
  • lporter229
    lporter229 Posts: 4,907 Member
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    Hi! I am back after my long weekend trip to Charleston and I see that this thread has been busy! I have to say that I love coming here and reading everyone else's thoughts. I think it's great that we have this place where we can come and share our struggles and see that there are so many others out there feeling the same way we do. I think that the posts of @WinoGelato and @donimfp both really hit home with me. I struggle with trying to find that balance. How much is too much? Am I really in control of this or am I just heading down a slippery slope? At the end of the day, I think the fact that we are even here, working through this in our minds, each in our own little way, is a step in the right direction. As long as I continue to visit this thread, monitoring my alcohol intake will always be in my mind. I agree that I sometimes get depressed and/or frustrated that I even have to think about it. But I have come to realize that is how it's going to be for me. If I am not worrying about how much alcohol I am drinking, then I am probably drinking too much. Maybe there will come a day when that is not the case and I can happily go about my life without even giving alcohol a second thought, but I know that there is a long road between me and that point, if and when I choose to get there.

    As for this weekend, I had a great time in Charleston and managed my alcohol consumption very well. If you recall, I set a goal for myself to remain AF from Eater until my trip this past weekend. My goal for this weekend was to enjoy myself and enjoy some of the wonderful libations that Charleston has to offer without going overboard and without having any regrets and I feel good that I accomplished this goal. The purpose of our trip was a two day music festival. I found it really easy not to drink at the festival because it was sunny and warm and I did not want to risk dehydration, drink lines were long, drinks were expensive and also had very little alcohol in them. I mostly stuck to water and enjoyed the music. We did visit some pretty neat establishments after the shows and I had some fancy craft cocktails and enjoyed a good glass of wine each night. I woke up every morning feeling no effects of the previous evening and even went for early morning runs on Saturday and Sunday. All in all, it was a good trip.

    My marathon is now 12 days away. I think it is another good time for an AF streak until then. I will give my body some proper rest and recovery from training and hopefully it will be nice and strong for the race!
  • springsweet
    springsweet Posts: 184 Member
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    kittybenn wrote: »
    Oh, boy, so, so sorry reading all this news of family members passing away and lots of folks struggling. I think all of us are here because we've felt that sadness, anger and frustration. We're all here to support each other. Sending healing thoughts everyone's way.

    Exactly, what kittybenn said. Sorry I was going on and on about myself when I haven't been around for a while.
  • lporter229
    lporter229 Posts: 4,907 Member
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    donimfp wrote: »
    @springsweet, it's good you have a place to release your frustrations. And everyone here understands the need to do that sometimes. I don't know how old you are. You look very young in your picture. I'd just like to say from the perspective of being a good deal older than you that I expressed the very same frustrations about ONLY wanting to lose weight, hating myself in the mirror, etc. some years (decades) ago. Now, I'm shocked when I see pictures of myself back then. I was absolutely beautiful. I always wish I could go back and tell myself that, and that I'd believe myself. Not that I'm denying you want or even need to lose weight, but you sound awfully hard on yourself. I hate that I wasted time and energy "angst-ing" and self-loathing, and it really is weird to look back at photos from 20 or 30 years ago and see, objectively, that I was a beautiful young woman. Maybe not a supermodel, but lovely. Wish I could cook for you. I LOVE to cook and hope to be a chef in my next life. I find prepping food slowly and mindfully can be almost a form of meditation. I wish you some joy in your tiny kitchen. And I'd be willing to bet what you see in the mirror is not what others see. Hugs!!!

    Very well said! One of the artists we saw at the music festival this weekend is Valerie June. I doubt that many of you are familiar with her, but she is a very unique individual (And very talented. I highly recommend checking her out if you are a fan of music). Anyway, in the middle of her set, she was talking about letting your inner light shine and how that is sometimes hard with all that is happening in the world around us, but we only have a short time here on this earth and it is our duty to find that spark within us and let it shine for everyone to see. Of course, she was a lot more eloquent in her delivery. She really, really inspired me. I just wanted to share that because I agree with @donimfp about being so hard on yourself. We all do it. It's human nature, I suppose. But I think if we all try to be a little more self-forgiving and let that light shine through, we will all find our journeys to be a lot easier.
  • SunnyDays930
    SunnyDays930 Posts: 1,486 Member
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    @1stepfwd_LF30 Welcome to the family. You will find nothing but support and encouragement here.

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