Less Alcohol- April 2018- One Day at a Time

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Replies

  • erikNJ
    erikNJ Posts: 1,009 Member
    Cir3 wrote: »
    I quit drinking for four months, but found I had no idea what people do on Friday and Saturday night if not drinking, and have no friends that are not out drinking.
    After a while I gave in and started again but realize it is not really what I want. Have recently cut down to 1x/ week. Was hoping for some suggestions on how to be social on the weekends w/o alcohol?

    That really was the struggle for me, and still is kind of. For awhile I went out to bars with friends and didn’t drink - mostly to test myself. Sometimes I was still able to have a great time. Sometimes it drove me mad and I had to leave early.
    Julie said it right as far as becoming a homebody. I’ve wound up watching movies that I probably wouldn’t have seen and reading more.
  • salleewins
    salleewins Posts: 2,308 Member
    Cir3 wrote: »
    Yes I have binge watched all I care to binge, and do read more, been riding my bicycle and getting back in shape and that feels great. I just want the friends, good times, and laughs without the tab... both financially and physically. I wish sober people would dance funny, sing poorly, and laugh at everything

    You will probably find them. Just will take some time yet. Trying new hobbies, social events and therefore meeting new people hopefully will help. Tough at first, but worth it.
  • Alzzi76
    Alzzi76 Posts: 504 Member
    erikNJ wrote: »
    Alzzi76 wrote: »
    erikNJ wrote: »
    sdogg626 wrote: »
    SD1957 wrote: »
    I mark an X on my calendar on my AF days. I aim for at least 2 days a week - it's a visual I can look at to see where I am on any given day. Sometimes I falter and go 3-4 days the following week.

    I do this too! I was AF 18 out of 31 days in March, aiming higher for April! Also, I wish I loved tea the way some of you do, I just find it boring :/

    I am with you, I don’t get the tea thing at all. And for something I dont get it seems like a waste to spend money buying a bunch of it hoping I do like one. I LOVE coffee but I cant have that at night or I will never sleep. It’s basically just water for me on my days I dont drink

    Haha :D your funny, i bet if i told u a fact abt coffee , what its doing to u and u see it is.. i bet youll find a way out of it.. ;):p

    There r really nice teas that kind of has the same taste as coffee like rooibos and there's another ..Russian caravan or u could try chi tea thats * curl- a- mo* ;) fruit tea is yum too..

    Maybe, but i’m sure we could pick apart all of our diets and find things that we shouldn’t have.
    What a terribly boring world it would be if we couldn’t have hardly anything we enjoyed ...

    U take the cake, man. I agree with u!!
  • Alzzi76
    Alzzi76 Posts: 504 Member
    I have a confession.. I've not quite let loose but im having a good drink b4 i have to quit totally tomorrow for a few months with blood test checks.. :/ hmm... it's going to b a chellenge.
    Haa, as Erick says.. life is boring so i thought id crack the bordom tonight bcoz im going to have to b mega strict.
    So it'll b Aug/ Sept b4 i can drink.. :#:):D but it's all for a good cause ;);)

    Luv to u all..
  • dressagerider1020
    dressagerider1020 Posts: 108 Member
    Alzzi76 wrote: »
    I have a confession.. I've not quite let loose but im having a good drink b4 i have to quit totally tomorrow for a few months with blood test checks.. :/ hmm... it's going to b a chellenge.
    Haa, as Erick says.. life is boring so i thought id crack the bordom tonight bcoz im going to have to b mega strict.
    So it'll b Aug/ Sept b4 i can drink.. :#:):D but it's all for a good cause ;);)

    Luv to u all..

    I found it very easy to stay away from wine when I was getting blood work. It became all about my health, and that overcame everything else. It also carried over when it was done, so I don't drink nearly as much as I did. March wasn't great, but comparatively speaking, it was better than my past.

    I'm using some of the ideas here for AF drinks, there really is so much out there that is healthy...I know it's difficult to go out to bars and stay sober, but it's possible. There were several ideas here about being designated driver. Try different things and find what works for you. :)

    https://fbcover.com/facebook/food-drink/alcohol-free-drinks.html



  • SunnyDays930
    SunnyDays930 Posts: 1,572 Member
    @JulieAL1969 No one here is disappointed in you! You have been such an inspiration to all of us here and probably hundreds of others silently following this thread! You had what, 3 drinking days in 103 days?! That is awesome! Besides being a "very occasional drinker" seems so much less daunting then declaring you are never going to drink again. That's what I am aspiring to anyway. XXOO
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    @Alzzi76 One last hurrah before you get down to business. Annie Grace (author) says that sometimes you need to do that and observe how it makes you feel. Xo
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    salleewins wrote: »
    Cir3 wrote: »
    Yes I have binge watched all I care to binge, and do read more, been riding my bicycle and getting back in shape and that feels great. I just want the friends, good times, and laughs without the tab... both financially and physically. I wish sober people would dance funny, sing poorly, and laugh at everything

    You will probably find them. Just will take some time yet. Trying new hobbies, social events and therefore meeting new people hopefully will help. Tough at first, but worth it.

    Good advice. Sometimes, I found that the friend group changes because the only thing we had in common was we like to drink.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    All January and February, I had incredible resolve. I have to get back to that determination.
    Not crazy about the book Recovering: Intoxication and its aftermath that I brought up a few days ago. I downloaded first few chapters (sample) and she talks all about other authors who have had trouble with alcohol but that enhanced their writing. I know she's going somewhere with these first few chapters, but I am not interested in buying the rest of the book. Just sayin'
  • lporter229
    lporter229 Posts: 4,907 Member
    There are so many comments I want to make on this thread that sometimes I end up not posting at all...

    @JulieAL1969- Nobody is disappointed in you! We continue to be inspired. I think it is great that you are able to go out and have one drink and call it a night. That takes a lot of self control. I am sorry to hear that you did not feel well this morning. Although that's never enjoyable, I am sure it will help solidify the decision that you have made for positive changes in your life.

    @donimfp- That is terrible news. So sorry to hear that. Hopefully this will end up turning into an opportunity to start something new and positive. All the more reason to stay sober. Wishing you the best . *hugs*

    @Cir3- I completely understand. Trying to cut back or eliminate alcohol has made me realize how many of my friendships revolve around alcohol and also just how much my friends drink. I also tend to avoid these situations rather than deal with them head on, but I think Julie's approach and the approach of many others is a good one. Being in these situations and staying sober can be eye opening and also serve as a helpful reminder of why we chose not to drink. I feel like over time I will end up forming new relationships and maybe spend less time with my current friends, but I think it needs to be a gradual process. Cutting them from my life entirely is not a good option.

    Currently I have been spending more time with my running group friends and friends that I volunteer with at a church food pantry. Many of these people drink alcohol. Some, I suspect, even drink excessively, based on comments that have been made here and there. However, due to dynamic of the groups (health and service), everyone tends to be on their best behavior in situations where alcohol is involved. This makes it a lot easier to enjoy drinks in moderation because everyone around you is doing so. Just an observation.

    Today is day 4 AF for me. It hasn't been particularly difficult, but it does seem like a lot longer than 3 days! Good or bad, it seems like there are more hours in the day when you are not drinking.
  • salleewins
    salleewins Posts: 2,308 Member
    Leeg5656 wrote: »
    Last night hubby wanted to have a drink and he was like, 'are you sure you don't want a glass?'. I bought these just to try them out on these occasions. 'Almost' like a real glass of wine. It was nice and floral. The bottle says 'delicate' and it was. The whole bottle is only 45 calories, so that was a win
    too. And it gave my mouth and hand something 'to do' while we were enjoying the beautiful weather last night grilling our dinner. I was so happy that I stuck with it last night.
    jcr0ld3qtr1b.jpg

    That sounds fun! Nice job! Those are no alcohol?? Wonder where he bought them. I will have to look around.
  • SpanishFusion
    SpanishFusion Posts: 261 Member
    @salleewins He was actually trying to tempt me with a real glass of wine. LOL! But that was ok. I had this in the pantry.
    Correct. No alcohol. I found it at Kroger. It was in the 'health' food section where they keep all the different flavors of coconut water and such. Next time I go, I'm getting more. They had different flavors too.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    I'm rewatching my inspirational
    Videos -
    This one is by Craig Beck of Alcohol Lied to Me
    https://youtu.be/AhFTib4vMPo
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,348 Member
    donimfp wrote: »
    Good morning, friends. I have to smile at the conversation about blood work. I do that, too. I'm super good leading up to it, but then I realize that the blood is in me all the time, so why am I trying to "clean it up" for a test? It's like my sister who says she has to "cram" for her teeth cleaning.

    Anyway . . . I learned yesterday that as of May 31 I will not have a job. This is a big deal. I am so glad I didn't know this before I went to Italy. I probably wouldn't have gone. I got the news. I drank. Some. Too much (but not what too much would have been last year). Decisions to make. Things to cut (Goodbye, personal trainer and manicures. First World Problems . . . I don't foresee trips to the food bank, so shut up). I would like to go through this sober.

    So sorry to hear that about your job! I once heard that when you lose your job it's the perfect time to reinvent yourself. What are the dreams you've been holding back on? What else inspires you ? Don't panic however. After the shock, make a plan. You are a wise, highly capable person ! A champion and a thriver (play on the word survivor)
  • salleewins
    salleewins Posts: 2,308 Member
    @donimfp I am sorry to hear that news! I have been there! You will do it and you can be sober like I wasn't. You will be able to think clearly and make great decisions. I wish for you something even better. Let us know regularly how you are doing.
  • erikNJ
    erikNJ Posts: 1,009 Member
    @donimfp I am so sorry to hear the bad news :/
    These are the kind if things we can’t control in life but it always hits hard. You will come out of this better.
    And you are right, good thing you got that nice vacation in beforehand. Glad you had that experience!
  • erikNJ
    erikNJ Posts: 1,009 Member
    @JulieAL1969 I don’t think you have to worry about anyone here being disappointed in you. You know that this group is nothing but support for each other. I think it’s admirable you were able to only have one. I know I have been there, and that first time it feels odd, but also proud to know I could stop at one.
  • donimfp
    donimfp Posts: 795 Member
    @JenT304, that sounds good! I always thought ginger beer had alcohol. Good to know it doesn’t! Virgin Moscow Mules!
  • salleewins
    salleewins Posts: 2,308 Member
    @JenT304 ---oooh that sounds great! I was just at the Aldi discount (mostly) grocery store and I spotted ginger beer just a couple of days ago. I haven't looked at the price yet. You are right on the organ damage.

    @JulieAL1969--thanks for Craig Beck's videos and program. I had never heard that the liver gets scarred and the scars are permanent from alcohol. I listened to quite a few and am glad there are more.