Less Alcohol- April 2018- One Day at a Time
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SanDiegofitmom wrote: »@JulieAL1969 you have been inspiring! I hope the party was fun AF. I went to a wedding in Jan when I was dry. It was fun but not “as” fun, mostly because of that mental thought process - like feeling punished. The next day I was so grateful to feel awesome, but I definitely didn’t want to stay late at the party by any means. I also hung out at the dessert table a little too much ha!
I am laughing because I did hang out at the food and dessert table, too!
I am happy to hear you're having a wonderful time in Mexico! And I bet the margaritas taste amazing; I imagine them being a real one and no mix involved. Xo
The birthday girl and her husband do not drink. He is also an alcohol addiction counselor as well as a member of AA for about 10 years now. I wanted to pick his brain and share with our group what worked for him. But at the party, there wasnt time.
I did tell him that it feels like a punishment sometimes being AF, and he said that feeling definitely fades. Now, he rarely ever think about alcohol. But he also does still attend AA once in awhile.
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Cleosweetie wrote: »JulieAL1969 wrote: »
Agreed about Mad Men! I stuck it out for four episodes because of all the rave reviews but one of the main reasons I stopped watching is that I found the constant drinking, smoking, and sexual harassing to be distracting and ultimately, tiresome! Ok, we get it! They drank and smoke and harassed women! All the time! Constantly! We get it! Lol.
Nice to hear from you:)
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After drinking 1-3 drinks pretty much every day for at least 3 years, I now haven't had any alcohol since January 31st this year.
Some of you may know me from other threads. Brief bio: I'm Australian. I lost 80 lbs from April 2015 to April 2016, and have since maintained my goal weight. I started running in September 2015 and ran my first marathon in August 2017. I'm madly obsessed with parkrun and running.
I've popped into this thread a couple of times in March and liked seeing the community here.
How I stopped drinking:
On January 31 an MFP running friend posted a status about being kind to "Tomorrow You". Then I was posting about my alcohol consumption to one of my two running friends who'd done "Dry January", and another friend somehow said I could go alcohol free for "Feb Fast" as a challenge that might suit me.
I decided to take that as a dare, but also see how I'd go, because my birthday was in February and I didn't want to be a martyr.
I actually found it really easy! Instead of my nightly ritual of a drinkie, I had a sparkling mineral water with fruit juice. Bit of sweetness, laughing!
I kept thinking of "Tomorrow Me" and looked at a day off alcohol not as a difficult thing, but a lovely thing I am doing for myself.
I'm not lumbering myself with headaches or guilt to deal with the next day. New day, hooray!
When I got to my birthday near the end of February, I felt like it would be a nice thing if I didn't drink on it for the first time since I started drinking 30+ years ago. Instead I had alcohol-free bubbly, and it was lovely.
I kept going in March because I couldn't remember if I hadn't gone that long without drinking since age 18 (apart from pregnancy).
Now I'm on a streak of the longest I've gone in 30+ years I'm not sure how to start drinking again!
I don't want to be a martyr and give something pleasurable up forever. I'm pretty anti-AA, to be honest, and find a lot of what I know of them to be woo. I believe in moderation. I'm not an alcoholic. I'm whatever I want to be.
I want to be able to have a couple of bubblies to celebrate a special occasion, then go back to being alcohol-free till I have another special reason to celebrate.
I'm working out the plan of attack for that. Maybe when I finish painting my room soon. Or when I do my 50 km run hopefully in June. Hmm. Thinking while I type, that could be the plan. Have two events planned, rather than an open-ended once that isn't specific enough. Drink once, then again later, as something to look forward to. Ooh, I'm liking this thread already!
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Thank you @Orphia for telling us your story! I would like to celebrate like that with alcohol, but I am not sure it really is possible for me. I have been down too many wrong paths with it and personally at this point don't want to find out I can't moderate again. If I am ever not under so much stress, maybe I will see. Probably not, however, it is not necessary for my life. I like the positive mindset that you have about it. I wish you the best with everything in your journey. How did you lose that weight, btw, like that? Your story is impressive. Is your story on that on another thread? I got 35 lbs off and maintained for about a year. I want to do it again. Thanks for sharing.
I don't like being called an alcoholic, but if that is what keeps me dry then I can deal with it, lol (mostly). I am getting back into running and am training to do my first 5k for Domestic Violence in May in honor of my 2 late sons--yes you read it right--2--1984 and 2015. I am up to run/walking it at this point and that is probably what I will be doing for it. I sustained a back injury in 2011, so this training is a miracle in itself. I have done a half-marathon before and walking 5ks prior to the injury. I am excited about it. This would NOT be happening if I was drinking the way I was.
Thank you @JulieAL1969 for being you and also for being honest. It seems like you are trying to find out what is best for you. You have made some remarkable accomplishments with your goals. It is inspiring to see you working it out for yourself as it is with all of us here. Thank you for sharing it with all of us! This thread has helped me in so many ways. Thank you for your work in encouraging us!7 -
We sat at the bar last night and I asked the bartender if he could make me a mocktail. He looked confused. So I said, "ok well check with Sean (the other bartender) and see what you can come up with." He ended up bringing me a Shirley Temple! I don't think I have had one of those since I was about nine. But I liked having my pretty drink in a fancy glass, alcohol free and had a good time with my husband. I am slowly losing the urge to drink. Slowly. Reading the posts here and watching Craig Beck videos on you tube helps me stay the course. Happy Saturday Everyone!7
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Hi all, I’ve been checking in and reading along and cheering/commiserating/crying with you all from afar.
@donimfp I’m so sorry to hear about the job loss. I agree with others that while you’re in the thick of it you may not see it as a new opportunity but almost everyone I’ve known that has been through it has come out and said it was the best thing that could have happened.
@salleewins I am so sorry for your loss of your son, it’s clear the pain is still so raw for you and I can’t imagine losing a child but I just wanted to say how proud we all are of you and your resolve during that difficult time is amazing.
To the vets of these threads (Julie, Kitty, Erik, Alzzi, Jen and others) who started this effort in January and who are still plugging away but sometimes struggling to stay on goal whether that be alcohol free or alcohol diminished - some days are easier than others but what matters is we all keep showing up, staying accountable to ourselves, and allowing others to support us even when we feel like we’ve let ourselves or each other down.
To the new members, especially one of my favorite and long time, MFP inspirations @Orphia, welcome. It’s so good to have new faces here and it helps remind some of us why we are doing this to hear your stories, your struggles - this is such a great subcommunity of MFP, you’ll love it.
@SanDiegofitmom I’m glad you are having fun in Mexico!
Had a similar back to back situation myself - Mexico and then a work trip. All that is finally over and I’m ready to get back on track. In the spirit of accountability - I’ve had multiple drinks every single day since March 25th. All inclusive plus Easter plus a sales meeting plus a friends 50th Bday at a bar last night. I’m ok with it - I’ve had a lot of good times and I still do feel successful in that I haven’t drank so much to pass out, no hangovers, no real regrets. I remember all the conversations with colleagues and friends and wasn't worried about what I might have said or done. Last night on the way home from the bar my husband and I talked the whole way home and watched a show and ate some popcorn when we got back - normally I would have been passed out in the car and staggered straight to bed trying to convince him I hadn't drank as much as I did...
I’m looking forward to getting back in my routine though, of logging my food, purposeful exercise, and abstaining from alcohol during the week. Maybe even some weekends too since I have quite a few damp days under my belt already for the first week of April. I have one more big social event next Saturday - another 50th Bday with a heavy, drinking crew (my in laws!) but beyond that I can’t think of any big social situations or challenges for the rest of the month.
Alright enough rambling. Time to get coffee and bundle up - it’s a chilly 33 degrees for the first day of spring soccer for my kiddos!7 -
I'm late, but in! No alcohol for the month.4
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Hi friends! I’m at hotel breakfast in Ft. Worth where the temp. is 37 w/ windchill of 27. What???? It was 87 when I got here yesterday.
Thanks all for the job-loss encouragement. I do believe it will be a positive thing. I started the company in 1998 and sold it in 2006. Have stayed on as editor since then. Sadly my position is not financially sustainable for them any longer. I’m welcome to continue on a contract basis but probably won’t.
I made a science of packing in a carry-on only for my recent 13-day Italy adventure. Now I’m having fantasies of being a professional organizer. Stuff like doing the mise en place for a chef is what floats my boat.
Yesterday on my drive I checked email and had one from The Sober School. Kate said “Sobriety delivers what alcohol promises.” Simple thought but for me it was kind of profound. Relaxation, fun, lessened anxiety. Those things I seek from alcohol are actually delivered by sobriety. I’m sure Kate’s course is worthwhile but after learning the price I decided this must not be for me at this time.
Wishing everyone a great weekend and success with whatever your goals are.7 -
Had one drink this entire week! Feeling good!4
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I've just discovered a delicious mocktail on the inside of the Lipton Lemon Ginger tea box. Brew a cup of this tea and refrigerate. Pour over ice and top with ginger beer and a squeeze of lime. This is very refreshing and I can picture myself sitting on the patio (if it ever warms up here) and enjoying this. I've never had/bought ginger beer and it was more expensive than I thought it would be, but still cheaper and less damaging to my organs and waistline than wine.
thanks for sharing, @JenT304! this sounds great!
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7 Days without booze! I got through 2 staff parties, 1 best friends 40th birthday, and 1 friday night Happy Hour without a single sip. Treating myself to a $9 tea latte and not even feeling guilty about it!
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Thanks, @salleewins and my dear @WinoGelato for your kind welcomes.Kate said “Sobriety delivers what alcohol promises.”
@donimfp That's a really great quote!2 -
Ok I broke it in the very first week4
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nickiwalsh5 wrote: »Ok I broke it in the very first week
That's ok! Just start again. Day 1 tomorrow. Xo1 -
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@sarahbums Yay! Good for you!
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@Orphia Love your comments and reflections! I like the "Tomorrow you". That is really eye opening for me. We are striving for good health for tomorrow's you.
@salleewins I hear where you're coming from. Moderation is not for me either. I am still struggling with saying to myself, "I'm done, never again." But I am getting really close to that. Tonight, I was alone in my house for a few hours - no kids or husband. It was heavenly. The old me would have made several manhattans and viewed this evening as a time to celebrate.
Instead, I made lots of tea. Watched a movie, read a book. All without being tempted to make just a little drink. By now, I seriously would have been drunk and trying to hide it from my family when they got home.
This thread and you, and so many others keeps me focused and on track. I do not think I could do this without some support system. I'm so happy you are in a good place and navigating successfully.
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@twyla77 Yahoo! You did so well. And also don't forget , you saved yourself from potential headaches and hangover. Now, you strengthened your willpower muscle!2
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@donimfp You are an entrepreneur at heart. Sounds like you have some great ideas bubbling to the surface. The Sober School's message is perfect for you. (And Us) Looking forward to hearing about your journey. Xoxo2
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@lisamoravec And think of all the hundreds of calories you saved and money, too. Awesome week!0
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ckfromedmonton wrote: »I'm late, but in! No alcohol for the month.
No, you're just on time! Welcome to our AF journey. Let us know what works for you.1 -
@WinoGelato Love all of your messages and comments. You are a positive, wonderful person. I love hearing your thoughts.0
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@JenT304 Shirley Temple! I used to love those. I just may ask for one next time and see what the bartender says.
It's kind of puzzling that the bartender hasnt heard of mocktails. I seem to see that they are a growing trend.1 -
We sat at the bar last night and I asked the bartender if he could make me a mocktail. He looked confused. So I said, "ok well check with Sean (the other bartender) and see what you can come up with." He ended up bringing me a Shirley Temple! I don't think I have had one of those since I was about nine. But I liked having my pretty drink in a fancy glass, alcohol free and had a good time with my husband. I am slowly losing the urge to drink. Slowly. Reading the posts here and watching Craig Beck videos on you tube helps me stay the course. Happy Saturday Everyone!
I’m surprised that’s what he came up with! But at least you had the experience of a fun drink. I’ll never forget the amazing mocktail I got in SF when I was pregnant and on a work trip- it was like citrus, muttled with mint maybe are bitters NA? I feel like depth of flavor is what is missing with most mocktail! I also wish that NA wines tasted better!! I hear there is a lot more NA beer that tastes nearly as good! I looked for some at BevMo but didn’t see anything. If anyone knows of an NA IPA that’s actually worth drinking let me know! I would love some for the summer bbqing!1 -
@WinoGelato yep! The back to back to back is met too! In the last 20 days I’ve been in Chicago, in Paso Robles wine country for my 40th and now in Mexico on vacation and then in a week I’m in SF. All these celebrations are catching up with me and I’m just ready to work out, eat salad and drink sparkling water
I just hope the transition back to AF isn’t too hard 
I feel like I’ve been indulging for too long and ready to reign it in! 2 -
https://www.harpersbazaar.com/celebrity/latest/g11644970/celebrities-who-dont-drink-alcohol/?src=arb_fb_m
This came up on my FB feed tonight. The ads are annoying (and some creepy) but scrolling through the list is interesting. Think how many of us have commented about feeling like we are the only ones at social events not drinking - imagine what it’s like for those celebrities!2 -
JulieAL1969 wrote: »@Orphia Love your comments and reflections! I like the "Tomorrow you". That is really eye opening for me. We are striving for good health for tomorrow's you.
@JulieAL1969 Thanks! Hope it's helpful.
More on "Tomorrow You":
Instead of lumbering myself with guilt, headaches, and poor nutrition hangovers the next day, we can think how nice it would be not to feel that way tomorrow. I love "me" and don't want "Tomorrow Me" to feel awful.
Instead of thinking alcohol is something nice to have *now*, think of NOT drinking as something nice we can do for the person we are when we awaken in the morning.
Sort of like banking calories for a festive occasion, we can bank a good mood for when we wake up.
We need to have sympathy for "Tomorrow You" and be kind to her/him.
It makes it easier if we don't look at not drinking as a punishment for being bad or having no willpower.
Instead we can look at it like not drinking is a lovely, sympathetic gesture towards the person we are now, and whom we will wake up as.
A real treat for body and mind.
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I’m still dry in April! I had my last drink in March... the 4th to be exact. I’d like to make it through to June... it’s my Dirty Thirty June 5th and I’ve challenged myself to do a 5K. Sooo I’m Dry until afterwards!! It’s been mostly easy. Tonight with a campfire in the back yard was difficult. I do find though, now that I’m logging my food and counting Macros I’d much rather eat food than drink. Down 2.5”!!! On my way!5
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WinoGelato wrote: »https://www.harpersbazaar.com/celebrity/latest/g11644970/celebrities-who-dont-drink-alcohol/?src=arb_fb_m
This came up on my FB feed tonight. The ads are annoying (and some creepy) but scrolling through the list is interesting. Think how many of us have commented about feeling like we are the only ones at social events not drinking - imagine what it’s like for those celebrities!
52 people! Quite interesting, and it makes me ponder on all the soul-searching that's been done by so many.
We sometimes all feel alone, but we're all so similar.3
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