You know you're on MyFitnessPal for too long when...
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You wink at your friends statuses when they say "cleaning, moderate effort!"0
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I do so many of these :laugh:0
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When you can't remember if:
A) you were ever friends with someone, or they've just been on your friend's friend list forever.
you were once friends with someone but they deleted you, or vice versa.
C) you've already requested them but were rejected
Makes it hard to decide whether to send a request sometimes :laugh:
Also, I like to think some of the madness wears off after a while. I'm no longer stressed by missing a day (it tends to mean I have a life...), I eat what I want rather than what is easiest to log and I know that only custom settings are appropriate for me, so The Red Bar of Doom has no power over me.0 -
When you can accurately predict the contents of a thread just by reading the (same old, tired, repetitive) thread title.
"WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?!!?" -Poster probably hasn't lost weight for 3.5 days and is freaking out. If it's an actual weight loss stall, most likely is either overeating and/or underexercising - but will be shocked and offended if you happen to mention this. They will probably report you and you will get banned for trying to be helpful.
"ALWAYS SO HUNGRY" -Poster is eating 400-800 calories a day or some other ludicrous amount and/or isn't eating exercise calories back and/or has set some insane goal.
"HOW DOES MY ROUTINE LOOK" -Poster has concocted a random workout routine that is comprised of bicep curls with milk jugs, crunches, bikram yoga and zumba. And invariably calls it strength training.
"CAN'T EAT XXXX CALORIES" -Poster got 150lbs overweight but then suddenly can't figure out how to eat 1200 calories a day. I assume most of these posts are humblebragging about their dedication and/or (even worse) are pro-ana people.
"IS EATING 0-1000 CALORIES A DAY OKAY??!?" -Poster knows it's not okay or they wouldn't be asking. Yet they are guaranteed to be defensive and often offended when everyone answers their plain question in a truthful manner.
"I FEEL LIKE GIVING UP" -Poster is a thinly veiled attention *kitten*. If you were going to give up, you'd just give up. If you were going to keep kicking *kitten*, you'd keep on kicking *kitten*. If you make a thread like this, you are simply throwing a pity party for yourself. Oh, woe is me.
"HELP, GAINED <small amount of weight> FROM BINGE" -Poster invariably ate a bunch of carbs and/or salty food and thinks they have magically gained 5lbs of fat overnight. Responses will generally prod the user to weigh in less often, despite the fact that weighing every day would accustom the average person to the daily weight fluctuations that effect everyone.
"HOW MUCH DOES IT LOOK LIKE I WEIGH" -Poster is a teenage attention *kitten*.
"EVERYBODY HERE IS SO MEAN" -Poster has been on the internet for two whole weeks and is highly offended by all of the helpful posters that will correct people spouting myths and misinformation. Poster just wants support for their 400 calorie a day intake while performing the master cleanse and the military diet reboot. If poster were to venture outside of MFP to any other part of the internet, they would probably die from shock.
"BITE/SUCK/LICK/MARRY/BANG/FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS OR MURDER" -Poster is a complete idiot and should be removed from the gene pool immediately.
You can also accurately predict details about the poster by the contents of their posts. You can discern gender, age, level of experience, intelligence, everything. Just simply looking at someone's join date, number of posts and avatar you already know 90% of what you need to know about them. Hell, you can smell a beachbody "coach" or a Visalus or Herbalife or whatever salesperson, from a mile away.
Yup! And the "HAS ANYONE TRIED [insert name of crazy diet and/or magic pill here]" thread- falls along the same lines of the other I-know-this-is bad-for-me-but-condone-it-anyway-or-I'll-get-defensive threads.
Along with:
* Developing a passionate dislike for Dr. Oz even though you've never seen his show
* When your fiance suddenly loses 70 lbs and he attributes it to YOUR diet
* .............and then you get irritated because "it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle change."0 -
You dream about myfitness pal. I dreamt I drank a glass of wine, then logged it in and found out it had 10,000 cals per serving.0
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Oh sooo thisWhen the 1st thought that pops in your mind when you meet new people in real life "Bang, kiss, lick, bite hug, just friends, pass"0 -
When you visit family and they live where there is no internet service, including cell phone service, and you have a panic attack!! Yes that happen to me last week!!0
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When you tell folks to look you up on MFP instead of FB:-) or when you log on at a red light because you don't want to miss up your count!! But I still have a ways to go before I have been on here too long:-) I kinda dig it here:-)0
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SMASH
wait... what just happened?0 -
When your no longer my fitness pals but my significant fitness others0
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Okay, I need an intervention, because I do most of these! lol0
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Bump0
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...when you've racked up a load of forum posts but find you've gone full circle on topics
...when you get annoyed at said forum topics
...when you come to terms that people are just starting out and are doing things you learned on here 3 years ago
...when you see someone restart their weight loss after gaining 100lbs that they lost for the third time
...when you're day counter is bigger than the number of calories regularly burned0 -
When you tell folks to look you up on MFP instead of FB:-) or when you log on at a red light because you don't want to miss up your count!! But I still have a ways to go before I have been on here too long:-) I kinda dig it here:-)
Hahaha this one... and start quoting about MFP and how amazing it is at understanding food and exercise and general basic physics of conservation of energy/thermodynamics, when people on UKBride start banging on about their terrible weight loss regimes that are going to absolutely without a shadow of a doubt fail because they think 0.5km slow walking a day on a treadmill is going to lose them loads of weight in the 2 months before their wedding...0 -
When you can accurately predict the contents of a thread just by reading the (same old, tired, repetitive) thread title.
"WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?!!?" -Poster probably hasn't lost weight for 3.5 days and is freaking out. If it's an actual weight loss stall, most likely is either overeating and/or underexercising - but will be shocked and offended if you happen to mention this. They will probably report you and you will get banned for trying to be helpful.
"ALWAYS SO HUNGRY" -Poster is eating 400-800 calories a day or some other ludicrous amount and/or isn't eating exercise calories back and/or has set some insane goal.
"HOW DOES MY ROUTINE LOOK" -Poster has concocted a random workout routine that is comprised of bicep curls with milk jugs, crunches, bikram yoga and zumba. And invariably calls it strength training.
"CAN'T EAT XXXX CALORIES" -Poster got 150lbs overweight but then suddenly can't figure out how to eat 1200 calories a day. I assume most of these posts are humblebragging about their dedication and/or (even worse) are pro-ana people.
"IS EATING 0-1000 CALORIES A DAY OKAY??!?" -Poster knows it's not okay or they wouldn't be asking. Yet they are guaranteed to be defensive and often offended when everyone answers their plain question in a truthful manner.
"I FEEL LIKE GIVING UP" -Poster is a thinly veiled attention *kitten*. If you were going to give up, you'd just give up. If you were going to keep kicking *kitten*, you'd keep on kicking *kitten*. If you make a thread like this, you are simply throwing a pity party for yourself. Oh, woe is me.
"HELP, GAINED <small amount of weight> FROM BINGE" -Poster invariably ate a bunch of carbs and/or salty food and thinks they have magically gained 5lbs of fat overnight. Responses will generally prod the user to weigh in less often, despite the fact that weighing every day would accustom the average person to the daily weight fluctuations that effect everyone.
"HOW MUCH DOES IT LOOK LIKE I WEIGH" -Poster is a teenage attention *kitten*.
"EVERYBODY HERE IS SO MEAN" -Poster has been on the internet for two whole weeks and is highly offended by all of the helpful posters that will correct people spouting myths and misinformation. Poster just wants support for their 400 calorie a day intake while performing the master cleanse and the military diet reboot. If poster were to venture outside of MFP to any other part of the internet, they would probably die from shock.
"BITE/SUCK/LICK/MARRY/BANG/FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS OR MURDER" -Poster is a complete idiot and should be removed from the gene pool immediately.
You can also accurately predict details about the poster by the contents of their posts. You can discern gender, age, level of experience, intelligence, everything. Just simply looking at someone's join date, number of posts and avatar you already know 90% of what you need to know about them. Hell, you can smell a beachbody "coach" or a Visalus or Herbalife or whatever salesperson, from a mile away.
Yup! And the "HAS ANYONE TRIED [insert name of crazy diet and/or magic pill here]" thread- falls along the same lines of the other I-know-this-is bad-for-me-but-condone-it-anyway-or-I'll-get-defensive threads.
Along with:
* Developing a passionate dislike for Dr. Oz even though you've never seen his show
* When your fiance suddenly loses 70 lbs and he attributes it to YOUR diet
* .............and then you get irritated because "it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle change."
HAHAHAHAHA! yes to all of this!0 -
This has to be the best thread in a while... I have mostly been avoiding the forums because of half the said topics mentioned and their predictability and nonsense!
ALLELUJAH! A thread I can join in on and reflect my time of MFP and what it has taught me!0 -
When you carry a tablespoon on your key ring for those coffee stops
When the hubby actually measures your food and gives you those on a sticky note
Ok, so this is fabulous! I am totally going to do this!!0 -
When you make friends through memes
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When you realize HRMs are terribly inaccurate in many cases but pretty deadly for steady state cardio... Which you don't do because you realized even at below healthy BMIs you can be flabby aka 'skinny fat'and you get leaner and slimmer at a heavier weight when you just lift weights.
And you know that when someone says "Heavy lifting" is what's "heavy for you" they mean heavy to the point that it's "85% your max lift at about 5 reps" and not "lift this purse weight until it feels like it's 'heavy for you'"
Lifting weights for many reps is not heavy lifting in the fitness community, but is great for endurance.
You can not make a muscle leaner. We are people, we have people densitied muscles and cannot change that.
Getting stronger does not mean growing muscle. To grow denser muscle you need fuel ie a calorie surplus. You can not grow denser muscle continuously on a calorie deficit, you only lose it.
People think they are gaining muscles or fat when they are still losing weight if they see anything but something static on the scales and measuring tape departments. We are not static things. Progress looks like a slanted chain saw, not a hill.
Making a muscle 'longer' involves moving the fixed points on your bones...in other words, let me help you make your legs long and lean by helping you go out there and break a leg.
Tone is more about music then exercise. It means way to many things to way to many people. Never go into those threads responding assuming knowledge that you know what they mean, you probably don't.
Low cal diets far below your TDEE/BMR can suppress your metabolism and make you cold because of thermogensis etc.
You realize that you need fat to absorb the nutrients you're eating, and are eating more cals then most on the site, and you're having better success and complain less, even if you're larger.
You think high protein is far above the average it stops promoting LBM, and realize everyone else thinks high protein is above the FDA/MFP recommendation to avoid deficiency.
You realize carbs are not the devil, and are great if you're not sedentary.
You also know a lot of fitness buzz words that mean nothing to the general public but realize that everyone else here will assume you know.0
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