The Sober Squad- Alcohol Free Living

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Replies

  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    @joha5603 You had two drinks of scotch, a cocktail, and a beer.

    I could tell it wasn't going to end well when you had a scotch before you went out. Drinking before the actual event began rings alarm bells for me. Scotch doubly so.

    Mixing drinks - no wonder 3 am was awful! Beer after spirits makes my stomach curdle just thinking about it.

    Still, no damage done.

    On the good side, you learned a lot, and failed much better than you used to, I expect! Don't punish yourself over this. x

  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    RubyRed427 wrote: »
    I was in that same situation. Lots of wine bottles in recycling and a few other liquor bottles. I would go through my liquor cabinet sometimes and finish up the bottles that were less filled. And then say to myself I am NOT buying any more liquor. Lately, I quietly monitor what my husband recycles. One huge bottle of Johnny Walker every other week. I don’t always see it in recycling which leads me to think, he’s hiding it in the garbage sometimes.

    @RubyRed427 Does your husband drink anything else? One bottle every two weeks isn't terrible.

    You're a good friend, so I hope you don't mind me saying that sounds a bit paranoid/controlling.

    Have you been arguing with each other about alcohol again? x
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
    Hi all. Are there any plans for a formal "Dry January"? tia.
  • whitpauly
    whitpauly Posts: 1,483 Member
    Ok,we're all learning something new about ourselves and the way drinking can effect us,there is no failure! This is a opportunity to improve ourselves by not drinking alcohol,sometimes we slip up,sometimes we just have the heck with it attitude and give in to drinking,the important thing is that we learn something each time I think,new coping skills,new attitudes and determination,etc,@RubyRed427 I'm with you,,alcohol just makes me sick and like @joha5603 said it ages me overnight,my stomach gets wrecked and I get that that 3 am wake up anxiety/sweats no matter what if I've drank,bloody awful feeling,Yuck! Hope we all have a super,sober Sunday <3
  • joha5603
    joha5603 Posts: 102 Member
    RubyRed427 wrote: »
    Drank wine last night. Bad idea. One glass opened the door to five more. I cannot drink. I have serious problems and feel quite badly about myself today. When will I learn? Day 1 and mad at myself for this horrible hangover I caused. 😕

    Oh, RubyRed427 ...! I wish I could hug you in real life! It's just a hangover, and you know it'll pass, and tomorrow you'll feel better and you will be better informed for the next time. Isn't the idea of a glass of wine lovely? Sounds so classy, so reasonable! ...but apparently it's not us. It's not for us, and it's a tough one to handle. I get it. I see you! I see me in you, too. You made a bad choice, but that's all -- it doesn't make you a bad person. Please don't feel bad about yourself. You're good people, I can tell from what you write here. Hang in there, Ruby. :smiley:
  • lorrainequiche59
    lorrainequiche59 Posts: 900 Member
    RubyRed427 wrote: »
    I have to get over the fact that other people can drink , but I cannot.

    And you WILL. You are one of my biggest inspirations and I truly believe that you will pull yourself out of this struggle...Struggling is a good thing because it means you're still fighting. You have not given up!! It means that you are human like the rest of us weak humans & this is part of your learning and you will learn from this & come out stronger than before. I'm sending you a huge HUG!!!! <3

  • lorrainequiche59
    lorrainequiche59 Posts: 900 Member
    whitpauly wrote: »
    Ok,we're all learning something new about ourselves and the way drinking can effect us,there is no failure! This is a opportunity to improve ourselves by not drinking alcohol,sometimes we slip up,sometimes we just have the heck with it attitude and give in to drinking,the important thing is that we learn something each time I think,new coping skills,new attitudes and determination,etc,@RubyRed427 I'm with you,,alcohol just makes me sick and like @joha5603 said it ages me overnight,my stomach gets wrecked and I get that that 3 am wake up anxiety/sweats no matter what if I've drank,bloody awful feeling,Yuck! Hope we all have a super,sober Sunday <3

    GREAT summary...BTW you are a very sweet & kind person!! Just sayin' <3
  • lorrainequiche59
    lorrainequiche59 Posts: 900 Member
    RubyRed427 wrote: »
    @Orphia we don't argue about alcohol. I just seethe quietly that he drinks in front of me. It's not a good way for me to cope. I have to get over the fact that other people can drink , but I cannot.

    I find it to be a lot like grieving. Every now and then something pulls me back a little from acceptance. I am closing on 18 months which is longer than I made it in previous attempts and I think a big part of it was letting go of the idea that someday I will get it under control and be able to drink responsibly. On every failed attempt, in the back of my mind I knew it wasn't permanent. This time it is. A big part of it is that I am about to enter my 60s. Older problem drinkers who still drink are at a higher risk of poor health in retirement that leads to a lower average life expectancy. It's not unusual for it to get a lot worse also.

    It is totally like grieving. Letting go of something we've depended on to cope is difficult...it is a process that is individual, but what's often been said on this thread is that we need each other to help us go through this process...we can learn from & support each other regardless of where we are individually in the process of gaining a healthier, happier life free from our dependency on alcohol.

    YES, the aging thing is a big consideration. Like you said the health consequences escalate the older we get. AND loneliness/depression in older years can lead to a drinking issue or exacerbate an existing one. So if we learn to cope in healthier ways now, it will help us in the years to come.
  • ElC_76
    ElC_76 Posts: 3,054 Member
    scott8210 wrote: »
    Six years sober today.

    I found this thread a few days ago trying to find any information about mfp ever fixing the news feed.

    I've read a number of posts and can relate to so many. It's not hard to remember waking up hungover with guilt, shame and remorse pouring off me every morning for so many years.

    I hope everyone is able to find serenity in their battles. 🙏

    Thanks, I really appreciate you input and others on here.
    I'm still going, kombucha has been my rescuer so far. When they fill the fridge with beer etc, I'm filling my kitchen fridge with kombucha, soda water and fruit.
    I feel the worse is yet to come but I'll going a day at a time. Thinking if it gets too tough I'll go for a walk or go to the gym.
    Thanku everyone for your support..xo
  • ElC_76
    ElC_76 Posts: 3,054 Member
    NormInv wrote: »
    RubyRed427 wrote: »
    Drank wine last night. Bad idea. One glass opened the door to five more. I cannot drink. I have serious problems and feel quite badly about myself today. When will I learn? Day 1 and mad at myself for this horrible hangover I caused. 😕

    In the same boat....I cant drink....therefore the only choice is abstinence

    Day 16 done and dusted

    Me 2. I'm glad I'm not the only one.
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    ElC_76 wrote: »
    scott8210 wrote: »
    Six years sober today.

    I found this thread a few days ago trying to find any information about mfp ever fixing the news feed.

    I've read a number of posts and can relate to so many. It's not hard to remember waking up hungover with guilt, shame and remorse pouring off me every morning for so many years.

    I hope everyone is able to find serenity in their battles. 🙏

    Thanks, I really appreciate you input and others on here.
    I'm still going, kombucha has been my rescuer so far. When they fill the fridge with beer etc, I'm filling my kitchen fridge with kombucha, soda water and fruit.
    I feel the worse is yet to come but I'll going a day at a time. Thinking if it gets too tough I'll go for a walk or go to the gym.
    Thanku everyone for your support..xo

    @ElC_76 That's a great plan to do some exercise if it gets difficult!
  • ElC_76
    ElC_76 Posts: 3,054 Member
    edited December 2018
    Orphia wrote: »
    ElC_76 wrote: »
    scott8210 wrote: »
    Six years sober today.

    I found this thread a few days ago trying to find any information about mfp ever fixing the news feed.

    I've read a number of posts and can relate to so many. It's not hard to remember waking up hungover with guilt, shame and remorse pouring off me every morning for so many years.

    I hope everyone is able to find serenity in their battles. 🙏

    Thanks, I really appreciate you input and others on here.
    I'm still going, kombucha has been my rescuer so far. When they fill the fridge with beer etc, I'm filling my kitchen fridge with kombucha, soda water and fruit.
    I feel the worse is yet to come but I'll going a day at a time. Thinking if it gets too tough I'll go for a walk or go to the gym.
    Thanku everyone for your support..xo

    @ElC_76 That's a great plan to do some exercise if it gets difficult!

    Thanku :)

    Also while I was out shopping I came across these inspiring calendars.. :D

    dvnskrfaasfr.jpg

    Some more ideas when in trouble..
  • mbaker566
    mbaker566 Posts: 11,233 Member
    hugs for everyone
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    edited December 2018
    joha5603 wrote: »

    Eek, you misunderstood! I was agreeing with you! Your 3am experience description sounded awful and that you regretted drinking, plus your dilemma over wanting more.

    I agree it was a success. I love your posts and your progress.

    We're good. :) I'm too happy to be snarky. Wishing us all the best today!
    [/quote]

    Yay! Thanks. :)

  • scott8210
    scott8210 Posts: 13 Member
    I posted my story on my feed yesterday; what life with alcohol was like before, what changed and what it's been like after. Feel free to add me if you'd like to read it. Hope everyone is having a great Monday so far!
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    edited December 2018
    A recent thought.

    When you drink to celebrate, or when you don't drink, you still need to spend 99.9% of the time enjoying the moment.

    The act of drinking (putting a glass to your lips) isn't really the celebration.