Chuck Norris

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Replies

  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck Norris's calendar goes from March 31st straight to April 2nd. No one fools Chuck Norris.
  • cee134
    cee134 Posts: 33,711 Member
    SnackherBarrell wrote: »
    Chuck Norris once picked an orange out of an apple tree and then made the best damn lemonade ever tasted

    The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
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  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive. The zombies do.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck Norris is the only person that can punch a cyclops between the eye.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck Norris plays Russian roulette with a fully loaded revolver... and wins.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck Norris beat Halo 1, 2, and 3 on Legendary with a broken Guitar Hero controller.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris' PC will crash.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck Norris narrates Morgan Freeman's life.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    There once was a street called Chuck Norris, but the name was changed for public safety because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
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  • cpegasus01
    cpegasus01 Posts: 400 Member
    Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone
  • cpegasus01
    cpegasus01 Posts: 400 Member
    While learning CPR Chuck Norris actually brought the practice dummy to life.
  • Don_WM_
    Don_WM_ Posts: 262 Member
    No one knows what is behind Chuck Norris because even nothing cannot get behind him.
  • cpegasus01
    cpegasus01 Posts: 400 Member
    Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet.
    The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.

    Big foot claims he saw Chuck Norris.

    When Chuck Norris enters into a courtroom, the judge stands up
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck can divide by zero.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck Norris can draw a square with only 3 lines.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    Chuck Norris can text message with tin can telephones.
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