Selfie psychology

Just_Mel_
Just_Mel_ Posts: 3,992 Member
edited November 28 in Chit-Chat
Why do we selfie? Do we feel good about ourselves and want someone to validate that feeling? Or do we feel crappy and selfie to make ourselves feel better? Remember when getting autographs from famous people was a thing? Now we must selfie with them if we meet one. Do you get embarrassed taking a selfie in front of others or do you just snap that pic zero effs given? Filters? Do you judge others for posting selfies?

I'm curious how this whole selfie culture came to be such a huge thing.
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Replies

  • mbaker566
    mbaker566 Posts: 11,233 Member
    just checking in with friends. also that running isn't torture, or hey check out my make up skills, or aerial skills.
  • SwannySez
    SwannySez Posts: 5,860 Member
    I was told that if I didn't post a selfie then I got no nudes. So I posted selfies. The nudes ROLLED in. Now it's a vicious circle. Post a selfie. Check the in-box. *kitten*. Rinse and repeat.
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    This content has been removed.
  • iMago
    iMago Posts: 8,714 Member
    i think it can be for whatever you want it to be.
    or if you feel pretty and want to show off.
    or if you feel ugly and need to feel pretty.

    mostly, it boils down to validation.
    which isn't is as bad as it sounds imo.
    you've just got to know within yourself why you're needing that validation and not lie to yourself about it.

    i suppose you could say that, online, at least, selfies are good as far as letting people know who they are talking to, as a matter of "verification", though i think that could also still fall under validation too.

    personally, i don't really care much why someone else posts them, or how.
    they can use a lot of filters if they want.
    if they're someone i cared to see more of without the filters i could just tell them you know?
    and if i don't tell them then i don't overly care.
  • jjpptt2
    jjpptt2 Posts: 5,650 Member
    edited September 2018
    For the attention that they [hopefully] bring.
  • Bullet_with_Butterfly_Wings
    Bullet_with_Butterfly_Wings Posts: 5,545 Member
    I don't take selfies alone if there are tonnes of people around as it feels awkward. But I will not hesitate if I'm taking it with someone or a group of people.... I'm not sure posting a million selfies a day on social media equals self confidence...
  • jjpptt2
    jjpptt2 Posts: 5,650 Member
    Bullet_with_Butterfly_Wings wrote: »
    I don't take selfies alone if there are tonnes of people around as it feels awkward. But I will not hesitate if I'm taking it with someone or a group of people.... I'm not sure posting a million selfies a day on social media equals self confidence...

    Quite possibly the opposite.
  • Just_Mel_
    Just_Mel_ Posts: 3,992 Member
    I don't even like people driving by seeing me selfie on my front porch. 🤣
  • Just_Mel_
    Just_Mel_ Posts: 3,992 Member
    If my hair looks good, I'll post a selfie.

    My old college roommate used to have this saying whenever she dressed nice and look cute she'd say, "I look good. I need to go somewhere." Like she needed people to witness her cuteness in order for it to not be wasted.

    Selfie-ing is now my version of I look cute, now I need to go somewhere.
  • Motorsheen
    Motorsheen Posts: 20,508 Member
    My handlers, P.R. head & security team lead have all advised me aginst posting selfies.



    They all seem to be concerned about stalkers from the American Upper Midwest or the East Coast of Australia.
  • iMago
    iMago Posts: 8,714 Member
    Avocado_AS5 wrote: »
    I don't even like people driving by seeing me selfie on my front porch. 🤣

    i sat in the walmart parking lot in my pickup taking one and recording a video for someone for like 20 mins this past saturday morning.
    i didn't really worry too much about anybody looking at me though...like, even if someone doesn't take a bunch of selfies i'm sure they do something else equally as worthless with their own time you know? so who cares
  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
    Avocado_AS5 wrote: »
    I don't even like people driving by seeing me selfie on my front porch. 🤣

    It’s funny, I can do videos while shopping or whatever and not feel weird, but if someone busts me cheesing for a selfie I get so embarrassed
  • Just_Mel_
    Just_Mel_ Posts: 3,992 Member
    DeadliftsAndSprinkles wrote: »
    Avocado_AS5 wrote: »
    Why do we selfie? Do we feel good about ourselves and want someone to validate that feeling? Or do we feel crappy and selfie to make ourselves feel better? Remember when getting autographs from famous people was a thing? Now we must selfie with them if we meet one. Do you get embarrassed taking a selfie in front of others or do you just snap that pic zero effs given? Filters? Do you judge others for posting selfies?

    I'm curious how this whole selfie culture came to be such a huge thing.

    For me it depends on the day. Sometimes I feel good about myself and I want to own that feeling and other days I feel *kitten* about the way that I look so a compliment goes a long way.

    I used to generally only selfie with filters but now if I post one I try my hardest to not even go there. If I'm going to get a compliment or a criticism I want it to be about the real me, not a "better" version of me. But even doing that is hard, because I feel far less confident taking a normal photo of myself.

    I don't judge people if I see them taking a selfie but if someone were to spot me while taking one I'd feel embarrassed about it, even though I don't think there's anything inherently wrong with it. Really, the only thing that I don't like is when someone has taken a selfie with a filter/altered it, but then they deny doing so. I think by having so many people who do that, it warps other peoples' expectations of beauty.


    I also think heavy filters mess with our heads and may make us think we aren't good enough without butterfly filters and air brushing.

    I've also made a conscious effort to try and not use filters. Maybe adjust brightness and contrast some, but keep my imperfections visible.
    (don't judge me by my profile pic tho, that shiz is definitely filtered!)
  • Mean_Spice
    Mean_Spice Posts: 279 Member
    The camera and I have a hate hate relationship. I hate to have my picture taken and the camera feels that same way. Besides, pictures can be used as evidence in the future.

  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
    denny_mac wrote: »
    I've given this some thought lately. I used to post selfies, and didn't really think much about it aside from just the pleasure I got from the interaction with other users. Then it also did turn into this weird validation seeking thing. I will still on occasion post one if it's something like an imitation / recreation, or if it's a "hey, see if you can post one of yourself doing ... this" kind of thread. idk. for some reason that makes it feel less "thirsty" for me. But is it, really? Maybe not. In a way I feel like a recovering addict, and if I stay away from "the" selfie thread then I get to keep my sobriety. The other "novelty" selfie threads are tantamount to a non-alcoholic drink, in my mind at least.

    The bottom line though, for me is that I am loathe to post one "just because" in that main thread. Because I think it reminds me of a time when I felt like I needed the validation of strangers, and I didn't like that version of myself very much.

    Would I be embarrassed to take a selfie in front of a bunch of people? idk. I guess it would depend on the context. If it was a meeting with a celebrity that I wanted to capture, then no. If it was just me alone in the middle of a public arena for no other reason than I was capturing what I looked like at that very moment, yeah, that would be embarrassing.

    Do I judge others for posting selfies? No, not usually. But have I ever? Sure. But that's probably more of a reflection of what I thought of myself when I used to post them a lot.

    Perfectly explained! I like the non-alcoholic drink analogy
  • caco_ethes
    caco_ethes Posts: 11,962 Member
    Motorsheen wrote: »
    My handlers, P.R. head & security team lead have all advised me aginst posting selfies.



    They all seem to be concerned about stalkers from the American Upper Midwest or the East Coast of Australia.

    Dis me
  • tinak33
    tinak33 Posts: 9,883 Member
    denny_mac wrote: »
    I've given this some thought lately. I used to post selfies, and didn't really think much about it aside from just the pleasure I got from the interaction with other users. Then it also did turn into this weird validation seeking thing. I will still on occasion post one if it's something like an imitation / recreation, or if it's a "hey, see if you can post one of yourself doing ... this" kind of thread. idk. for some reason that makes it feel less "thirsty" for me. But is it, really? Maybe not. In a way I feel like a recovering addict, and if I stay away from "the" selfie thread then I get to keep my sobriety. The other "novelty" selfie threads are tantamount to a non-alcoholic drink, in my mind at least.

    The bottom line though, for me is that I am loathe to post one "just because" in that main thread. Because I think it reminds me of a time when I felt like I needed the validation of strangers, and I didn't like that version of myself very much.

    Would I be embarrassed to take a selfie in front of a bunch of people? idk. I guess it would depend on the context. If it was a meeting with a celebrity that I wanted to capture, then no. If it was just me alone in the middle of a public arena for no other reason than I was capturing what I looked like at that very moment, yeah, that would be embarrassing.

    Do I judge others for posting selfies? No, not usually. But have I ever? Sure. But that's probably more of a reflection of what I thought of myself when I used to post them a lot.


    A lot of this is how I am as well.

    I spent a lot of years caring about what other people thought of me, and trying to be whatever everyone else wanted/needed.
    With selfies, it was just another form of getting validation that I am appealing to others, or that others like/appreciate how I look. I am just taking pics of myself for attention. It's superficial but hits on a deep level. So I avoid it to an extent. I might take selfies for specific people, and send it to them alone, but not on a forum. I think I did a few in the past, but felt myself getting so hung up on any and all responses (Or lack of responses) that I needed to stop. It stresses me out... haha

    I rarely even update my fb profile pic. I think I do one every few months.... or less.
  • mustacheU2Lift
    mustacheU2Lift Posts: 5,844 Member
    I only selfie if something is going on or I feel pretty. I stay away from it when I feel gross. My oldness is setting in so it's my last few good selfies I can squeeze in.
  • SwannySez
    SwannySez Posts: 5,860 Member
    mustacheU2Lift wrote: »
    I only selfie if something is going on or I feel pretty. I stay away from it when I feel gross. My oldness is setting in so it's my last few good selfies I can squeeze in.

    I figure you got like 4 or 5 left before we have to shoot you. Make 'em count.
  • jjonescreative
    jjonescreative Posts: 7 Member
    Don’t really do them. However don’t mind if others do it sparingly. Guys are allowed like one selfie a year.
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    edited September 2018
    This content has been removed.
  • jjpptt2
    jjpptt2 Posts: 5,650 Member
    I can usually feel when my ego needs a little kick in the *kitten*... and those are the days I'm more apt to post selfies and/or seek out random threads I can participate in that I wouldn't otherwise.

    So for me, it's 99.9% to get attention. But not all attention is created (received) equally, so sometimes it ends up just making things worse.
  • mustacheU2Lift
    mustacheU2Lift Posts: 5,844 Member
    SwannySez wrote: »
    mustacheU2Lift wrote: »
    I only selfie if something is going on or I feel pretty. I stay away from it when I feel gross. My oldness is setting in so it's my last few good selfies I can squeeze in.

    I figure you got like 4 or 5 left before we have to shoot you. Make 'em count.

    Ugh...pull out the gun...just wasted my last 5
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