Very stupid question.
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psychod787 wrote: »LivingtheLeanDream wrote: »Its not a stupid question OP. Are you still fairly new to maintenance?
Only a year in... still learning... I will always be learning. Actually, I keep saying I am going to try and gain some back. I let bf get too low, sub 10. I was a binge eater... well recovering. I have not had an episode in a long while. I just used to eat until stuffed, so all I ever knew was hungry or stuff. Never learned sated.
I think we are always learning. If you've not had a binge in a long while it sounds like you are winning. I think with time you will learn to be sated naturally. I'm 5yrs at maintenance, still learning, still tweaking but after year 2 I did learn satiety, I suppose that might have because it was habit? it comes naturally now.
{{Hugs}}
Ruth4 -
cmriverside wrote: »I had to figure out my Maintenance cals and then split it up into two larger meals. I like the full feeling too.
Two meals plus a small (200-300cal) snack seems to work best for me.
I know intellectually that's enough food. Like I said in the "psych" thread, I will eat my larger meals and then wait for 20 minutes. That's how long it takes to get that message to my brain that I've eaten enough. If I don't eat more (I usually still want to) within that 20 minutes I find I'm fine at the end of that 20 minutes.
It's about knowing over time that I'm getting the right amount of food for my weight - then trusting it.
wow, I'm the exact same!!3 -
CarvedTones wrote: »jamesjeffsmith wrote: »No massive amount of food feels as good as fit feels
For a lot (most?) of us, a binge rarely feels good. I was often disgusted with myself while eating, not just after.
Agreed. It still happens sometimes - usually if I've added alcohol into the equation. I log it and move on1 -
I struggle with this too. So, I just decided that unless it's meal time (and I've been observing meal times that day with no snacks) or my stomach is growling with hunger then I'm not hungry and hence must be satisfied. The only meal I tend to overeat is dinner and binges are always at night. I'm too busy during the day, so I'm lucky in knowing how many calories I have left for and after dinner.1
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Just as an aside, my wife says "you're weird". I would sneeze repeatedly when gorged. I was obese nearly 10 years. Since I've lost the weight and been in maintenance, I never get full to that point where I sneeze. Maybe a handful of times. Used to be a daily occurrence. I know that's odd but for me, no sneezing and I'm good.8
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MikePfirrman wrote: »Just as an aside, my wife says "you're weird". I would sneeze repeatedly when gorged. I was obese nearly 10 years. Since I've lost the weight and been in maintenance, I never get full to that point where I sneeze. Maybe a handful of times. Used to be a daily occurrence. I know that's odd but for me, no sneezing and I'm good.
Well, that's a new one!
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VanVanDiane wrote: »CarvedTones wrote: »jamesjeffsmith wrote: »No massive amount of food feels as good as fit feels
For a lot (most?) of us, a binge rarely feels good. I was often disgusted with myself while eating, not just after.
Agreed. It still happens sometimes - usually if I've added alcohol into the equation. I log it and move on
That's one of the reasons I removed alcohol from every equation 458 days ago (but who's counting?). Not the most important one, but definitely one of the reasons. Eating disorders are usually a symptom, not a root cause. The root cause is something I couldn't fix with alcohol (I did extensive testing to confirm this).15 -
Sometimes I have to look at it academically, did I have enough calories for today and what I've done, so is that actually hunger or am I just wanting to eat because I want to? I'll give it twenty minutes and drink some water and distract myself and check in again. If still hungry I'll look at my macros and see if I am short somewhere and try to tailor a snack to that. So to answer, no I guess I don't know what it really feels like.2
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This is something you have to learn. I have learned to pay really careful attention to how I feel later. I know that when I eat until I am full I feel gross later. If I eat until I am stuffed I feel really sick.
I focus a lot on the enjoyable qualities of food. I also try really hard to eat delicious food. In general I find the more I pay attention to my eating and the better it tastes, the LESS I eat. I am looking for satisfaction and stimulation in food. Lousy food doesn't give me that. Good food does.
I am told that in Japan you are taught to eat until you are half full and then stop. This works for me. At that point I start sipping my tea or chatting or playing with my salad or reading the paper. I might grab an olive or something. I SPECIFICALLY put small gnoshy things on the table so I can nibble without really eating much. I will find over the next half an hour or so I feel fuller and fuller and fuller. If I feel motivated to eat after an hour I'll definitely eat more.
So my answer is mindfulness. Teach yourself this. It really is worth learning and you can do it!2 -
xbowhunter wrote: »One time on a cruise ship I did hypnosis for weight loss. They kept saying over and over to listen to your body and as soon as your full stop eating. It worked great for about 2 weeks> my take away from that is the signals are there if you let them in to your physical side....
Insert sound of needle skipping off record. Weight loss....on a cruise ship? That’s a complete oxymoron.2 -
xbowhunter wrote: »One time on a cruise ship I did hypnosis for weight loss. They kept saying over and over to listen to your body and as soon as your full stop eating. It worked great for about 2 weeks> my take away from that is the signals are there if you let them in to your physical side....
Insert sound of needle skipping off record. Weight loss....on a cruise ship? That’s a complete oxymoron.
Thats true actually because I've also been on many cruises and have seen weight loss courses etc on the ships daily itinerary, hilarious eh1 -
I have to track and measure everything I consume. This is because I never feel full unless I am completely stuffed. And then if I am completely stuffed for some reason I will feel hungry again within fifteen minutes. I can't afford to listen to my body or my feeling of satiation.
I have to work this with my brain. If I hit my calories I'm done, that's it.
My whole overweight extended family is the same way. We call it our defective gene and have talked about it many times. It's all about control and I am in control of what I eat. By the way both in deficit and now recently in maintenance I have not exceeded my daily calorie target even once in 2018.11 -
LivingtheLeanDream wrote: »psychod787 wrote: »LivingtheLeanDream wrote: »Its not a stupid question OP. Are you still fairly new to maintenance?
Only a year in... still learning... I will always be learning. Actually, I keep saying I am going to try and gain some back. I let bf get too low, sub 10. I was a binge eater... well recovering. I have not had an episode in a long while. I just used to eat until stuffed, so all I ever knew was hungry or stuff. Never learned sated.
I think we are always learning. If you've not had a binge in a long while it sounds like you are winning. I think with time you will learn to be sated naturally. I'm 5yrs at maintenance, still learning, still tweaking but after year 2 I did learn satiety, I suppose that might have because it was habit? it comes naturally now.
{{Hugs}}
Ruth
I second this. Just about 3 years of maintenance for me, and I'm still learning and troubleshooting. In the end, we fix what we can fix about ourselves, but we are still "who we are." Sometimes that takes some clever thinking to deal with.I have to track and measure everything I consume. This is because I never feel full unless I am completely stuffed. And then if I am completely stuffed for some reason I will feel hungry again within fifteen minutes. I can't afford to listen to my body or my feeling of satiation.
I have to work this with my brain. If I hit my calories I'm done, that's it.
My whole overweight extended family is the same way. We call it our defective gene and have talked about it many times. It's all about control and I am in control of what I eat. By the way both in deficit and now recently in maintenance I have not exceeded my daily calorie target even once in 2018.
we may be related...
This is me as well. I still have to do this. My body prefers to feel uncomfortably full. If I'm not feeling like my stomach might split open soon, then it throws a fit. I have to take over and call "nonsense." I know myself and the bullcrap my brain likes to pull in that regard, so I've set up structure and limits. It's a PITA to have to forever be so obsessive with what I put in my mouth, but left to my "feelz" of satiety...that's just asking for me to regain. I refuse. So I do what I have to. My husband makes fun of me with the food scale hokey pokey all the time. So I ask him if he'd rather have the "old me" back in all my rotundity. He's pretty emphatic in his answer.
He clearly doesn't have the gene we have. He just can't understand.
It's tiring sometimes. We're winning though.
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baconslave wrote: »LivingtheLeanDream wrote: »psychod787 wrote: »LivingtheLeanDream wrote: »Its not a stupid question OP. Are you still fairly new to maintenance?
Only a year in... still learning... I will always be learning. Actually, I keep saying I am going to try and gain some back. I let bf get too low, sub 10. I was a binge eater... well recovering. I have not had an episode in a long while. I just used to eat until stuffed, so all I ever knew was hungry or stuff. Never learned sated.
I think we are always learning. If you've not had a binge in a long while it sounds like you are winning. I think with time you will learn to be sated naturally. I'm 5yrs at maintenance, still learning, still tweaking but after year 2 I did learn satiety, I suppose that might have because it was habit? it comes naturally now.
{{Hugs}}
Ruth
I second this. Just about 3 years of maintenance for me, and I'm still learning and troubleshooting. In the end, we fix what we can fix about ourselves, but we are still "who we are." Sometimes that takes some clever thinking to deal with.I have to track and measure everything I consume. This is because I never feel full unless I am completely stuffed. And then if I am completely stuffed for some reason I will feel hungry again within fifteen minutes. I can't afford to listen to my body or my feeling of satiation.
I have to work this with my brain. If I hit my calories I'm done, that's it.
My whole overweight extended family is the same way. We call it our defective gene and have talked about it many times. It's all about control and I am in control of what I eat. By the way both in deficit and now recently in maintenance I have not exceeded my daily calorie target even once in 2018.
we may be related...
This is me as well. I still have to do this. My body prefers to feel uncomfortably full. If I'm not feeling like my stomach might split open soon, then it throws a fit. I have to take over and call "nonsense." I know myself and the bullcrap my brain likes to pull in that regard, so I've set up structure and limits. It's a PITA to have to forever be so obsessive with what I put in my mouth, but left to my "feelz" of satiety...that's just asking for me to regain. I refuse. So I do what I have to. My husband makes fun of me with the food scale hokey pokey all the time. So I ask him if he'd rather have the "old me" back in all my rotundity. He's pretty emphatic in his answer.
He clearly doesn't have the gene we have. He just can't understand.
It's tiring sometimes. We're winning though.
Yeah, this is me too.
People who say, "Well just have one cookie," CLEARLY do not have the broken off switch that I was born with.
If I didn't track everything I would be gaining again. I wanted to stop tracking and be one who could eat intuitively but after eleven years at my Maintenance weight, I've conceded that isn't a thing I do. I tried, I really did. It's all in my head? Not really. I'm compulsive in a lot of ways and have to keep it in check. A food log does that for me: I can look at it and say, "See, you've had the right amount of food." If/when I don't do that, ALL the food is the right amount.
*sigh*10 -
cmriverside wrote: »People who say, "Well just have one cookie," CLEARLY do not have the broken off switch that I was born with.
*sigh*
That's my issue too. Saving calories for a cookie or two, or a serving of ice cream just makes me miserable. Not the saving calories for a serving part, the one serving part. I'm either going to keep going back for another serving until the container is gone, or I'm going to be stressed and unhappy resisting polishing off the rest of the container. Am I giving up these foods for the rest of my life? No, I'm giving up keeping them in the house where they're a constant temptation.
I had to learn this about myself, and work out the strategy as I progressed in my weight loss. Even after a couple of years of losing and more than 6 months in maintenance I still have anxiety about food in certain situations, and new things keep cropping up. I'm comfortable tracking my food and my weight, it gives me a sense of control that takes a lot of the stress out of my relationship with food, and each time a new situation comes up I know I have the tools to incorporate future occurrences into my plan in a way that's healthy for me.8 -
I personally think it's fine to feel full as long as you actually feel HUNGRY before you fill up.
Stop before you get to stuffed.3 -
cmriverside wrote: »If I didn't track everything I would be gaining again. I wanted to stop tracking and be one who could eat intuitively but after eleven years at my Maintenance weight, I've conceded that isn't a thing I do. I tried, I really did. It's all in my head? Not really. I'm compulsive in a lot of ways and have to keep it in check. A food log does that for me: I can look at it and say, "See, you've had the right amount of food." If/when I don't do that, ALL the food is the right amount.
*sigh*
Me too I've been maintaining for 7 years and I've tried stopping tracking and partially tracking but like you, I've accepted that it isn't in the cards for me. On the upside, I love all the data I have from it and being able to track how changes in my diet impact how I feel.6 -
I seriously struggle with that. I can't every say I am full. I have eaten and it be too much to the point of sick but full is hard. Satisfied is hard too. Would I mentally like more for sure. Do I know I've had enough yep. So for me I weigh and measure everything then tell myself no you don't need it. Even at goal I have to keep this up.4
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I personally think it's fine to feel full as long as you actually feel HUNGRY before you fill up.
Stop before you get to stuffed.
I wish I had that option.
I cannot feel full without feeling stuffed. I can feel ‘actually’ hungry while feeling stuffed. My physical signals are broken. Listening to broken signals is how I got morbidly obese in the first place.6 -
I have to track and measure everything I consume. This is because I never feel full unless I am completely stuffed. And then if I am completely stuffed for some reason I will feel hungry again within fifteen minutes. I can't afford to listen to my body or my feeling of satiation.
I have to work this with my brain. If I hit my calories I'm done, that's it.
My whole overweight extended family is the same way. We call it our defective gene and have talked about it many times. It's all about control and I am in control of what I eat. By the way both in deficit and now recently in maintenance I have not exceeded my daily calorie target even once in 2018.
I know exactly how you feel, I'm the same! If I listened to my body and ate till I'm satisfied, I'd probably eat 3 times more than I actually need, easily3 -
When I think / feel that I am hungry I try to establish if I actually feel "hungry" or thirsty". If it is outside of my normal eating hours it is usually "thirsty". A cuppa will do the trick then...0
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Thanks for all the great responses! I have not posted on the topic, but have been reading.0
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psychod787 wrote: »Thanks for all the great responses! I have not posted on the topic, but have been reading.
Nobody likes a post-and-runner2 -
psychod787 wrote: »Thanks for all the great responses! I have not posted on the topic, but have been reading.
Nobody likes a post-and-runner
Too old to run ma'am! I will walk away fast!🤣
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One of the suggestions I tried that was helpful is: drink a big glass of water when I first think I'm feeling hunger pangs. It was interesting how often it worked to take away the hunger pang. The source said that dehydration often mimics the feeling of hunger. Drinking enough water every day is one of my challenges; the frequent bathroom stops are what annoys me more than anything about trying to keep up.
My binge eating was typically of high fat and high sugar cookie/pie/ice cream sorts of things. As I started to make health conscious changes to my behavior, another trick I tried for a short time was to allow the binge event, BUT, limit it to the healthy foods. What that accomplished was to remove some of the guilt that followed the binge. It also made the physical discomfort less uncomfortable afterwards.
As I got better control of portions through the use of a digital food scale, and, planned my meals to be balanced across the macro targets, I found my desire to binge-eat was decreasing little by little.
good luck to you, and good fitness to us all!
amyfb
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One of the suggestions I tried that was helpful is: drink a big glass of water when I first think I'm feeling hunger pangs. It was interesting how often it worked to take away the hunger pang. The source said that dehydration often mimics the feeling of hunger. Drinking enough water every day is one of my challenges; the frequent bathroom stops are what annoys me more than anything about trying to keep up.
I've read that a lot on here. "You're mistaking hunger for thirst!" "Drink a glass of water before every meal!" Yeah, no. When I use water to deal with hunger, I end up feeling like an overfilled water balloon sloshing around and I'm even hungrier.
Drinking water can help some people deal with hunger, but others like me, it's just a sloshy and still growling stomach.
I guess sort of OT: I like to feel satisfied rather than not hungry or full. My eating is 90% mental. When I'm busy doing things where I can't eat, I can get by.4
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