Mediocre body

ellioc2

Is anyone else annoyed at how hard they have to work to just have a mediocre body? I know it’s about the small changes and consistent effort, but sometimes I look in the mirror and am like why even bother anymore. Sorry if this is rant-y or depressing, I’ve just been extra hangry today and annoyed I don’t look better for how hard I’m working at this.

RunsWithBees

I’m not sure what a mediocre body is, but how long have you been counting calories/exercising?

AnvilHead

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Too many people are hung up on comparing themselves against the perfectly-lighted, made-up, airbrushed, strategically posed people they see on Instagram or in magazines. Even those people themselves don't walk around looking like that on an everyday basis.

Each of us has what we have, according to our genetics, and much of it can't be changed. Strive to be the best you that you can possibly be, rather than comparing yourself against somebody else.

siobhanaoife

ellioc2 wrote: »

I’m getting results technically but when I look in the mirror I only see what’s wrong with my body, not what’s right.

Friend, what you describe is not a problem with your body. It's a problem with perception, negative self-talk, probably wounded self-image. You're working on making your body healthier and more functional and more beautiful - and this often stirs up the emotional and/or mental baggage that isn't fixed by losing weight and getting in shape.

Some kind attention to your thoughts and feelings might help more right now than bearing down harder on the diet and exercise.

RunsWithBees

ellioc2 wrote: »

monkeefan1974 wrote: »

I’m not sure what a mediocre body is, but how long have you been counting calories/exercising?

About 2 1/2 months now. 1200-1400 calories a day, gym 2-3 times a week. I’m getting results technically but when I look in the mirror I only see what’s wrong with my body, not what’s right.

Patience is key! It took me 10 months to lose weight but about 2 years for my skin to adapt and about 3 years of consistent exercise to really feel somewhat toned and completely confident about my body. I’m in my 40’s but have a better body than I did in my 20’s in my opinion but what really gives me confidence is what my body is capable of, what it looks like is secondary. My advice is to concentrate on good health and strength and the “looking better” will follow but realize it will take time. In the meantime find a physical activity/exercise that you really like and it won’t feel like “work” if you really enjoy doing it. Try different activities, for me I found my passion for trail running and haven’t looked back since. I don’t think about it as a workout, it’s kinda like my hobby/lifestyle that just happens to keep me fit. Good luck on your journey!

apullum

What’s a mediocre body? As far as I’m concerned, a body that is able to do things I want to do is a pretty wonderful body.

Also, what are your goals? Most fitness related goals take a lot of time to achieve.

sardelsa

What do you mean by mediocre body? As mentioned, results take time. I would be lying if I said I didn't get frustrated as well. I have been lifting and running muscle gaining cycles for over 4 years now (which to be honest isn't that much time) and I do get irritated with how much work is involved for such small changes. When clothed, I don't look that different from other women my age around me, most of the time I feel like I look pretty regular. But it is what it is!

kdz526

Patience is a virtue. I would be fine with a mediocre body after being overweight/obese most of my life
I have accepted I won't have big boobs and a skinny butt like my best friend, but I have a tiny waist compared to her and curves in the hip/butt area that she does not have. Some of it is just accepting and loving the build you are and trying to be best YOU you can be.

StephNicole2018

I completely understand what you mean. I often few the same and have been trying to work through. Funny thing is I feel it more now that I have lost some weight and toned up a bit. I agree with others that are saying it’s more a mind/perception issue than with your actually body. I have tried to read up on body positivity, self love, compassion and confidence which has helped some. Just please remember you can’t negative self talk or punish yourself into improvement.

hesn92

I try not to be so focused on what my body looks like. My body is wonderful for all the things it can do, therefore I exercise and eat pretty healthy to take care of it. Not so it will look a certain way.

aortegasep

Agree with all previous comments. Focus on been healthier and happier.
I'm 40 and decided to have a healthier life/body. I understand perfectly how you feel as lately I look in to mirror and see a guy who spent last 20 years eating and gaining weight instead of becoming fit.
But, then I remember my self that same mirror guy has decided to invest time and effort, not to be in a fit contest nor to be popular, but to have a better future life with a stronger and healtier body.

amy19355

OP: if you want to use photos to assess your physical self, I'd suggest the following:
1. solid color spandex is going to provide a more 'truthful' picture. (prints, and loose garments distract)
2. get someone else to take the photo so that you can adopt a consistent and good-form posture intended for progress evaluations.
3. define your goals more clearly - I have no idea how to address "mediocre" with diet or exercise advice.

good luck to you.

sardelsa

I think you look great OP, but you have to feel good about yourself. Also keep in mind patience will be key when it comes to body changes. Just losing weight, even with exercise may not get you there in one go.

vanmep

Mediocre body??? What does that mean? I assume you are referring to appearances? Just give a little consideration to what an incredible miracle and mystery that body of yours is! It carries you through the day and makes all of your experiences in this world possible. Don’t you be calling that mediocre! 😳

Barfly57

I can't see anything wrong.

tulips_and_tea

OP, what exactly would you like to see in the mirror? What we want isn't always attainable but if you know your goal you can start making a few changes (different workout routine or whatever). But keep in mind that what we "see" in the mirror isn't always a true representation of how we look to others. The mind can be tricky at times.

mom23mangos

I think you have a very cute physique, but I can understand you wanting to get back to where you felt comfortable. Honestly, 30lbs can make a BIG difference. I just think you need some more patience. 2.5 months is not very long. It probably took you years to get to where you were. Building a physique you are happy with can take years as well. If you think of it as a long game, I think you will not feel as frustrated. And I urge you to continue taking progress photos because sometimes you can't see the change in the mirror, but when you compare to where you started you can see your hard work pay off.

AmyC2288

FWIW your "mediocre" body is someone else's goal body. Not trying to down play how you're feeling- just giving a little bit of perspective. Try being kinder to yourself- we are our own harshest critics!

apullum

ellioc2 wrote: »

BZAH10 wrote: »

OP, what exactly would you like to see in the mirror? What we want isn't always attainable but if you know your goal you can start making a few changes (different workout routine or whatever). But keep in mind that what we "see" in the mirror isn't always a true representation of how we look to others. The mind can be tricky at times.

I want thinner arms, a completely flat stomach, a small waist, and to be about 30 pounds slimmer. I don’t mind having thicker thighs and bigger hips but I don’t want to be boxy and flabby like I am now. I have this photo of myself 5-6 years ago where I really liked how I looked, I’m trying to get to around there again

It's important to have realistic expectations.

We can't control where on the body fat is burned from. If you lose 30 pounds, that fat might come from your arms or waist, or it might not. You can develop muscle in these areas, but there's no guarantee that you'll lose fat in any particular place.

It's very common for women to not have completely flat stomachs, in part due to the tilt of the uterus. This is true even if your stomach used to be flatter, since our bodies change with age. See this thread: https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10689837/does-this-uterus-make-my-stomach-look-fat/p1

I don't think you ever mentioned your current height and weight. If you are already in an ideal BMI range for your height, then I would strongly recommend recomp rather than focusing on weight loss.

tulips_and_tea

If you do have 30 lbs left to lose then you will see substantial differences at that point. I know it's hard to remember how we looked at one time and felt great and then for whatever reason things change. But, since you were there once and happy with yourself you can certainly do it again! Every day moves us one more step forward to our goal. Just keep moving forward.

collectingblues

ellioc2 wrote: »

BZAH10 wrote: »

OP, what exactly would you like to see in the mirror? What we want isn't always attainable but if you know your goal you can start making a few changes (different workout routine or whatever). But keep in mind that what we "see" in the mirror isn't always a true representation of how we look to others. The mind can be tricky at times.

I want thinner arms, a completely flat stomach, a small waist, and to be about 30 pounds slimmer. I don’t mind having thicker thighs and bigger hips but I don’t want to be boxy and flabby like I am now. I have this photo of myself 5-6 years ago where I really liked how I looked, I’m trying to get to around there again

How old are you in that older picture? Because you look pretty young in both, regardless, and if that was in your late teens/early 20s, it's possible that you just grew into a woman's body, and you're not going to look like a teenager/early-20-person again.

Edit: And, since you have a history of eating disorders, it's also likely and possible that that body you had before wasn't a healthy body for you. Striving to hit the body you had with an eating disorder, or while actively in ED recovery is NOT a good goal.