60 yrs and up

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  • MargaretYakoda
    MargaretYakoda Posts: 1,944 Member
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    Drive-by check-in. Met with the oncologist yesterday. Wife's blood chemistry is good/normal now, but she is not fighting to get stronger. She said to the doctor, "This old gal is wearing out." I'm concerned that she is just going to give up. She is not doing the needed physical therapy. She's not long for this earth if she doesn't improve her general physical condition. 😟

    Regardless, trying to take care of myself, too. Still walking with the dog. Two gym workouts this week. Keeping the diet under control and not drinking too much.

    Appreciate all the kind words, everyone. Thank you.

    Good to hear from you, Steve! I empathize with your situation, and your wife's. I don't want to intrude, but have they suggested any medication or other types of intervention on the more psychological side of things? A certain amount of depression or anxiety comes with the cancer diagnosis, of course. Some of that is for obvious reasons, but there's also some speculation that mood/attitude may be affected at the biochemical level during the cancer experience as well. Good nutrition is a plus on that side of things, for sure, if you/she can get her there, but other things can be useful. I'm far from the only person I know who used some medication during treatment to help with that sort of thing, though it hasn't been common in my life under other conditions.

    On another front, personally, I found professional massage very helpful physically, and that has the plus of being enjoyable and basically passive. There can be some limitations on the modality during treatment, but a good MT can work within the guidance doctors offer. I don't know whether that would appeal to her, be affordable as a complementary therapy - just a thought.

    Sounds like you're doing good things for yourself, still, and that'll be good for her as well (to see, and of course for you to keep your own tank a little more topped up as a caregiver).

    Sending strength and well-wishes to you both!

    Thanks for the suggestions, Ann. She is taking an antidepressant (and has taken various types for years). But that was combined with excessive drinking at times - not a good situation - led to some erratic behavior. No drinking now, though, so that's one less contributor to depression. She was also a daily marijuana user, but no smoking now. Uses edible forms as desired, though - that does seem to elevate the mood. I use them, too, now and then. It does help to reduce my stress level.

    I'll suggest the massage option to her. She might go for that. I've tried the direct approach to encourage exercise, but all I hear are excuses about why it can't be done.

    We have found that having joints available for my husband to use at will has helped keep his mood elevated too.
    He hadn’t (as far as I knew) smoked pot since coming back from Vietnam.

    But the dementia he has definitely changed his personality. It’s vascular dementia. A result of strokes. So part of who he was is literally gone.

    He had been a black belt. Calm, cool in a crisis. Always athletic. Taught classes. Was a judge numerous times at the Nationals in Vegas. Everyone loved him.

    Then ZAP! He is easily irritated. Quick to want to throw a punch. Over imagined things.

    God. Bless. Cannabis.

    That’s all I have to say about it.
  • trekkie123
    trekkie123 Posts: 230 Member
    I am new...looking to become healthy, happy, and live in peace with myself

    Good luck on your journey!
  • ArmindaJoanna
    ArmindaJoanna Posts: 14 Member
    I am new...looking to become healthy, happy, and live in peace with myself

    Me too! You can and I will also!
  • richum1960
    richum1960 Posts: 43 Member
    I am new...looking to become healthy, happy, and live in peace with myself

    Welcome! You have came to the right place.
  • annliz23
    annliz23 Posts: 2,442 Member
    edited August 2021
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    Let's have a great day everyone!
  • MargaretYakoda
    MargaretYakoda Posts: 1,944 Member
    edited August 2021
    annliz23 wrote: »
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    Let's have a great day everyone!

    I might. But it’s midnight here.
    :D

    Time to get another 45 minutes on my NuStep and watch some Greys Anatomy!
    WHOO!
  • tnh2o
    tnh2o Posts: 146 Member
    If you can manage a trip to the Len Foote Hike Inn in north Georgia I highly recommend it. It's a 5 mile hike just to get there but once you are there it is so peaceful. I hiked over to Springer Mountain, the southern terminus of the Appalachian Trail. I have wanted to do that for a long time. Hiked out in the pouring rain (kind of liked that), decided I hated my boots but hate my pack more; so time for some new gear. It's past time to lose some weight (I did so well last year but then....) and get in better shape. The KEY is to track. Ugh.
  • richum1960
    richum1960 Posts: 43 Member
    Hello all, another Canuck newbie in your midst!
    I am 61, been yoyo overweight (but ever increasing) since I had my babies in my twenties...so that's lame. Tried so many approaches at weightless. Gearing myself up again.

    I retired earlier this year vs total breakdown or heart attack - I had been working flat out under extremely stressful conditions throughout the pandemic, which added a good (not at all good) 50 lbs, year over year.

    Now damn close to 300 lbs and not nearly tall enough :) ... pretty despairing but yet not quite desperate enough apparently...I retired with the goal of regaining my health; emotional, mental, spiritual and physical, and I now finally feel ready for the babiest of steps towards weight management.

    I am very, very sedentary - part of my rebellion against working is binge-watching as missed that stage of the pandemic + happily rediscovering my love of reading. My only stated plans upon retirement were to satisfy my pandemic FOMO: wear only yoga pants or leggings (I have added jean shorts), genuinely be confused as to what day it is, the aforementioned binge-watching, get my mail in PJs!
    Mission accomplished!

    So I downloaded this app a few days ago and started tracking food. I am also tracking water which went from what I needed to use to swallow a pill to 4 glasses a day, so that's something. Actually 2 somethings lol.

    Today made my way to the forums and here I am! Hello 👋

    Welcome! Many others and I have found great success here. Have a great day!
  • richum1960
    richum1960 Posts: 43 Member
    tnh2o wrote: »
    If you can manage a trip to the Len Foote Hike Inn in north Georgia I highly recommend it. It's a 5 mile hike just to get there but once you are there it is so peaceful. I hiked over to Springer Mountain, the southern terminus of the Appalachian Trail. I have wanted to do that for a long time. Hiked out in the pouring rain (kind of liked that), decided I hated my boots but hate my pack more; so time for some new gear. It's past time to lose some weight (I did so well last year but then....) and get in better shape. The KEY is to track. Ugh.

    That is so awesome! Thanks for sharing!
  • MargaretYakoda
    MargaretYakoda Posts: 1,944 Member
    edited August 2021
    annliz23 wrote: »
    Sharing but no-one needs to read I just have learned not to bottle this up. It has been a tricky year so far my husband has started showing signs of memory loss some days are good some bad but because he gets frustrated I often have to take the flack and I am aware it will only deteriorate as he gets older (71). My best friend of 35 years died this year I miss her advice , and friendship greatly.
    We went on holiday with my youngest son and grandson but youngest has always been challenging but now in his 30s he finds managing money difficult, he has a drinking problem and can be hard to talk to as he flys off the handle, I pray daily but suspect he will end up in trouble soon.
    My oldest son has a difficult time his son 6 yrs old is autistic and has sensory problems it's very draining emotionally.

    I know I need to keep being supportive but feel so worn down and tired, stress takes its toll. I am trying to focus on positive things whenever I can. Thanks for listening.

    My husband also has dementia.
    If you’re active on Facebook, and want a great support group, send me a PM.

    It’s a rocky road. I know. ❤️
    In part because so many people think they know because their parent, or a friend, etc. has or had dementia. But when it’s your spouse it’s so much harder.

    For me my rock changed to the exact opposite at the very time I needed him most. And, although we see occasional glimmers, the person I married is mostly gone.

    Editing to add: We might not be able to message each other since we’re not friends here. Let me know if you want the FB group information.