The sly/bring you back down to earth/p*ss on your parade comments
Pardyqueenxoxo
Posts: 218 Member
Does anyone else have catty comments made to them while they are trying to lose weight, get fit, maintain etc...
I have just had it today.
Bit of background - 5ft 6, 13st 7lb in Jan last year and I am now 10st 7lb (with a good diet, still allowing treats, working out hard etc) In this time I have been using the electronic Bmi and fat machines at the gym, of course this has been decreasing as time goes on...My fat today measured at 22.6% which is apparently excellent. I was still pleased with seeing this result as I have always weighed myself at the exact same time every Friday morning. Took a pic, snap chatted it and this guy (who I know as an aquaintence) replied "those machines chat S**T" and a load of laughing emojis. it wasnt even kind, not like "just be aware its not alway on the dot etc"
Fair enough they may not be amazingly accurate but I'm still much better off than I was last year! Why cant people just be happy for each other? I dont know if its jealousy, envy.....
feel free to vent here your criticisms........
I have just had it today.
Bit of background - 5ft 6, 13st 7lb in Jan last year and I am now 10st 7lb (with a good diet, still allowing treats, working out hard etc) In this time I have been using the electronic Bmi and fat machines at the gym, of course this has been decreasing as time goes on...My fat today measured at 22.6% which is apparently excellent. I was still pleased with seeing this result as I have always weighed myself at the exact same time every Friday morning. Took a pic, snap chatted it and this guy (who I know as an aquaintence) replied "those machines chat S**T" and a load of laughing emojis. it wasnt even kind, not like "just be aware its not alway on the dot etc"
Fair enough they may not be amazingly accurate but I'm still much better off than I was last year! Why cant people just be happy for each other? I dont know if its jealousy, envy.....
feel free to vent here your criticisms........
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Replies
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I don't share my weight loss or exercise with social media. I don't discuss my goals with people. That minimizes the extra commentary I might receive.17
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Well, thats the mistake I have made and it has been learnt! x10
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Well, I'll counter his comment with this: Really well done! 22 BMI is right where I am and I love it. Good work! Congratulations on your hard work.
P.S. all you need to calculate your BMI is your height and weight, so I don't what that guy was talking about. It isn't a complicated calculation that needs a trip to a chamber.1 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »I don't share my weight loss or exercise with social media. I don't discuss my goals with people. That minimizes the extra commentary I might receive.
That's fine for you but I don't think anyone should have to censor themselves or keep their mouth shut to avoid nasty comments. It's not her fault for sharing, it's this edgelord funnyman's fault for being a little *kitten*.
Delete this idiot and never think about him again.Pardyqueenxoxo wrote: »this guy (who I know as an aquaintence) replied "those machines chat S**T" and a load of laughing emojis. it wasnt even kind, not like "just be aware its not alway on the dot etc"
In general tho, it's amazing how people will tell on themselves, like what kind of petty, nasty small mind do you have to have that the first thing comes out of your mouth is mean spirited or rude? Why would anyone want to be around that? Take the hint these people are giving you and get rid.
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Meant 22.6% body fat sorry! xx3
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Chef_Barbell wrote: »I don't share my weight loss or exercise with social media. I don't discuss my goals with people. That minimizes the extra commentary I might receive.
That's fine for you but I don't think anyone should have to censor themselves or keep their mouth shut to avoid nasty comments. It's not her fault for sharing, it's this edgelord funnyman's fault for being a little *kitten*.
Delete this idiot and never think about him again.Pardyqueenxoxo wrote: »this guy (who I know as an aquaintence) replied "those machines chat S**T" and a load of laughing emojis. it wasnt even kind, not like "just be aware its not alway on the dot etc"
In general tho, it's amazing how people will tell on themselves, like what kind of petty, nasty small mind do you have to have that the first thing comes out of your mouth is mean spirited or rude? Why would anyone want to be around that? Take the hint these people are giving you and get rid.
Who said anything about censoring themselves? You share stuff online, be prepared to receive any type of response. Don't want that? Don't share. Pretty simple. 🤷🏼♀️15 -
Pardyqueenxoxo wrote: »Meant 22.6% body fat sorry! xx
Ohhhh. I need to drink coffee before replying to posts. That was my fault. Well, yeah, then. Those machines are crap.
But still - well done!
People have no filter, just don't let him ruin your day.0 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »
Who said anything about censoring themselves? You share stuff online, be prepared to receive any type of response. Don't want that? Don't share. Pretty simple. 🤷🏼♀️
Not sharing particular parts of your life on social media because you will get hateful comments is self-censorship and that's what you suggested she do.
I think people should be held to a higher standard. Especially since she knows this person in real life. You should be able to share things without being bombarded with negativity for the sake of negativity. I think you should call out that behavior when you see it and when you can. Personal rule.7 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »
Who said anything about censoring themselves? You share stuff online, be prepared to receive any type of response. Don't want that? Don't share. Pretty simple. 🤷🏼♀️
Not sharing particular parts of your life on social media because you will get hateful comments is self-censorship and that's what you suggested she do.
I think people should be held to a higher standard. Especially since she knows this person in real life. You should be able to share things without being bombarded with negativity for the sake of negativity. I think you should call out that behavior when you see it and when you can. Personal rule.
When you share things on the internet, you cannot control who responds in what way. Yes, one hopes the world would be kinder, but that's not reality. The only thing you can control is yourself. If comments bother you, then not posting is an option. Call it what you want. 🤷🏼♀️9 -
OP, some people on the internet just need to comment on things like that because they are insecure about themselves, and "showing off" their knowledge makes them feel valued. It happens all the time on health and fitness sites, where someone posts something and another person will completely ignore the main idea of the post to focus on one little comment or statement that they think is "wrong." See how valuable and knowledgeable they are?! They corrected the misinformation!
Some people never gained the wisdom to know when speaking up is helpful and when it's obnoxious, or they just don't have the social graces to understand the appropriate response in a situation. The nice thing about the internet is that in doing so, they put it all out there for everyone else to see.
Congrats on your 22.6%! I've been around that same number according to one of those machines, and even if it's not accurate, I know how dedicated you have to have been to even get that number. You should be really proud of yourself and the work you've put in.6 -
OP, some people on the internet just need to comment on things like that because they are insecure about themselves, and "showing off" their knowledge makes them feel valued. It happens all the time on health and fitness sites, where someone posts something and another person will completely ignore the main idea of the post to focus on one little comment or statement that they think is "wrong." See how valuable and knowledgeable they are?! They corrected the misinformation!
Some people never gained the wisdom to know when speaking up is helpful and when it's obnoxious, or they just don't have the social graces to understand the appropriate response in a situation. The nice thing about the internet is that in doing so, they put it all out there for everyone else to see.
Congrats on your 22.6%! I've been around that same number according to one of those machines, and even if it's not accurate, I know how dedicated you have to have been to even get that number. You should be really proud of yourself and the work you've put in.
Thank you!
ands I understand that if i share things then its down to me to get criticism and deal with it, however. people find it easier to put people down as oppose to being pleased for people. if someone puts on facebook "going out for drinks with the girls and getting hammered" evryone thinks its awesome. lose weight, get fit and healthy people slate you!4 -
Hey, as long as you have been using the same machine, progress is progress, regardless of how accurate it is! Congrats on great results! Celebrate - and get the haters out of your life
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I did from a coworker. There was birthday cake available and I declined taking a piece. She then made a huge scene and when I told her I had just started my diet, she made fun of me and encouraged another coworker to join in on the laughs. Luckily, he had more professionalism and told her to stop. Sadly, my department will be starting a biggest loser challenge next week. And guess who put herself in charge of collecting the data? Yep... So I am seriously considering sitting it out just so I don't have to deal with her on a weekly basis...9
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ladystrick11 wrote: »I did from a coworker. There was birthday cake available and I declined taking a piece. She then made a huge scene and when I told her I had just started my diet, she made fun of me and encouraged another coworker to join in on the laughs. Luckily, he had more professionalism and told her to stop. Sadly, my department will be starting a biggest loser challenge next week. And guess who put herself in charge of collecting the data? Yep... So I am seriously considering sitting it out just so I don't have to deal with her on a weekly basis...
Plenty of accountability friends to be found on MFP - sit it out in good conscience, knowing your are 100% able to succeed without them!
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Pardyqueenxoxo wrote: »OP, some people on the internet just need to comment on things like that because they are insecure about themselves, and "showing off" their knowledge makes them feel valued. It happens all the time on health and fitness sites, where someone posts something and another person will completely ignore the main idea of the post to focus on one little comment or statement that they think is "wrong." See how valuable and knowledgeable they are?! They corrected the misinformation!
Some people never gained the wisdom to know when speaking up is helpful and when it's obnoxious, or they just don't have the social graces to understand the appropriate response in a situation. The nice thing about the internet is that in doing so, they put it all out there for everyone else to see.
Congrats on your 22.6%! I've been around that same number according to one of those machines, and even if it's not accurate, I know how dedicated you have to have been to even get that number. You should be really proud of yourself and the work you've put in.
Thank you!
ands I understand that if i share things then its down to me to get criticism and deal with it, however. people find it easier to put people down as oppose to being pleased for people. if someone puts on facebook "going out for drinks with the girls and getting hammered" evryone thinks its awesome. lose weight, get fit and healthy people slate you!
I agree... this is why I keep my fitness posts on here with my friends here. People on the internet can be a**hats.6 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »
When you share things on the internet, you cannot control who responds in what way. Yes, one hopes the world would be kinder, but that's not reality. The only thing you can control is yourself. If comments bother you, then not posting is an option. Call it what you want. 🤷🏼♀️
If you change your behavior based on their reaction then you are letting them control you though, that's the opposite. I understand that your option is easier but it's like getting rained on and instead of learning to carry an umbrella you just never go outside again.7 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »
When you share things on the internet, you cannot control who responds in what way. Yes, one hopes the world would be kinder, but that's not reality. The only thing you can control is yourself. If comments bother you, then not posting is an option. Call it what you want. 🤷🏼♀️
If you change your behavior based on their reaction then you are letting them control you though, that's the opposite. I understand that your option is easier but it's like getting rained on and instead of learning to carry an umbrella you just never go outside again.
None of that matters for the OP. Choosing not to post something is an option. That's all it is. You're making it more than it needs to be.5 -
ladystrick11 wrote: »I did from a coworker. There was birthday cake available and I declined taking a piece. She then made a huge scene and when I told her I had just started my diet, she made fun of me and encouraged another coworker to join in on the laughs. Luckily, he had more professionalism and told her to stop. Sadly, my department will be starting a biggest loser challenge next week. And guess who put herself in charge of collecting the data? Yep... So I am seriously considering sitting it out just so I don't have to deal with her on a weekly basis...
Thats horrible! but do you know what, let that keep you going, because i had it to from co-workers, even family saying "i bet she wont stick with it" " she will soon put it back on". its never ever praise or encouragement these days.
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ladystrick11 wrote: »I did from a coworker. There was birthday cake available and I declined taking a piece. She then made a huge scene and when I told her I had just started my diet, she made fun of me and encouraged another coworker to join in on the laughs. Luckily, he had more professionalism and told her to stop. Sadly, my department will be starting a biggest loser challenge next week. And guess who put herself in charge of collecting the data? Yep... So I am seriously considering sitting it out just so I don't have to deal with her on a weekly basis...
That's crazy that someone would do that at the workplace. Especially now a days when all you need is a talk with HR.
Definitely agree that you don't need that at work.2 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »
None of that matters for the OP. Choosing not to post something is an option. That's all it is. You're making it more than it needs to be.
Oh definitely but I just have a strong opinion on things like this. Telling her to just stop posting feels like victim blaming when she hasn't done anything to deserve someone being mean to her, and it really rubs me up the wrong way. Nothing personal, I just need to counter that when I see it.
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Chef_Barbell wrote: »
None of that matters for the OP. Choosing not to post something is an option. That's all it is. You're making it more than it needs to be.
Oh definitely but I just have a strong opinion on things like this. Telling her to just stop posting feels like victim blaming when she hasn't done anything to deserve someone being mean to her, and it really rubs me up the wrong way. Nothing personal, I just need to counter that when I see it.
It's really derailing the thread though.2 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »It's really derailing the thread though.
I think it's relevant. It's obviously a fairly ubiquitous experience but people have different ways of dealing with it.
To provide content: one particular family member used to say I must have been eating gluten again to have lost weight. I have ceoliac disease and was skinny when I was younger because I was malnourished. Like I would risk bowel cancer just to lose some bodyfat. I was fairly depressed at the time, unemployed and didn't have much to be proud of except that I'd managed to figure out a better way to eat and was making progress. It did feel exactly like she was just pulling me down for no reason. I can't take my own advice and just cut her out in this case but I can make it clear I'm just not accepting behavior like that anymore.
"Sorry I'm not accepting comments on my body today" shuts people up nicely.6 -
BMsJourney wrote: »ladystrick11 wrote: »I did from a coworker. There was birthday cake available and I declined taking a piece. She then made a huge scene and when I told her I had just started my diet, she made fun of me and encouraged another coworker to join in on the laughs. Luckily, he had more professionalism and told her to stop. Sadly, my department will be starting a biggest loser challenge next week. And guess who put herself in charge of collecting the data? Yep... So I am seriously considering sitting it out just so I don't have to deal with her on a weekly basis...
Plenty of accountability friends to be found on MFP - sit it out in good conscience, knowing your are 100% able to succeed without them!
That's what I was thinking. Funny enough, she made it a point to come to me yesterday because she noticed I have not signed up for the challenge yet. The deadline is today...2 -
I'm with smolmaus--you shouldn't have to change your behavior, if you've got an expectation that friends and family will be supportive. Sure, on the internet in general, anything goes. But among family, friends, and co-workers, you should be able to expect support--or failing that--silence. The internet gives people permission to be rude, crude, and socially unacceptable, and it's not something we should put up with--especially among friends and family.
I love the response, "Sorry, I'm not accepting comments on my body today." That's a healthy way to let them know they stepped out of line. I also think the original poster did a healthy thing, coming here to share, rather than what I would have done--come at them with both barrels blazing.
I suspect men don't get comments like those typically directed at women. I saw a comment toward my niece as she was losing weight and getting fit: "Your face is so cute, but you need to work out more, and lose that gut." No one would say that to a man. Everyone feels entitled to comment on female bodies--and often we accept or excuse it.
Personally, I haven't heard any negative comments from people--yet. I've still got 60 lbs to go, from being morbidly obese. I get nothing but encouragement. As I get closer to my goal, I'm sure people will have more to say. I've already heard the disbelief when I say I've got 70 to go.
Ladystrick11--Please don't let them get to you! Whether you do their "biggest loser" challenge or not, keep going. You already turned down cake, and that's hard to do when you're just starting out. You can take advantage of the diet-friendly atmosphere, talk about your losses, and not have to worry about your belittling co-worker. And wouldn't it be funny if you lost more than their winner?
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Pardyqueenxoxo wrote: »OP, some people on the internet just need to comment on things like that because they are insecure about themselves, and "showing off" their knowledge makes them feel valued. It happens all the time on health and fitness sites, where someone posts something and another person will completely ignore the main idea of the post to focus on one little comment or statement that they think is "wrong." See how valuable and knowledgeable they are?! They corrected the misinformation!
Some people never gained the wisdom to know when speaking up is helpful and when it's obnoxious, or they just don't have the social graces to understand the appropriate response in a situation. The nice thing about the internet is that in doing so, they put it all out there for everyone else to see.
Congrats on your 22.6%! I've been around that same number according to one of those machines, and even if it's not accurate, I know how dedicated you have to have been to even get that number. You should be really proud of yourself and the work you've put in.
Thank you!
ands I understand that if i share things then its down to me to get criticism and deal with it, however. people find it easier to put people down as oppose to being pleased for people. if someone puts on facebook "going out for drinks with the girls and getting hammered" evryone thinks its awesome. lose weight, get fit and healthy people slate you!
There are a few in any random crowd who applaud some others' poor choices, in order to shore up behaviors of their own that they secretly know are unproductive; or make jokes about those working hard to improve, to let themselves off the hook for not taking positive steps in their own lives. That's sad - pathetic, really, as they're on a bad long term course physically, psychologically, and socially.
But if this is the general tone of reaction around you - and please understand I mean this in the kindest way - it may be time to intentionally and gradually work at surrounding yourself with some new people, ones who have a positive attitude toward goal-setting and self-improvement, ones who will support you as you support them.4 -
Fantastic achievement and I’d suggest it’s the guy that messaged you that ‘chats s**t’.
They’re an estimate but if you’re using that same machine each time then that is very much demonstrating your tremendous progress.
You should be able to report on progress without having to worry about any sort of negative or derogatory feedback. Keep doing what you’re doing but I’d strongly consider deleting him from your social media.1 -
ladystrick11 wrote: »I did from a coworker. There was birthday cake available and I declined taking a piece. She then made a huge scene and when I told her I had just started my diet, she made fun of me and encouraged another coworker to join in on the laughs. Luckily, he had more professionalism and told her to stop. Sadly, my department will be starting a biggest loser challenge next week. And guess who put herself in charge of collecting the data? Yep... So I am seriously considering sitting it out just so I don't have to deal with her on a weekly basis...
Don't sit it out. You show her what a winner you are. If she's rude, talk to human resources.2 -
ladystrick11 wrote: »I did from a coworker. There was birthday cake available and I declined taking a piece. She then made a huge scene and when I told her I had just started my diet, she made fun of me and encouraged another coworker to join in on the laughs. Luckily, he had more professionalism and told her to stop. Sadly, my department will be starting a biggest loser challenge next week. And guess who put herself in charge of collecting the data? Yep... So I am seriously considering sitting it out just so I don't have to deal with her on a weekly basis...
No, girl!!! You go in there and own that **IT!!! She's a nasty person. You keep being amazing!!!1 -
Pardyqueenxoxo wrote: »Meant 22.6% body fat sorry! xx
Great job on your achievement!!! Don't let insecure people piss on your happiness xo
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I’m sorry you experienced that. Like others I don’t share anything concerning my weight loss at work or on social media. I HAVE found MFP to be a great place to share successes and concerns. So - share and vent here. Congrats on your progress.1
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