Less Alcohol - April 2019 - One Day at a Time
Replies
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Hi All, first time posting this month I think, although I have been reading along and cheering everyone from afar!
I ended March with a family vacation and began April with a crazy international work trip followed by a death in the family which meant another quick trip which included some drinks to drown some sorrows, so that was essentially 2 straight weeks of daily drinking - some days a couple, some days more than that. One night during the work conference I definitely overdid it, but otherwise kept mostly to my mindful moderation plan. I've figured out that the work trips is definitely what does me in with regards to racking up AF days in a month, and since I'm traveling more than I used to that's problematic. The good news is that I find sticking to an AF plan during the week when I'm home is pretty effortless now, I really don't even have to think about it anymore. Weekends too, I can have a couple of drinks at dinner (home or restaurant) and don't feel compelled to really over do it. The nicer weather is a challenge for me like it is for many of you though - I definitely feel the call of a rose or a cold beer in the sunshine.
So my April tally so far:
5/15 days AF
No more trips planned so aside from book club and one mid-week happy hour/retirement party I should be able to bring the AF total up. Hoping to finish with half the month AF. Thinking positively though, I already have more AF days this year by mid-April than I probably did all of 2017 before finding this group. I'm also refocusing on my weight management, seeing the scale creep up over the last 6-8 months since last Fall due to busy schedule, lower activity, and a general malaise about monitoring my intake. So I'm back to trying to eat at a deficit and get my activity level up again - not having the alcohol calories will help with that too!
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So this weekend was a major fail. I don't even know how many drinks I had Friday - but it was a lot. Probably in the neighborhood of 12-15. I started out having a couple beers with my wife while we made dinner, then got a text from my cousin he was at the neighborhood bar so I walked down and made up for the 1st 10 days of the month I was AF.
We had dinner with friends on Saturday and I kept it pretty laid back but still drank. On Sunday, my hoops team won our playoff game and we're heading to the league championship so we went out for a beer after the game.
So far 10/14 days have been AF. I'll take it. I'm planning on making the workweek AF and letting the weekend decide my fate, but hopefully I do a little better than this past weekend.8 -
@WinoGelato I'm so sorry for your loss.1
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@AbandondedKSCharger ...so, you learned how to change the profile picture !! Congrats, and you two are a pair of cuties !!
@beebva4 ...you are so lucky to have a significant other to begin this journey with you. One or the other of you may slip and fall, but, PLEASE, no blame. Just continue to support each other with love and the understanding that this is WAY harder than you first thought. Instead of pouring a drink to ease the irritation of a lousy day, grab hands and set off on a walk through the neighborhood \park \trail. Lousy weather ?? Exercise together, critique each other's weird attempts at body builder moves. Put on some zydeco \salsa\ancient rock 'n roll and dance together. Brew up some odd tea or coffee, and watch a movie together. Lemonade, popcorn, and binge watching "whatever". That home project...DO IT. Go to a local kid's playground and act like the kids...until the local gendarmes show up for a noise complaint call. Number one asset... a robust sense of humor.
Distraction - subtraction - substitution.
I gots all the answers. So why do I still look longingly at the old walnut wine rack I got from a retired winemaker decades ago??
132 currently empty slots. Because it is [and with disgust I admit this] it is an addiction. Can you only smoke one cigarette a day ?? One blunt a day ?? One "whatever you do with crack or meth " per day ?? Probably not.
I wish for the day that I sip one or two tiny glasses of wine with dinner, then, STOP.
Monday, Monday...
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Day 1: ugh, laying here in bed wanting to take a little drink of rum to help me get sleepy and to help my nerves. I keep thinking, "just one before bed won't count and I can still say AF for the day" but I know that is wrong. And I know I dont need it. I am about to get up and go make some stress less lavendar tea. I want to do this!
@forestdweller1 thank you! You are totally right, healthy and fun distractions are perfect!7 -
Back from my weekend away and while i did have a few drinks, i really kept it completely under control and at no point was i impatient to just open a drink, it was just as we had a meal and enjoyed ourselves.
Looking to keep it under 2 drinks a week now and im feeling positive, after thats become the new normal ill probably try and cut it out totally.5 -
I had a less-than-ideal Monday. Bought a 4 pack of wine, little 6.3 oz bottles....more than I needed for the night but the store didn't sell single ones (mistake that always gets me in trouble). So watching American Idol last night I mindlessly drank 3 and a half of them before I noticed they were almost gone! I did not remember drinking those 3..... I dumped the remainder down the drain.
Suppose best next thing to do is get up, shake if off, start fresh ASAP.8 -
I am going to continue with my goal of 4AF days per week.
Weight loss is my main motivator.
April 1 - AF
April 2 - AF
April 3 - AF
April 4 - 3 drinks
April 5 - AF - super glad to have this forum to check in to for accountability, it really does stop me some days when I have had crazy days at work and really feel like having drinks.
April 06 - 3 drinks, and up 1.6 pounds in one day from it. All the more reason for AF days : - )
April 07 - AF - planning AF for the next 3 days at least
April 08 - AF
April 09 - AF
April 10 - AF
April 11 - AF - planned night out for the 12th, jam session at a bar. I have sang without drinking before, but prefer to loosen up with a couple first...we'll see. I love being less bloated, especially in the face.
April 12 - 4 drinks - Didn't even go out to the jam in the neighbouring town. I had such a long busy workday and 9pm just seemed too late for me to start to gussie up and drive there. I probably wouldn't have had any drinks had I gone, because I was driving. I was just too tired lol. It actually was nice to relax, have a few drinks, watch hockey.
April 13 - AF
April 14 - 3 drinks - Sunday - going to make at least the next 3 days AF
April 15 - AF
Running total: 11AF days out of 15 days so far2 -
4/15
I may not have made it AF...…….but I did accomplish my previous attempts at only 3 beers. I mean, this was 3 beers not due to being hung over, having to drive some where, activities w/o alcohol. I did it by choice! I was really feeling fine. Didn't need to get that first beer first thing getting home. Considered AF for the evening, but about 7:15......yes time to sit down and watch American Idol also lol, I was ready for a beer.
Feels good, no hangover in ….5 days??? Whahooo……..6 -
Day 1: AF
Day 2: I had a SIP of my husbands drink, is that still AF? ugh i know it's not but I'm not drinking today still!8 -
I am going to continue with my goal of 4AF days per week.
Weight loss is my main motivator.
April 1 - AF
April 2 - AF
April 3 - AF
April 4 - 3 drinks
April 5 - AF - super glad to have this forum to check in to for accountability, it really does stop me some days when I have had crazy days at work and really feel like having drinks.
April 06 - 3 drinks, and up 1.6 pounds in one day from it. All the more reason for AF days : - )
April 07 - AF - planning AF for the next 3 days at least
April 08 - AF
April 09 - AF
April 10 - AF
April 11 - AF - planned night out for the 12th, jam session at a bar. I have sang without drinking before, but prefer to loosen up with a couple first...we'll see. I love being less bloated, especially in the face.
April 12 - 4 drinks - Didn't even go out to the jam in the neighbouring town. I had such a long busy workday and 9pm just seemed too late for me to start to gussie up and drive there. I probably wouldn't have had any drinks had I gone, because I was driving. I was just too tired lol. It actually was nice to relax, have a few drinks, watch hockey.
April 13 - AF
April 14 - 3 drinks - Sunday - going to make at least the next 3 days AF
April 15 - AF
April 16 - AF - home sick from work. A brandy or a glass of red wine might have been soothing, but I didn't.
Running total: 12AF days out of 16 days so far6 -
April accountability ~17 days so far
No Alcohol: 7 days
Alcohol: 10 days (23 drinks)
Goal: AF days 4 per week / 16 per month
You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine. - John C. MaxwellWhat a big change in my life … 2016-2018 I could not count my AF days … it was 2-5 glasses per night or other drink usually 6-7 nights per week. Loving the change I’ve made in 2019 and it is helping the numbers on the scale go down.
Challenging week ahead. Less than stellar start for the month. Ended up 1 day short of my goal for the week.
Apr 1 - AF
Apr 2 - AF
Apr 3 - 2 glasses of wine. Dinner at home with DH instead of going to new bar with Sisters Who Sip.
Apr 4 - 1 glass of wine w/ DH and 2 at Bunco. Slipped on that daily goal! Bunco: Plan 1 glass wine I’ve got to learn to stop at 1 at social events when there are multiple open bottles!
Apr 5 - 3 glasses of wine (did not start with the beer before hand with DH which is a win) @ camp ... drank a bottle of water before bed then out fishing in boat early this morning.
Apr 6 - 1 beer at 4pm fishing off the dock @ camp. WIN did not open the bottle of wine for dinner.
Apr 7 - AF
Second week with only 3 nights AF … not getting to my weekly goal which will make the monthly goal difficult to achieve as well!
Apr 8 - AF
Apr 9 - AF - Alumnae meeting theme “Learn the Art of Cocktails” with plenty of wine too: Plan just skip this month! Way to tempting and easy to go beyond my limits as well as the drive is 20 miles each way.
Apr 10 - 2 glasses of wine; dinner with my sister; she pulled out the bottle
Apr 11 - 2 glasses of wine; dinner with DH; he brought one home oh well
Apr 12 - AF - I had planned to drink but decided I needed to make up for the last 2 days of unexpected wine. Day out with my daughter and daughter-in-law. Spring Spectacular: shopping & mimosas: Plan limit 1 drink, daughter ordered wine with her lunch … and I declined. So flew through the day AF after all.
Apr 13 - 2 glasses of wine @ camp
Apr 14 - 1 beer + 3 glasses of wine @ camp (1 glass from 3 different bottles that were opened that evening)
Again not a great start to my week … I need to figure out how to reign it in … but if I don’t drink 2 glasses then DH opens the bottle and polishes it off on his own. Trying to balance my goals when he has thrown in the towel.
Apr 15 - 2 glasses of wine - Bookclub: Skipping @ fishing camp
Apr 16 - 2 glasses of wine @ camp
Apr 17 - AF - DH had a bottle at home which he opened before I left but I did not take the glass offered. Bookclub told them I was detoxing from all the wine I drank at the fishing camp.
My count is up 10 drinks in 5 days since I last checked in ... last night I held strong but it was hard with all the peer pressure (yes I'm over 50 and should have that part of my life under control BUT...).2 -
Went out to dinner last night and the night before. Stuck to my plan of only one each night, but I notice it on the scale- my weight is not budging! It’s way more satisfying to go AF for a few nights and see that number drop!
Got a nice compliment on my skin last night from a friend on my team. After thanking him, told him it’s probably because I had cut way back on drinking. He looked at me like I was crazy!
I am very cognizant of the fact that lots of people are not where we are in terms of wanting to cut down or go AF. When you do find someone going AF, it’s like a little secret society.3 -
13 out of 17 days AF so far. It's been a good month and a solid start to my AF goals. I've worked out 17 times, I'm eating well and I've dropped about 9lbs. I'm not sure if I can go totally AF, but cutting way back has been a huge change and I really want it to be a new way of life vs a 1 month challenge.
I read something on this thread or the other AF thread, where it mentions the amount you drink isn't what makes you an alcoholic, but how you handle it. It was like reading off a checklist of my life. Drinking to the point of blackouts, not remember everyine, always having "one" more, waking up with regrets, etc. I'm not the type that can have 1 or 2 beers and be satisfied so I'm trying to put myself in positions where I only drink occassionally, but in the right atmosphere where it's ok to be a lush.
It's opening my eyes for sure.2 -
I am very cognizant of the fact that lots of people are not where we are in terms of wanting to cut down or go AF. When you do find someone going AF, it’s like a little secret society.
That is too funny. I have often thought that myself. It is truely something special to enjoy life without as much alcohol clogging my brain.
Your doing great!
3 -
I am going to continue with my goal of 4AF days per week.
Weight loss is my main motivator.
April 1 - AF
April 2 - AF
April 3 - AF
April 4 - 3 drinks
April 5 - AF - super glad to have this forum to check in to for accountability, it really does stop me some days when I have had crazy days at work and really feel like having drinks.
April 06 - 3 drinks, and up 1.6 pounds in one day from it. All the more reason for AF days : - )
April 07 - AF - planning AF for the next 3 days at least
April 08 - AF
April 09 - AF
April 10 - AF
April 11 - AF - planned night out for the 12th, jam session at a bar. I have sang without drinking before, but prefer to loosen up with a couple first...we'll see. I love being less bloated, especially in the face.
April 12 - 4 drinks - Didn't even go out to the jam in the neighbouring town. I had such a long busy workday and 9pm just seemed too late for me to start to gussie up and drive there. I probably wouldn't have had any drinks had I gone, because I was driving. I was just too tired lol. It actually was nice to relax, have a few drinks, watch hockey.
April 13 - AF
April 14 - 3 drinks - Sunday - going to make at least the next 3 days AF
April 15 - AF
April 16 - AF - home sick from work. A brandy or a glass of red wine might have been soothing, but I didn't.
April 17 - AF - after months of being on this thread I feel like it is finally becoming my new normal. As much as I have done many AF days each month, not a day went by that I didn't feel like having drinks - I just didn't. I truly feel like I am not craving it as much now.
Running total: 13AF days out of 17 days so far5 -
I am very cognizant of the fact that lots of people are not where we are in terms of wanting to cut down or go AF. When you do find someone going AF, it’s like a little secret society.
That is too funny. I have often thought that myself. It is truely something special to enjoy life without as much alcohol clogging my brain.
Your doing great!
Yup, people don't understand. I ran into a friend who said "you have lost weight" and I said that I had, mostly because of cutting way back on alcohol. Then he said "let's go for a drink." D'oh. Secret society indeed, people don't get it. : - P3 -
@dawnbgethealthy wrote:
April 17 - AF - after months of being on this thread I feel like it is finally becoming my new normal. As much as I have done many AF days each month, not a day went by that I didn't feel like having drinks - I just didn't. I truly feel like I am not craving it as much now.
That is fantastic. I recall that exact moment. It is an aha realization. Hard to explain until you go through it. Congrats on all levels.
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"Secret Society", huh ?? No special handshake...we're the ones sitting at the table with our wine glasses upside down
[on the cloth, not over our mouths]6 -
@FeelinFooFoo I have to agree with you, I have come to realize I enjoy drinking for the effect not the taste. Like I drink when I feel stressed, or anxious. If I just don't give an f I will drink. I like that it relaxes me on stressful days, or helps combat my anxiety (at least in the moment it feels like it, when in all reality it doesn't help at all). I want to find a new way to get that "buzz" or "relief" just like you said. I want to be able to ENJOY a drink, not just drink to drink. Let me know what you come up with! Lol good luck to ya getting back into the swing of things come Monday! I need to as well. Keep letting myself down, it's no excuse but it has been so dang stressful trying to remodel and paint my whole house that I just havent cared enough. Monday can be a nds start for both of us!4
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April accountability ~18 days so far
No Alcohol: 7 days
Alcohol: 11 days (25 drinks)
Goal: AF days 4 per week / 16 per month
You’ll never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of your success is found in your daily routine. - John C. MaxwellWhat a big change in my life … 2016-2018 I could not count my AF days … it was 2-5 glasses per night or other drink usually 6-7 nights per week. Loving the change I’ve made in 2019 and it is helping the numbers on the scale go down.
Challenging week ahead. Less than stellar start for the month. Ended up 1 day short of my goal for the week.
Apr 1 - AF
Apr 2 - AF
Apr 3 - 2 glasses of wine. Dinner at home with DH instead of going to new bar with Sisters Who Sip.
Apr 4 - 1 glass of wine w/ DH and 2 at Bunco. Slipped on that daily goal! Bunco: Plan 1 glass wine I’ve got to learn to stop at 1 at social events when there are multiple open bottles!
Apr 5 - 3 glasses of wine (did not start with the beer before hand with DH which is a win) @ camp ... drank a bottle of water before bed then out fishing in boat early this morning.
Apr 6 - 1 beer at 4pm fishing off the dock @ camp. WIN did not open the bottle of wine for dinner.
Apr 7 - AF
Second week with only 3 nights AF … not getting to my weekly goal which will make the monthly goal difficult to achieve as well!
Apr 8 - AF
Apr 9 - AF - Alumnae meeting theme “Learn the Art of Cocktails” with plenty of wine too: Plan just skip this month! Way to tempting and easy to go beyond my limits as well as the drive is 20 miles each way.
Apr 10 - 2 glasses of wine; dinner with my sister; she pulled out the bottle
Apr 11 - 2 glasses of wine; dinner with DH; he brought one home oh well
Apr 12 - AF - I had planned to drink but decided I needed to make up for the last 2 days of unexpected wine. Day out with my daughter and daughter-in-law. Spring Spectacular: shopping & mimosas: Plan limit 1 drink, daughter ordered wine with her lunch … and I declined. So flew through the day AF after all.
Apr 13 - 2 glasses of wine @ camp
Apr 14 - 1 beer + 3 glasses of wine @ camp (1 glass from 3 different bottles that were opened that evening)
Again not a great start to my week … I need to figure out how to reign it in … but if I don’t drink 2 glasses then DH opens the bottle and polishes it off on his own. Trying to balance my goals when he has thrown in the towel.
Apr 15 - 2 glasses of wine - Bookclub: Skipping @ fishing camp
Apr 16 - 2 glasses of wine @ camp
Apr 17 - AF - DH had a bottle at home which he opened before I left but I did not take the glass offered. Bookclub told them I was detoxing from all the wine I drank at the fishing camp.
Apr 18 - 2 glasses of wine - Grimaldi’s pizza
Apr 19 - Good Friday Fish Fry & Crawfish Boil: Plan 2 beers2 -
Interesting article about the prevalence of the NA movement in STL yet still providing a fun social experience. The bar mentioned is actually not far from us at all and I think it’s really interesting they are giving up what’s surely one of their biggest money making nights (Saturday) to go AF. I could see maybe a weeknight but weekend? Big risk! Well Being beer referenced in the article is a really good craft NA beer option. My husband doesn’t drink for medical reasons but he always enjoyed the bar scene and loved social drinking when he was able to drink - so this is a great option for him.
https://hecmedia.org/posts/shaken-not-slurred-the-non-alcoholic-movement-in-st-louis/3 -
I am going to continue with my goal of 4AF days per week.
Weight loss is my main motivator.
April 1 - AF
April 2 - AF
April 3 - AF
April 4 - 3 drinks
April 5 - AF - super glad to have this forum to check in to for accountability, it really does stop me some days when I have had crazy days at work and really feel like having drinks.
April 06 - 3 drinks, and up 1.6 pounds in one day from it. All the more reason for AF days : - )
April 07 - AF - planning AF for the next 3 days at least
April 08 - AF
April 09 - AF
April 10 - AF
April 11 - AF - planned night out for the 12th, jam session at a bar. I have sang without drinking before, but prefer to loosen up with a couple first...we'll see. I love being less bloated, especially in the face.
April 12 - 4 drinks - Didn't even go out to the jam in the neighbouring town. I had such a long busy workday and 9pm just seemed too late for me to start to gussie up and drive there. I probably wouldn't have had any drinks had I gone, because I was driving. I was just too tired lol. It actually was nice to relax, have a few drinks, watch hockey.
April 13 - AF
April 14 - 3 drinks - Sunday - going to make at least the next 3 days AF
April 15 - AF
April 16 - AF - home sick from work. A brandy or a glass of red wine might have been soothing, but I didn't.
April 17 - AF - after months of being on this thread I feel like it is finally becoming my new normal. As much as I have done many AF days each month, not a day went by that I didn't feel like having drinks - I just didn't. I truly feel like I am not craving it as much now.
April 18 - AF - Still not logging until the following day : - )
Running total: 14AF days out of 18 days so far3 -
I am going to continue with my goal of 4AF days per week.
Weight loss is my main motivator.
April 1 - AF
April 2 - AF
April 3 - AF
April 4 - 3 drinks
April 5 - AF - super glad to have this forum to check in to for accountability, it really does stop me some days when I have had crazy days at work and really feel like having drinks.
April 06 - 3 drinks, and up 1.6 pounds in one day from it. All the more reason for AF days : - )
April 07 - AF - planning AF for the next 3 days at least
April 08 - AF
April 09 - AF
April 10 - AF
April 11 - AF - planned night out for the 12th, jam session at a bar. I have sang without drinking before, but prefer to loosen up with a couple first...we'll see. I love being less bloated, especially in the face.
April 12 - 4 drinks - Didn't even go out to the jam in the neighbouring town. I had such a long busy workday and 9pm just seemed too late for me to start to gussie up and drive there. I probably wouldn't have had any drinks had I gone, because I was driving. I was just too tired lol. It actually was nice to relax, have a few drinks, watch hockey.
April 13 - AF
April 14 - 3 drinks - Sunday - going to make at least the next 3 days AF
April 15 - AF
April 16 - AF - home sick from work. A brandy or a glass of red wine might have been soothing, but I didn't.
April 17 - AF - after months of being on this thread I feel like it is finally becoming my new normal. As much as I have done many AF days each month, not a day went by that I didn't feel like having drinks - I just didn't. I truly feel like I am not craving it as much now.
April 18 - AF - Still not logging until the following day : - )
April 19 - 2 drinks hours ago. Actually logged on the current day for a change.
Running total: 14AF days out of 19 days so far2 -
I have a four day get-a-way coming up next week. I would be dishonest with myself if I thought there were no worries that I might over indulge in alcohol while away. There is always a worry being that I have been a binge drinker in the past. My streak has been to darn good to screw it up now.
In the past 6 months I have only had 13 standard size drinks. Some of my friends say that qualifies as being totaly sober to them, but not to me it doesn't .
So I have to write out my plan for next week. I am the sole driver in our family. Absolutely no drinking then driving. Yet, if hubbie calls us a cab....then my thoughts always go very South and have caused me problems in the past.
So, here is my plan:
No more than 2 standard drinks an evening.(three evenings total 6 max)
Keep to the same drink( no mixing alcohol brands).
Drink iced tea in between adult beverages and after to flush system.
If I get a cab, stay in control of consumption.
Husband will not be happy that I am " not enjoying myself" as his alcohol brain will compute it that way because I do not have a drink in my hand the entire trip. Fact is, I know if I were not around someone that pounds the alcohol to themselves I would be fine. His persecption of "fun and good times" has always been surround by booze...and lots of it.
Sorry hun , not throwing you under the bus. But it is the truth.6 -
Yesterday beer & wine flowing at my house for a noon fish fry and then an evening crawfish boil for Good Friday. Stuck to my 2 beer plan! Then I moved on to water and tea.3
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2 glasses of wine with dinner. Losing the battle of 4 days per week AF.4
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If y'all can think of a wine to recommend to accompany eggs...scrambled...omelets...southern cheesy....deviled...Easter Hunt bounty...well, let me know...
If not...let's just forgo the vino and concentrate on the toddlers at home and the Sunday School cuties who dump their bounty into our laps expecting hugs and stickers for their efforts ...
Little do they know how we need hugs and stickers for our efforts.................
3 -
I am going to continue with my goal of 4AF days per week.
Weight loss is my main motivator.
April 1 - AF
April 2 - AF
April 3 - AF
April 4 - 3 drinks
April 5 - AF - super glad to have this forum to check in to for accountability, it really does stop me some days when I have had crazy days at work and really feel like having drinks.
April 06 - 3 drinks, and up 1.6 pounds in one day from it. All the more reason for AF days : - )
April 07 - AF - planning AF for the next 3 days at least
April 08 - AF
April 09 - AF
April 10 - AF
April 11 - AF - planned night out for the 12th, jam session at a bar. I have sang without drinking before, but prefer to loosen up with a couple first...we'll see. I love being less bloated, especially in the face.
April 12 - 4 drinks - Didn't even go out to the jam in the neighbouring town. I had such a long busy workday and 9pm just seemed too late for me to start to gussie up and drive there. I probably wouldn't have had any drinks had I gone, because I was driving. I was just too tired lol. It actually was nice to relax, have a few drinks, watch hockey.
April 13 - AF
April 14 - 3 drinks - Sunday - going to make at least the next 3 days AF
April 15 - AF
April 16 - AF - home sick from work. A brandy or a glass of red wine might have been soothing, but I didn't.
April 17 - AF - after months of being on this thread I feel like it is finally becoming my new normal. As much as I have done many AF days each month, not a day went by that I didn't feel like having drinks - I just didn't. I truly feel like I am not craving it as much now.
April 18 - AF - Still not logging until the following day : - )
April 19 - 2 drinks hours ago. Actually logged on the current day for a change.
April 20 - AF - Still battling this terrible flu/cold thing and wine would have eased the coughing...but so will Neo Citran or something before bed. Alcohol probably doesn't help much with healing anyway.
Running total: 15AF days out of 20 days so far1
This discussion has been closed.
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