Engagement rings

the_conspicuous_quesadilla
the_conspicuous_quesadilla Posts: 168 Member
edited May 2019 in Chit-Chat
I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?
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Replies

  • Unknown
    edited May 2019
    This content has been removed.
  • your_future_ex_wife
    your_future_ex_wife Posts: 4,278 Member
    edited May 2019
    I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

    Seriously.

    When I married many moons ago, I wanted a man who was financially fit enough to allow me to stay home with our eventual children. I made sure he worked steadily, had a nest egg, and I wanted a ring of decent quality to demonstrate his financial and emotional commitment.

    We did everything else on the cheap to save money, including catering our own wedding in our apartment.

    I worked and saved the down payment on our first house while we lived on his salary.

    In my opinion, we had an equitable arrangement.

    Yet, if I had it to do over, I’d do it differently.
  • rickiimarieee
    rickiimarieee Posts: 2,212 Member
    I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

    I love my ring, it was simple and passed down from his mother. Now my wedding ring is flashy and huge but my husband got a ring out of it too 😂
    But I don’t believe in the jewelry and flowers for gifts or anything. We overpay for both of those by far! And I don’t like either of them!
    But I think it’s fair to ask for a watch in return or something but the whole thing about proposing is that you’re ready to marry but not sure if she is. Unless you ask them buy a ring she wouldn’t know you’re proposing.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,021 Member
    Just my opinion, but I notice that the FIRST thing girlfriends want to see is the ring. And once they do, it's like they make a judgement on how much that man loves you. If he gave you a simple gold or silver band with no diamond, what would the reaction be you think?

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  • Unknown
    edited May 2019
    This content has been removed.
  • Unknown
    edited May 2019
    This content has been removed.
  • This content has been removed.
  • your_future_ex_wife
    your_future_ex_wife Posts: 4,278 Member
    I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

    Seriously.

    When I married many moons ago, I wanted a man who was financially fit enough to allow me to stay home with our eventual children. I made sure he worked steadily, had a nest egg, and I wanted a ring of decent quality to demonstrate his financial and emotional commitment.

    We did everything else on the cheap to save money, including catering our own wedding in our apartment.

    I worked and saved the down payment on our first house while we lived on his salary.

    In my opinion, we had an equitable arrangement.

    Yet, if I had it to do over, I’d do it differently.

    I've always imagined myself just signing the papers. Maybe having a small get-together with family at most. Not for financial reasons, I just have no desire for a big wedding.

    Yes, that was a fun way to do it. We married at the city clerk, had a party with friends and family, went to Barcelona for a honeymoon, and began our lives in earnest. Worked, saved, and after several years bought a home had some kids. We were very practical. 😐

    On paper it looked great.
  • your_future_ex_wife
    your_future_ex_wife Posts: 4,278 Member
    I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

    We did everything else on the cheap to save money, including catering our own wedding in our apartment.

    Can we just sign the papers in court? You can just draw a Rolex on my wrist with a sharpie, I'll accept that.

    yes
  • newmeadow
    newmeadow Posts: 1,295 Member
    I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

    Seriously.

    When I married many moons ago, I wanted a man who was financially fit enough to allow me to stay home with our eventual children. I made sure he worked steadily, had a nest egg, and I wanted a ring of decent quality to demonstrate his financial and emotional commitment.

    We did everything else on the cheap to save money, including catering our own wedding in our apartment.

    I worked and saved the down payment on our first house while we lived on his salary.

    In my opinion, we had an equitable arrangement.

    Yet, if I had it to do over, I’d do it differently.

    I've always imagined myself just signing the papers. Maybe having a small get-together with family at most. Not for financial reasons, I just have no desire for a big wedding.

    Yes, that was a fun way to do it. We married at the city clerk, had a party with friends and family, went to Barcelona for a honeymoon, and began our lives in earnest. Worked, saved, and after several years bought a home had some kids. We were very practical. 😐

    On paper it looked great.

    Ok but what happened?
  • your_future_ex_wife
    your_future_ex_wife Posts: 4,278 Member
    newmeadow wrote: »
    I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

    Seriously.

    When I married many moons ago, I wanted a man who was financially fit enough to allow me to stay home with our eventual children. I made sure he worked steadily, had a nest egg, and I wanted a ring of decent quality to demonstrate his financial and emotional commitment.

    We did everything else on the cheap to save money, including catering our own wedding in our apartment.

    I worked and saved the down payment on our first house while we lived on his salary.

    In my opinion, we had an equitable arrangement.

    Yet, if I had it to do over, I’d do it differently.

    I've always imagined myself just signing the papers. Maybe having a small get-together with family at most. Not for financial reasons, I just have no desire for a big wedding.

    Yes, that was a fun way to do it. We married at the city clerk, had a party with friends and family, went to Barcelona for a honeymoon, and began our lives in earnest. Worked, saved, and after several years bought a home had some kids. We were very practical. 😐

    On paper it looked great.

    Ok but what happened?

    We always long most for what is lacking
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Blame the diamond industry.. like everything else now a days.. it's all materials/commercial manufactured must have. if you looking for the "right" person.. the heart is all that matters.. my wife knew I was not financially stable when we dated.. so she didn't mind the birthstone ring I gave her for engagement ring. 19 years later.. still hasn't bugged about the ring. She wears it everyday since.
  • samtarlyonadiet
    samtarlyonadiet Posts: 917 Member
    The love a man giveth his lady is worth more than any diamond in the world
  • your_future_ex_wife
    your_future_ex_wife Posts: 4,278 Member
    and yes, if he’d wanted a watch, if it was something important to him, I would have done that for him.
  • Unknown
    edited May 2019
    This content has been removed.
  • your_future_ex_wife
    your_future_ex_wife Posts: 4,278 Member
    edited May 2019
    It was just so special to me, that he, as a not wealthy person, put his money where his mouth is. If it had been easy, it would have meant nothing to me.

    He worked really hard
  • your_future_ex_wife
    your_future_ex_wife Posts: 4,278 Member
    lx1x wrote: »
    Blame the diamond industry.. like everything else now a days.. it's all materials/commercial manufactured must have. if you looking for the "right" person.. the heart is all that matters.. my wife knew I was not financially stable when we dated.. so she didn't mind the birthstone ring I gave her for engagement ring. 19 years later.. still hasn't bugged about the ring. She wears it everyday since.

    :)

    There are definitely ladies out here who don't get hung up on the material things.

    Don't get me wrong - I would enjoy gifting nice things to a special lady. The ring thing is just something I've thought about since a while back ago. Although maybe it's hypocritical since as of right now I'm toying with the idea of buying a gold ring studded with rubies for myself..

    Check it out:

    jig16vc1zbo9.jpg

    Yeah or nay?

    That’s really pretty
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    lx1x wrote: »
    Blame the diamond industry.. like everything else now a days.. it's all materials/commercial manufactured must have. if you looking for the "right" person.. the heart is all that matters.. my wife knew I was not financially stable when we dated.. so she didn't mind the birthstone ring I gave her for engagement ring. 19 years later.. still hasn't bugged about the ring. She wears it everyday since.

    :)

    There are definitely ladies out here who don't get hung up on the material things.

    Don't get me wrong - I would enjoy gifting nice things to a special lady. The ring thing is just something I've thought about since a while back ago. Although maybe it's hypocritical since as of right now I'm toying with the idea of buying a gold ring studded with rubies for myself..

    It's personal preference really. If you want to give her the ring of your choice it really doesnt matter what others think. It's between you and your lady.

  • newmeadow
    newmeadow Posts: 1,295 Member
    lx1x wrote: »
    Blame the diamond industry.. like everything else now a days.. it's all materials/commercial manufactured must have. if you looking for the "right" person.. the heart is all that matters.. my wife knew I was not financially stable when we dated.. so she didn't mind the birthstone ring I gave her for engagement ring. 19 years later.. still hasn't bugged about the ring. She wears it everyday since.

    :)

    There are definitely ladies out here who don't get hung up on the material things.

    Don't get me wrong - I would enjoy gifting nice things to a special lady. The ring thing is just something I've thought about since a while back ago. Although maybe it's hypocritical since as of right now I'm toying with the idea of buying a gold ring studded with rubies for myself..

    Check it out:

    jig16vc1zbo9.jpg

    Yeah or nay?

    I don't understand. It looks like an Arabian wedding ring and it would be, like, you're marrying yourself. But it's okay I know someone who really did that.
  • This content has been removed.
  • your_future_ex_wife
    your_future_ex_wife Posts: 4,278 Member
    I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

    We did everything else on the cheap to save money, including catering our own wedding in our apartment.

    Can we just sign the papers in court? You can just draw a Rolex on my wrist with a sharpie, I'll accept that.

    yes

    Is that an "I do"?

    For as long as love shall last.
  • Unknown
    edited May 2019
    This content has been removed.
  • newmeadow
    newmeadow Posts: 1,295 Member
    newmeadow wrote: »
    lx1x wrote: »
    Blame the diamond industry.. like everything else now a days.. it's all materials/commercial manufactured must have. if you looking for the "right" person.. the heart is all that matters.. my wife knew I was not financially stable when we dated.. so she didn't mind the birthstone ring I gave her for engagement ring. 19 years later.. still hasn't bugged about the ring. She wears it everyday since.

    :)

    There are definitely ladies out here who don't get hung up on the material things.

    Don't get me wrong - I would enjoy gifting nice things to a special lady. The ring thing is just something I've thought about since a while back ago. Although maybe it's hypocritical since as of right now I'm toying with the idea of buying a gold ring studded with rubies for myself..

    Check it out:

    jig16vc1zbo9.jpg

    Yeah or nay?

    I don't understand. It looks like an Arabian wedding ring and it would be, like, you're marrying yourself. But it's okay I know someone who really did that.

    I just see it as fancy "bling"

    It is fancy and I actually really like it. Something about it makes me really hot
  • This content has been removed.
  • This content has been removed.
  • This content has been removed.
  • newmeadow
    newmeadow Posts: 1,295 Member
    newmeadow wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    lx1x wrote: »
    Blame the diamond industry.. like everything else now a days.. it's all materials/commercial manufactured must have. if you looking for the "right" person.. the heart is all that matters.. my wife knew I was not financially stable when we dated.. so she didn't mind the birthstone ring I gave her for engagement ring. 19 years later.. still hasn't bugged about the ring. She wears it everyday since.

    :)

    There are definitely ladies out here who don't get hung up on the material things.

    Don't get me wrong - I would enjoy gifting nice things to a special lady. The ring thing is just something I've thought about since a while back ago. Although maybe it's hypocritical since as of right now I'm toying with the idea of buying a gold ring studded with rubies for myself..

    Check it out:

    jig16vc1zbo9.jpg

    Yeah or nay?

    I don't understand. It looks like an Arabian wedding ring and it would be, like, you're marrying yourself. But it's okay I know someone who really did that.

    I just see it as fancy "bling"

    It is fancy and I actually really like it. Something about it makes me really hot

    Hot and bothered? :lol:

    It makes me wish I had one of my own but 24 kt gold and gems of similar hue don't compliment my skin tone. I look my best with amethyst, pearl, diamonds, turquoise, sterling and a paler hue of 14 kt gold.