Engagement rings

the_conspicuous_quesadilla

I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

newmeadow

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I ever gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

I'll give you a wash of equal value.

But seriously. She's giving you access to her intimate anatomical arenas and that should be a priceless gift. Unlike a wash.

At least that used to be true when you needed collateral before you got approved for a loan if you know what I mean.

Now it's a big free for all and jewelry shop sales are really on the decline and there's more herpes than ever.

your_future_ex_wife

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

Seriously.

When I married many moons ago, I wanted a man who was financially fit enough to allow me to stay home with our eventual children. I made sure he worked steadily, had a nest egg, and I wanted a ring of decent quality to demonstrate his financial and emotional commitment.

We did everything else on the cheap to save money, including catering our own wedding in our apartment.

I worked and saved the down payment on our first house while we lived on his salary.

In my opinion, we had an equitable arrangement.

Yet, if I had it to do over, I’d do it differently.

mmereth

I think a big, fancy ring is not necessary to establish how much you love your significant other. If the two of you have been together long enough to be contemplating marriage and she doesn't know this about you, I would suggest you don't know each other well enough to get married, and if you are being pressured or coerced into purchasing a ring you aren't comfortable with, she's probably not the right girl for you. I would also remind you that giving someone an engagement ring (whatever the size) isn't a trade, where you expect something in return (other than marriage), so if she wants/chooses to buy you a watch, well then celebrate her generosity, but don't look at it like something you are entitled to.

rickiimarieee

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

I love my ring, it was simple and passed down from his mother. Now my wedding ring is flashy and huge but my husband got a ring out of it too 😂
But I don’t believe in the jewelry and flowers for gifts or anything. We overpay for both of those by far! And I don’t like either of them!
But I think it’s fair to ask for a watch in return or something but the whole thing about proposing is that you’re ready to marry but not sure if she is. Unless you ask them buy a ring she wouldn’t know you’re proposing.

ninerbuff

Just my opinion, but I notice that the FIRST thing girlfriends want to see is the ring. And once they do, it's like they make a judgement on how much that man loves you. If he gave you a simple gold or silver band with no diamond, what would the reaction be you think?

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newmeadow

I cherish my diamonds and would never crush them into tiny sharks.

your_future_ex_wife

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

your_future_ex_wife wrote: »

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

Seriously.

When I married many moons ago, I wanted a man who was financially fit enough to allow me to stay home with our eventual children. I made sure he worked steadily, had a nest egg, and I wanted a ring of decent quality to demonstrate his financial and emotional commitment.

We did everything else on the cheap to save money, including catering our own wedding in our apartment.

I worked and saved the down payment on our first house while we lived on his salary.

In my opinion, we had an equitable arrangement.

Yet, if I had it to do over, I’d do it differently.

I've always imagined myself just signing the papers. Maybe having a small get-together with family at most. Not for financial reasons, I just have no desire for a big wedding.

Yes, that was a fun way to do it. We married at the city clerk, had a party with friends and family, went to Barcelona for a honeymoon, and began our lives in earnest. Worked, saved, and after several years bought a home had some kids. We were very practical. 😐

On paper it looked great.

your_future_ex_wife

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

your_future_ex_wife wrote: »

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

We did everything else on the cheap to save money, including catering our own wedding in our apartment.

Can we just sign the papers in court? You can just draw a Rolex on my wrist with a sharpie, I'll accept that.

yes

newmeadow

your_future_ex_wife wrote: »

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

your_future_ex_wife wrote: »

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

Seriously.

When I married many moons ago, I wanted a man who was financially fit enough to allow me to stay home with our eventual children. I made sure he worked steadily, had a nest egg, and I wanted a ring of decent quality to demonstrate his financial and emotional commitment.

We did everything else on the cheap to save money, including catering our own wedding in our apartment.

I worked and saved the down payment on our first house while we lived on his salary.

In my opinion, we had an equitable arrangement.

Yet, if I had it to do over, I’d do it differently.

I've always imagined myself just signing the papers. Maybe having a small get-together with family at most. Not for financial reasons, I just have no desire for a big wedding.

Yes, that was a fun way to do it. We married at the city clerk, had a party with friends and family, went to Barcelona for a honeymoon, and began our lives in earnest. Worked, saved, and after several years bought a home had some kids. We were very practical. 😐

On paper it looked great.

Ok but what happened?

your_future_ex_wife

newmeadow wrote: »

your_future_ex_wife wrote: »

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

your_future_ex_wife wrote: »

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

I'm of the mindset that I don't need to purchase a lady a fancy and expensive engagement ring to show my love for her. But if I felt pressured, gave in and purchased one, I think maybe the girl should get me a watch of at least equal value? I joked around about this in another thread, but what are your thoughts and opinions?

Seriously.

When I married many moons ago, I wanted a man who was financially fit enough to allow me to stay home with our eventual children. I made sure he worked steadily, had a nest egg, and I wanted a ring of decent quality to demonstrate his financial and emotional commitment.

We did everything else on the cheap to save money, including catering our own wedding in our apartment.

I worked and saved the down payment on our first house while we lived on his salary.

In my opinion, we had an equitable arrangement.

Yet, if I had it to do over, I’d do it differently.

I've always imagined myself just signing the papers. Maybe having a small get-together with family at most. Not for financial reasons, I just have no desire for a big wedding.

Yes, that was a fun way to do it. We married at the city clerk, had a party with friends and family, went to Barcelona for a honeymoon, and began our lives in earnest. Worked, saved, and after several years bought a home had some kids. We were very practical. 😐

On paper it looked great.

Ok but what happened?

We always long most for what is lacking

lx1x

Blame the diamond industry.. like everything else now a days.. it's all materials/commercial manufactured must have. if you looking for the "right" person.. the heart is all that matters.. my wife knew I was not financially stable when we dated.. so she didn't mind the birthstone ring I gave her for engagement ring. 19 years later.. still hasn't bugged about the ring. She wears it everyday since.

samtarlyonadiet

The love a man giveth his lady is worth more than any diamond in the world

your_future_ex_wife

and yes, if he’d wanted a watch, if it was something important to him, I would have done that for him.

your_future_ex_wife

It was just so special to me, that he, as a not wealthy person, put his money where his mouth is. If it had been easy, it would have meant nothing to me.

He worked really hard

your_future_ex_wife

the_conspicuous_quesadilla wrote: »

lx1x wrote: »

Blame the diamond industry.. like everything else now a days.. it's all materials/commercial manufactured must have. if you looking for the "right" person.. the heart is all that matters.. my wife knew I was not financially stable when we dated.. so she didn't mind the birthstone ring I gave her for engagement ring. 19 years later.. still hasn't bugged about the ring. She wears it everyday since.

There are definitely ladies out here who don't get hung up on the material things.

Don't get me wrong - I would enjoy gifting nice things to a special lady. The ring thing is just something I've thought about since a while back ago. Although maybe it's hypocritical since as of right now I'm toying with the idea of buying a gold ring studded with rubies for myself..

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