Want your honest opinions, please

thelaurameister

It's important to strive for what makes YOU most comfortable, at the end of the day that is what matters most. BUT, I would recommend staying within the healthy BMI range for your height for the sake of your overall well-being... Especially being that you said it's really hard to get below a certain weight. I'd imagine that's your body's way of telling you that you're not meant to be that small because it can potentially be just as harmful towards your health to be underweight as it is to be overweight (which you're not even classified as "overweight" on the BMI scale right now). If you're happier at a teeny tiny weight, so be it, it is your body. However don't be surprised if health or menstrual cycle issues start showing up if you're underweight for a long run.

crazorbaq

girl, you need some muscle. i think a little good bulk with go a long way !

MeganMcK11

sounds like body dysmorphia. have you had counseling?

Agreed.

ionella24

Hi, you said you exercise a few times a week, weight lifting and what else. Well when you exercise with weight lifting you also build muscular mass so maybe that's what makes you think you are big. It's probably just your brain telling you you're too big or something. Wouldn't advise going on a diet, especially one where you would have to be a bit hungry. That's a bad idea and if you do exercise you need food->energy to be able to do the exercise. You are fine for your height, just enjoy the life and be thankful for what you have. Don't mean to be rude, but maybe you need to change your wardrobe and find clothes that do compliment your figure?

ionella24

PS: Just had a look at your pics. You look really thin, don't know why you think you need to lose weight.

runningonmargaritas

I'm 5'9 and consider myself thin at 135-140. I feel comfortable and healthy between 145-150. It really depends on your specific body type.

bookworm_847

Based on the photo, body dysmorphia sounds about right.

Agree.

I'm 5'9", and a few months before I got married, I was about 135 lbs. A lot of people said that I looked too thin. I was happy about the number on the scale, but not about how I looked or felt. I was 145 when I got married and felt better then. Fast forward a few years and I'm now trying to get back to 145 from 183. My husband told me earlier this summer that I look better now than I did when we got married, and I still have 10ish pounds to go.

The difference is that I've been exercising, including lifting some weights, and eating better. I feel better now than I ever have. If you want to change the way your body looks, focus on the weights and taking good care of yourself. I personally don't think you need to lose any more weight.

Without getting into the unpleasantries in my past, I understand the desire to have the scale read a certain number. There's still a part of me who would love to see something in the 130's just because that's a low weight for someone my height. In the past, being skinny is who I was (so I thought), so I wanted to maintain that. That part of me, along with the rest, is in therapy working through some issues. I know now that the number on the scale doesn't mean a whole lot... the important results of weight loss are how you feel and look.

If this is really weighing on your mind, it might be worth it to talk to a doctor and perhaps look into some therapy. Just based on your picture, you could be starting down a dangerous road if you want to keep dropping the weight just for the sake of the number on the scale.

Good luck.

thisismeraw

By looking at your pictures I would say don't lose anymore weight. I would actually gain weight as you look very thin and are almost at the lower end of your healthy weight range.

Eat above maintenance calories, get more than enough protein and lift heavy weights. Do very little cardio. Build muscle.

If you feel the need to get to such a low weight and feel fat at the weight you are please see a doctor as it isn't healthy behaviour.

Hildy_J

You look FABULOUS! Lose a few more if you want and ignore the negative comments.

I've just come back from Paris. Those Parisian ladies know how to stay slim and they look amazing.

It's all relative - on here, you probably look thin or too thin to some people. For Paris you'd be about right! :-)

Best wishes

Jenny x

sweetpea129

Where exactly do you want to lose the weight from?! Honest opinion is that your goal is way too low.

sandikegz

I'm about the same as you girl. Maybe an inch shorter and my goal weight is 125. When I go above 130, I feel fat. When I was below 120, I was way too skinny. You could see it in my face even. I had a eating disorder though and had a complete lack of appetite. So all and all I say strive for what makes you comfortable. For me, that's 125!!!

QuietBloom

Here is a website full of body images that will help you see what people look like at the height you choose. I'm 5'9 and my goal is 145! If I were 120, I'd have no shape.

http://www.mybodygallery.com/

Hey, thanks so much for that link! It's super helpful!

Theycallithogging

Just wanted to say thanks to those who've taken the time to respond with honesty and impartiality. There are lots of defensive/ indignant responses I could make to some of the other replies but let's not go there.

I'll talk to one of the trainers at the gym about some strength training and take it from there. I admit I focus on running more than I do on strength, but it's the mental freedom/ physical outdoorsiness of it that I love as much as the calorie-burn aspect. Need to tweak that thinking maybe.

Thanks again

metacognition

If I might ask, what makes you feel fat at a healthy 130 pounds ?
Do you see visible excess body fat in some areas ? If so, it may be worth it to consider lifting weights and changing your amount of lean tissue. You can eat at maintenance, drop fat mass and get firm / slimmer looking without actually having to lose weight via the scale.

I have seen perfectly healthy people who are natural ectomorphs and underweight by 5 - 25 pounds.
They did not diet to stay small. They just remember being that way forever. One of them had naturally narrow hips, small wrists, almost no bust and ate all the time. She was also glowing and energetic; she didn't look malnourished. The other one looked a little gaunt but told me that she wanted to gain weight to get curvy. These people are not anorexics.

Most women are not naturally skinny and even most skinny people fall within a healthy weight range without a lot of effort. So if you have to work hard to maintain the lower end of a healthy BMI, chances are you are meant to stay somewhere within that normal range.

Add lean mass and lose fat mass if you want to look thinner.

Theycallithogging

Metacognition: I have fat legs. Thighs, mostly. But yes, I will look at extra strength/ muscle work.

JanMarie2BHealthy

I am 5'10" and back in the day (high school) I weighed 112-115 - played volleyball, basketball, track. When I married I was 120-122 and looked fine (thin but fine because of athletics and fitness routine). I, too, had heavier legs due to athletics and ended up toning them and developing some super definition and then I was happier with the 'heavier leg look'. However, that was a LONG time ago. I do remember though, when I hit 145-150 - people just thought I was da' bomb. I wish you well and wonder if leg strengthening for definition would help you with the leg illusion - that is what I called it - leg illusion as my arms and stomach and chest were too thin actually. Some people here also (who know a lot about nutrition and such) have given you some good advice too Just a thought but I would not go thinner because you mentioned you were a Mom and you need to set an example for the family.

hzliiz

Yeah... I exercise kind of a lot I guess... Couple of strength session per week plus minimum 35kms running ( broken up over 3 sessions)
I just think I look better skiinny. Annoyingly, I look better a few pounds heavier in a bathing suit. But dressed I look better skinny. And you spend most of your time dressed... So.....
But it's hard work to get the numbers low. Not much food. I wonder if life's too short to be hungry, or if life's too short to feel heavy..

OP I was mostly struck by the last sentences. If you're having to restrict that much to attain a certain weight then yes that weight is too low. I'm 5'6" and 132. In the throes of my ED when I was younger I'd get down to mid 120s but only on maybe 500-700 calories a day. Having to starve is a sure sign one is well outside her wheelhouse with regard to weight. Best of luck to you, take care of yourself!

Nicolee_2014

Judging from your profile pic you look like a chubby Grey faceless alien person. That is my thought on the matter.

:laugh:

morethanthis0

I am 5'9 as well and ideal weight for our height is about 145. I would like to be 150 one day. I saw someone mention doing strength training, maybe try that to tone up. You may not lose lbs, but you will tone and look more fit.

Seesawboomerang

I'd say life's definitely too short to feel hungry! Everything feels like such hard work.

With strength training, you might even get heavier, but you will feel STRONG. Big difference and should make you feel happier about your body composition.

You can't really change where fat is prone to gather. Losing weight alone will not target your fattier zones. A bit of weight training can target and tone though so I believe this will help.

Rilzy

My honest opinion is that 120 is waaaay too low. I'm 5"5 and I wouldn't want to go lower than 125 and you have four inches on me. Even if 120 would be healthy for you (which I don't think it is) I believe that your body will fight you every step of the way to stay at that weight. Looking at your photo I think that you should not lose any weight more weight. You can try lifting more weights even though the scale might creep up a bit but you will look sleeker. And to your question, life is too short to feel hungry.

Rilzy

Metacognition: I have fat legs. Thighs, mostly. But yes, I will look at extra strength/ muscle work.

Fat thighs? I've just hat a look your photos. Where? I think you give yourself a lot less credit than you deserve. No offense but if your thighs were much slimmer it would be unattractive and unhealthy looking.

Lovelovesme

It sounds to me like you need to go spend some time with a puppy they give loads of unconditional love to remind you that the only place that it really matters if you're big or small is the heart

1KiwiChick

looking at your pics i would suggest not worrying about losing weight and maybe focus on building some muscle. You look very slim to me and a bit of curve is lovely on a woman ! im sure the lads on here will agree! anyway its your journey and its how you feel in your self that matters not what we think but thats my suggestion

barbarajean3

If you feel fat dressed. Try having your clothes tailored to you. It can make a big difference in how you look in them. I personally would love to be your height and weight :flowerforyou:

ceciljackson

I don't think 120 at 5'9 is fat at all! But you have to like you so I would say it's worth the effort.

krishibbs

It's amazing how reading threads can sometimes give you a moment of clarity. In reading this thread I am starting to think that perhaps my weight is where is should be and the work I need to do is not so much on the scale but with weights. I can see that I am in the lower range of my "weight category" and my bmi is about 21 (according to websites). I am 5.8" and 142 pounds. I seem to be having a lot of difficulty getting below this and perhaps it's because I'm not supposed to? I am in the process of looking for a personal trainer to support me with this. Anyway, just wanted to thank everyone who uses mfp for being so honest and sharing their knoweldge. Cheers to a great weekend everyone!

HardcoreP0rk

Metacognition: I have fat legs. Thighs, mostly. But yes, I will look at extra strength/ muscle work.

I know the feeling. I always think I have fat thighs, and people tell me I have gorgeous legs. But its your body and your happiness. I try to work out enough that I feel like this is my natural healthy form. If I didnt work out, then I would have more reasons to just think my thighs were fat. It's so mental.

You say you're not getting much food. And that life is too short to be hungry. I personally think you look amazing, and would like to see you enjoying life at the same time. Only you have control over your own happiness though.

TavistockToad

Metacognition: I have fat legs. Thighs, mostly.

No, you don't....