Creepy guy at the Gym

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  • jlahorn
    jlahorn Posts: 377 Member
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    Always trust your instincts. Always.

    There's a great book that gets recommended a lot to people who are getting that "creepy" vibe but aren't sure whether they're overreacting:

    http://www.amazon.com/Other-Survival-Signals-Protect-Violence/dp/0440508835/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1376663220&sr=8-1&keywords=the+gift+of+fear

    Essentially, the book explains how we subconsciously recognize the signs of violent or even just not-quite-right-in-the-head people by their body language and tone of voice long before they do or say anything that would give us concrete evidence.

    Better safe than sorry.
  • JenAndSome
    JenAndSome Posts: 1,908 Member
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    If you can't get someone to come with you, tell him that gym time is me time and you like to do it alone. If he keeps bothering you after that let the gym management know what's happening.
  • jesusHchris
    jesusHchris Posts: 1,405 Member
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    Come on people, this thread is not real. The OP is a fake account with no friends and no other posts. The profile picture is stolen from the Internet and is all over the place.
  • MsEndomorph
    MsEndomorph Posts: 604 Member
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    Yes, because a lack of paranoia means they have never been grabbed. attacked, or intimidated. And I highly doubt that treadmills at a gym are a place where sexual danger happens on a regular basis. Maybe if you weren't afraid of your own shadow, you would realize that just because a guy says hi and is being friendly doesn't mean he is going to assault you.
    lemons are yellow and lemons are fruit, therefore all fruit must be yellow.

    true story.

    This made literally no sense.

    It's an example of a logical fallacy.

    On another note. I like how so many people are so passionately defending a stranger. He could be the worlds BIGGEST creeper or a frickin saint. We have no idea. I'd trust my own intuition before I'd trust a bunch of people on the Internet, OP. If you're uncomfortable (and you're not ALWAYS uncomfortable), do something. Find a gym buddy or change the times you go.
  • ElliottTN
    ElliottTN Posts: 1,614 Member
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    On a different forum I visit regularly, a well known contributor posted his story about this topic. Apparently he is a pretty friendly guy, the type that always goes out of his way to encourage people, always says hi, offers his help, just sociable and kind of a nice guy.

    His creeper story started at his local gym. Apparently he smiled and said hi to this girl there. She kinda blew him off but no big deal to him. She then jumped on the treadmill. He apparently always goes to the same treadmill. Considers it his treadmill...guess its a mental thing. Regardless, "his treadmill" was right behind this girls treadmill so he jumped on it to workout. Their workouts ended basically at the same time. As a last ditch effort to be friendly he asked if she had a good run to which she looked at him funny and walked away. A few minutes later he was confronted in front of everyone by the security guard and a manager. They asked him to leave and not come back because he making the female patrons uncomfortable. Apparently the conversation was loud and embarrassing while he was trying to explain himself until his boyfriend came up and set things straight.

    Now, I have a wife and I always want her to follow her instincts as there is no doubt some creepy *kitten* out there. BUT, reading things like this make me laugh bc sometimes its useless to explain to some females that just bc a guys eyes drift in your direction doesn't mean we are interested in you. Sometimes it does, sometimes not and you should always follow your instincts but not always dramatically jump to conclusions and do some irrational **** to others on a hunch. That guy looking at you might be interested sexually, he might be impressed with your workout, he might just be trying to be friendly ad he very well might like male anatomy way more than you. Don't be a reverse creeper. Not everyone wants to bend you over just because you have tits.
  • shannashannabobana
    shannashannabobana Posts: 625 Member
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    Always trust your instincts. Always.

    There's a great book that gets recommended a lot to people who are getting that "creepy" vibe but aren't sure whether they're overreacting:

    http://www.amazon.com/Other-Survival-Signals-Protect-Violence/dp/0440508835/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1376663220&sr=8-1&keywords=the+gift+of+fear
    Absolutely. If you are getting a vibe, don't ignore it. Don't overreact, like calling the police, but maybe try some of the other suggestions to make sure you're not reading him wrong. If it's just that someone's interested and you're not (and he's not actually in any way dangerous) they will work for that as well.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    Come on people, this thread is not real. The OP is a fake account with no friends and no other posts. The profile picture is stolen from the Internet and is all over the place.

    Yeah, this! Obviously. She posted the topic and has allowed it to go on for pages and pages of people over reacting, taking this very seriously and personally, and blowing it out of proportion even further than it already was, jumping to a billion conclusions. She has not been back to respond one single time (take a clue people).
  • ksuh999
    ksuh999 Posts: 543 Member
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    It ain't creeping until the chloroform comes out.

    I dunno, I never, ever approach women I don't know at the gym unless it's to use the machine they're using. Just too creepy otherwise. Also I'm too busy working out.
  • MommyisFit
    MommyisFit Posts: 139 Member
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    There is a creepy guy at my gym. He moves around on different equipment, but does not work out. He just sits there are stares at women. There have been a ton of complaints about him, but he has never done anything wrong so they can't just kick him out. Now, I think he is super creepy - but it is not me I'm worried about. He always sits on the equipment near the childcare room. I am worried about my kids! The staff is aware of him and keep a close eye out, but I've been a little nervous to go into classes lately where I cannot keep my eye on the childcare room.
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,951 Member
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    I suspect there would be fewer sexual assaults if women trusted their instincts and stopped worrying about being polite to men who can't take a hint.

    No. There would be fewer sexual assaults if sexual assaulters quit sexually assaulting.
    *sigh*

    Yes, the way to not be a victim is to expect that by telling bad people not to do bad things will stop them from donig bad things.

    As I'm walking down a dark alley alone one night and a rapist jumps out, I'll just say, "Hey, don't do that. It's mean." I'm sure that will work.

    Do it after you pull your pistol. Works like a charm. ;)
  • JDHINAZ
    JDHINAZ Posts: 641 Member
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    not even a tiny problem. Just get a HILLARY 2016 shirt and ERA shirts. you won't have to say or do anything. he'll leave you alone -
    or at least I'm pretty sure that's the reason they leave me strictly alone
    Feminazi. they hate that (doesn't have to be true, just put it out there and let them draw their own conclusions)

    Hilarious!
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    Ok so... help me out, what is a good approach?

    You're hot, I'm digging it, we're at the gym. What would at least not cause you to immediately go home and blog/forum post about my creepiness.

    I've always been curious at that.

    Here's an instructional video (substitute gym for workplace): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBVuAGFcGKY

    The answer is to "Be handsome. Be attractive. Don't be unattractive". LOL
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,951 Member
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    Ok so... help me out, what is a good approach?

    You're hot, I'm digging it, we're at the gym. What would at least not cause you to immediately go home and blog/forum post about my creepiness.

    I've always been curious at that.

    Here's an instructional video (substitute gym for workplace): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBVuAGFcGKY

    The answer is to "Be handsome. Be attractive. Don't be unattractive". LOL

    I'm already the first two, maybe I should make a jacket out of benjamins too, with the name "Rainmaker" on the lapel. ;)
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    Men can't even walk up to a woman now without getting pepper sprayed and having the police called on them. I'm not overreacting at all. This happens all the time. I see it happen daily and have men crying on my shoulders constantly over this happening to them. This is a real, actual problem. No one is over reacting to this troll post, and making it into more than it is. This troll does not actually have you all as putty in his/her hands. My heart is aching for this poor, imaginary, rejected man. I feel like I know him personally and can get inside his head and know everything he is thinking and doing and hoping for. This isn't just one imaginary man, this is all men (who can't ever talk to women...EVER).

    Edit: Sorry my patience level for the forums is wearing thin.
  • __Di__
    __Di__ Posts: 1,630 Member
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    I love the judgyness of people who have never had a close call, never been grabbed or attacked or intimidated. it must be lovely to come from a perspective of never having been in sexual danger and tell those who have that they're silly ###'s for following their gut instinct when somebody makes them uncomfortable.

    Don't be so judgemental yourself, how would you know what people have or have not endured or come across?

    You don't.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    I love the judgyness of people who have never had a close call, never been grabbed or attacked or intimidated. it must be lovely to come from a perspective of never having been in sexual danger and tell those who have that they're silly ###'s for following their gut instinct when somebody makes them uncomfortable.

    Don't be so judgemental yourself, how would you know what people have or have not endured or come across?

    You don't.

    Yeah, I have to agree with this. It's important not to jump to conclusions about what people have or have not experienced. You simply don't know. And no one should have to disclose that information when they don't want to. This can get into a really difficult topic for a lot of people, and sometimes we need distance from that part of our lives as we go about the rest of our lives.
  • manisha_ja
    manisha_ja Posts: 4
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    Another one month I wont use the threadmill I will be out on the roads..thankfully
  • manisha_ja
    manisha_ja Posts: 4
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    NO not yet..but what is more annoying is when I am stretching he comes and checks me out and keeps coming again and again ..he doesnt work out much
  • BonnieandClyde29
    BonnieandClyde29 Posts: 1,026 Member
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    You know what I just commented on your thread last night, and I thought of you today after this happened!!! ahhh...

    On my way walking to the gym @ my apt. complex, were 2 guys sitting on their porch literally hollering at me, making noises, whistles the whole 9 right?! I go on the elliptical, and 20 mins in, walk these dumb arses with no shirts or even shoes just sitting on the gym equipment watching me! OMG I was livid!!! I just gave them the death stare and left before I went crazy on them!!!

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